Against All Odds
by HappyAuriga
Summary: Lily's story.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: This is the very first novel length story I ever wrote. I know that it doesn't take much to improve it in places but for me, personally, this is my most important piece of writing. I love it like it is. I will correct typos and grammar where I find mistakes but other than that I want to leave it like it is.

The story was written after Order of the Phoenix came out. Therefore it is, of course, contradicting canon. Nevertheless I was pleasantly surprised how much I got right when I read Deathly Hallows.

**Against All Odds**

Chapter 1: The journey

The girl eyed the platform in admiration. People in strange clothes were crowding it. People in robes. People in weird assortments of casual clothing. People who were like her.

A huge number of teenagers were getting ready to board a train which was to be pulled by a purple steam engine. Parents were helping their offspring find seats and stow away their luggage which mostly consisted of big trunks. Many of the young people had cages with them, most of which contained cats or owls.

"Come, Lily, dear, or all seats will have been taken," said the caring voice of her father beside her. "Yes, dad." Lily tried to stop staring and followed her father towards the train. "I wish there was anyone we knew," said Mr Evans. "I know you´re a big girl and will handle it, but I´d really feel better if you were not all alone."

His wife stroked her daughter´s red hair. "Don´t be worried, dear, Lily´s going to be all right." She smiled as the girl turned around. "You are, aren´t you?"

"Yes, mum. Will you say good bye to Petunia from me?"

"Of course, I will. Next time she´ll come with us to see you on the train. You´ll see."

"Tell her, I´m sorry. I didn´t know I could do it."

"She knows that. But I´ll tell her again."

Mr Evans had found an empty compartment and put his daughter´s trunk into the luggage rack. "Here´s your seat, dear!" he cried and turned around to look for his wife and daughter. Suddenly somebody caught his eye. "Oh, what a surprise. I never thought to meet someone from the neighbourhood here." He shook hands with a tall woman with black hair and heavy black brows.

Mrs Snape smiled. Seemingly she, too, was relieved to see a known face. "Mr Evans," she said. "How pleasant to meet you. You´re bringing your daughters, I assume?"

"Only Lily. Petunia isn´t a witch. Ah, and there´s young Severus. I take it, he is a wizard?"

"He is..."

"It came so much as a surprise to us, when Lily got her letter. She´s the first witch in our family."

"I wasn´t surprised. Seeing that I´m a witch, I was well aware of the fact that my son would possibly be a wizard."

"Do you need help with his trunk? He can sit here with Lily."

"Thank you so much, Mr Evans. I´m relieved he can sit with your daughter, to be honest. He doesn´t make friends easily."

"They´ll both be better off, if they can start together." Mr Evans heaved the second trunk into the compartment.

"Ah, Lily, dear." he beamed at his daughter, who had finally managed to come to him. "Look, whom I have met." He pointed at the small, darkhaired boy, who stood quietly beside his mother. "You´d never have guessed that one of your old class would be here, would you?"

Lily smiled at the boy. He returned the smile shyly. Their mothers greeted as well.

The steam engine gave a loud whistle. "We´d better be off," said Mrs Snape. "This is the signal that the train will leave in a minute. Have you everything you need?" She bent to her son and cleared a fluff from his shirt. The boy nodded.

The Evans said good bye to their daughter and ensured her once again they´d give her greetings and apology to her sister.

When the train started to move, the two children waved to their parents until the train went around a bend and the platform couldn´t be seen any longer.

-x-

The boy closed the window with some difficulty. He barely reached up to it, but at last he managed. There were some moments of silence.

"You don´t have to sit with me if you don´t want to. I can go somewhere else." the boy said at last.

"Oh, no. Why should I not want to sit with you?" Lily smiled. "So, your mother is a witch? Do you know any magic?"

"A bit."

Lily waited for him to elaborate, but he didn´t. "What is it like to live with magical parents?" she finally asked.

The boy hesitated. "My parents aren´t both magical," he said at last. "My dad is a muggle."

"He must be proud to have a wizard son."

"He is not. He doesn´t like magic. My mom kept telling him, that I probably wouldn´t be a wizard. He got a fit, when I got my letter."

"Sorry to hear that. But you knew before, that you were a wizard..."

"My mum told me, when I was five. She said, I had to be careful around dad. She said, he´d find out early enough." They remained silent for a while. Then the boy asked: "When did you find out you´re a witch?"

"When my letter arrived. I was kind of relieved. It explained a lot."

"Has this anything to do with your sister? What did you do to her?"

Now it was Lily´s turn to hesitate. She was ashamed. But the boy had told her about his father. He deserved an answer.

"When my sister and I were smaller, we often quarreled about toys. She refused to lend me hers." Lily sighed. "I told her, that if I wasn´t to play with them, she wasn´t either. The toys just disappeared before our eyes."

The boy stared at her with a lack of comprehension. She had to elaborate. "I made her toys disappear, because she wouldn´t let me play with them. When she told our parents, they didn´t believe her. She got told off for being a liar so often. And I didn´t know, I did it. How could I, I´m the first witch in the family." There was a pause. "Would you like a sandwich?"

The boy nodded. Lily put a napkin on one of the empty seats and laid some sandwiches from her bag on it. "If you´ve got a knife, we can share the apple, too." The boy hadn´t got a knife but a wand. Lily stared at him in admiration. The boy smiled and put a bottle of orange liquid on the napkin. "Would you like some pumpkin juice?" he asked.

"I never tried pumpkin juice."

"It´s time, you did." He held out the bottle.

Lily took it and tried a sip. It was delicious. "Thank you...Severus."

"No problem. You´re welcome...Lily."

-x-

After their little picnic, they continued their conversation. Lily wanted to know everything about the magical world and Severus was willing to tell her what he knew.

"A hat? Are you serious?" Lily was just saying when the compartment door was opened.

"In fact, I am. But how come you know?" said a tall, darkhaired boy at the door.

Lily and Severus stared at him. "What?"

"I am Sirius. Never mind. We´re having a party over there in our compartment and we could do with some ladies." A second boy who stood behind him nodded in agreement. "What about it, redcap, wanna come?"

"No thank you. I´d rather think not. And close that door when you´re leaving."

The boy shrugged and left.

"What an idiot. And did you see that second one? Are they twins?"

"No, just both darkhaired, I think. Or would you think, I´m their little brother?"

Lily giggled. "At least, we´d be sure who in the family got the brains."

Severus giggled too. This was the first time a joke was made in his presence and he was not the target.

-x-

Time rushed by and soon it was getting dark outside. An older student came and told them to change into robes.

When the train pulled into the station of a small town called Hogsmead, they were advised to leave their luggage on the train. Lily and Severus got off the train together. Severus pointed out a huge man, who was shouting "Firstyears over here!" The two made their way towards him, where quite a crowd of children had already gathered.

The older students left the platform towards a fleet of horseless carriages but the firstyears were led by the giant down a path to a big lake. There were some dozens of small boats waiting for them.

"Four to each boat" the giant instructed. Lily and Severus chose a boat on the left.

"Hi, redcap," a familiar voice said and the "twins" took the remaining seats in their boat. "We haven´t been properly introduced. I´m Sirius Black and this is my friend James Potter." He pointed at the latter.

"Lily Evans. And this is Severus Snape."

"Nice to meet you, Lily. Severus." The two boys smiled at Lily, but looked at Severus in dislike.

The boats moved off the shore and after a short while they got their first view of Hogwarts. The water was calm and the castle´s thousand lights were reflected in the lake. "It´s magic!" whispered Lily.

"Of course, it is. It´s a wizarding school." laughed Black.

Lily glared at him. Suddenly the quiet surface of the lake was disturbed by a huge tentacle and the boat rocked. Lily nearly lost her balance. Without thinking, she grabbed Severus´s arm. The boy took her second hand and held it until the boat stopped rocking. "Are you OK?" he asked. "Yes, thank you," Lily smiled gratefully.

The Potter boy joined the conversation for the first time. "Now, now," he sneered. "What a nice little couple we have found."

-x-

Severus would have hit him, but Lily shook her head. "Leave it, you´ll be in trouble before we even reach the castle. He´s not worth it."

Severus tried to calm down and glared at Potter, who opened his mouth to comment. "Don´t you dare," fumed Lily. "Just hold your tongue, you evil, little..." Potter never learned what he was in Lily´s opinion, for the boats had reached their goal and the giant ordered them to get off.

"Follow me," the giant cried and started mounting a narrow, slippery staircase.

After what seemed like ages to Lily, they reached a door and were let into the castle. Behind the door waited an elderly witch, who was wearing her hair in a bun and a green pointed witch´s hat. "Here they are, professor," reported the giant and left.

The witch cleared her throat. "I am Professor McGonagall. Welcome to Hogwarts."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: The Sorting

"Before you can join the other students for the feast," said Professor McGonagall, "you need to be sorted into your houses. There are four houses, each of which promotes the qualities and gifts that are characteristic to its members. There are Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin. While you are here, your house will be your family. Your work will earn your house points, your rulebreaking will lose your house points. At the end of the year, the house with most points will be awarded the house cup. Now, follow me, please."

She led them through a huge pair of oak doors to a great hall. The inside was crowded with teenagers in school robes, who were divided to four tables. "One for each house." whispered Severus. At the front wall there was a fifth table, where a group of adults waited. "The teachers," Lily assumed. Severus nodded.

"I hope, we are in the same house." Severus whispered, as they lined up with the other firstyears in front of the older students. Lily smiled and gripped his hand for a second.

Professor McGonagall pointed at an old wizard´s hat on a threelegged stool. "This is the Sorting Hat. When I call your name, you´ll sit on the stool and put the hat on. It will tell us, in which house you belong. But first we´ll listen to the hat."

The hat seemingly had only waited for its cue and burst into song. Lily didn´t pay attention to what the hat said. She was looking around the hall trying to take in every detail.

When the hat had finished its song, professor McGonagall stepped forward. She unfurled a roll of parchment and began reading out names. Lily watched the sorting with interest, as she would be sorted herself soon. The first student, whose name she knew, to be sorted was Sirius Black. When the hat cried "Gryffindor" the hall burst into murmuring. Lily tried to catch, what all this was about. Finally she heard a man behind her say "But Albus, he´s a Black! All Blacks go into Slytherin!"

McGonagall bade for silence and the murmuring died. Sirius Black put the hat back on the stool and went over to the Gryffindor table. The sorting went on and soon McGonagall called "Lily Evans". Lily went over and put on the hat.

"Hello, dear!" a small voice said in her thoughts. "How was your journey?"

"Nice," her thoughts answered. "I found a new friend."

"Nothing to complain about?"

"Well, there was a little agitation with an idiot boy, but we handled it all right."

"You´re not the type to run from trouble, are you, dear?"the voice said. "So you should be GRYFFINDOR!"

Lily realized that the hat had cried out the last word to the hall. So she was to be in Gryffindor. She put the hat back on the stool and went to the Gryffindor table, where she was warmly welcomed by the older house members. She chose to sit rather opposite Sirius Black than beside him.

-x-

"What are you keeping this seat free for?" asked Black after a while. "You don´t think Snape will be in Gryffindor?"

"Why not?" Lily glared at Black.

"Oh, come on. The guy lets a girl fight his battles. He never could be a Gryffindor. Gryffindors are brave."

"Severus is brave."

"Brave enough to hide behind you."

"I don´t know what you´re talking about!"

"In that boat. He was only too relieved you wouldn´t let him fight James."

"He was reasonable."

"He´s a coward!"

"How dare you..."

"Not fighting again, the two of you." James Potter had been made a Gryffindor during their exchange and took the seat beside Black. "You are housemates now. Let´s have a fresh start, Evans." He offered his hand. After a short moment, Lily took it.

-x-

Lily was shaken. What if the hat put Severus in a different house? She was a little ashamed, that she hadn´t seen before, how nice he was. They had attended the same class for five years, but never before had they talked more than a short greeting. Severus had always been the outsider in the class. Lily and her girl friends had ignored him, like they did with most of the boys, but the boys hadn´t talked to him either. Some had made fun of him, sometimes even been cruel.

When Severus´s name was called, Lily crossed her fingers. "Please," she thought with all her power and hoped the hat would hear her, "please, make him a Gryffindor!"

The hat took a long time to consider. At last it cried "SLYTHERIN!".

Lily was dumbfounded. She had found a friend and hours later she´d lost him. Inside her a nagging feel of guilt occured. Would Severus be in Gryffindor, if she had let him fight Potter?

Black smirked at her.

-x-

"You see, he´s not brave." Black said and took a piece of roast chicken.

Lily´s fork stopped half way to her mouth. Carefully she put it back to her plate. "But you are, aren´t you."

"Of course. I´m in Gryffindor, see. Snape is evil and he is a coward. All the evil ones go to Slytherin."

"Is that, why all your family is there?" Lily glared over the table.

"Who told you..." Black rose to his feet.

"Sit down, Sirius," Potter hissed. "We don´t want a fight at the feast. We don´t want to lose points the first evening."

"You´re right, James. Besides, he is not worth it." Black sat down and continued eating.

Lily fumed. Several students had followed the exchange.

-x-

After the feast the headmaster, a tall wizard with long white hair and a long white beard in midnight blue robes rose to his feet and adressed the students.

"Welcome to our firstyears and welcome back to the rest of you." He smiled at the assembled students. "Before we all go to bed after this excellent feast, I have a few announcements to make. First I want to remind you, that the Forbidden Forrest is out of bounds for all students. Second Mr Filch asked me to point out to you, that magic is forbidden in the corridors. I wish you all a good night."

A blonde girl with a prefect badge attached to her robes came over to the firstyears. "Follow me, I´ll show you your dormitories." She led the way up to the seventh floor, where she showed them how to get past the painting of a fat lady to enter Gryffindor tower. In the Common room she explained, when they had to get up the next day, what to do if they got lost on their way to breakfast and at last, where their dormitories were.

Lily had to share her room with four other girls. Three of them were blondes, but one had brown hair. "Hi, I´m Myra Bones," the brown-haired introduced herself. "Did you have problems with the Black-boy?"

"I´m Lily Evans. I met Black on the train. He´s not nice." Lily sighed.

"I wouldn´t expect him to be. He´s a Black. His whole family is as dark as their name. Weren´t you in his boat?"

"He was in mine. He came without invitation."

Myra nodded in understanding. "We better go to bed now. Tomorrow will be a hard day."

All five girls went to bed. Lily couldn´t sleep for a while. She kept thinking about Severus and hoped he was all right at Slytherin house.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Settling in

The five first year girls went down from Gryffindor tower to breakfast together. It took them some time to find their way, but they arrived at the Great Hall in time. Breakfast was as delicious and opulent as the feast the evening before. Lily just had her second goblet of pumpkin juice, when Severus entered the hall.

"Good morning, Severus!" she cried happily and waved. He smiled and waved back.

"What are you greeting that Slytherin for?" an older student asked suspiciously.

"Why shouldn´t I greet him?" asked Lily. "He´s my friend."

"Slytherins aren´t friends. Remember that." the other student said.

Lily nodded and remained silent. After a while she looked over at the Slytherin table. Obviously Severus was told off by older students for waving to her as well.

After breakfast professor McGonagall, who was the head of Gryffindor house, came to Lily and handed her her timetable. Some lessons were with other houses, only one with Slytherin. Lily smiled. At least she would see Severus every Wednesday in double potions.

-x-

Learning magic turned out to be rather difficult. As Lily was muggleborn, she had to start at the very beginning. Most of the other kids had seen the spells they were supposed to learn performed by their parents a hundred times. But Lily hadn´t.

"Maybe I´m not a witch at all," she sighed desperately.

Myra tried to comfort her. "You are a witch, they never make mistakes with that. You only need to find your start and everything will go well. Take my word on it."

They were sitting at the common room and practicing to turn matches into needles. Myra had managed to transfigure three matches. Two into pins and one into a sewing-needle. Lily was still working on her first match.

"Don´t you think it looks a little more peaked than before?" she asked.

"To be honest, no." It was Black, who had approached silently from behind. With a broad grin he presented a handful of pins he had produced.

Lily was miserable. "Well, Evans. It seems your magical powers can´t match your mouth." Black smirked at her.

Lily lost her temper. "You evil, little cockroach!" she fumed and without thinking she flicked her wand at her matches. They flew at Black in formation and turned into needles in the air. Black´s robes looked like a pin cushion.

"Well, that was a nice piece of magic," said a blonde prefect from a nearby armchair calmly. "Nevertheless, five points from Gryffindor, Evans. We don´t attack housemates."

She helped Black get rid of the needles and handed them to Lily. Black left for his dormitory. "See, you are a witch." smiled Myra. "And you owe Black for showing you how to start."

The two girls giggled.

Myra was right; after having started, things got easier.

-x-

The next day was potions with Slytherin. Lily was looking forward to it. Myra had told her about her aunt, who was saving lives with the potions she made at St. Mungo´s hospital. But first and foremost she was looking forward to seeing Severus.

The Slytherin students were already waiting in front of the classroom door, when Lily and Myra arrived. Severus was standing a little beside of the group, as he always had in elementary school. Lily smiled at him. He returned the smile shyly. Before either of them could say anything, the door opened and a fat wizard in black robes came out of the classroom.

"Hello, I´m professor Slughorn, your potions instructor." he said. "Come in, children, come in."

Lily took the seat beside Severus and Myra sat on her other side. "Severus, Myra." She introduced her two friends. The two nodded at each other. Professor Slughorn had started to read out the names of his new students. He lingered at some, asking about family members.

"He goes for the rich and the famous," whispered Myra to Lily. "You see, the Black family is very rich. And Greenspoon´s aunt is a famous singer." Being muggleborn, Lily never had heard of Amelia Greenspoon.

The first potions assignment was easy. Only five ingredients were required, and Lily had read the first chapters of her potions book in advance after her experiences with other subjects. This time she was going to have a good start. Potion making was a bit like cooking and she always had liked helping her mother in the kitchen.

Severus had his potion ready in a half hour. Lily finished minutes later.

"How was your week so far?" she whispered.

"Not bad!"

"I had problems with transfiguration, but I think, I solved them."

"Good to hear that!"

Someone cleared his throat beside them. They started, but it wasn´t the professor, a Slytherin boy was standing beside their table and staring at Severus. The boy shook his head. The rest of the lesson Severus didn´t answer any more.

Lily was confused. What was that about? At the end of the lesson, Severus slipped her a piece of parchment. "Meet me at the playground after supper."

-x-

When Lily came to the yard in the evening, Severus was already waiting. He stood in the shadows of the arcades and motioned her towards him. "Come here," he whispered. "We can´t be seen."

"Why can´t we be seen?"

"What happened the last time we were seen talking to each other? What happened every time we got in touch after the sorting?"

"Well, I got told off by other students..."

"So did I. We can´t be seen together."

"You don´t want to be friends any longer?"

"Of course I want to be your friend, we just can´t do it openly."

"Are you ashamed of our friendship?" Lily tried to see Severus´s face in the dark.

"No, it´s just..."

"It´s what?"

Severus didn´t answer. At last Lily grabbed his arm. "It´s what?" she insisted. "Ouch!" he tore away from her and rubbed his arm. "Did I hurt you? I didn´t mean to, please forgive me!" cried Lily.

"Sssshhhh!" he motioned her to be quiet. "You didn´t hurt me." he whispered.

"But you are hurt." Lily insisted. "Show me that arm!"

There was no way to escape her. She took his arm, rolled up his sleeve and examined it in a quickly lit Lumos! spell. The remains of a bruise were clearly visible. "Who did this?" she asked. She waited some seconds. "Was this done to you because we were talking?"

His silence told more than words could have.

"OK," said Lily. "We´ll keep it secret. I don´t want you to get hurt because of me. I´m sorry for blaming you."

"No harm done," Severus finally answered. "Are we still friends?"

"Of course, but we´d better go inside or they´ll miss us."

-x-

"You won´t believe it!" Lily told Myra later in the dormitory. "He has a bruise at his left forearm as big as my palm! They were beating him up at Slytherin house for talking to me!"

"You probably had bruises, too, if you weren´t a girl." Myra answered. "You have been told not to talk to a Slytherin several times, but you didn´t stop. Were you a boy, someone would have beaten you up by now as well."

"You really think so?"

"Don´t you notice the way some of the older students are looking at you? Not to mention Black and Potter."

Lily opened her mouth to answer, but the other girls came in, and she said nothing.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Christmas break

The rest of the term was consumed by homework and studies. Lily had to work hard and little time to think of anything else. She kept her promise to Severus and avoided talking to him in public. They exchanged small notes in potions saying that everything was OK and glances and smiles when they met in the corridors. So Lily was astonished when Severus came to the Gryffindor table one morning at the beginning of December.

"This is for you," he said and held out a letter. "My mum sent it by owl for your parents." He spoke a touch too loud so that the others could hear that he had no choice about this conversation.

"Thank you." Lily took her letter and Severus returned to the Slytherin table. Some minutes later she followed him. "My dad writes, we´re giving you a lift from King´s Cross." Lily, too, made sure no student at the Slytherin table considered this a friendly conversation. Severus shrugged and Lily walked back to Myra.

-x-

"How did you do that?" asked Myra on their way to the Charms classroom.

"How did I do what?"

"Tell your parents to give him a lift. I never saw you write a letter."

"I didn´t. It was my dad´s idea. Though I´m glad about it. I´ll finally have a chance to speak to Severus in the car."

"Why is it so important for you to speak to him. You haven´t been friends for years, have you?"

"No, we haven´t. But I wish, we had. He´s really nice." They changed topic, when they reached the group of students already waiting in front of the classroom. "Where are you going during the holidays?"

"My aunt Rose invited us to France. I´m so looking forward to meeting my cousins."

-x-

The journey home turned out to be disappointing. Myra didn´t go to London on train as her father came to get her from Hogsmead and apparate directly to France.

On the Hogwarts express, Lily sat with the three other first year Gryffindor girls. They were talking about how cool Black and Potter were all the time. Lily wished she could sit with someone else. But as this would cause trouble for that certain someone, it was out of question.

At King´s Cross she was picked up by her parents and at last she was sitting in the back of her father´s car with Severus beside her. Instead of talking to him, she had to answer questions all way home. Especially her mother was so excited to have her back that she chatted all the time. She wanted to know everything: How are the teachers? (Nice.) Have you found new friends? (Yes. Lily and Severus smiled at each other.) Have you learned some magic by now? (Yes.) Do you get enough to eat? (Yes.) and so on and so on.

When Mr Evans´ car stopped in front of the Snape house, Lily got out, too, to say good bye to Severus.

"I´ll be at the park tomorrow. If you´d like to come..."

Lily shook her head. "Sorry, my grandmother will come. I´m not sure I can make it."

"Never mind. I´m at the park a lot. Perhaps another day."

"I´ll come as soon as I can." They shook hands.

-x-

Back in the car Lily finally asked the question, which had been lying on her soul like a rock. "What about Petunia? Did she forgive me?"

Her mother turned around in the front seat to face her younger daughter. "I´m afraid no, dear. She even refused to come to London."

"I was hoping, she stayed at home to make room for Severus."

"Well, she said,..."

"She said what, mum?"

"She said," Mrs Evans hesitated. How tell your child that her sister declines her? "that she wouldn´t come for you, and if we were to take a second of your pack, the more reason for her to stay at home. I´m sorry, dear."

"Does granny know? I mean, did you tell her, what I am?"

"Of course. And she´s as proud as we are! Look, there she is!"

Indeed, Lily´s grandmother, her father´s mother was waiting in the gateway. She waved and as soon as Lily got out of the car hugged her.

"Oh, my little darling! How are you?" she cried. "I always knew you were special!" She whispered still hugging her granddaughter and stroking her long red hair.

-x-

Petunia was in the kitchen. When Lily entered the room, she got up from her chair and left. "Petunia!" Lily called after her older sister. "Petunia, please talk to me!" The only answer was the clap of Petunia´s door. Lily went upstairs and knocked.

"Petunia! You can´t ignore me forever!"

No answer.

"Petunia! Please! I´m sorry! I didn´t know I did it. I had no control! Please open that door!"

The door was opened abruptly. Petunia, tall, slender and blonde, stood before her. "What are you going to do, if I don´t? Let it disappear?" She slammed the door closed.

"Of course not! I´m going to Hogwarts to learn control it. I´m sure I won´t let any of your things disappear any more!"

The door opened again. "Talk to me, when you learnt how to let them turn up again." With another slam Petunia withdrew into her room. Lily went to her own room and sobbed.

-x-

The situation didn´t improve. Parents and grandmother tried to get Petunia back on speaking terms with her sister but she refused. Lily met her only for the meals at the table but on that occasions conversation was restricted to remarks like "Pass the salt!". The adults tried to break the silence by chatting about Lily´s school, but Petunia seemed to regard their interest in the wizarding world as a personal insult.

The next days held more disappointment. Lily was invited by Laura, her best friend at elementary school. She came back frustrated and sad.

"What happened, dear?" her grandmother asked putting a steaming cup of cocoa in front of the girl.

"Lindsay was there and Katie and Laura. They are all attending the same school. They chatted about classes and their friends."

"Oh," Granny nodded in understanding. "And you were not part of it."

"I wasn´t. But what´s the worst, they asked about my school and friends and I couldn´t tell them anything. I´m not allowed to."

"You could have told them about your friends."

"I tried. But I can´t tell them that Myra makes me laugh, when she sends sparks through the classroom instead of levitating a book."

Mrs Evans giggled. "Sparks through the classroom. Is she doing that?"

"Yes, all the time. Her dad says, they should have named her Magpie, for she has an affinity to the glittering and shiny." They laughed.

"Why don´t you meet that little wizard, child? Your dad said, there´s one living in the other street. There´d be no need to keep those things secret from him. He´s of your kind."

Lily wiped a tear from her cheek. "You´re right, I´ll do that." She got up from her chair.

"Not now, dear!" Granny laughed. "It´s already getting dark outside. Tomorrow, child. Tomorrow will be another day."

-x-

The next day turned out to be stormy and cold. Lily decided to stay inside. There was no way Severus would be at the park in that weather. Nobody would. She spent the morning reading in her room. On second view some of her school books were very interesting. Especially the Charms text held plenty of treasures. Lily found it difficult not to take her wand and try some of the spells.

Lunch was pleasant. Mrs Evans had prepared some of Lily´s favorite dishes, among them chocolate pudding. As Petunia liked that, too, she was rather good-humored. She even said "please", when she asked Lily for the wiped cream. Things changed rapidly, when Granny tried to make a conversation.

"Lily, dear, what were you doing all morning in your room."

"Reading my school books, Granny."

"Did you, indeed. What a busy student you are, dear. What did you learn?"

Lily glanced from her mother to her grandmother. Petunia wouldn´t like the answer. Both beamed at her in pride and anticipation.

"I found a charm to make a cup tapdance." Lily finally said in a small voice.

"Really? Can you..." Granny didn´t get further, as Petunia jumped from her chair and stomped from the room.

"Sorry."

"It´s not your fault, dear."

Though everybody assured her, that it was not her fault, the atmosphere was tense at the Evans´ home. Nobody tried to stop her, when Lily made known, she was going out. Wearing a green cap, gloves and scarf, Lily strolled towards the park. When she approached the playground, she spotted a small person on the swing.

-x-

It was Severus. He wore a thin black coat, no scarf, cap or gloves. His fingers were red with cold.

"Hi," Lily greeted him. "Aren´t you freezing?"

"No."

"Don´t you lie to me. I don´t like that."

"OK. My fingers are freezing, but the rest of me is OK."

Lily sat on the other swing and offered him her gloves.

"You keep them, you´ll need them yourself."

"You take them. We can wear them in turn." He accepted the offer. "What are you doing here? I wasn´t expecting to meet you here in this weather. Are your fingers better?"

"My mum said, I needed fresh air."

"Fresh air? You´re telling stories."

Severus sighed. "See, my dad doesn´t like magic and since he learned, that I´m a wizard..."

"Yes?"

"...he´s a bit difficult."

"Difficult?"

"You´re not making this easy. My mum and he are shouting most of the time. It´s worse, when I´m around for sooner or later he´s going to complain about the wizard´s brat."

"Oh, I´m sorry."

"It´s not your fault. You take the gloves for a while."

They swung for a while in silence. It was Severus to break it. "How are things going at your home?"

"Badly. My sister won´t talk to me. She leaves the room, whenever magic is mentioned. It´s annoying."

"I´m sorry."

"It´s not your fault."

The stayed on the swings for quite a while, passing the gloves from time to time. When it grew dark, they set out for home. "Same time, same place, tomorrow?" Lily asked. Severus nodded.

-x-

The next day was sunny, but icy cold. Lily spent the morning in her room again. From downstairs she heard the happy laughter of her mother and sister. There was a soft knock at the door and her grandmother entered.

"Why don´t you come downstairs, dear?" she asked softly.

"Don´t want to."

"Of course you want to! We´re baking cookies with walnuts. I know you love them."

"Petunia loves them, too. If I come, she´ll go. I don´t want to spoil this for her. I´ve done enough..."

"It was not your fault. You didn´t know."

"She won´t forgive me."

"As won´t you."

"I´ll come to lunch."

-x-

Lily slipped out of the house right after the meal. Her friend was already waiting at the swings.

"For how long have you been sitting here?"

"Don´t know. What´s the time?"

"Past one."

"Four hours."

"You can´t be serious." A glance at his reddened fingers told that he was. Lily handed Severus her gloves.

"Have you eaten?"

"Breakfast." Severus looked miserable.

"Here," Lily produced a napkin with two walnut cookies from the pocket of her coat. "You have them both, I just had lunch."

The boy wolfed the first cookie down. "They´re delicious. Did you make them?"

"No, mum and Petunia did."

"You didn´t help?" he took a small bite of the second.

Lily shook her head.

"Wouldn´t they let you?"

"I didn´t want to spoil it for my sister. She feels uncomfortable when I´m around. She even hates the word magic."

Another bite from the cookie. "Just like my dad. I left my charms book on the table yesterday. He was so upset when he found it. He got a fit. Mum sent me outside and told me not to come back before nightfall." Severus put the last crumb of the cookie into his mouth. "Thanks for feeding me." He smiled.

"I´d have brought more, had I known..."

"Never mind, it was more than I had before." He got up from his swing. "You want me to push you?" he offered.

"Yes, please!"

Soon Lily was swinging higher than ever before. Her long red hair flew like a veil behind her. She laughed and enjoyed herself. "This is like flying!" she cried happily. "Do you like flying, Severus?"

He stopped pushing. "No."

"Why? I enjoyed our flying lessons."

He sighed. "You saw me. I´m not good on a broom."

Lily stopped her swing and turned round to face him. "You won´t end up as a Quidditch player but you were not bad. It´s because you usually excel in classes. You expect too much of yourself."

"Maybe."

"You´re exhausted. Look at you. Your hair is all wet. You´ll catch a cold!"

"I´m OK."

"We have to get you inside."

"No, really, I´m OK."

"You are shivering!"

"I can´t go home, it´s too early."

"It´s not too early to go to my house." She jumped from the swing and set out for home. "What are you waiting for? Come!"

Severus recognized an order. Slowly he trotted after Lily.

"What about your parents? What will they say, when you bring me along?"

"Welcome?"

"And your sister? She´ll feel uncomfortable with me."

"Petunia will stand an afternoon of discomfort to spare you a pneumonia. Just don´t talk about magic, when she´s in the room."

"OK. I shall remember not to."

-x-

It was neither Petunia nor her parents who answered the door. It was Lily´s grandmother.

"Oh, what a pity you didn´t come earlier. Your parents and Petunia went shopping to London. Your sister needs some school things. You´ve missed them by minutes." Granny looked sorry.

"Can we have some cocoa?" Lily asked. "We´re cold."

It was only now, that Granny realized that Lily was not alone.

"But of course, dear." She smiled. "Is this...?" She paused.

"This is Severus," Lily made the introductions. "The wizard, who lives nearby. Severus, this is my grandmother."

"Good day, Mrs Evans." Severus said politely and shook the offered hand. "Thank you for having me here."

"You´re welcome, child. Now, come in the two of you and sit down. I´ll make some cocoa. Or would you prefer tea, Severus?"

"Cocoa would be fine. Thank you."

They took off their coats and Severus gave Lily her gloves back. Lily took Severus to the living room and soon her grandmother brought a tray with three steaming mugs of cocoa and a plate with cookies. She sat in an armchair, while the two children sat on the sofa.

"So, you are one of Lily´s classmates, I understand?"

"I´m in her year, but we are in different houses. We only have potions together." Severus helped himself to a cookie.

"Oh, so you won´t see too much of each other at school."

"No," both children answered in unison. Granny glanced from one face to the other.

"There´s more about that, isn´t there?" she finally asked.

Severus took another sip of cocoa. Lily bit her lip.

"Lily? What is it, dear?"

"Our houses..." Lily hesitated and glanced at Severus as if looking for advice.

"If you can´t tell your grandmother, you can´t tell anybody." He said and took another bite of a cookie.

"Our houses have been rivals for centuries." Lily sighed. "We can´t even talk to each other without being told off by our house mates."

Granny smiled. "But this doesn´t keep you from being friends."

"No!" bot children reassured her. "It´s difficult to have a friend nearby and not be able to talk to him, though," Lily added.

"It certainly is," her grandmother said commiseratingly. "But friendship is not a matter of how often you see each other or talk to each other. In fact, I have a very good friend, whom I´ve never met in my life!"

"How is this possible?"

"She´s my penfriend. We have been writing to each other for nearly sixty years. It started when we both were at school and it never stopped."

"Really?"

"Really."

"But I can´t be penfriends with Severus!"

"Why not? You can write letters while you´re at school and meet when you´re at home."

"I want to talk to him at Hogwarts, too!"

"It wouldn´t work anyway," said Severus and reached for the last cookie. "Wizards send letters by owl. There would be an uproar, if owls flew directly from the Slytherin table to Gryffindor."

"So you have to find other means of communication." Granny stated matter-of-factly. "And now I´ll get us some sandwiches. You seem hungry, dear." She got up and took the empty cookie plate.

Severus blushed.

"No need to be embarrassed, there´s no shame in being hungry." The old woman said cheerfully and left for the kitchen.

-x-

When she came back with a large platter of sandwiches twenty minutes later, Lily and Severus had started to work out a sign language. Scratching one´s left ear was to mean "Are you OK?" to say "yes" you had to scratch your left ear, too.

They had some sandwiches and continued developing signs. Soon all three were rather giggly.

-x-

Mr and Mrs Evans returned from London with their elder daughter some hours later to find their daughter and her grandmother laughing as young Severus said very solemnly "No, seriously, we can´t use wand movements. We don´t want to curse anybody by accident."

"Just imagine," Granny gasped between two fits of laughter, "You want to exchange remarks on the quality of your dessert and end up giving somebody an extra nose!"

Severus smiled. "Are you sure, you aren´t a witch, Mrs Evans?"

"Oh, hello," Mr Evans cried from the door. "It seems, we have a visitor, and an amusing one, I guess."

Severus rose to his feet and went to greet the Evans family. Petunia retreated to her room rather than shake his hand.

As it was already growing dark outside, Severus left shortly afterwards.

-x-

Lily went to the park every day for the rest of the Christmas break. She spent happy hours there, discussing magic with Severus and refining their sign language. They even started to practice magic.

"I see no reason, " Lily said, "why they´d forbid practicing wand movements with a pencil."

Severus gave it a thought. "You are right. We are not doing magic. We are waving a pencil."

They looked for a quiet place to practice. "We don´t want our discussions about magic overheard." Lily said. Severus agreed.

They found a spot near the wall, which separated the park from the street.

Lily tried a complicated movement, she had found in her charms book. Severus was to be her tutor as his mother had taught him this particular spell more than a year ago. He explained, what she did wrong and showed her how it had to be done. They were so absorbed in their work, that neither of them noticed that they were observed.

"Are you bewitching him, little one?" an old man asked. The two children started. "You won´t need a wand," the old man continued kindly. "Those startling green eyes of yours will do the trick." He smiled at them and strolled towards the duck pond.

Lily looked after him, bewildered. "What would I want to bewitch you for?"

Severus shrugged. "Don´t know. Show me that last flick again."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: A loss and a discovery

Life became more pleasant at Hogwarts after the Christmas break. Lily developed an aptitude for charms, it soon became her best subject. Practicing with Severus had paid off. As she needed less time for her charms homework, Lily had more time for her other subjects and improved at each.

Myra had brought an assortment of French sweets. They spent hours at the common room sampling bon-bons, telling stories and giggling.

What was best in Lily´s eyes, was that the sign language worked. It wasn´t suited for long conversations, but they were able to exchange short messages frequently. "Are you OK?" – "Have you got a lot of homework?" It was not much, but Lily was confident, they could improve it the next break and at least they were in touch.

One Saturday morning at the end of February a barn owl came to Lily at the breakfast table. Lily was astonished. She never got post. Her family usually asked Mrs Snape to send letters for them and she usually sent them in a big envelope with one of Severus´s letters. The owl stretched out its leg and Lily took her letter. She opened it and started reading. After a few lines she got up and left the Great Hall as quickly as possible.

Severus waited two minutes before he followed her as fast as he could without arousing suspicion. He nearly ran into Black and Potter at the door.

He found her at the trophy room, the emergency meeting point they had stipulated. Lily sat on the floor, resting her back against one of the huge glass cases. Her letter lay beside her, she was crying.

Severus sat beside her. "What is it?" he asked.

"It´s Granny, she had a stroke."

"How bad is it?"

"Oh, Severus, she´s dead!" Lily fell on his neck and started sobbing uncontrolledly.

"I´m so sorry, she was very nice." He put an arm around her shoulder.

Lily was shaking with sobs. Severus tried to calm her down, but gave up after a few attempts and just held the crying girl. After a half hour she let go of him and wiped her tears.

"I´m sorry. Your robes are all wet." She sniffed. "Do you know a spell to dry them?"

He shook his head. "Never mind, they´ll dry soon. Are you OK?"

"I don´t know how to get to the funeral. The Hogwarts Express won´t be an option, will it? How do students get home during the school year?"

"If your parents are magical, they´ll take you on side along apparition, I guess."

"My parents aren´t magical, as you very well know!"

"Ask the headmaster or your head of house. They´ll know!"

"You´re right, I´ll go to professor McGonagall at once. She´ll know what to do. Thank you for your advice. And thank you for comforting me." She managed a small smile.

"You´re welcome. Now go. I´ll wait some minutes, we don´t want to be seen together."

Lily nodded and left. Severus leaned against the glass case and tried to get his robes into a respectable state. He didn´t look up, when the door opened.

"What did you do to her, Slytherin?" asked James Potter. "Why was she crying?"

"You make a Gryffindor cry, you pay," added Sirius Black.

-x-

The next day Lily was taken home to her family by Minerva McGonagall herself. The professor had changed her tartan robes to a muggle suit and coat. Lily went beside her to Hogsmead and was taken from there home via side by side apparition. She stayed with her family for nearly a week.

When she returned to the school, she was still sad and more quiet than usual. Myra told her, what they´d learned in her absence and Lily set to work to catch up.

The next day at breakfast she noticed two things. Severus seemed to be limping, but when she scratched her left ear, he scratched his in return. James Potter missed an eyebrow. Lily had no time to ponder, if this was an coincidence. She still needed a total of twelve rolls of parchment to catch up with homework.

-x-

Easter was early this year. Lily could hardly wait to get away from school. Again Mr Evans and Mrs Snape had agreed, that it would be a waste of time and money to go for the children in two cars, so Lily and Severus sat at the back of Mr Evans´ car once more.

"Lily told us, you took care of her, when her grandmother died," said Lily´s father and looked at Severus in the rear-view mirror. "That was very kind of you."

"That´s what friends are for."

"Right you are, young man. It´s good to know, that our daughter has a good friend at that school. We were so much concerned about her."

"So was I."

"So tell me, the two of you. Are you doing well at school? You are studying hard, aren´t you?"

"Of course, dad. We´ll do well at the exams." Lily smiled and Severus nodded in agreement.

"Severus, why don´t you come over to our house tomorrow afternoon? I´m sure, my wife wants to thank you, too."

"Will it be OK with Petunia, if I come?"

"It has to be. You are her sister´s best friend. As her friends are coming to our house from time to time, she can´t deny this right to her sister´s. You´ll be welcome."

-x-

Severus called the next afternoon as he had been told to. Mrs Evans welcomed him warmly and thanked him for comforting her daughter. Petunia shook his hand this time, but made an apology to go to her room as soon as it would be considered only impolite, not offensive.

Lily seemed excited about something, but Severus didn´t dare ask her. He had the feeling, whatever it was, she didn´t want to discuss it in her mother´s presence.

After about an hour Lily said "Is it OK, if we go to my room, mum? We have to discuss homework." and drew him upstairs after her as soon as her mother gave permission. She closed the door and beamed at him conspiratorily.

"Look!" she whispered and her eyes glittered. She held out a small bottle.

"What is this?" Severus gazed at the bottle. He´d rather had a look at Lily´s room, but he understood he was expected to examine the bottle.

"A cough-syrup."

"What´s special about that?"

"My mum made it. An old family recipe, she says. Now smell it."

Severus took the bottle, removed the stopper and sniffed.

"This smells like the cough-syrup we made in potions."

"This is the cough-syrup we made in potions. Same ingredients, same order in adding them. I asked her."

"How is this possible? Is your mother..." Severus was bewildered.

"No, I´m sure she isn´t. But potions have been brewed in this house and the ministry didn´t detect it."

"If she isn´t a witch, this can´t be a proper potion."

"Let´s have a closer look. You wait here." Lily bolted downstairs and returned with a spoon in an instant. She took the bottle and put some of it´s contents on the spoon. "It´s a different color, a bit brighter than it should be."

"It also seems to be a touch too thin. But you´re right, it smells exactly like the potion." Severus offered his opinion. "Are you sure about the ingredients?"

Lily nodded. "I asked her. And I asked about the order of adding them. It´s the same. So why is this different." She put the bottle down on her desk and dipped a finger into the small amount of syrup on the spoon. Carefully she licked the fingertip. "It tastes better than the potion we made."

"Are you sure?" Severus took a sample himself. "It´s sweeter. Did she add sugar?"

"I don´t think so, we´ll have to ask her."

-x-

They went to the kitchen, where Mrs Evans was preparing supper.

"Mum, could you show us how to make this cough-syrup? We could use it for our homework." Lily asked.

Mrs Evans agreed at once to do it. "I´d never have guessed I could help with anything you need for your school. I´ll gladly make some syrup tomorrow. We are short of it anyway."

"Can we make it in the afternoon? Severus would like to watch, too."

"Of course, dear. We´ll do the shopping in the morning and the cooking in the afternoon."

"Thank you, mum." Lily took Severus by his sleeve and they went back to her room, where they started immediately to work out an observation schedule.

"You´ll have to note down, which ingredients she gets. Ask her, if she has special criteria what to buy." Severus suggested.

Lily noted it down. "We have to note down the order of adding things and when she adds them."

"As well as how she cooks it. You know, temperature and length of time."

By nightfall they had worked out by a dozen of questions concerning the making of the cough-syrup.

"I´ll ask my mother about the potion brewing and if it´s considered magic." Severus said before he left for his own home.

-x-

The next morning Mrs Evans took Lily to several shops to get ingredients for the syrup, most of them herbs. When they returned home, they picked some thyme from their own garden. "My mother told me, the syrup was better, if you had all herbs picked fresh from your own patches," she lectured, "but you know, I´m not good at gardening." Lily noted everything down.

Severus came after lunch and Mrs Evans started the actual making of the cough-syrup. The two children followed every move she made with attentiveness and took notes. When the final bottle was filled and stoppered, she beamed at them. "You see, it´s very easy."

"Thank you, mum. We´ll go upstairs and start with our essays."

"You won´t copy from each other?" Mrs Evans suddenly looked strict.

"Of course not, Mrs Evans. The professor would notice." Severus assured her.

-x-

Up in Lily´s room the girl opened her potions book on the page with the cough potion. The two children started comparing the potions recipe with their notes from the kitchen. They spent more than two hours tabulating the differences and similarities.

"This is interesting," Severus finally said. "Temperatur seems to be important. And for how long you cook it."

"What surprises me, is that the way of stiring seems to be important, too." added Lily.

Severus bit his lip. "The two ways of using the ingredients differ in too many parameters. We can´t know how strong the influence of one particular is."

"We´d need to experiment. Make two samples and change only one parameter."

"We´d need more ingredients."

"We´d need more time. Easter break would be too short."

"Do we have a summer project?"

"I suppose so. This could be fun. But we have to plan it carefully."

"So lets do the planning now and the brewing in summer."

"OK. – By the way, did you talk to your mother?"

"Yes."

"Come on, don´t let me ask for every detail! What did she say?"

"She got a fit of laughter. She said, as we´re too young for wandless magic, nothing we do will be considered magic as long we´re not using a wand."

"So, then it´s clear. We can start a potions workshop in summer."

"You´re right. We can practice potion making at home. This will be fun."

"Let´s make some plans how to do it and where to get the ingredients."

-x-

"Mum, dad, is it OK, if I lay out a herb patch in the garden?" Lily asked at supper. "We could use the herbs for our potions homework and buying the seeds is cheaper than buying the herbs."

The Evans were pleased to be able to help. Mrs Evans promised to show Lily were she could put her herbs and Mr Evans offered to take her and Severus to the market-garden to purchase seeds.

By the end of Easter break a brandnew herb patch was part of the Evans´ garden. Mrs Evans promised to water it in case of drought, but knowing her mother´s poor gardening skills, Lily had chosen easily satisfied plants.

-x-

Lily returned to Hogwarts with renewed motivation. Soon she and Myra were busy studying for the final exams. The only annoying thing was, that Black and Potter had made friends with two other firstyears, Pettigrew and Lupin. While Black and Potter had been irritating, the gang of four was an affront. They were noisy and obtrusive, forcing their jokes – or what they regarded to be funny – on people, Black always in the lead. Studying in the common room was nearly impossible, when they were around.

"I don´t know," Lily slammed her book closed, "why we have to stand them. Come, let´s go up to the dormitory or I´ll go crazy."

Myra collected her things and the two girls went upstairs. "Really," Lily went on, "why don´t the older students stop them? Or the prefects? They are disturbing everybody who wants to study!"

"Yesterday they poured ink over Kassandra´s half finished potions essay. It took her two hours to rewrite it. Eloise says, she cried."

"Oh no, these four are such terrible trouble-makers! Don´t they have to study themselves?"

"Well, Black and Potter seem to be gifted and powerful. They excel in classes as you know very well. Lupin is hardworking and now he has friends to help him. His assignments won´t take him much time. And Pettigrew..."

"What about Pettigrew?"

"Oh, come on, you know him. If he´s told troublemaking is more important than homework, he´ll believe it, that slimy little boy. He´s been trying to make friends with whom he considers the cool boys the whole year and finally he succeeded. He must feel very happy."

The two girls sat on Myra´s bed and continued reviewing transfiguration.

-x-

Exam time came quickly and passed fast. As Lily had worked hard, she did very well in all subjects. Having done some extra work at home, her best were Charms and Potions. Pleased with herself she put her results into her trunk. Her parents would be proud of her. The next day she and the other students left Hogwarts for the summer holidays.

The journey on the Hogwarts express was not as pleasant as it could have been as Black and his group were celebrating the end of the school year with some practical jokes. But at least this time Myra took the train to London, so Lily had a friend to sit with.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Potion brewing

Lily and Severus started their potions workshop the first day after their return home. They started with an an inventory of Lily´s herb patch. The weather had been ideal, so Mrs Evans lack of talent with gardening hadn´t done any harm to the plants and they were to have a rich harvest. Severus made a schedule, when to pick what, as some herbs needed the full moon to develop their maximum effect.

Soon Lily´s room held bunches of herbs suspended for drying. Their aroma was rich and heavy. Lily sat on her bed after the afternoon´s work, Severus at her desk. Between them stood a plate of sandwiches.

"We can start the actual brewing tomorrow." Lily stated between two bites.

Severus nodded and stretched to reach for another sandwich. His sleeve went up some centimeters as he did so. He shook his arm to get it back down, but it was too late.

"This is not another bruise, you´ve got? Show me that arm!"

"It´s nothing."

"Show me that arm!"

He stretched out his arm reluctantly and let her examine it.

"The other arm now!"

"What is this? An examination?"

"The other arm!"

He did, as she asked. He had bruises on both arms, slightly above his wrists.

"Who did that?"

"Nobody. An accident."

"Severus Snape, don´t you dare assume I´m an idiot! Someone held your arms with brute force. I want to know who it was! Now!" Lily was angry.

Severus put down his sandwich. "Look, I really don´t want to talk about it."

"Look, I really want to. I find out my friend has been hurt, I want to help."

"You can´t."

"I will find out who did this and he´ll have to answer me."

"NO!" Severus cried, jumping to his feet. The plate fell to the floor. "No." He bent and started picking up the sandwiches. "Just leave it. I don´t want you to interfere."

"You´ll have to explain why."

"I´ll give you my reasons if you promise to respect my wish."

"OK. I´m all ears."

"OK." Severus sat down, put the plate back on the desk and sighed. "I had a little difference of opinion with Black and Potter earlier this year. First it was with wands, but when they found out, I know some curses they don´t know, it became more of a fistfight."

Lily gasped. "Why didn´t you tell me?"

"You were with your family."

"Oh." For a moment the girl looked as if she was going to cry. "But these bruises are fresh." She said, when the moment was gone.

"We had some more encounters during summer term. Be reassured, I´m not the only one who got bruises. Usually I can deal with them well, but on the train..."

"What happened on the train?"

"There´s little room to manoevre. It´s a bigger disadvantage if you´re outnumbered than at Hogwarts. They wouldn´t let an opportunity pass." Severus said bitterly. "And now they are four."

Lily gasped. "Four on one? These cowards! I´ll..."

"You will do nothing. You promised."

"Tell me one thing. This difference of opinion, had it anything to do with me?"

"A little, but only in the beginning. It´s more personal now."

"Why don´t you want my help. They are four, you could use backup."

"Not from you."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You´re a girl. And you have to live at Gryffindor tower, where they have access but I haven´t. You´d be without backup there. If they knew, we were friends, I´d go crazy imagining what they´re doing to you when I can´t help."

"As you said, I´m a girl. They won´t touch me."

"Won´t they? You´d not expect them to fight four on one, would you?"

Lily´s eyes widened with fear. "You really think, they would hit me?"

"I don´t know for sure, and I don´t want to find out. You keep away from them."

"But I want to help. There must be something I can do."

"You keep our friendship secret. I know you care for me. That´s all I need." He took another sandwich.

-x-

They started their experiments the next day. They decided to find out about the influence of stiring first. Lily scanned her potions book for a recipe, which didn´t require a wand or ingredients but those they had.

"Sleeping draught?" asked Severus. "What for are we brewing a sleeping draught?"

"OK, go ahead," she shoved the book into his hands. "Find another one for which we have all ingredients. We can do some others when these," she pointed at some herbs suspended from her ceiling lamp, "are ready. But right now, this is the only one I found. Anyway, I thought we were going to explore potion making not start a potions shop."

Severus gave the book back. "No need to be upset. We can experiment with sleeping draught. By the way, a sleeping draught might be a moneymaker at a potions shop."

Still giggling, they took the herbs they needed and went to the kitchen. They spent the whole afternoon there, trying out different ways of stiring the potion and taking notes. Finally they filled the liquid into a small bottle and stoppered it.

"We can continue tomorrow," Lily sighed. "This was very interesting." Her cheeks were rosy with enthusiasm.

"No, dear, you can´t" interjected Mrs Evans. "This kitchen is for cooking meals. It´s OK, if you block it one afternoon, but I can´t have this every day." The two children looked disappointed. "Can´t this be done on a camping cooker?"

"I think so." Lily answered.

"It might be even better to use one," Severus added. "It will be more similar to the fires we use at school."

"So we´ll get you one. You can do your homework upstairs." Mrs Evans smiled.

"Thank you, mum!" Lily beamed.

-x-

The next two weeks the two friends spent every afternoon in Lily´s room. The smell of herbs and potions filled the whole Evans´ house. Finally it was too much for Mrs Evans.

"This is too much," she complained when she brought a platter of sandwiches and cakes. "This house needs some fresh air. And so do you. Clean up."

"But mum, we are not finished, yet."

"Your holidays are long enough. We all need a break from this stench. Sorry, dear, but this is my final word. Clean up."

The next day Severus didn´t come, nor did he the day after.

-x-

Lily was furious with her mother. "You drove him away!" she fumed. "I had one friend left here, and you drove him away!"

"You know, that I didn´t. I said, you weren´t to brew potions for a while. I never said, he wasn´t allowed to come."

"So, why isn´t he coming any more?"

"I don´t know. Why don´t you ask him? The Snape house is but five minutes walk from here. It would be fairly easy to find out, I assume."

-x-

The garden door was locked. Lily rang the bell and waited. After some minutes – Lily was just thinking of giving up and going home – Mrs Snape came to the fence.

"Good afternoon, Mrs Snape. Is Severus at home?"

"He is, but he is ill."

"Oh, I´m sorry to hear this. May I see him?"

"Sorry, dear. But this won´t be possible."

"Please, Mrs Snape, I won´t stay long. I just want to wish him a quick recovery. I´ll be gone in a minute."

Mrs Snape hesitated. "No," she finally said. "You can´t come in."

"Is it contagious? Oh, poor Severus!"

"No, it isn´t." She turned around on a hissing sound coming from the house door. "Please, wait a minute." She went back to the house and had a short discussion with a person inside.

"He says, he´ll come to see you in a week. And he asked me to thank you for coming." she informed Lily when she came back to the fence.

"So he has no contagious illness and he can walk around in the house. Please tell him, I won´t go before I´ve seen him."

Mrs Snape went back to the door and delivered the message. After a short moment of hesitation the door was opened and Severus came out. His mother touched his hair in support for a moment, then the boy went to the fence. Lily gasped. Severus´s left eye was black, his lower lip was scabbed.

"What on earth happened to you?"

"Let´s go to the park."

They trotted side by side in silence, Lily glancing at her friend from time to time. Severus led her to their hiding spot near the wall. Concealed behind the bushes he finally turned to face her.

"You look horrible. What happened?"

"My parents had a row."

"Your dad hit you?"

"He didn´t mean to. It was intended to be mum. I got in the way."

"You got...?" Lily stared at Severus in comprehension. "You tried to keep him from hitting your mother!"

"Well, I succeeded."

"But you got hit yourself!"

"Yes, now that you mention it. I didn´t think he´d do it. He always stopped when I stepped between them before. But not this time."

"This happened before?"

"I told you he was difficult."

"You told me they were shouting. You didn´t say anything about fighting."

"Usually they shout. But dad lost his job last week. Again. He has been drunk ever since. They have been shouting every day. The day before yesterday he hit her. I stepped between them, because I thought he wouldn´t hit me. Well, I was wrong."

"Why..."

"Mum says, I´m too tall now. He doesn´t regard me a little kid any more. She says, he has no objections to hit a young man."

"Why didn´t you come to our house? You´re safe there!"

"Look at me! I was ashamed. It´s not easy to tell people that your dad is a drunken rowdy who´s hitting his wife and son."

"But you´re telling me now."

"I know you. You would have stayed in front of our house until you knew the truth. I can´t keep things secret from you. You wouldn´t let me."

"Sorry, I never meant to put pressure on you."

"It´s all right. You don´t do it out of curiosity but of worry. OUCH!" Smiling was painful.

"Want to go for a walk?" Lily asked after a short pause.

"I´d rather not. I don´t want to be seen. People would ask questions."

"We could go to the wood. It´s not far from here, and there are few people. If you keep your head down, your hair will conceal your eye."

Severus agreed and they went to the forest. The air was fresh and rays of sunlight gave the scene a mystical touch. They walked in silence for a while. Then Severus broke it.

"Do you notice, how many potion ingredients we could get from here? We have to bring a bag next time."

-x-

Next time was tomorrow. Lily told her mother they would be out the whole day. So she had a picnic bag with her, when she came to pick up Severus at ten in the morning. Mrs Snape saw her son to the fence.

"Are you sure, you won´t need me, mum?" asked the boy. "I can stay if you want me to."

"No, no, dear, you go and have a nice day." Mrs Snape answered. "Good morning, Lily." She smiled warmly. "Take care, the two of you, and be back before nightfall. Here, dear." She handed her son a bag.

The boy took it and the two children set out for the forest. They hiked for two hours, picking herbs and mushrooms, when they found them. Lily had small plastik bags for them. "You´ll have to dry them alone." said Severus. "I really don´t want to face your parents like that."

"You don´t have to. I´ll do the drying."

"Thanks."

"Look, we could sit on those rocks and have lunch!" They did as Lily suggested. The girl put a napkin between them and started to lay out sandwiches, apples and lemonade. Severus added some pumpkin muffins from his bag.

"Is this a fresh bruise on your knuckles?" Lily asked casually while she unstoppered the lemonade bottle.

"No." A severe glance from Lily. "Well, yes. There was another row yesterday in the evening."

"You got hit?"

"Nearly, but I was too fast for him this time." Severus smiled, pleased with himself.

"And your knuckles?"

"I tried to hit him back but I missed. The wall behind him..."

"You had a fistfight with your father?" Lily nearly dropped the bottle.

"Of course not. He tried to hit mum, I tried to hit him instead, mum finally used a mild stunning spell on him. Fortunately he didn´t remember that when he awoke today. He´d be furious that she used magic on him."

"I know it´s not my business, and you don´t have to answer, but why did he marry a witch, seeing that he hates magic?"

"Mum says, he had no problem with magic in the beginning. But when he lost his job the first time, and mum had to conjure food and clothes, he became bitter about it. Felt he was a failure, not being able to feed his family."

"So she stopped using magic."

Severus nodded. "She only uses it in cases of emergency."

After lunch they left the path to look for more herbs and fungi. Their bags were full, when they finally returned home. Lily spent all evening in her room, storing away, what they had collected.

-x-

Severus came to the Evans house two days later. His face was back to normal. As it was a rainy day, Mrs Evans had no objections against resuming potion brewing. Lily lit the camping cooker and they started a series of experiments on how to boil down some of their mushrooms.

"That eye of yours healed really quickly." stated Lily.

"Mom made me a salve."

"Good. Is everything going well at home?"

"Yes. Mom talked to dad, when he was sober. Told him, he hit me. He was devastated. He tries to behave better now. Hasn´t had a drink for nearly three days." He sighed. "It won´t last long, it never does, but at the moment everything´s OK. Oh my god!" He put out the cooker and rushed to open the window as heavy, stinking fumes came from their pot. "Note down, that stiring is essential with this!"

Lily coughed and went to open the door, too. "We need some draught in here to get the fumes out. No need to make a note about the stiring. I´ll never forget this stench."

"Poor you, you have to sleep in here."

"Help me." Lily had taken one of her T-shirts and tried to fan the fumes to the window. Severus did as he was asked.

"May I ask you a question?" he asked while he was waving another shirt.

"If you don´t stop fanning while we talk..." Lily coughed again.

"I´ve been asking this myself while I was at home. How come, you have so much time for me? Aren´t you seeing your friends from elementary school? You always seemed quite popular."

Lily wiped a tear from her face and coughed.

"Sorry, I didn´t want to make you sad. You don´t have to answer."

"No, it´s just the fumes." She coughed again. "How can you stand them? I met the girls during Christmas break, but I felt sort of excluded. They chatted about school and friends and I couldn´t tell them anything. I was not allowed to."

"I see."

"We had nothing in common any more. I had to make a choice between losing my friends and breaking the law. So I lost them. I wouldn´t like to have to rattle my chains in prison."

"There are no chains in Azkaban."

"Azkaban?"

"The wizard prison. It´s guarded by dementors. Evil creatures. They don´t need chains to keep their prisoners."

"Close that door! The whole house stinks!" Petunia was furious. She slammed the door shut.

"Well, at least she was talking to me," sighed Lily.

Severus didn´t want to comment on Petunia, he had other things to think about: "You lost the girls and you came to me. I´m your makeshift solution."

"You know that´s not true. It´s not like I´m suffering when I spend my time with you. Do I look like I´m suffering?"

Severus stopped fanning and turned to face Lily. Her eyes were red with the fumes and her hair was untidy. She looked exhausted from waving. "To be honest, yes." He grinned.

Lily paused. She started to laugh.

-x-

August was pleasant. They spent it with potion brewing and collecting ingredients in the near forest. Both families were glad, they entertained themselves. The Evans, because Lily stayed out of her sister´s way, which reduced the tension within the family a lot. Mrs Snape, because Severus stayed out of his father´s way, his father, because he didn´t see much of the wizard brat.

Around the fifteenth Lily´s booklist arrived. There was a little agitation about Petunia and the owl, but nothing compared to the excitement last year´s letter had caused.

The next day Mr Evans asked Severus to have some words. "Getting Lily´s things was very complicated for us last years. We are no wizards. Do you think your mother would mind to go with us?"

"I can´t imagine why she would. I´ll ask her if you´d like me to."

"That´s very kind of you, boy, very kind."

-x-

Mrs Snape suggested the next Wednesday. They were four in the Evans´ car: Mrs Evans, Lily, Mrs Snape and Severus. Mrs Evans parked the car in a quiet side-street from where Mrs Snape led the way to the Leaky Cauldron and Diagon Alley. Their first stop was Gringotts, where the two women changed muggle money into galleons, sickles and knuts.

"Your mum uses muggle money?" whispered Lily.

"It´s dad´s money. I told you, he wants to pay for his family." Severus explained. Lily nodded in understanding.

When they were back in the sunshine in front of the white building that lodged the wizarding bank, Mrs Snape ticked the shops they needed to go to off on her fingers: "The apothecary´s, Flourish and Blott´s and a robes shop. Severus has grown some inches. His old ones won´t fit any more."

They went to the apothecary´s first. Severus and Lily tried to get as many potion ingredients as possible, but Mrs Snape put an end to it. "You won´t need any newt tongues in second year. They are telling stories, Mrs Evans. Don´t believe a word. These little swindlers are trying to get us into providing them with material for their hobby." The twinkling of her eyes contradicted her severe tone. She seemed pleased that her son was an enthusiastic potion brewer.

At Flourish and Blott´s Mrs Snape purchased some of Severus´s books second hand. Mrs Evans handed Lily´s book list to a shop-assistant.

Loaded with parcels they stepped out of the shop. "I need a break," said Mrs Evans. "Why don´t we have an ice-cream?" She pointed at Fortescue´s ice-cream parlour.

They sat at a small table in front of the shop. Mrs Evans ordered ice-creams for the children and cold lemonade for herself and Mrs Snape. Severus and Lily entertained themselves with watching the passing crowd and pointing out strange people to each other. Their mothers were soon absorbed in a conversation about the wizarding world. None of the four noticed the boy, who was observing them from the other side of the street.

After the ice-cream they went to one of the cheaper robes shops. Mrs Snape bought second hand robes for Severus. She refused to have them fit at the shop. While Mrs Snape dicussed with the seller, Lily asked her mother for a pair of black gloves. "Black? Are you sure, dear?" Mrs Evans asked. Lily nodded and glanced at the Snapes. Mrs Evans smiled. "I see. Yes. Black would be appropriate."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Back to school

The school year started pleasantly for Lily. She sat with Myra at the Gryffindor table and enjoyed the sorting and the feast. Myra had spent the summer with her family in France and had much to tell. She chatted happily about the places she had been to, the food she had tried and the plans she had already made for next summer. Lily listened with great interest.

Pleasantness ended on the way to Gryffindor tower. Sirius Black linked his left arm to Lily´s right, Potter linked on her other side. Myra was driven away from her in the crowd of students by Pettigrew.

"Peter says, he saw you eating ice-cream with that Slytherin. I thought, you realized last year, how bad he is for you!" Black muttered.

"You stay away from him," added Potter. "Take this piece of advice. You stay away from him!"

"Leave me alone," Lily spat. "It´s not your business, whom I eat ice-cream with!" She tried to shake the two boys off but they were too strong.

"He´ll have to answer us, don´t make us bring this home to you again. We´re watching you." Black sneered. They let go of her arms and disappeared in the crowd. Lily´s eyes filled with tears. Reaching Gryffindor tower, she went directly to her dormitory. Myra came after her.

"Where were you? I lost you on the way upstairs." She cried happily, when she entered. Seeing Lily´s tears, she paused. "What happened?" She sat on Lily´s bed. Lily wiped her face. Hesitantly she began telling about how Pettigrew must have seen her and Severus at Diagon Alley and how Black had threatened her.

Myra was commiserating. "Pettigrew is a rat!" she spat. "And Black...I could kill them. Who do they think they are!"

"I don´t dare to picture what they are going to do to Severus!" Lily sobbed.

"Severus can look after himself, he´ll be OK." Myra said. She didn´t sound sure of what she said.

"I can´t even warn him. They are observing us. Black said so. Pettigrew will shadow me all the time, if they tell him to. Oh, Myra, what am I to do?"

"Nothing. There´s nothing you can do without causing more harm than good. You have to hope, that your friend can fight them off."

"But they are four! This is not fair."

"I never said it was."

-x-

Lily spent the next two weeks looking out for Severus. She tried to see from the distance if he had been injured, but she couldn´t make out any signs of damage. She hoped that this was a good sign. As much as she would have liked to talk to her friend, she couldn´t. Wherever she went, one of the four Gryffindor boys was around, most of the time Pettigrew. In potions, Potter occupied the seat beside her, which had been taken by Severus last year.

Then, one Friday, Severus didn´t come to breakfast. Lily waited at the Gryffindor table as long as possible watching the door anxiously, but he didn´t turn up. For the first time in months she didn´t enjoy classes. All she could think about was Severus.

Her mood changed from nervous to edgy in the course of the day. Finally at supper she couldn´t restrain herself any longer. She rushed up to Black and his friends. "What have you done? Where is he?"

"I don´t know, what you are talking about," sneered Black. "We didn´t do nothing!"

"Don´t you lie to me! Tell the truth!" All four boys stared at her in amazement. Lily was furious. "Don´t act innocent. I know, it´s your fault!" Tears filled her eyes.

"Calm down, Lily. Come." Said a quiet voice from behind her. Myra took Lily back to Gryffindor tower, where the girl sobbed with frustration and fury until she finally fell asleep.

-x-

As if to mock Lily´s black mood, the next day was sunny and warm. After breakfast, where Severus was missing again, Myra suggested a stroll to the lake and Lily agreed. They took their charms books and parchment with them and started their essay on mobilisation charms. From time to time they tried a charm before they wrote down a description of its effect.

"Don´t look, he´s standing behind that yew tree." Lily whispered and frowned.

"Who?"

"One of Black´s cronies. I didn´t see him properly but I think it´s Lupin."

"Let him stand there all day. Who cares." Myra took her wand and waved it at her inkwell. It got four legs and took flight immediatly with trippling steps. Myra went after it, but was too slow. The small bottle ran right into the lake. "Oh, no, bloody thing," she cursed. "I´ll get a new one."

"Don´t be stupid, you can use mine!"

"I have to go in anyway. I´m starving. Want some chocolate, too?" Myra went up to the castle. As soon as she was out of sight, Remus Lupin emerged from behind the yew tree.

"Do you mind if I sit down for a moment?" he asked shyly.

"Why don´t you ask if I mind if you spy on me?" Lily answered in a bitter tune.

"I´m sorry." He sat on the grass beside her. There was a moment of awkward silence. At last he spoke up. "They said the truth. They didn´t do anything."

"What?"

"The Slytherin boy. You were talking about him yesterday, weren´t you? They didn´t do anything to him. They don´t know where he is, either."

"Why do you tell me? How can I know, you don´t lie?"

"You can´t."

"So, why?"

"You´re his only friend, aren´t you? I just thought, this is not fair..."

"It isn´t. But if you know it isn´t, why do you help them spy on me?"

"They are my only friends."

"Why are they doing this anyway. What do they have against me? What did I do?"

Lupin stared at her. "Against you? They mean to protect you. The Slytherin is not good for you. He made you cry."

"He never did. What gives them the idea?"

"I´m not sure. I understand, Sirius and James cought him, when he made you cry. That was before we became friends."

"There was no such incident. Why can´t they just leave me alone!"

Lupin shrugged and got up. "I just wanted you to know, that we did no harm to him." In the distance Myra appeared. Lupin went back behind the yew tree.

-x-

Severus remained unseen for more than a week. Lily was on the edge of despair. Wednesday morning potions class was interrupted by the blonde Gryffindor prefect.

"Excuse me, Sir," she addressed professor Slughorn, who was just chatting with Josef Greenspoon about his aunt´s latest appearance in the Daily Prophet. "I´m supposed to take Evans to the headmaster´s office."

"Do so, do so," cried Slughorn happily without even looking up.

Lily packed her things and followed the prefect upstairs. She was nervous and curious at the same time. Did being taken to the headmaster mean that there was something wrong? On the other hand, the office of the headmaster surely was very interesting. The prefect took her to a stone gargoyle which seemingly guarded the entrance to the office. They were awaited as the beast jumped aside to let them pass. Behind the gargoyle was a moving spiral staircase, which ended in front of an oak door.

"You go in," said the prefect and stepped back on the moving stairs.

Lily knocked and the door was opened by professor Dumbledore himself. "Ah, come in, Miss Evans," he said with a warm smile. "We´ve been waiting for you." Lily stepped into the office and uttered a cry of joy. Beside Dumbledore´s desk stood Severus.

He looked pale and smaller than usual. He smiled weakly, when Lily approached him.

"You must know, Miss Evans," Dumbledore said and closed the door, "that Master Snape suffered a severe loss lately. His mother died last Friday."

Lily gasped. "Oh no," she whispered. "Oh, I´m so sorry." She hugged the boy and for a moment the two children stood embraced. "How did that happen?" asked Lily when she let go of her friend.

Severus struggled for words. Finally the professor stepped in. "That, Miss Evans, is not known. She was found dead, but who or what killed her will remain a secret. There are many possibilities. An accident, murder or even a curse. The only witness seems to be Master Snape´s father, who claims he can´t remember."

Lily glanced at Severus. The boy bit his lip.

"To make things worse," Dumbledore continued, "Mr Snape refused to let his son return to Hogwarts. Well, at least this I was able to sort out. So," he went on with a broad smile, "we have Master Snape back and he confided in me on our way back, that your presence would be of great comfort to him. Would you like a cup of cocoa?" The two children nodded. "Well, so I will go to the kitchens and fetch some, you have a seat meanwhile." He pointed at two armchairs near the fireplace.

They sat near the fire and enjoyed the warmth for a while in silence.

"I nearly got mad, when you were gone."

"Sorry. I should have left a message."

"How could you have? – Do you think your dad...?"

"No. I´m not sure but when he´s drunk enough to lose his memory, he´s not agressive. The more he drinks, the calmer he gets, after he´s past a certain point."

"But who...?"

"I don´t know. There are rumours about a Dark Lord, says Dumbledore. But there´s no proof that she was killed by somebody at all. It might have been an accident."

"Is it true, your dad won´t let you come back?"

Severus nodded. "Said, there´s no decency in learning magic. Said, his son won´t need hocus pocus. I´m to feed my family with my hands´ work, like he did." The boy sounded bitter. "Dumbledore was furious. They shouted."

Lily looked at him in awe. "Albus Dumbledore shouted at your father to have you come back to Hogwarts?"

Severus nodded again. The memory magiced a small smile on his pale face. "By the way... The greatest sorcerer in the world goes to the kitchens to get cocoa?" Dumbledore seemed to have waited for his cue. He entered with a small cough. "Can you believe it," he beamed. "Halfway down to the kitchens I remembered I have a wand." He conjured two mugs of cocoa from thin air. "Did you have a pleasant chat?"

The headmaster sat behind his desk reading while the children drank their cocoa in silence. "It´s too late for your potions class, now. You better go to lunch," he advised them, when they had finished.

"Yes, Sir. Thank you." The two friends left the office. Severus went directly to the Great Hall. Lily waited behind the gargoyle for some minutes before she followed.

-x-

Lily didn´t go to the Great Hall. She went down to the dungeons and waited in front of the potions classroom. When the students came out, she craned her neck for Remus Lupin. She was lucky. Black, Potter and Pettigrew left the dungeon together, but Lupin stayed behind. "See you at lunch, Remus!" cried Black. "It will take him ages to clean that up," he added in a lower voice.

"Shouldn´t we help him?" Potter was concerned.

"Nah, I´m hungry!" Black shook his head, Pettigrew nodded, then shook his head in imitation of Black.

Lily slipped into the classroom, where Lupin was mopping up a stenchy green liquid, which had not only swamped his workplace and the floor, but also soaked his book. Lily took out her wand and started drying the book. Lupin looked up from the floor, puzzled.

"I need a quick word," whispered Lily with a glance to the desk, where professor Slughorn sat, and continued her work on the book.

"I won´t go away from here in the next hour, it seems," sighed Lupin. "What do you want?"

"You seem to be more decent than the others. I need your help."

Lupin stopped mopping.

"Severus, I mean the Slytherin boy, is back. Someone died. I need you to make your friends leave him alone. At least for a while."

"Who died?"

"It´s not my business to tell you this. I already told you more than he´d approve of."

"How am I to make Sirius Black do what I want? You know him."

"I need you to try. Please!"

"If I tell them, you asked me to, they´ll guess you talked to him again."

Lily sighed. "Come on, what kind of spy are you? I´ll go to lunch and talk to Myra in a whisper. You come, walk by close and tell them, you overheard me telling Myra about it. How Dumbledore told me, when I was at his office."

"This could work. I´ll try."

Lily smiled at Lupin gratefully. "Thank you. Give me five minutes to find Myra before you come to the hall." She waved her wand at the remaining liquid and vanished it with a spell.

Lupin stared after her in amazement. This was not a second year spell. Not at all.

At his desk, from where he had been supervising Lupin´s cleaning, professor Slughorn thought exactly the same.

-x-

Things were quiet at Hogwarts for the rest of term apart from the fact that professor Slughorn started strolling by Lily´s table to have a closer look at her potions from time to time. Lupin seemed to have managed to talk his friends into a truce and Lily stayed away from Severus to give them no reason to break it. Sign language worked well enough.

The journey home for Christmas contained a common ride in Mr Evans´ car, where Severus was warmly invited to come to the Evans´ house by Lily´s mother. He came with bad news the next day.

"Dad says, he won´t let me come to ´fraternize with other wizard´s brats on a regular basis´. Sorry! I barely managed to talk him into letting me come today. He´s talking about teaching me to do a man´s work."

"What´s that supposed to mean?" Lily frowned.

"I´m not sure, but I suspect, I´ll know how to chop wood by the end of the holidays. I just hope, he wasn´t talking about slaughtering chickens."

"Why would he do that?" Lily and her mother, who were having tea with Severus in the living room, looked disgusted.

"We have a little chicken-coop behind our house. He slaughters one from time to time."

"Do you want me to talk to your father, dear?" asked Mrs Evans in concern.

"No, thank you. If he can teach me during the break, he won´t have objections against me going back to Hogwarts. Knowing how to chop wood even may come in handy one day. I´m only worried because of those chickens."

"So I´ll have to give you your Christmas present now!" cried Lily. She rushed up to her room and returned with a small parcel, wrapped in brown paper. "I didn´t know, you wouldn´t come any more or I would have wrapped it in Christmas paper earlier. Sorry, it´s not beautiful."

Severus took the present. "It looks marvellous, thank you. I don´t have a present for you," he said sadly.

"You don´t have to."

"I´ll open it at Christmas. It may be the only present I get this year."

They talked a little longer before Severus returned to his home for the rest of the break.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: New relations

Lily didn´t see Severus before he came out of his father´s front door and took his seat beside her in the back of the car.

"Was it wood or chicken?" Lily asked.

"Both. Did you know that a chicken... well, probably not."

Lily dropped the topic as Severus looked green in his face at the mere mentioning of chicken. "Did you find them useful?" she pointed at the black gloves he was wearing.

The boy nodded. "They were the best present I ever had. Thank you!" he said. "Though, I had a little problem with them. I caught on a splinter. Look!" He showed a big hole on his right palm. "I´ll repair them at school."

-x-

They wished each other a pleasant term before going to the platform. "We go on the train with housemates." Lily informed her parents when they asked. "Oh, look, there´s Myra!" She waved. Myra waved back with a broad smile and hurried to join Lily and her parents. In her tow was a tall, slender girl, whose short hair had exactly the same color as Lily´s.

"Hello, Lily! Mrs and Mr Evans!" they shook hands. "This is my cousin Angelique. She´ll attend Hogwarts for the rest of the school year. This is my best friend, Lily and her parents." Myra introduced.

"Bon jour!" Angelique greeted politely. "Good day! I´m pleezed to meet you!" She smiled.

"Nice to meet you, too," answered Lily. "Do you already know which house you´ll be in?"

"Oui, I meen, yes. I went to Hogwarts with my uncle last week and the headmaster had me sorted in his office. I will be in Gryffindor with you. I found it so funny to be sorted by a hat."

"Let´s go and find seats," suggested Myra. She linked to Lily and Angelique and drew the two towards the train. Mr and Mrs Evans followed with Lily´s bag. They found their daughter in a compartment holding the now six Gryffindor second year girls. Mr Evans put the bag into the luggage rack and hugged his daughter good bye. Mrs Evans advised Lily to write and eat properly, then the two left.

The journey back to school was pleasant. Soon the six girls were giggling about what each had been doing in her holidays. Eloise and Kassandra had spent most of the break at a muggle hotel. Eloise´s parents were experimenting with skiing and the two girls had spent more than a week playing tricks on innocent muggles. They were all laughing hard on Kassandra´s story how they had vanished a steak, nearly driving a room service waiter crazy by doing so, when the compartment door slid open.

"Rumor has it, we have a new class mate." It was Sirius Black, who stood in the door. Behind him stood, most predictably, Potter, Lupin and Pettigrew. "We wanted to introduce ourselves." He grinned broadly. The laughter had died at his sight. "I´m Sirius Black and my friends are James Potter, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew." He pointed at each as he said his name. "You´ll see, life is pleasant at Gryffindor tower, as long as you don´t go fraternizing with the enemy." He gave Lily a threatening look. "Oooops, sorry Evans." With a flick of his wand he had turned over Lily´s bottle of pumpkin juice.

Angelique was up in the fraction of a second. She was some inches taller than Black and pointed her wand right at his nose. "Should you ever try again to threaten me, I´ll curse your face, it will take your mommy more than a second glance to recognize you." She hissed. "You take your cronies and leave before I decide to give you a free try-out." She pushed the surprised boy out of the compartment and smashed the door shut.

"What an idiot!" she exclaimed and sat down. "You need help with this?" She pointed at Lily´s wet shirt and jeans. Lily shook her head and waved her wand.

"You made an enemy," she said earnestly. "Or better to say, four."

"Who cares." Angelique laughed. "Did you see ´is face?"

"You can´t really curse him, can you?" Myra was concerned.

"I can´t. But I won´t tell ´im. And I won´t let them intimidate me. That´s not what we are tought at Beauxbatons."

Nevertheless, the mood was not as light-hearted as it had been before for the rest of the journey.

-x-

Angelique turned out to be rather talented in practical jokes. She was the first person in Gryffindor tower to give Sirius Black a run for his money. Soon Black and his friends had to face the fact that they were retaliated for their pranks. For some weeks Black tried to get the upper hand of Angelique, but after the incedent at the green house (he was nearly eaten by a giant flesh eating plant and got told of – to Angelique´s malicious grin – for being careless), he gave up and tried to stay out of the girls´ way.

As they were now studying more advanced potions and spells, lessons became more interesting for Lily. At mealtimes she exchanged signs with Severus. All in all spring term was delightful.

A week before Easter break Severus disappeared again.

-x-

Again Lily suffered badly. She was torn between her concern for her friend and frustration. She even thought about going straight to Dumbledore and ask him about Severus´s whereabouts, but Dumbledore seemed to have vanished, too.

"You can go to his parents´ house and ask," said Myra, when they left for the train. Lily nodded.

"So it´s you who´s fraternizing with the enemy," Angelique grinned. "You have to show me, which one we´re talking about, when he´s back. Is he cute?"

"I never thought about that." Lily frowned.

"He´s not. But he´s her friend," stated Myra matter-of -factly.

-x-

Lily was picked up at King´s Cross by her mother. She hadn´t counted on Petunia turning up, but the fact that her dad was missing came as a surprise to her. "We´ll meet him at home," she was told by her mother when she asked. As they were only two, Lily traveled on the front seat, chatting happily about the past term.

When they arrived at the Evans´ house, Lily took her bag upstairs. She stood rooted to the spot, when she opened her room´s door.

After a minute she turned round. "Who has been using my room?" It was only now, that she realized that her mother had followed her upstairs.

"I´m sorry, dear. I had no time to tidy up a bit. We were in such a hurry this morning." Her mother looked apologetical. She pressed past her daughter and started to change sheets on Lily´s bed. "Come in and help me with this, please."

"In a hurry? Who is we?"

"Oh, it´s so horrible. Sit down, dear, sit down." Mrs Evans pointed at the chair and sat down on the bed herself. Lily did as she was told to. "Last week Mr Snape was found dead in his house. Broke his neck when he fell down the stairs, apparantly."

Lily gasped.

"Professor Dumbledore came to us and asked, if we´d take Severus, or he´d go directly to an orphanage, the poor boy. Your dad and Severus are at the ministry of magic with the professor today. There´s a hearing. Oh, I hope we´ll get custody for him." Mrs Evans looked on the edge of tears.

"They´d rather send him to an orphanage than let him live with you?" Lily was puzzled.

"You see, they don´t give wizard children to – what do they call us – muggles easily. But the professor says, we may get him, seeing that we have a witch daughter."

"So if things go right, Severus will be my brother?"

"Your foster-brother, to be exact. I thought, they´d be back before us. I just hope, this is a good sign."

They finished changing the sheets and went down to the living room to have some tea. Lily was on tenterhooks.

"How is Petunia reacting to this? She won´t like Severus living in this house," asked Lily.

"She´s been hiding in her room these past days. But Severus is used to stay out of her way, so there were no unpleasant scenes. Seeing that the two of you won´t be here more than some weeks a year, I think she has to cope with it."

-x-

It was well past 8pm, when Mr Evans and Severus turned up at last. Mr Evans looked pleased.

"Did it go well? Did we get custody?" Mrs Evans asked eagerly.

When her husband nodded with a broad smile she gave a cry of joy and hugged the pale boy, who was standing beside her husband. "Oh, I´m so relieved we can keep you," she cried happily, "I´ll make supper now!" She hurried to the kitchen, while Lily, Severus and her husband were hugging each other in celebration.

-x-

The cheerful atmosphere was put to an end at Petunia´s appearance at supper.

"So we really got landed with him?" she asked, uttering Severus a suspicous glance.

The boy shrank in his chair.

"Don´t be rude, Petunia," said Mrs Evans. "Severus is very welcome in this house." She put some more stew on the boy´s plate.

"Is he?" Petunia shot another look of disgust.

"We have to talk about sleeping arrangements. We are one bedroom short." Mrs Evans tried to change topic. "I was thinking for the time being, Severus could take Lily´s room and Lily could move to Petunia´s..."

"You can´t be serious, mum." Petunia dropped her fork. "I will not share my room with her." She pointed at her younger sister as if she was something unclean.

"Be reasonable, Petunia. It´s only for two weeks. We´ll think of something different for the summer." Mr Evans was angry.

"I can sleep on the sofa. I don´t want to cause trouble." Severus said in a small voice.

"Nonsense." Mr Evans was fuming. "Petunia will share her room."

"I will not!" Petunia jumped to her feet and rushed out of the room.

"Please, dad," whispered Lily, "don´t make me move in with that fury!"

"So, what are we to do?" Mr Evans sighed. "The sofa is not very comfortable."

"Why can´t Severus and I share room? He could sleep on the air-mattress like Laura did, when she slept here. It would be better than the sofa."

Mr Evans thought it over. "This might be a solution for the Easter break." He said at last.

After supper Mrs Evans went upstairs with Lily and Severus and helped them put up a bed for the boy on Lily´s old air-mattress. She then sent them to bed, as it was late and she wanted to have a word with Petunia before she retired herself.

-x-

"I´m sorry about your dad," whispered Lily in the dark. "This is very sad."

"Thank you. Though part of me is relieved. I was worrying about those chickens."

Lily giggled. "What happened at the ministry? Mum said, you could be sent to an orphanage."

"They wanted to but Dumbledore sorted it out. He was great. And your dad did well, too. He said it was ridiculous to assume I´d be better off at an orphanage than with your family. Dumbledore said what a great student you are and how this was all due to your parents good education."

"I´m glad, you can stay here."

"So am I." There was a short silence. "I took one of your books."

"What?"

"I was bored and I took one of your books without asking. I´m sorry."

"Don´t be stupid. You can take my books. Which one did you choose?"

"The one with the story about the Canterville Ghost. It´s funny."

"I like that story, but I never thought it was funny."

"But it is."

"You have to explain that."

"Just think about the Hogwarts ghosts and then read the story. Can you imagine the Bloody Baron using water-color?"

"You are right, this is funny. Let´s have a look." Lily sat up and started rummaging in her bedside table´s drawer. "Here it is." She lit a torch. "Where is the book?"

It was Severus´s turn to rummage. He found the book on the floor under the desk. "Here."

"Start reading." Lily passed him the torch. Severus did as he was asked and soon the two were shaken by fits of laughter. After some pages he passed the book and torch to Lily and she went on reading. The fun was put to an end when Mrs Evans opened the door and said "The two of you are keeping the whole house awake. Sleep now!" in a gentle voice.

They remained silent for some minutes, then Lily continued reading in a whisper. Soon they were giggling and laughing again. This time Mrs Evans was angry. "You put that away and sleep now. We´re all tired." – "Yes, mum." – "Yes, Mrs Evans."

-x-

Lily waited for her mother to close her bedroom door before she turned the torch back on.

"We can´t go on reading. Your mum will be furious!" whispered Severus.

"We just have to be very low-voiced. We can each read for ourselves. Come up!" She moved over and tapped her mattress. Severus frowned and obeyed. Soon the two children lay flat on their bellies reading their story. Lily held the torch, Severus turned the pages. From time to time they pointed at passages of the text and stiffled giggles.

-x-

"Lily, Severus, it´s way past 10! Breakfast..." Mrs Evans called in a gentle voice, which changed into a shriek at the sight of her daughter and foster-son. "Lily Evans! Severus Snape! Have you lost your mind? Up! Get up at once!"

Lily opened her eyes and stared at her mother with a moan. "What are you shouting for, mum?" She stretched her arm. "Ouch!" She put the book, on which she had fallen asleep, on her feather-bed.

"Ouch!" beside her Severus moaned, too. "I must have been lying on this torch the whole night!" He sat up and put the torch onto the bedside table.

Mrs Evans stared at the two children and a smile of relief showed on her face. "You´ve been reading that book. I thought you were..." she blushed. "Sorry, come down to breakfast, dears."

Lily turned to her friend. "What was that about?"

Severus gave it some thought, then he blushed. "We´d better go to breakfast quickly." He got up, collected his clothes from the chair and went off to the bathroom.

-x-

When they came down to the kitchen, they could hear Lily´s parent talk through the door.

"I tell you, it looked as if the were embracing each other. Calm down, dear, they were only reading a book."

"Tonight they were reading a book. I just don´t want to think about tomorrow."

"Don´t be ridiculous!"

"Some minutes ago, you were being ridiculous yourself!"

"I was wrong. Don´t say anything, when they come down. The boy´s had a hard week."

"This doesn´t give him the right to crawl into my daughter´s bed."

Severus lifted his arm to knock at the door. Lily caught his arm in midair. "What are they talking about?" she mouthed. Severus whispered into her ear. The girl blushed crimson.

Severus knocked at the door and entered the kitchen. "Good morning, Mr and Mrs Evans." he said politely. "Please accept my apology for giving you a shock, Mrs Evans. It won´t happen again."

"You can bet on that, boy," said Mr Evans. "I want your word that you´ll stay on your air-mattress in the future."

"I give you my word that I´ll stay in whatever place you see fit for me for the night, Sir." Severus answered solemnly. "We were reading a book yesterday evening and I got up to Lily so we wouldn´t wake you. I must have fallen asleep."

"Dad! What are you thinking of us! This is insulting!" Lily was upset.

"No, child, now I´ve Severus´s word, it´s funny." Mr Evans smiled and turned to his wife, who was frying some eggs for the children. "You really thought...?" He laughed.

"Stop making fun of me!" Mrs Evans scolded as she was placing plates in front of Lily and Severus.

-x-

The rest of the Easter break passed quickly. Lily and Severus spent some time taking an inventory of their potion ingredients. One day Mrs Evans and the children went to the Snape house to get some of Severus´s things. Severus was very silent and deep in thought the whole day. Visiting his parents´ house was clearly depressing for him.

They were back on the Hogwarts express far too soon. This time Lily, Myra and Angelique had a compartment on their own, because Eloise and her friends were taken to Hogwarts via apparition. All three girls had much to tell about their holidays.

"He was where?" Myra nearly suffocated on her chocolate frog. "Lily Evans, you wicked girl!"

"Hallo, we were reading!"

"Oh, yes, you were reading. I DO believe you!"

"You really have to show me, which one we are talking about!" Angelique interjected. "He´d better be cute."

"Not you, too. We were reading. And we didn´t want mum to catch us."

"Ha, now you´re telling the truth! I bet, you didn´t want your mum to catch you! Oh, come, I´m only teasing!" Myra put her arm around Lily´s shoulder. "Don´t be angry with me. You have to admit, that this could only happen to you, my innocent little sheep."

Lily wiped a tear from her cheek and smiled. "Maybe you´re right. We weren´t thinking... we just wanted to finish that story."

"You really have to show me, which..." – "I´ll show you," Myra mouthed to her cousin.

"You know," she added, "what Black would do, if he knew."

Lily looked shocked. "You wouldn´t tell him, would you?" she whispered.

"Of course not, this is a little secret between the three of us, well, four, but we can´t even tell Eloise and the others. This is too delicate information. I was just pointing out, that Black and his idiot friends wouldn´t like this at all."

"On the other hand," said Angelique with a conspiratory expression, "they can´t have anything against it. I mean, you were not talking that night, were you?"

The girls laughed. Then Myra started to tell how she and Angelique had moved her little brother´s easter eggs by magic. The poor boy spent nearly two hours looking for them in their parents´ garden. The three friends were in an excellent mood, when the train pulled into Hogsmeade station.

"Let´s find an empty carriage," cried Myra happily and moved towards the fleet of horseless carriages which was waiting for the students in front of the station building.

Angelique stood rooted on the spot. "Look at them. They are really taking four on one!" She drew her wand. "Oh, these rats!"

Lily looked in the direction, in which Angelique pointed. Her heart nearly stopped. Severus was surrounded by all four Gryffindor troublemakers. She thought about interfering for a moment, but then she realized that Severus had his wand in his hand. She put her hand on Angelique´s arm. "That´s Severus. He can handle that. They can´t do anything to him, if they don´t have the element of surprise."

To proof her right, Pettigrew stepped back from the little group, howling with pain and clutching his wandhand. Seconds later the other three boys fled, too. Lily just caught a short glimpse of a black snake dissolving into smoke as soon as it had served its purpose. Severus pocketed his wand and scratched his left ear in response to Lily´s sign.

"So, this is he?" Angelique asked and turned to follow Lily to the carriage, where Myra was waiting. "Well, cute is not the right word for him, but he´s definitely interesting. Am I deaf or did I just witness a second year perform nonverbal spells?" Lily didn´t answer and Angelique dropped the topic as a Hufflepuff girl had taken the fourth seat in their carriage.

-x-

Lily waited for Lupin´s turn to be her shadow. When she saw him sneaking around the shelves in the library, she put her transfiguration homework back into her bag and set out for the trophy room. There she hid behind the door and waited for him to come. As soon as the boy entered the room, he found himself facing a wand.

"What was that at the station?" hissed Lily. "What were you thinking you were doing?"

"Put that wand down, please." Lupin sighed. He showed his hands to make clear, he didn´t have his. "I´m sorry, I couldn´t stop them."

Lily lowered her wand and stepped back. "So, what was this about? What did he do?"

"Nothing. James and Sirius were bored and he was sitting in the compartment next to ours. I tried to stop them, I swear."

"Why didn´t you succeed? Don´t you have any influence on your friends?"

"I tried, but Peter, well, he liked the idea and was egging them on..."

"Don´t tell me, you can´t controll that slimy little rat!"

"It didn´t seem to me your Slytherin needed my help anyway. You better be careful. This guy is up to his nose in dark stuff. Did you see that snake?"

"I saw that he´d rather scare you off than hurt you."

Lupin hesitated. "I never saw it from that angle."

"So it´s time you did. I´m going to my dormitory now to finish my homework. You can tell Black, I escaped you." Lily grabbed her bag and left Remus Lupin lost in his thoughts.

-x-

The next evening Gryffindor tower saw a most remarkable quarrel. It happened after supper. Lily and her friends were sitting in a corner, working on their charms homework.

Black and his group had occupied the armchairs near the fireplace. They were doing homework, too, but from time to time they paused to point a wand at one of their fellow Gryffindors to play a "prank". They laughed and had short conversations between doing bits of their assignments.

Suddenly Black jumped to his feet. "What do you mean by ´rather scare us off than hurt us´? Are you mental?"

"You make it sound like this scum is a saint!" Potter added.

Lupin blushed and shrank in his seat. "No, no, not a saint, I just thought..." he said in a small voice.

"You thought what?" Black was furious.

"He could have cursed all of us, but he didn´t."

"You leave the thinking to people who are more used to it, Remus. You´re not befriending the enemy, are you?" fumed Black. Pettigrew watched the scene with a malicious grin.

"No, of course I´m not..." Lupin was fighting a lost battle.

Lily was up without thinking. "You´re not content with bullying the rest of us," she sneered at Black. "Having a go at your own friends if you´re bored enough, aren't you. Dear, dear, life´s going to be lonely if you scare them all off." She shook her head and left for her dormitory.

Black stared after her in amazement. Then he looked at Lupin and his expression softened. "Sorry, Remus! Got carried away," he said and resumed working on his essay.

"No offence taken, Sirius," said Lupin. A small smile played round his face when he glanced at the stairway to the girls´ dormitories.

-x-

Lupin caught Lily on the way to breakfast the next morning.

"Thank you!" he whispered.

"You´re welcome," the girl whispered back. "I have to apologize, I wasn´t aware what I was asking from you. Why do you let him treat you this way?"

"They are the only friends I have."

"There might be others."

"I´m not as strong as you are."

-x-

The boys were on war the whole summer term. Not that anyone did mention it to Lily, but she could tell from the fact that Severus and the Black group were sporting injuries in turn. To Lily´s relief Severus kept giving the "I´m OK"-sign at mealtimes and as long as the four Gryffindor boys showed signs of stinges, boils and missing eyebrows, Lily supposed he was telling the truth.

"I just don´t understand, why the teachers don´t interfere," she sighed on the way to the charms classroom. "Did you see that bruise on his cheek this morning?"

"It could hardly be overlooked," answered Myra. "I suppose they all think it´s head of house business." She shrugged. "Slughorn wouldn´t notice if Severus was missing his head. He´s not from an interesting family, you know."

"I suppose McGonagall is secretly cheering for the one who's bullying the bullies." Angelique added. "No punishment she gives them could be more impressive to them than these hexes and curses."

"She can´t approve of a four on one fight!" Lily said.

"Who says, she knows it´s four on one."

-x-

June approached quickly. Lily and her friends were busy studying for their exams. After the exams, Lily had to chose her new subjects for her third year. She signed up for Care of Magical Creatures and Ancient Runes immediately. She and Severus had considered their choice during the Easter break for some evenings.

"I understand Magical Creatures," said Myra. "You´re interested in potions and creatures are partly used for potions, but why on earth runes? It´s said to be really difficult!" She had signed up for Care of Magical Creatures, too, but hesitated to follow Lily´s lead for Ancient Runes.

"Old spell books are written in runes. I checked in the library. There´s a whole section written in ancient runes. Being able to read these could come in very useful."

"Probably you´re right," Myra sighed and signed up for runes as well. "You promise to help me if I turn out to be an idiot at runes."

"You got my word."

"We don´t have to choose additional subjects before fourth year at Beauxbatons," Angelique interjected. "It's much too early for you to choose. You don't know what you want to be yet."

"What will you choose?" Myra asked.

"I was thinking about Ancient Runes as well. But not Magical Creatures. It's too dirty. Maybe I'll sign up for Latin."

"Latin?"

"Latin. Most spells are Latin. I could be a spellmaker."

"A spellmaker? What a pity they don´t teach Latin here!" Lily´s eyes glittered with interest.

-x-

The journey back to King´s Cross was sad, as it meant saying farewell to Angelique, who was to return to France in summer. Angelique and Lily promised to write to each other. Myra was cheerful, as she and her family were going to spend the summer with Angelique and her parents.

Mr and Mrs Evans were already waiting for Lily and Severus and greeted both of them with a hug. Lily just hoped, that they weren´t seen by Black or one of his cronies. A wish, which she knew very well, was rather unlikely to be granted as the platform was full of people picking up their children.

The car ride was once more filled with questions about how the exams went, the only difference to last year was that Mr and Mrs Evans asked about Severus´s grades as well and praised him for doing well. The boy looked pleased with himself and Lily smiled at him.

At supper Mrs Evans brought up the question of sleeping arrangements. "You can´t stay on that air-mattress all summer, dear. You´ll have to take the sofa. Or we could get a bunk bed for Lily´s room." Obviously the "Lily moves into Petunia´s room"-solution was no longer an option. Petunia was pleased and glared at Lily and Severus maliciously.

"I thought about this, Mrs Evans," Severus said. "If it´s OK with you, I could sleep at my room in my parents´ house."

"You can´t stay in that house all by yourself, dear." Mrs Evans cried.

"It would be only for the night, I can come over to your house for the day. It would solve our problem and I wouldn´t mind."

"This sounds reasonable to me," agreed Mr Evans. "If you really don´t mind staying there all alone. You don´t have to, you know."

"This house has not be used for months. It needs cleaning first," Mrs Evans reminded them.

"So the air-mattress will have to do for one more night. Tomorrow you and the children can clean the Snape house, dear." Mr Evans pointed out to his wife.

"What a brilliant idea," Mrs Evans smiled. "The four of us will clean that house in an instant!"

"What do you mean by ´the four of us´, mum? You´re not expecting me to enter that freak house?" Petunia joined the conversation with a frown.

"You do not expect me to let her into my house?" Severus retaliated.

Mrs Evans sighed. "So it will be the three of us. I just thought if you spent some time together and knew each other better..."

"She´s spent years with Lily. To what result?" Severus was angry now.

"I know that scum well enough!" Petunia shouted.

"You take that back, Petunia. You´re being rude." Mr Evans tried to restore calm.

"So, am I?" Petunia got up and left for her room.

"I´m sorry. I didn´t mean to drive her away." Severus said in a small voice.

"Don´t worry, dear." Mrs Evans smiled and touched his shoulder softly. "You can´t let her insult you all the time. She has to learn to keep a truce at least."

-x-

Mrs Evans went upstairs with Lily after supper and helped her with Severus´s air-mattress.

"Really, Mrs Evans," the boy said. "I can do that."

"Don´t be silly, dear, I prepared Lily´s bed for her and I´ll do the same for you. I just didn´t beforehand because I wasn´t sure, where it would be." Mrs Evans shook up Severus´s pillow. "Good night!" she bade before she left the room.

Lily started rolling up the boys sleeves as soon as her mother had left. "Are you injured?" she asked examining his arms carefully.

Severus pulled his arms from her and put his sleeves back down. "Stop that!" he hissed. "Heaven knows, what your mother will be thinking we are doing if she comes back."

Lily retreated, but a glance in the boy's eyes told her, that – despite his rude tone – he was pleased that she cared.

"I´m OK." Severus added. "Really. Just one little bruise here." He liftet the leg of his jeans and showed a small bruise on his left ankle. "Pettigrew got me from behind." He took his bag and went to the bathroom to change into his nightshirt.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: A treasure

After breakfast Severus, Lily and her mother went to the Snape house with an assortment of cleaning rags and detergents.

"I´ll do the kitchen, Lily the living room and you can take the sleeping rooms, dear." Mrs Evans directed. "That way Lily and I aren´t likely to intrude too much onto your private properties."

"Thank you, Mrs Evans. If you´re not sure about an item, please ask me or Lily. There might be some magical things lying about. And if you happen to find mom´s old broomstick, please, don´t use it for cleaning."

They started at once. From time to time Mrs Evans checked on the two children, but they were doing well. Lily dusted the book shelves in the living room, which contained only old battered muggle paperback books. Mrs Evans experienced a moment of shock when a nutcracker tried to bite her, but Severus – alarmed by her shriek – showed her how to handle the rebellious thing.

Lunch was taken in the living room. "Didn´t your mom read any magic books?" asked Lily and pointed at the now dust free shelves.

"I suppose she did, but she must have kept them somewhere else. Dad wouldn´t have tolerated magical stuff in his living room. She only had some magical kitchen items, because he never cared to come to the kitchen."

"There´s more?" Mrs Evans looked uncomfortable.

"At least a self-acting rolling-pin. I can finish the kitchen if you feel uncomfortable."

"No, dear, no need to. I´m warned now." Mrs Evans smiled feebly.

They met again in the living room four hours later. All three of them were exhausted. Mrs Evans wiped sweat from her forehead. "That was hard work. We could have used Petunia's help. I just hope she prepared supper," she sighed. "But the house can be used now. You come over for supper and then can return here for the night if you really want to do that."

Severus nodded. "I´ll do so, Mrs Evans. Thank you."

It turned out, that Petunia hadn´t cared about supper. Her mother was furious. She sent the girl upstairs without a meal and prepared some sandwiches for the rest of the family. After a quick bite Severus returned to his parents´ house.

-x-

When Lily came to the kitchen for breakfast the next morning, Severus was already there. He was just finishing his ham and eggs.

"Hi, sleepyhead," he said. "I was just talking to your mother about moving our potions lab to mom´s kitchen. I´m not using it to cook anyway and you´d get all the herbs out of your room."

"Heaven knows, I could do with some more space," yawned Lily. "Can I have peppers with my eggs, mum?"

Mrs Evans put a plate in front of her daughter. "Cocoa or tea?" she asked.

"Tea, please."

"It might not be a bad idea to move your potions workshop to the Snape house, dears. I know, your work is important for school, but sometimes the stench is really irritating." Mrs Evans poured a cup of tea for Lily.

"So then it´s settled. We can start moving our things when I finished breakfast." Lily took a forkful of egg.

"Hurry up then," the boy urged, "we got loads to do!"

"Severus Snape, you stop pushing me. We have all summer to do this. There´s no need for me to suffocate on my breakfast."

"Sorry, I just wish, you´d hurry up a bit."

"Nuisance!"

-x-

They started packing their herbs and mushroom concoctions after breakfast. It soon became clear, that they´d have to make the way to the Snape house several times. But as Lily had pointed out, they had all summer. When they left Lily´s room with a huge box of ingredients each, Petunia came out of her room.

"Are you moving out, finally?" she asked pertly.

Lily was angry. "No, we´re not. We just got ourselves a house as a playground for the day."

They carried their boxes over to Severus´s house. When they reached the entrance, the boy put his box down and rummaged in his pocket.

"Ah, here it is," he finally said pulling a pink ribbon out of his jeans.

"What´s that?" Lily asked.

The boy laughed. "Your key to your lab, stupid." And really, from the ribbon dangled a key.

"You´re giving me the key to your house?"

"Why not, it will be your lab as well as mine, it´s only just you have a key!"

"Thank you. I only wish, you wouldn´t have made the ribbon pink. I´m not eight years old, you know."

Severus grinned and produced another key on a pink ribbon from his pocket. "It was the only ribbon I found, and foreseeing you wouldn´t like the color, I thought, I might appease you by using the same thing for my key." He pointed at the door invitingly. "If you please..."

Lily unlocked the door and they took their boxes to the kitchen.

"I have to show you something." Severus grinned and pointed at a small door beside the refridgerator.

"You want to show me, where your mom kept her tins?"

"Oh, come on, I discovered it this morning. I woke early and thought I could make myself a cup of tea." Severus led the way to the door and opened it. "Tataaa! Mom´s stock of potion ingredients. And a box of books."

Lily entered the small storeroom. Only one shelf contained things like tins of beans, the others were full of bunches of herbs, small bottles, jars and vials. "Oh my god!" the girl exclaimed. "Do you have an idea what we can do with all this stuff?"

"Actually I have. A pity we still can´t use wands."

"What´s in the book box?"

"No idea, I wanted to wait for you to have a look with me."

-x-

The box was big and heavy. They dragged it to the kitchen with united forces. "Oh, I wish we were allowed to use wands," Lily groaned as she leaned against the box with all her might.

"This will do," suggested Severus. "It will be easier to move the kitchen table a bit." He bent down and took the first book out of the box. It was dusty. The boy tried to blow it clean in order to be able to read the title.

"Hey, use a rag! This kitchen was cleaned only yesterday. You´re going to ruin all our potions if you keep behaving like that!" Lily scolded.

"Sorry!" Severus apologized. He uttered a low whistle. "Moste potente potions. It´s in the restricted area at Hogwarts."

"Don´t you think, this is a bit too advanced for us?"

"Probably. And we won´t be able to get our hands on the ingredients needed for those anyway. But reading the recipes will be interesting nevertheless." He took the next book from the box. Lily offered him a rag to dust it.

"Healing draughts." He scanned through the book quickly. "Look, the cough syrup we started with." Lily smiled.

They unpacked no less than twenty potions books, among them Mrs Snape´s old school books.

"Ha!" cried Lily cheerfully, when she discovered a fourth year potions book. "This is more like it. We can work through these in advance." She put the fourth year book on a stack of fifth, sixth and seventh year books.

"Let´s take the books on the shelves in the living room. There´s no more reason to hide them." Severus suggested. "I wonder, where mom kept the rest of her school books."

"She may have sold them," Lily pointed out. "You said, your parents were short of money. She may have sold them to feed the family."

"No, dad lost his job after I was born. She knew I would need school books. They must be somewhere in the house."

"Let´s set up our potions lab and search for the books another day. Mum will be concerned, if we don´t come back soon."

"Right, it´s time for lunch anyway. I´m starving."

-x-

It took them nearly a week to move all their potion material to the Snape house, store things away, make an inventory of Mrs Snape´s stocks and start brewing. Seeing that some of Mrs Snape´s things were old and would lose their powers soon, they decided to experiment on how to elongate the durability of ingredients. Severus found some chapters about this topic in his mother´s old fifth year book.

As most preservation methods were time consuming, they developed a habit of taking sandwiches to the lab for lunch and only return home for supper. Lily´s parents approved of the arrangement as it granted them some rather peaceful hours concerning Petunia. The girl cared less and less to hide her refusal of her magical sister and foster-brother. Meals became more of a battlefield at the Evans´ house as Lily and Severus were not ready to stand Petunia´s behavior in silence.

"I really could do with some quiet days," sighed Mrs Evans at breakfast after a particularly nasty scene had occured the previous evening. "I know, it´s not your fault, it´s Petunia´s, but I´m at my wits´ end. I´ve been talking to that girl for hours and hours, but she´s mulish."

"May I make a suggestion, Mrs Evans?" Severus asked.

"Anything that helps is welcome."

"My mother used to take me on hiking tours in the surrounding moor land. She collected herbs there. If you gave permission to me and Lily for such a tour, we´d be out for some days and you could have a break from trouble."

"You want to go out to the moors alone? No, no, dear, that´s out of question, you´re only thirteen years old and Lily won´t even be that for some weeks. You can´t go hiking alone for some days."

"But we´d be safe. We can take our wands."

"No, young man, no. This is my last word."

Petunia chose exactly this moment to enter the kitchen. "Still here?" she hissed at her sister.

"Yes, I am. By the way, we were just talking about using our wands."

Petunia dropped the plate she had just taken from the dresser. "How dare you mention your abnormity in my presence," she shrieked. "This was a threat! Admit it! Mum, she´s threatening me!" She grabbed an apple and fled from the kitchen.

"Tell me more about that hiking trip." Mrs Evans sighed.

Severus and Lily smiled at each other.

-x-

Mr Evans insisted on showing Severus how to pitch a tent. Mrs Evans packed a rucksack with sandwiches, tins and lemonade bottles for three days. Lily added a stack of small plastic bags for the herbs they were going to collect. After checking the weatherforecast what must have been for the hundreth time, Mr Evans put the tent, two sleeping bags and the rucksack into his boot and drove them to the moors. Before leaving, he checked once more on a map, where the children were going. Severus had to give his word, that they would stick to the planned route.

"That was pretty sly of you, to tell them we were taking our wands," said Lily, as she was walking beside Severus.

"It was pretty sly of you to never tell them, we weren´t allowed to use them at home." Severus pointed out. "Doesn´t that look like arnica? Let´s put down our rucksacks and collect some."

They collected herbs the whole day. By nightfall they had more than they could put into Lily´s rucksack. "Eat this," Lily held out a bag of sandwiches. "It will give us room for the herb bags."

"I can´t eat all that now. I´d explode!"

"Well," Lily sighed, "in that case, I´ll have to carry it. Find a place to pitch up the tent, please. I´m tired."

Severus did as he was told. "Here," he cried and waved to Lily from a short distance. "Here is a good place!"

The girl stamped over to him and dropped her rucksack on the spot. "Oh my god, I never knew hiking was this exhausting!" She dropped herself beside the rucksack.

Severus smiled. "I´ll take care of the tent. If you´ve recovered when I´m finished, you could make supper."

"Why is cooking always women´s work?"

"Because I´m pitching the tent. But we can change, if you prefer."

"You know pretty well, that I don´t know how the tent thing works. Why did dad choose you to explain it to?"

"Because cooking is women´s work and he thought I should be doing something. Oooops!"

Lily was fuming.

"Look," Severus continued, "if you like, I can show you how to pitch the tent today and tomorrow we reverse roles."

"OK, that sounds fair." Lily was appeased. "I´ll show you how to open a tin later."

The boy stared at her in disbelief, but didn´t dare to say anything.

-x-

Severus had the tent up within ten minutes. It would have been five, hadn´t he explained every move to Lily.

"That was interesting," the girl stated. "Are you hungry now?"

"I´m starving."

Lily rummaged in her rucksack. "Beans or goulash?" She presented two tins.

"You choose."

"Lentil-soup then."

"I didn´t know, we had lentil-soup."

"Sorry, but I have only two hands. Is lentil-soup OK with you?"

"It is, I like lentil-soup. Mom used to take it with us when we were hiking. It´s bringing back good memories."

"I´m glad it does." Lily smiled. "So, now look..."

"Lily, I do know, how to open a tin."

"Of course you do. Sorry." The girl put on the camping cooker and started warming the soup. "You have to stir it."

"I know."

"Shut up and hand me a bowl."

They crawled into their sleeping bags soon after their meal and Lily fell asleep immediately.

-x-

The girl awoke, when the scent of fresh coffee filled the tent. She sat up, stretched and moaned.

"Are you awake?" Severus asked from outside the tent. "I have breakfast ready."

"Mmmh," Lily growled and left the tent on all four. The sun was shining brightly and judging by its position it was well past ten.

"Why didn´t you wake me, it´s late!" Lily asked and got up on her feet.

"I´m not suicidal. You´re quite insufferable when you´re tired."

"I´m sorry, I´ve been a pest." Lily groaned. "Can I have some coffee?"

Severus handed her a cup. "Are you feeling better?" He watched the girl with concern.

"Yes, much better, thank you." Lily took a sip of coffee.

"We´ll leave our things here today and come back here in the evening. Things will be easier, if you don´t have to carry your rucksack."

"Isn´t that risky? Somebody could steal our things."

"I´ve never met one soul while I was hiking here. Nothing will be stolen."

"OK."

After breakfast Severus emptied Lily´s rucksack except the plastic bags for the herbs. Lily protested, when it became clear, that he intended to carry it, but he wouldn´t indulge. They picked herbs the whole afternoon and came back to their tent with plenty of prey. Severus started making bundles and suspending them from a string, which was attached to the bushes behind the tent and held already the crop of the previous day.

"When did you do that?" Lily asked.

"This morning. I´m an early bird."

"I should have helped!"

"You were tired. You don´t expect me to wake you, when I know you´ll be in a bad mood the whole day. It was easy work anyway."

"What do you want for supper? Goulash?"

"If you like it."

Lily started preparing the meal. They ate with a good appetite. The evening was warm, the air was fresh and perfumed with the scents of the drying herbs. Soon the first stars could be seen. Severus produced a star chart and a torch from his rucksack. "I thought, we could work on astronomy a bit," he explained. "Observing the stars is easier out here. There are no disturbing lights." He lit the torch and looked at his map of the nocturnal sky. Then he lay back and gazed at the sky.

"What are you looking for?" asked Lily.

"The dolphin."

"Let me have a look."

Severus handed her the chart and the torch. Lily studied the chart and lay back, too. After some minutes she exclaimed "There!" and pointed at the sky.

"Well done! I see it, too."

"Ah, this is uncomfortable. I wish I had a pillow."

"You can use my shoulder, if you want."

"This would be very uncomfortable for you."

"I´d do anything to keep you from being a pest again."

"How dare you!" Lily was up in the fraction of a second and pointed the torch at her friend. "You are a pest yourself!" she said in a soft voice when she saw his broad grin. She lay back down and rested her head against his shoulder. "I hope, I´m heavy."

"Now that you mention it... you are." They giggled and went on searching the sky for constellations.

-x-

They used the last morning of their trip to collect some more herbs. Lily found a sloe bush, which had already berries and they picked two small plastic bags of them. After a quick lunch Severus took down the tent and Lily packed their crop of herbs into her rucksack. They hiked back to the meeting point they had fixed with Mr Evans, who turned up early and was quite relieved to see them.

"How was your trip?" he asked after packing their luggage into the car. He looked at the two hikers in the rear-view mirror.

"Wonderful, dad. How was your magic-free time?"

"Relaxing, though we missed the two of you." Mr Evans smiled. "Did you find herbs?"

"Plenty of them. Lily even found some sloe. It is used for healing draughts."

"I´m glad to hear your trip was a success. Your mother will be waiting with supper."

"Mr Evans, can you please discharge the herbs at my house?"

"Of course. Did things go well with the tent?"

"Yes, Sir. Your explanations prooved very useful."

Severus returned to his house after supper to unpack and store away the herbs.

-x-

The next weeks were filled with experimenting with preservation of ingredients and trips to the near forest. Severus developed a habit of noting things down directly in his mother´s old books, which annoyed Lily.

"Nobody can read that. Look at that tiny handwriting of yours. You have to be a seer to read that," she scolded.

"It´s easier that way," the boy replied. " We don´t have to search books and notebooks for information. Everything is in one place and the books even have an index. You just need some practice with my handwriting."

In the middle of August two book lists arrived at the Evans´ home and Mrs Evans decided to go to diagon alley the next day. This time Lily and Severus watched out for Black and his friends. They couldn´t avoid being seen together, but this year they wanted to make sure, they were not surprised by a confrontation back at school. They were lucky. As Mrs Evans had chosen to get their books early, only few students and their parents were in the shops. None of the Gryffindor four was among them.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: New subjects

Getting two large Hogwarts trunks and two students into Mr Evans´ car turned out to be difficult. The two trunks together were just one tiny bit too much for the boot, so they had to put one trunk on the back seat. Mrs Evans hugged the two children good-bye and helped Lily squeeze in the back beside the trunk. Severus had to take the front seat.

At King´s Cross Mr Evans and Severus went for trollies and took the luggage to the train, where Mr Evans put the two trunks into two compartments without being asked to. "Housemates," he smiled. He hugged both children and left. Severus went to his compartment and burried himself in a book. Lily jumped back to the platform and went looking for Myra.

Myra and her parents seemed to be late, but Lily met Kassandra and pointed her towards the compartment she had taken. "Hello, Lily," a soft voice said suddenly behind her. Lily jumped.

"Oh my god, you startled me! Hello Remus!" Lily looked out for Black and the others, but the only people with Lupin were a tall wizard with light brown hair and a small, slender witch, who had the same nose as the boy. "Are these your parents?"

Lupin nodded. "Mum, dad, this is Lily Evans. She´s in my year and house."

Lily greeted the Lupins politely. "Have you seen Myra?" she asked turning back to her classmate.

"No, James and Sirius aren´t here yet either." The boy smiled shyly.

"Oh, what a pity. Well, I´ll go to my compartment. Kassandra is already here and I think I saw Eloise, too. Good bye, Mrs and MrLupin!" Lily returned to the train.

Myra nearly missed the train. The steam engine had already given its parents-off-the-train whistle, when she jumped on the train and her father heaved her trunk through the door. In fact, he had to jump off the train when it started to move.

"That was close," she panted. "We had to go back, when we were halfway to London. My idiot brother forgot half of his things. He´s a first year."

"Relax," said Eloise and offered a box of every flavour beans. "If you are lucky, he´ll be sorted into a different house."

"I wish he was," sighed Myra."But he´s too stupid for Ravenclaw and too lazy for Hufflepuff. Hey, just a moment. He could be a Slytherin, stupid and lazy, that fits." The girls laughed, but Lily didn´t join in. "Oh, come on, Lily," giggled Myra. "I will admit, that not all of them are stupid and lazy, but most are."

They spent the rest of the journey picturing Myra´s little brother in different houses. In the evening Myles was sorted into Gryffindor.

-x-

The next morning professor McGonagall handed out timetables to her students after breakfast. Lily was waiting on tenterhooks to get hers as she hoped to have her new subjects with the Slytherin students. She got her wish. Care of Magical Creatures was a Gryffindor/Slytherin class and Ancient Runes was an all-houses class. So she had now a total of three classes where she would see Severus and plenty of opportunities to exchange signs.

Care of Magical Creatures was the first class of the year and Lily liked it from the very beginning. Professor Kettleburn explained, what creatures were used for and what was most important about caring for them. He then asked them to open their books and read the chapter on flobberworms. Their first assignment was to breed these creatures.

Ancient Runes, which was the last class on Wednesday afternoon, turned out to be even better. As the subject had the reputation to be very difficult, it was chosen by only few students. Lily and Myra turned out to be the only Gryffindors, there was nobody from Hufflepuff house, fifteen students from Ravenclaw and – last but not least – one single Slytherin. Professor Stonecarver, a very old witch with white hair and more wrinkles than allowed, told them to form groups of three, as they would be using old dictionaries, which were school property and she had not enough to give one to each student.

"These books are very old and valuable," she said. "you will use them only in class. For your homework you will use your own dictionaries, which are less detailed than these, but they will have to do. If your homework contains words not to be found in your own books I shall warn you, so that you can copy from the school dictionary what you´ll need. Groups will not be changed. Each group is responsible for its book. I shall know, who's to blame for any damage to one of these books. Find your partners now."

The Ravenclaws quickly formed groups of three and Lily, Myra and Severus were left to be the last group. They settled down at a table with broad grins. "I bet, the two of you enjoy that," whispered Myra. Lily nodded and Severus looked pleased like a cat who has just caught a mouse.

They started with some basic grammar and words. It soon became clear, that they wouldn´t really need the special dictionaries for months. Nevertheless, professor Stonecarver made them look up every single word in both dictionaries, their own and the school´s. "You see," she explained, "that even with the most simple words, these books," she pointed at her own copy, "give more different meanings than the student´s edition. I want you to copy them down."

When they finally left the classroom, their heads were spinning with strange words and their bags were heavy with notes. "This could be my favorite subject," remarked Lily.

"I knew it would, when I saw who was there and who wasn´t." Myra grinned.

"No, don´t be silly. It´s interesting. That we work with Severus is a bonus."

"Of course, dear, a very, very tiny bonus." Myra didn´t believe a word. "But you´re right, it´s interesting."

-x-

Lily expected troubles with the Black group as soon as they´d hear that she, Myra and Severus had become a study group at Runes, but nothing happened.

"I thought they´d try to bully us about that," she said to Myra at Saturday breakfast. "Did they say anything to you?"

"No," Myra shook her head. "Not a word. What?" She turned around to face her brother, who had pulled her by the sleeve. "No, I can´t do your Charms homework for you, stupid. You do it yourself. What do you mean, you can´t? Are you a wizard or not?" She sighed. "I´ll help you in the afternoon. Now leave me alone."

"Aren´t you a bit rude to him?" Lily asked.

"No, I know him. If I help him too readyly, he´ll be really annoying. I tell you, you give him your little finger and he´ll take your hand. Do you think they went for Severus?" she resumed their topic.

"I hope not. He looks OK." Lily scratched her left ear automatically and Severus returned the sign.

"Maybe they still remember the message from last year. I´ll buy Angelique an extra Christmas present, if they do."

"Or they finally realized, it´s none of their business. Anyway, let´s enjoy the way it is."

-x-

Most astonishingly Black and his group remained silent for the next couple of weeks. They were seen in the library more frequently than before. Obviously they were working hard on something and Lily had a feeling, it wasn´t anything good. But as neither she nor her friends had any chance to find out, what it was all about, they enjoyed the quiet time. Gryffindor even got in the lead concerning house points as nobody disturbed students doing their homework.

Ancient Runes actually became one of Lily´s favorite subjects. She enjoyed translating texts and when professor Stonecarver brought the description of an old charm to work on in December, Lily was enthusiastic. By the end of the lesson she had not only translated the incantation and required wand movement, but also mastered the spell, earning her ten points for Gryffindor.

Christmas came soon and passed quickly. The break was spent quietly at home. Lily and Severus didn´t go to the Snape house, as it was bitter cold and Severus had bad recollections concerning chopping wood. He even agreed to sleep on the air-mattress once again. As they couldn´t work on their potions, they spent most of the time in Lily´s room, reading their Runes textbooks. By the end of the break they had a whole list of words to look up in their school dictionary.

-x-

Professor Stonecarver was more than happy to see, that her students had been working during their holidays. She allowed Lily and Severus to stay behind after the lesson to look up some words and awarded each of them five points for their houses.

"Oh, dears, look what time it is," she cried from her desk, where she had been grading essays, all of a sudden. "You´ll have to run, if you want supper. Quickly, go, or you´ll stay hungry."

Lily and Severus crammed their parchments, quills and inkbottles into their bags and set out for the Great Hall. They hurried down the stairs and entered the hall together. Each went to their house table and grabbed something to eat just in time before the house-elves removed the food. Lily was just taking a forkful of potato, when Black and Pettigrew took the seats on her left and right.

"Well, it seems we have to remind you to stay away from certain people." Black hissed and took a carrot from Lily´s plate.

"Remind you..." added Pettigrew and helped himself to a carrot, too.

Lily saw, that Severus got to his feet at the Slytherin table. Quickly she removed a strand of red hair from her face, letting him know, that she could handle this on her own. With relief she saw him sit back down.

"I´d appreciate you stay away from my plate," Lily said in a very calm voice. "And it´s none of your business, whom I talk to. I told you before."

"You´re really hopeless, Evans," sneered Black and took another piece of carrot. "What can I do to impress on you that we´re concerned for your own good?" Pettigrew reached for a carrot, too. Lily hit his knuckles with her fork.

He jumped back and fell off the bench backward. "Ouch, that hurt! She-devil!" he whined.

Black lay back in his seat to get a better view. "You know, you´re really pathetic, Peter?" he shook his head.

"As are you," Lily growled and dropped her fork. She got up and headed for the entrance.

"Hey Evans, what about supper?" Black called after her.

"I´ve lost my appetite." Just as she reached the door, she was stopped by a loud rattling. She turned round and saw Black wiping the remains of her meal from his face. Her first thought was, that Severus had lost his temper, but a quick glance told her, that he was as surprised as she was. Just when she wanted to go on to Gryffindor tower, she saw him signal to meet him in the trophy room.

-x-

Lily had to wait for some minutes. She started questioning Severus as soon as he entered the trophy room.

"Was that you? Did you throw that plate at Black?"

The boy nodded. "I think so."

"What do you mean by ´I think so´. You must know, whether you used a spell on Black."

"I´m not sure. I didn´t use my wand, but the plate did exactly what I wished it would do."

Lily stared at Severus in disbelief. "You did wandless magic? Wow! You´ve been fourteen only last week!"

"There´s still a chance, somebody else did, what I wished for."

"Can you try it again?"

"I suppose not. Emotion is important for wandless magic. I´m not angry now."

"This is impressive. You´re going to be a very powerful wizard, Severus."

The boy smiled.

"Angelique thought, she saw you perform a nonverbal spell last year. I forgot to ask you. Did you?"

"I´ve been doing nonverbals for more than a year."

"Wow! Soon Black and his cronies will be running from you. Why didn´t you tell me?"

"I couldn´t at school and I forgot at home. Sorry. I should have told you."

"Is there anything else? I´m really hungry. I think, I have some chocolate in my dormitory."

"Oh, I forgot." Severus produced a muffin from the pocket of his robes. "I thought, you´d be hungry."

"Thank you, but aren´t you hungry yourself?"

"You take it. I had some stew. I can do without dessert."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: A surprising invitation

February was nearing its end, when Lily and Myra were called to Dumbledore´s office. The headmaster was sitting behind his desk, reading a letter, when the girls entered.

"Ah, the ladies Bones and Evans," he smiled and viewed them over the rims of his glasses. "Sit down." He motioned them towards two armchairs. The girls sat down.

"I got this most interesting letter concerning the two of you from Beauxbatons Academy. It´s uttering an invitation for a year as guest students for both of you. I understand they are following the recommendation of Mr Aureus Dupont, Head of the Department for International Cooperation at the French Ministry of Magic, whose daughter Angelique spent some months with us last year. Seemingly Miss Dupont is missing you dearly. Mr Dupont himself offers quarters to both of you during Christmas and Easter break."

Myra beamed. "Dear uncle Aureus! He knows how much I like France! Oh, this will be great!"

Lily was speechless. A year in France?

"Well, Miss Evans? Obviously Miss Bones is more than willing to accept the offer. What about you?"

"I´d like to, but I have to ask my parents first, Sir."

"Of course, your parents will be informed and the final decision rests with them. Nevertheless, your opinion is of importance."

Lily gave it some thought. "It would be very interesting and I´d be able to learn a lot. I think, I´d like very much to go."

Dumbledore smiled. "I was hoping you would say so. Beauxbatons utters these invitations on very rare occasions. Declining it could mean we have to wait for a very long time for the next one. So, it´s settled. I´ll ask your head of house to speak to your parents."

-x-

Lily and Myra were enthusiatic. They started making plans for their year abroad, with special emphasis on the holidays, immediately.

Lily´s enthusiasm was subdued by the hurt look on Severus´s face when she told him about the invitation during their next runes class.

"I won´t go, if you want me to stay," she offered.

"Don´t be silly," Severus shook his head. "this is an unique opportunity. Of course you´re going."

"But you look sad." Lily leafed through her dictionary as the professor was watching them.

"Of course I do. I´ll miss you. The whole family will miss you. Hand me that book please, Myra." He took the school dictionary and looked up a word. "Thanks." He handed the book back. "Well," the boy grinned, "maybe not Petunia, but the rest will." Suddenly he shook with laughter. Myra and Lily looked at Severus in bewilderment. The professor got up from her seat and walked over to them. "One point from Slytherin, Snape," she said severely. "Calm down, boy."

Severus wiped tears off his eyes. "Sorry, professor. I made a mistake in my translation. It was so ridiculous." He made a serious face. "I need that dictionary again, please."

"What was that about?" asked Lily as soon as professor Stonecarver had returned to her desk.

"I just imagined Petunia releasing balloons and throwing confetti when she learns you´ll be gone for a whole year."

"You´re a monster, you know that?"

"Maybe, but this monster wants letters from France."

"Promised."

-x-

"So, you want to go to France. Professor McGonagall says these invitations are really rare. You know we´ll miss you." Mr Evans watched his daughter. After an opulent Easter dinner he was having a glass of wine in the living room.

"I´ll miss you, too. But I won´t be alone. Myra was invited, too. The family we´ll be staying with is her uncle´s. You met his daughter at King´s Cross. Please, can I go, dad?"

"Of course, if you want to. I´ll give you a letter to professor McGonagall. She offered to arrange everything for you."

"A pity they didn´t invite him, too," sneered Petunia. Her mother had made her stay downstairs and she was determined to make her forced presence as uncomfortable for everyone as possible.

"It is," agreed Mrs Evans. "Lily will learn a lot in France. It really is a pity that Severus can´t go, too."

"I´ve plenty to learn here, too, Mrs Evans." Severus reassured her.

"When will you be leaving, Lily, dear?"

"The sooner, the better," Petunia murmured just one touch too loud.

"I´m not sure, mum, but I think that I´ll be here for a week in summer and then we´re going to the Duponts´ summer residence."

"They have a summer residence?"

"Mr Dupont is Head of Department at the French ministry. I understand his family is rather wealthy."

"And when will you be back?"

"In August next year. I´m not sure which day, but I think it was at the beginning of the month."

"Oh, no. Why aren´t you going directly from France to that freak school?"

"This will do, Petunia. You go to your room. Now." Mrs Evans shot her older daughter a furious look.

"If I´m lucky, she´ll get lost in France. As far as I know, she doesn´t speak one word French." Petunia smirked and set out for her room.

Mr and Mrs Evans looked concerned. "You forget I´m a witch." Lily hissed after Petunia. Her sister gave a tiny shriek and smashed the door closed.

-x-

They talked about how things went at school for a while, but soon Severus got up and announced that he was going over to his parents´ house. Lily rose, too, and asked her parents´ permission to go on a short walk.

"You know," she said and closed the door behind her, "Petunia has a point. I don´t speak French. Do you know, if there´s a magic way to learn a language quickly? Or should I start studying?"

"I have no idea. But I´m sure Dumbledore won´t overlook a crucial detail like this. You can rely on that." They walked a short distance in silence. "Will you come to the lab tomorrow? I read something about essential oils I would like to try out."

"Why not, but we have to be careful. You can´t do wandless magic or we´ll be in serious trouble."

"I don´t think I can do it anyway. I tried, but I didn´t succeed."

"Didn´t you say you were angry at that time?"

"You´re not going to make me angry, are you?"

"Well, I´ll try not to. I´d better go back now. Good night."

"Good night."

-x-

They experimented with distilling essential oils the whole week. It had to be done with fresh herbs. Luckily the weather had been sunny and warm for some time and Lily´s patch offered some fresh cress already. After using up the cress, they went for Mrs Evans´ stock of parsley until they were thrown out of the kitchen. In the end the break turned out too short as usual and all too soon they were back at school.

Lily gave her parents´ letter to professor McGonagall, who started organizing her year abroad immediately.

One day Lily was called to her office to get a big bag of things her parents had sent for her to take to France. "But why are they sending them here? I´ll be with them in summer for a week before going, won´t I?" the girl asked.

"You will, but your luggage will be sent to France from here. It´s easier than the muggle way," the professor informed her. "You´ll pack your trunk for France before going home. You´ll be picked up there. Your luggage will be taken to the Dupont residence beforehand."

-x-

A week later, Lily and Myra were told to stay behind after transfiguration.

"We´ve got these registration forms from Beauxbatons. Their students choose additional subjects in their fourth year. We have to make sure, you´ll be able to follow fifth year lessons when you come back. I checked their curriculum. You´ll have to sign up for fifth year runes at Beauxbatons. For magical creatures the fourth year course will do, they start with different creatures than we do. Do you want to sign up for anything more?"

Myra shook her head, but Lily nodded. "Please, professor, I was told they´re teaching Latin at Beauxbatons. Is it possible for me to attend a Latin class?"

McGonagall looked at the papers at her desk. "It seems it is. As you are a top student at Ancient Runes, it seems a good idea. Would you like to take Latin, too, Miss Bones? Your grades in Runes aren´t bad either, I see."

Myra gave it some thought and finally agreed.

"I thought so," McGonagall noted Myra´s registration down. "This Saturday you´ll learn French. You´ll be at professor Slughorn´s office at exactly 9:30. It is crucial that you are not late."

"Yes, Professor McGonagall."

"You may go now."

"Thank you, professor."

-x-

Lily and Myra knocked at professor Slughorn´s door at exactly 9:29 on Saturday morning. The professor opened immediately. The room was rather crowded as there were also professors McGonagall and Dumbledore and a wizard, whom neither Lily nor Myra knew.

"Come in, girls, come in, don´t be shy," professor Dumbledore beamed at them. "This is Barthemius Crouch from the ministry. Barty, these young ladies are our exchange students to be." They shook hands. "Professor Slughorn," Dumbledore went on, "has made some Babel potion for us." He pointed at a small cauldron on Slughorn´s desk. "It takes some weeks to make and it can not be stored. When it´s ready, which will be in 20 minutes, we have but five minutes before it´s efficacy will cease. What you have to do, is simple. You take a spoonful of potion and speak the words ´loquere French´. After this, you speak French. The only thing you have to work on is your accent. Any questions?"

The girls shook their heads. The professor nodded and started handing out spoons. "Everything must be done quickly once the potion is ready," he said. "Horace, how much time?"

Professor Slughorn took a closer look at the surface of the potion. "Be ready," he advised, "I think I see the first traces of yellow fumes."

"Queue up," Dumbledore ordered. Mr Crouch was the first in their line, then came Lily, then Myra and after her professors McGonagall and Dumbledore.

"It´s ready, Barty," announced professor Slughorn at last. "Quickly!"

Mr Crouch took a spoonful of potion and cried "loquere Troll" before he stepped aside to make room for Lily.

Lily and after her Myra took their potion and cried "loquere French" as they had been told to do. Lily was curious to hear, which languages her teachers chose to learn.

Professor McGonagall cried "loquere Mermish" and Dumbledore himself "loquere Giantish". Professor Slughorn had chosen Spanish.

Soon after Slughorn had taken his spoonful, the fumes of the remaining potion turned from yellow to pink and the smell of honey filled the office. "This was it," cried Slughorn and clapped his hands. "All this can be used for now is polishing silver. I shall give it to the elves."

Mr Crouch took his leave immediately. "Troll?" murmured professor McGonagall to the headmaster just a touch too loud. "He´s wasting Babel potion on Troll? All you have to do is point at things and grunt."

"Minerva!" the headmaster was scandalized. "Troll is a very complex language."

"How can you know?" asked the professor. "As far as I know, you don´t speak Troll."

"Of course I speak Troll!" Dumbledore pointed at Slughorn´s desk and grunted.

Lily and Myra giggled. Dumbledore smiled at them with sparkling eyes. "Young ladies," he said. "You speak French now. You may go to lunch."

Lily felt no difference, but she assumed Dumbledore was right. So now she was able to speak French. From the wizarding point of view learning languages was fairly easy.

-x-

"I´ve looked it up in the library," she informed Severus during their next runes lesson. "It´s called Babel potion. It takes long to make it, but the recipe is not complicated. It only has to boil for more than twenty days. The problem is, that it can´t be stored. Everything you don´t use within five minutes is lost. And you can only take one spoonful a day. There´s an incantation, too. The crucial ingredient, which is hard to lay hands on, is a small yellow fish." She sliped him a piece of parchment. "I copied this from the library book. I thought, you might want to read it."

Severus examined the parchment. "Wow, you have been industrious. And you´re speaking French now?"

"I´m not sure, I didn´t try yet."

"Try now."

"Je ne sais pas, comment."

"What?"

"I don´t know how."

"Wow, you spoke French!"

"Wow!"

-x-

June passed quickly with studying for the exams. Soon Lily had to pack her trunk. The house-elves had done her laundry and professor McGonagall had got her a parcel of books, which she would need, from Diagon Alley. It was strange to go home for summer with no luggage but a small bag with sandwiches and pumpkin juice.

Lily and Severus spent more time than usual at the Evans´ house. They helped her mother preparing the meals and had long conversations with her father in the evening. As it got late, the air-mattress was once more in use.

"You know, Severus," Mr Evans said one evening. "I think, you should take Lily´s room while she´s in France. I could teach you chess in the evenings, if you like that."

"Chess? That would be great, Sir."

-x-

To everybody´s surprise it was professor Dumbledore himself, who came to pick Lily up. He explained to her parents once again how he would be taking their daughter to Aix-en-Provence, where the Dupont summer residence was and how to contact him in case anything unforeseen occured. Lily hugged her parents and Severus good bye (Petunia prefered to stay in her room) and off they went.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: France

They materialized on a hill near the town of Aix in the middle of blooming lavender fields. The air was hot and heavy with the flowers´ scent. The sun seemed more harsh than at home and the deafening chirping of crickets was in sharp contrast to the otherwise peaceful landscape. Lily blinked and let go of the professor´s arm.

"Here we are," cried Dumbledore cheerfully. "The Dupont residence is down there." He pointed at a small farmhouse built of grey stone between a group of trees at the foot of the hill. "Let´s go." He led the way.

Lily had to run to keep up with the headmaster. His legs were considerably longer than hers and he wasn´t wasting time by staring at the violett fields. When they reached the house, Lily was panting. "Sorry, Miss Evans," Dumbledore apologized, "I got carried away by my wish to leave this heat quickly. Old age prefers mild conditions." He wiped his forehead.

Dumbledore knocked at the door and they were let in by a young girl of about eight years with short red hair. "Professor Dumbledore, Miss Evans," she greeted them politely, "my parents are already waiting for you. Please follow me." She led the way to a patio at the back side of the house, where several people were having breakfast. Among them were Angelique, Myra and her father.

"Lily!" Angelique and Myra hastened to meet her as soon as they saw her. Angelique positioned an empty chair between hers and Myra´s and urged Lily to sit down and have breakfast with them.

"I have to meet your parents first," whispered Lily.

"Ah, yes," Angelique nodded. "Mum, dad, that´s Lily. Now," she continued, barely giving her parents time to say hello, "you´ve met them. Have some coffee."

Professor Dumbledore was greeted warmly by the Duponts and Mr Bones and invited for breakfast as well.

"Did you meet all my daughters?" asked Aureus Dupont. "You know me oldest, Angelique, of course. And these are Aurelia, Lavender and Augustine." He pointed at the girls as he said their names. "Aurelia will be starting at Beauxbatons this autumn."

Dumbledore smiled at the girl. "So, if she´s doing well, we´ll have another Dupont exchange student in a couple of years." He took a sip of coffee.

The headmaster left as soon as it wouldn´t be considered an offence. He claimed to have a meeting with a Gurg.

-x-

After breakfast Angelique showed Lily and Myra, who turned out to have arrived barely ten minutes before Lily, their rooms. They were luxurious. The interior of the house resembled a palace rather than the simple farmhouse it was from the outside.

"We're going to the beach in the afternoon." Angelique informed them. "We´ll be apparating to the Mediterranian Sea. It´s not far from here. We´re going there nearly every day."

"Why aren´t you living at the seaside then?" Lily asked.

"Mum. She loves the Provence and the flower fields. She works as a perfumer at a muggle factory. Seeing that she´s a great potion brewer, she´s very successful at her job."

-x-

The day at the beach was fun. Lily had never been to the seaside before. Her parents prefered the Scottish highlands for holidays. When they came back, a surprise waited for Lily and Myra. Each was given a large barn owl as a welcome present.

"I think, these will turn out useful," said Mrs Dupont. "They can carry heavy parcels and even a snowstorm will not stop them from crossing the English channel. I didn´t want you to have unexperienced birds, so they have already names. This," she gave a cage with the biggest owl Lily had ever seen to her, "is D´Artagnan. And this," a second cage went to Myra, "is Amor."

"Thank you, Mrs Dupont."

"Lily, dear, why don´t you call me aunt Rose?"

"Thank you, aunt Rose."

-x-

A week later D´Artagnan was on his first delivery to England. He carried a letter to Lily´s parents, telling them about the beach and the Dupont home and how friendly the family was. His second letter was to Severus. The beach was barely mentioned. Instead it held a detailed description of a visit to a perfume factory at Grasse and how the perfumers there worked with essential oils. The most important delivery was a small brown parcel containing a book about the perfume making techniques used in southern France.

The bird came back with a single letter in Severus´s tiny handwriting. He thanked Lily for the book, informed her about his improvement as a chess player and delivered her parents´ greetings.

Lily let the owl barely rest. It was not looking too happy, when the girl attached a huge parcel of dried lavender to its leg.

-x-

August was nearing its end when a beautiful snowy owl brought four letters to the Dupont residence.

"Your Beauxbatons book lists," said Mrs Dupont. "So, it´s time we return to Paris."

Packing took her about ten minutes and a couple of wand waves. Less than half an hour after the delivery of the letters the whole Dupont household arrived on the lawn of the Dupont city residence, which turned out to be a castle near the banks of the Loire river.

They went to the city of Paris the same afternoon. Mrs Dupont took Angelique, Myra, Lily and Aurelia to the Eiffel tower. They took the staircase to the platform, but after some steps Mrs Dupont touched some screws with her wand and a passage to the Ruelle des Secrets, the French version of Diagon Alley, opened.

The street was very similar to Diagon Alley, the biggest difference was in the number of shops selling robes and chocolates. The largest building was not home of a wizarding bank, but of a shop selling delicacies from all over France. The windows showed bottles of wine and cheeses but also small tins of liver spread.

Mrs Dupont took them to a robes shop first. She insisted on paying Lily and Myra´s light blue school robes as well as her daughter´s. Lily was concerned about causing cost, but Myra reassured her. "Uncle Aureus is rolling in gold. Just take the robes and say ´Thank you´."

Their next stop was an apothecary´s. Mrs Dupont bought four sets of potions equipment for beginners and three for advanced students. "It´s quicker than listing what you´re short of," she explained. As Lily hadn´t to pay again, she spent some of her money on a vial of attar of roses for Severus.

At the book shop Mrs Dupont wanted to buy a complete set of books for Lily, but she refused. "I have most of my books already. In fact, I only need a Latin textbook. It would be very kind of you, aunt Rose, if I could get a second one."

"What would you need a second Latin book for?"

"A friend at home is interested in Latin, too. I´d like to give it to him as a present."

"Your friend is a ´him´, oh lala!" Mrs Dupont exclaimed. "Angelique, you should take a leaf out of Lily´s book. She´s barely fourteen and has found herself a boyfriend. I´m always telling you, a woman needs a man to bewitch."

Lily blushed.

"She´s talking about her brother, mum." Angelique said.

"Oh, sorry, but why are you calling your brother a friend?" Mrs Dupont was confused.

"He´s not really my brother," Lily explained. "My parents got custody after his died. We were friends before."

"I see. Not really your brother," Mrs Dupont said with a triumphant grin. "Is he cute?"

"He´s not," Angelique interfered. "But I saw him cast nonverbal spells at the age of twelve."

"Oh lala, you stick to him, Lily dear," Mrs Dupont whispered conspiratoryly. "This boy is going to be very powerful. He will fulfill your fondest dreams. Who cares about cute!"

"I´m a witch myself, aunt Rose!"

"I know, dear. But you´ll see, it´s more fun that way." Mrs Dupont winked and bought the second book.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Beauxbatons Academy

Mr Dupont took the girls to school via apparition himself. A young wizard, Pierre, who worked for him at the ministry brought their trunks, in Angelique and Aurelia´s case Louis Vuitton suitcases.

Beauxbatons Academy was in a castle, but it reminded Lily more of the Cinderella castle she had seen at Eurodisney earlier this summer than of Hogwarts castle. The grounds surrounding the castle held a lake, which was spotted with water lilies. The lawns were trimmed and flower patches were scattered over them. Lily was very sure, that this castle had no dungeons.

The headmistress herself came to the entrance to greet Mr Dupont. "Aureus!" cried the old witch, who was wearing her long silver hair in a ponytail like a young girl. "What a pleasure. You´re bringing the young ladies from England!" She smiled at the girls.

"Carole! It is so kind of you to come down from your office!" Mr Dupont kissed the witch on her cheeks. "You´ll forgive me I can´t stay. I have to meet with the Austrian ambassador. We have a little difference about importing cheese."

The headmistress dismissed him with a nod. She then clapped her hand and the biggest woman Lily had ever seen came to the entrance hall. "This is professor Maxime!" the headmistress explained. "She´s responsible for you this year. You will seek her advice in all questions of education and," she looked over Lily and Myra critically, "fashion, I suggest, as well. Olympe, they are yours." She nodded at the girls and went up the stairs. Lily had no idea how she did it, but it looked more like gliding than walking.

Professor Maxime greeted them friendly. "You take your luggage and follow me," she ordered. "I´ll show you your rooms first. You may use your wands."

Lily took her wand, pointed it at her trunk and murmured "Locomotor trunk!". Myra did the same. Professor Maxime seemed pleased. She led the way upstairs to a luxurious room with two four-posters with light pink curtains in it. "I heard that you are used to sleeping in groups. We don´t do that here. Beauxbatons has only twin-bedded rooms," she explained. "These curtains will clash with your hair. That´s better." She waved her wand and the curtains changed to light green. "You may unpack your things now. Supper is served at exactly six o´clock. The dining-room is on the first floor on the right. Be punctual."

She headed for the door, where she turned around. "Ah, I nearly forgot. We never wear pigtails. We´d look like little girls rather than young ladies. A ponytail would be acceptable."

-x-

Lily and Myra unpacked their trunks. Each had a huge cupboard of her own. They changed their hairstyle before going down to supper. Myra tied her brown hair in a ponytail, but Lily left hers open.

After supper professor Maxime gave them their timetables. "We had some difficulties, because you need the advanced course in Ancient Runes, but we managed," she explained. "I´ll show you, where your classrooms are. Come."

She showed them around the castle. "Are there any questions?" she finally asked.

"Yes, professor," said Lily. "Will you be teaching us, too? What is your subject?"

"You will address me Madame. And I´ll be your Care of Magical Creature teacher."

-x-

Lessons started the next morning. They were slightly different from those at Hogwarts. Although the level was very high, each professor took his or her time to give the students advice on how to handle things without disturbing their hairstyle, dirtying their robes or impairing their appearance in any other way.

Professor Maxime lectured them about manicure for twenty minutes in their first lesson. "Handling bowtruckles is no excuse for splintered finger nails," she said. "You may want to ask professor Fraudeur for his recipe for protective nail polish."

Professor Fraudeur was the Beauxbatons potions teacher. He was the youngest teacher and had curly blonde hair. His cheeks were always rosy and behind his back the students giggled, because he was permanently on the run from his female colleagues.

The first things he taught his new students was a spell to prevent long hair from dangling into a cauldron and a recipe for moisturizing hand-cream to use after chopping up ingredients. And how to make protective nail-polish, of course.

"He´s so cute!" Angelique pointed out after the lesson. "I like the way he says ´dragonblood´." She sighed. "Oh, look!"

Professor Baguette-Magique, the Charms teacher, was approaching the classroom just as professor Fraudeur was locking the door. "Aimé," she called, "may I ask you a question, please?"

Professor Fraudeur continued his work on the door hectically. "I´m afraid, I´m in a hurry, Camille!" he cried.

"Oh, what a pity," professor Baguette-Magique purred. She leaned against the door-post and watched her colleague´s fight with the key with mock interest. "You need help?" She curled a strand of black hair around her index finger.

"No, thank you, Camille." Aimé Fraudeur took out his wand and pointed it at the lock. "See you at supper." And off he was. Camille giggled.

"Pathetic," Angelique murmured and led her friends to the lawn, where the students usually spent their lunch-break. ("Never miss an opportunity to get a healthy complexion!")

-x-

D´Artagnan was a very busy bird. He carried letters and parcels over the channel at least twice a months. The heaviest was the Christmas parcel to the Evans family. It contained French wine and cheese for Mr and Mrs Evans, a vial of longlasting pink nail-polish for Petunia (Lily didn´t mention, that she brewed it herself, or her sister wouldn´t have used it) and the Latin book and a couple of full vials for Severus. Enclosed were letters to all family members, Petunia´s was the shortest.

The bird came back with a large fruitcake from Mrs Evans, a pretty green sweater from Mr Evans, a small vial of rose perfume from Severus (brewed it myself using the attar of roses you sent me, a note said) and a card from Petunia (I don´t like pink. Merry Christmas.)

-x-

Lily used Severus´s perfume only once. Its smell was seductive and Lily had to answer questions about it the whole day.

It started at Potions. Professor Fraudeur was just checking on the potion Lily was brewing, when he sniffed. "What´s that perfume you´re using, Lily?" he asked. "Where did you get it?"

"A friend made it for me, Monsieur." Lily answered.

"This is superb." The professor moved closer and drew a breath. "The subtlety of the scent of rose. Do I smell a small note of lemon?" He sniffed. Behind him the girls giggled. "Your friend must be a very experienced potion master. A fatherly friend, I assume?"

Lily blushed. "Actually, he´s fifteen, Monsieur Fraudeur."

"A very talented boy," the professor remarked and moved on to Myra´s cauldron.

On the way to the Transfiguration classroom Lily had to answer questions from her fellow students about the mysterious potions master. She thought that the interviews were over when the professor entered the classroom, but she was wrong. The first half of the lesson was spent discussion perfumes, the second with transfiguring used wine bottles into beautiful spray flacons. It was annoying.

It got even worse, when professor Baguette-Magique tried to order some of the perfume. Worst was professor Maxime, who after hearing who was the potion-maker, droned on about the greatness of friendship and hinted, that she´d never have thought – considering Lily´s neglected appearance – the girl would ever get any boy´s attention.

In the evening Myra, Lily and Angelique were having a private chat in Lily and Myra´s room.

"What a day!" Lily sighed. "That was so embarassing!"

"It could have been worse," Angelique pointed out.

"I don´t see how."

The two cousins grinned at each other. "Someone could have told them about the night he spent in your bed." Myra said innocently.

Lily was shocked. "You wouldn´t do that!"

"Of course not, but I like to picture it." Myra laughed. "Oh lala, you have to tell me how you lured that potions master..." she curled a strand around her finger in an excellent imitation of professor Baguette-Magique.

Lily and Angelique laughed hard.

-x-

At Easter D´Artagnan had to master a particular long way as the Duponts took their children and guests on a trip to Italy and Greece.

The girls admired the antique buildings, especially an old palace on Crete island, which had been a school for witchcraft and wizardry up to the fourth century. They even found some mural paintings, which Lily recognized as descriptions of ancient charms. She took photos with her muggle camera to try and translate them at home.

She also collected lots of potions ingredients like Greek olive oil, bile of squid ("Unbelievable, those muggle just throw this away," said Mrs Dupont and bought some herself from a very bewildered muggle fisherman.) and Italian volcano ash ("Look at that, just lying on the ground!").

The poor bird was loaded as a mule, when it took off. It returned when Lily was back to Beauxbatons castle. D´Artagnan delivered his letter and departed immediately to the owlery to avoid another assignment.

The letter was from Severus, who informed Lily that he had successfully invented his first spell using the information from her Latin textbook and used it to some effect on Sirius Black. "They are still occupied with whatever they were doing last year, so I´m having a rather quiet school year. See you soon," the letter said.

-x-

Unlike at Hogwarts the Beauxbatons exams were not before the end of July. Studying was hard with the sun burning down from the sky, but the teachers had advice for that, too. The students learned how to generate a bubble of cool air around themselves, how to avoid stringy hair and how to prevent it from bleaching in the sun.

The exams were very difficult. Professor Maxime deducted points from Myra for breaking a fingernail in the practical part of the test. Nevertheless both exchange students did very well. The headmistress herself led a round of applause for them when she handed them their reports. The teachers cheered when Lily threw back her long mane of shiny red hair before she accepted the small roll of parchment with some words of thank.

Mr Dupont picked the four girls up at the gate. Again, Pierre was there for the luggage. Lily and Myra spent a relaxing week at the Dupont summer residence.

The time to return to England came soon. On Sunday morning headmaster Dumbledore came down the hill. Lily hugged her host family and Myra, who would be staying some more days, and half an hour later she stood in front of her parents´ house.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Changes

"My girl!" Mrs Evans uttered a cry of joy and pulled Lily into a hug. "Let me look at you!" She held the girl at arm´s lenght. "You look radiant, dear! Come in! Everybody is waiting for you! Severus! Help me with the luggage, please!" She called into the house. "Professor Dumbledore! How rude I am! Please, step in, Sir!"

Dumbledore smiled. "No, thank you, Mrs Evans. Your invitation is very kind, but I have a meeting to attend and your family has reason to celebrate. Good bye, Miss Evans! Master Snape." He nodded to Severus, who had just stepped out of the house to help with Lily´s trunk, turned on the spot and disapparated with a faint plop.

"Wow, you´ve grown quite a bit," cried Lily and hugged her friend. "Look how tall you are. I´m barely reaching to your chin!"

"We´re feeding him well!" laughed Mr Evans. "Come here, girl." He hugged his daughter. "Obviously Severus is not the only one, who´s grown. You´re a young lady!"

He took one handle of Lily´s trunk and Severus took the other. Together they carried it up to Lily´s room.

"Is Petunia not at home?" asked Lily.

"No," whispered Mrs Evans. "She has a boyfriend. She leaves after breakfast and comes back after supper."

"A boyfriend? Is he nice?"

Mrs Evans shrugged. "Your father and Severus don´t like him. We weren´t introduced yet, but of course we had a look through the curtains."

"You weren´t introduced? But that´s rude!"

"She´s afraid, he may find out about you and Severus. You know, what I mean."

"About magic, you mean."

Mrs Evans nodded apologetically.

-x-

Mrs Evans prepared Lily´s favorite dishes for lunch. They sat at the dining-room table and Lily had to tell them everything about France. She chatted happily about life at Beauxbatons and everybody had a good laugh at poor professor Fraudeur´s flight from his colleagues. "Just imagine, the poor man´s called Aimé! That´s French for ´beloved´!"

At four in the afternoon Severus got up. "Sorry," he said, "but I have a decoction brewing at the lab. I have to check on it."

"May I come and have a look?"

"Of course, it´s your lab as well as mine. If your parents have no objections, that is."

"No, no, you go, dears," said Mrs Evans. "I´ll unpack Lily´s trunk and start the washing."

"Thank you, mum."

"Be back for supper!"

"OK."

-x-

"Oh, that smells good! What are you decocting?" Lily sniffed.

"I´m trying something with the lavender you sent in your last parcel." Severus led the way to the kitchen, were a cauldron full of violett liquid was bubbling merrily. He stirred it and smiled in a satisfied manner. "This is ready for destiling."

He started to put up the necessary equipment and handed Lily a flask. "You fill this with the decoction."

"Yes, Sir." Lily saluted and started to work.

"How long will this take?" she asked after a while.

"It should be ready next Friday, before we go back to school."

"What will we use it for?"

"Burn oinment. I found the recipe only yesterday. There are not many left, which don´t require a wand." He sighed. "The problem is, it takes ten days to make it. And it requires fresh lavender. If this works, we can replace the fresh flowers and make it during Christmas break."

"So we´re making lavender oil?"

"Not simple lavender oil. I added some nutmeg. This should stabilize the essentials and thus allow us to use this oil instead of the fresh ingredient."

"Nutmeg. This could work."

"I hope so."

"I missed our discussions."

"I missed them, too."

They smiled at each other and continued working.

-x-

The next days passed with more chatting about France at the Evans´ house and checking on the oil at the Snapes´ house. One day they went to the forest to get some bark of birch and oak.

On Friday they went to the lab to finish their work on the lavender-nutmeg oil. The last drops of oil were running through the cooler and they sat down to wait for them to fall into the vial.

Severus showed Lily his work in his mother´s sixth year potions book to bridge over the waiting period. "Your handwriting is a menace," she complained and leaned over to get a closer look. "Who can read this? Tell me, what´s this word, here." Severus leaned closer. The scent of lavender filled the kitchen. Suddenly the handwriting was of no importance. Green eyes met black eyes. When their lips touched, time seemed to stand still.

Severus came back to his senses first. "I´m sorry," he stuttered. "I didn´t mean to..."

Lily was furious. "What do you mean by you didn´t mean it? You can´t kiss me and tell me you didn´t mean it. Next time you do a thing like that, you better be sure about it!"

Severus was taken aback. Desperately he struggled for words. As he couldn´t find any appropriate, he leaned forward and made sure that Lily understood he meant it.

-x-

"This might be a problem, you know." Lily said, when she stoppered the vial with lavender oil.

"Why?"

"If Black or any of his friends finds out that we´re an item, we´re facing hard times."

"So secrecy is crucial."

"I suggest so."

"I agree. I can´t help you in Gryffindor tower. And you´re not as good a dueller as I am."

"Nobody cared to teach me."

"We can use Hogsmeade weekends. I´ll teach you."

"That´s cute of you."

"Cute? I never thought of myself as cute."

"Not? Well, I´ve been told that interesting is a better word for you."

"Who finds me interesting?"

"I won´t tell you. You´re mine alone."

"OK."

-x-

The matter was too important to ignore. Lily and Severus spent Saturday at the lab, packing things away, and discussing their need for secrecy.

"We can´t afford to spill the secret. Black and his idiot friends would be after both of us." Severus pointed out.

"I know. We must be very cautious."

"I know Myra is your best friend, but I think we can´t even risk telling her."

"What she doesn´t know, she can´t tell."

"Exactly."

"I feel bad about that. Myra has been faithful."

"It´s too risky."

"You´re right. But nevertheless, I feel bad."

"Poor girl. We have to be careful that we don´t do anything thoughtless."

"But how can we stop each other from being imprudent without giving the secret away by the action itself?"

"Don´t know."

They dragged a big box with pots and cauldrons to the storeroom.

"Maybe I have an idea," said Severus.

"Tell."

"You can call me a halfblood. It always makes me calm and focused."

"Who´s calling you a halfblood?"

"Nobody."

"You never were a good liar. Who?"

"Some in Slytherin house."

"I never thought of that. Having a muggle father won´t be fun in Slytherin."

"I can handle it."

"And you really want me to call you that?"

"I´d know you don´t care about my blood status and I´d get the warning."

"So, what you´d call me? A mudblood?" Lily looked at the boy searchingly.

"Only if you allow it. And it always would mean this." He kissed her.

"Wow, we´ll be noticed, if you keep walking around insulting me. I shall be egging you on, mister."

"So you agree?"

"Yes. It´s a good idea and it will fool Black´s gang. But I don´t like it too much. We should keep this as an emergency plan."

"Which part of it don´t you like?"

Lily looked scandalized. "Severus Snape! You greedy little squirrel! We don´t have time to kiss all day. Look at those herbs we have to store away!"

The boy sighed. "It was worth a try."

-x-

The evening was spent with packing trunks. Lily had some difficulties to get D´Artagnan into his cage. The owl suspected her of wanting him to take the cage to some distant place and kept trying to escape. At last Severus threw a blanket over the rebellious bird, which earned him a grateful glance from Lily and an encounter with the owl´s beak.

"Bad owl! D´Artagnan is a very bad boy!" scolded Lily and shut the cage. "Come here, poor you!" She offered Severus a jar of salve.

"What´s this noise about?" Mr Evans rushed into the room.

"It´s my owl, dad. First he refused to go into his cage and then he bit Severus." The boy showed his bloody finger.

Mr Evans shot D´Artagnan a severe look. "You better be a good bird." He waged his finger at the owl. "You need help, boy?"

"No, thank you, Sir. Lily was just going to give me some salve." The owl hooted guiltily.

"You´d better go to bed. We have to start early tomorrow. Do you need help with the air-mattress?"

"No, Sir. I´m used to it by now."

"Good night."

"Good night, dad." – "Good night, Sir."

True to his word given some years before, Severus stayed on his air-mattress. He had, however, not given his word not to hold Lily´s hand all night.

-x-

At the breakfast table Lily and Severus tried out their new sign for ´I kiss you.´. It was designed for breakfast: stir your coffee two times clockwise and once counter-clockwise. It worked well. Each of them caught it, when it was given by the other but neither Lily´s parents nor her sister noticed anything.

Lily didn´t enjoy the car ride much as reaching King´s Cross would mean four months of secret keeping and her friend beyond reach. Her mood was rather subdued, when her father finally put her trunk into the Hogwarts express and said good bye. The only comfort was Myra, who was cheerful as ever.

"Look," she beamed and showed a silver bracelet with light blue stones. "After you were gone uncle Aureus had Pierre and his family invited for remember Pierre, don´t you? He apparated with our luggage. Well, Pierre´s father and uncle Aureus have been to school together. They stayed two days and we made a trip to Marseilles and Pierre bought me this."

Lily admired the bracelet.

"He says I´m merveilleuse, Pierre."

"You´re not love-sick, are you?"

"It doesn´t feel like sick. His eyes are coal-black." Myra uttered a happy sigh. "I could have drowned in them. Hey, what are you sighing for? He´s mine."

Lily bit her lip. This was going to be more difficult than she had thought. Luckily Kassandra and Eloise arrived, which caused a change of topic. They had spent their summer together at the antarctic continent as Eloise´s parents felt an urge to study penguins and whether their dung could be used for potions. The two girls kept abusing them for taking them to the cold.

Black and his friends walked past the compartment, but luckily only two seats were empty and they passed. Shortly after the train´s departure Potter came back.

"Hi, Evans!" he said and rumpled up his hair. "You look, eh, great. I was wondering, well, if you´d like to go to Hogsmeade with me?"

"Aren´t you a bit early?" asked Kassandra.

"Just wanted to be sure to be the first to ask." Potter grinned.

"Only to make sure, this is no misunderstanding," said Lily. "You´ve been threatening me for three years, four hadn´t I been abroad, and now you ask me out? You must be mental. I´d not go to Hogsmeade with you, were you the last living being on earth."

"I´ve been protecting you from dark scum."

"Had I ever felt the need for protection I´d have told you. And now get lost, before I´m getting really angry!" hissed Lily.

Potter hesitated, but then left without contradicting.

Lily sighed. Life had just become one touch more complicated.

-x-

The start of term feast brought another surprise. Lily had just chosen a piece of chocolate cake, when a small black-haired girl came and gave small rolls of parchment to her and Myra.

Lily thanked the girl and opened the parchment. It was a message from professor Slughorn, who invited her to an after-feast party in the dungeons.

Myra had an invitation, too.

-x-

"What do you think," asked Myra on their way to the dungeons. "Why were we asked to Slughorn´s party. I mean, I´ve heard about them, but he invites only those, who come from interesting families. None of us can claim to have one."

Lily shrugged. "I have no idea. I say, we have a glass of pumpkin juice and leave as soon as possible."

They had reached Slughorn´s office. Soft music led the way to a near store-hall, were a group of about fifteen students had already assembled. On a table at the wall drinks and small snacks were displayed. The students held glasses, but seeing the fact, that they all had just enjoyed the feast, nobody had touched the food.

Lily knew only few of the assembled students. One of them was Greenspoon. She had a look around and her heart leaped. At the far end of the room stood Severus. She pointed him out to Myra and the two girls set out to meet him, when suddenly Black and Potter stepped into their way.

"Nice to meet you, Evans!" Black grinned. "Bones, here as well?"

"Can I get you drinks?" asked Potter and eyed Lily sheepishly.

Lily scowled at him. "Pumpkin juice," she said. Professor Slughorn had just entered the room. Making a scene in front of him seemed imprudent.

Potter returned with four glasses of pumpkin juice. Black helped him to hand glasses to the girls. There was an awkward silence, during which Potter tried to direct Lily´s attention at his badge. He had become Quidditch captain.

"I didn´t know, you play Quidditch," said Myra as the seconds stretched.

"Started only last year," Potter said in fake modesty.

"Don´t hide your light under a bushel, Prongs," interfered Black. "He´s a superb seeker. Gryffindor owes him winning last years Quidditch Cup and House Cup."

Lily tried to seem interested, but her attempt was more than feeble.

"Ah," Horace Slughorn joined the group. "My young Gryffindor friends! How is your father, Black? I haven´t met him for, what, it must be three years!"

"My father is well, Sir." Black replied politely.

"You give my regards to him, Black! I was so disappointed, when you went into Gryffindor! Well, at least I got your brother." He pointed at a smaller boy, who shared Blacks grey eyes and was just chatting with Severus at the other end of the room.

"Potter! My congratulations for becoming Quidditch captain! Your performance was superb last year. If you decide to be a professional player, I may be able to make contact with some teams for you."

"Thank you, Sir." Potter murmured.

"Bones! Why did you conceal your kinship to Mr Aureus Dupont from me, when I asked you some years ago?"

"I didn´t conceal anything, Sir. You asked me about the Bones, who work for the ministry and I said, truthfully, that I´m not related to them."

"No accusation, Bones, no accusation. I should have worded my question better." He smiled. "Mr Dupont is your..." He looked at Myra questioningly.

"My uncle, Sir. He´s married to my father´s youngest sister."

Slughorn beamed.

Lily was the last of the group to be addressed. "Miss Evans. I understand, you´ve been guest at Mr Dupont´s house as well." Lily nodded. "And I heared from my colleague, Monsieur Fraudeur, whom I happened to meet at Cannes this summer, that you´re an extraordinary potion brewer. According to him, we have more than one here at Hogwarts at the moment." Slughorn winked at Lily. "You excuse me, I have to greet all my guests."

"Thank you for your invitation, Sir," said the four Gryffindors. "Not at all, not at all," beamed Slughorn, "enjoy the party, children." And off he went to greet Greenspoon.

-x-

"That was so creepy!" Myra pointed out on their way to Gryffindor tower. "Having drinks with Black and Potter!" She shuddered.

"Mmh." Lily was absentminded. She had been but meters from Severus and not even been able to talk one word with him. She just hoped, that her timetable was favorable this year.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15: Boys at War

Professor McGonagall handed out the timetables after breakfast the next morning. As it was Sunday, lessons wouldn´t start before the next day.

Lily checked her timetable for lessons with Severus first. It would be Potions and Ancient Runes. It was less than she had hoped for, but at least they would be able to talk during Runes lessons with no other Gryffindors or Slytherins around. Lily sighed.

"Not bad," said Myra, who was sitting beside her. "Look, we have double Potions on Friday afternoon this year. We have all weekend for our homework."

"That´s good," said Lily.

-x-

Lily could hardly wait for Ancient Runes. Time seemed to crawl, but finally it was Wednesday afternoon and they went to professor Stonecarver´s classroom.

The professor welcomed the students warmly, especially Lily and Myra, who had been absent for a year. She gave them a text to translate during the lesson, which she claimed to be rather easy. "We´ll see, how much you have forgotten over the summer," she explained, "and in your case," she nodded at Lily and Myra, "whether you learnt everything you´ll need at Beauxbatons."

They started with their translation, the text was really easy. "Let´s finish this quickly," whispered Lily. "Then we can chat." It took them no more than half of the lesson to complete their assignment.

"What did you tell your French potions professor about me?" asked Severus, as soon as he had written down the last word.

"Why would I tell monsieur Fraudeur anything about you?"

"Because Slughorn hinted to me that his French colleague had congratulated him for my brewing abilities. That was why he invited me to his party."

"I didn´t tell Fraudeur about you."

"You did," Myra interjected. "The perfume."

Severus looked puzzled. Lily giggled. "Ah yes, the rose perfume you sent me. It caused quite an uproar. Everybody wanted it or at least to know, where to get it. I told them, my foster-brother had made it."

"You didn´t tell me about that."

"Sorry, I had more important things on my mind." Lily smiled conspiringly.

Severus looked puzzled again. Then comprehension dawned on his face. "I see," he said.

-x-

Potions on Friday started embarassing. As soon as Lily had taken a seat, Potter put his bag on the chair beside her. "You don´t mind?" he asked, though it was perfectly clear, that he wouldn´t accept rejection.

Lily closed her eyes. Her thoughts raced. What could she do? She couldn´t stand working with Potter a whole year. Of course she minded. This chair was supposed to be Severus´s. On the other hand, Potter would be better than Black. But would he? Seemingly he had a crush on her. A crush, she could not return.

Lily was torn out of her thoughts by professor Slughorn´s voice. "No, no, Potter. No offence, but Miss Evans is out of your league as far as potion brewing is concerned. Snape, you work with Evans. I´ll give you special assignments to challenge you a bit. Potter, you go and work with Bones."

Myra looked unhappy. Potter looked murderous and exchanged glances with Black, who had settled down beside Lupin. "This means trouble, Slytherin," he hissed at Severus, when he passed him to sit with Myra.

Obviously, professor Slughorn had planned to team up Lily and Severus beforehand. After he had given an assignment to the rest of the class, he brought a piece of parchment to them. "I want you to try this," he said.

Lily and Severus had a look at the recipe. It was complicated and well above fifth year level. Slughorn meant to put them through their paces. After a short discussion, they set to work. Severus went to the cupboard for ingredients and Lily set up three cauldrons.

Slughorn went to check on other students potions, but observed Lily and Severus from the corner of his eye. Each movement was accurate. They wasted no time. Severus brought the ingredients in exactly the needed order and amount. Lily added them to the right cauldron at the accurate time. Sometimes she stired two cauldrons at once, and when all three needed stiring at the same time, the boy was there to help her. It was like watching a ballet.

When there were only two minutes left, and all the other students were already packing away their things, Lily and Severus combined the contents of their three cauldrons in a fourth. Curly waves of green smoke left the surface. Lily stired the potion one last time, while Severus reduced the heat. The smoke turned blue. Slughorn raced over to them. "Brilliant!" he cried happily. "I never thought this possible to be finished in less than three hours! Very well done! Take ten points for Gryffindor and ten for Slytherin! Wait, I´ll bring you a bottle. This is of excellent quality, I may as well take it up to the hospital wing."

-x-

Black and Potter didn´t lose time. When Lily witnessed the boys come to the Great Hall for supper two hours later, Severus was limping, as were Potter and Black. Lupin sported a bruise on his wrist and Pettigrew had his wandhand wrapped in what seemed to be a handkerchief.

Potter and Black had a quick bite and left the table soon, Pettigrew in their tow, although he couldn´t have eaten much in the short span of time given that his hand was hurt. Lupin stayed behind to finish his meal.

"See you later," he called after his friends. "See you, Moony." Potter called back.

"Moony?" Lily got up and took her dessert down the table to sit with Lupin. The boy blushed. "Just a nickname," he murmured.

Lily didn´t comment. "What happened?" she asked without further preface.

"Padfoot and Prongs, I mean, Sirius and James, were furious after Potions."

"I got that. What happened?"

"We tried to get the Slytherin in the corridor." Lupin admitted and blushed.

"Not four on one again?" Lily got angry.

"This wasn´t my idea. And four on one seems to be no problem for him anyway. He´s so quick! I swear, I didn´t even see his wand!"

"Why is he hurt, then?"

"He´s not the only one, who´s hurt."

"No pity for the attackers, sorry. It´s your own fault, if you get hurt." Lily took her pudding and went back to Myra.

-x-

"How were you doing that?" asked Lily during their next Runes lesson.

"What do you mean?"

"You were limping badly on Friday evening and when you came to breakfast on Saturday, you didn´t."

"Looked up healing charms some time ago."

-x-

The boys were on war. Lily couldn´t find a different word for it. Severus and the Gryffindor four, who had not only found a stupid nickname for each of them, but refered to themselves as "The marauders" now, sported injuries on a daily basis.

In addition to that, they developed a habit of playing "pranks" to each other, which included hexes, jinxes, encounters with dangerous beasts and accidents with dangerous plants. The Gryffindors had to spend quite some time in detention. Somehow Severus managed to appear innocent most of the time.

-x-

The last Saturday before Halloween was to be the first Hogsmeade weekend. Potter tried to ask Lily out three more times, but she declined. Instead, she asked Myra for help.

"You must go to Hogsmeade with me!" she told her in the dormitory. "I want to meet Severus, but if Potter sees me leave alone, he´ll follow me. If you go with me, he may stay away."

"And what am I supposed to do, while you meet Severus?"

"Isn´t there anybody, whom you can meet an Hogsmeade?"

Myra gave it a thought. "Well," she smiled at last, "maybe there is. Amor! Where is that owl, when you need him?" Amor appeared at the window. "Good bird! Come here!" Myra offered the owl some treats and sat down to write a short note, which she attached to Amor´s leg. "You hurry!" she advised the bird. "I need this delivered by Saturday morning." Amor hooted and took off.

-x-

Saturday was a bright and sunny autumn day. After lunch most of the student body got ready to go into the village. Potter and Black were way behind Lily and Myra in the queue. Every student had to give his or her permission form to Mr Filch.

The two girls hurried away after they had passed the caretaker. If they were lucky, they would be out of sight before Potter and Black came out of the castle.

"Oh, he´s come." Myra suddenly cried happily.

"What?" Lily was confused.

Myra pointed at a darkhaired boy, who was waiting near the gates.

"Is that...?" Lily asked. "He came for your Hogsmeade weekend from France? Wow!"

Myra nodded. "Pierre!" she cried and ran to him. The young man greeted her with a short hug.

"Hello, Pierre!" Lily greeted him friendly. "Lily! Quel plaisir! I mean, what a pleasure!" the young wizard smiled. "Are you coming with us?" His smile was warm, but the concerned look of his eyes gave him away.

"No, don´t be anxious," laughed Lily. "I´ll come only a short way."

They parted at the edge of the village. "We´ll meet at the Three Broomsticks at four." Lily went to the forest.

Severus came ten minutes after her.

"Have you been followed?" asked Lily with concern.

"I don´t think so," the boy replied. "You have brought your wand, I assume?"

"Of course."

-x-

They started with some easy jinxes. After an hour Lily was able to perform a burning jinx and a stinging hex. First she had objections to practice them on Severus, but the boy showed her, how he could heal small injuries with a healing charm.

"These are very useful," Severus explained. "They will give your opponent pain without causing serious injury. You won´t get into too much trouble at school."

"What can I do to avoid getting hit by these?" asked Lily.

Severus showed her a shield charm. Lily mastered it easily. For a while they practiced duelling only using the three spells Lily had learned.

Finally Lily sat by the trunk of an oak, panting. "This is exhausting!" she cried. Her cheeks were red.

"You´re not going to be a pest, I hope." Severus grinned and sat beside her.

"Who´s a pest, mister?" Lily asked with mock sternness in her voice and pushed the boy gently. "You wanted to tell me about that spell you invented. Why don´t you do so, while I recover my breath?"

Severus looked around. "OK, it´s nonverbal. There is no special wand movement required. The incantation is ´levicorpus´."

"What does it do?"

"You studied Latin, didn´t you?"

"You mean...?" Lily grinned. "Show me!" She got up and waited.

"Just a moment. I said ´tell´, not ´use on you´."

"Why not? I practiced those hexes on you!"

"But you are a girl!"

"Meaning what?"

Severus knew, when he had lost. "OK. I´ll show you, but we need a soft subsoil." He got up and looked for some moss. "Engorgio!" The moss swelled to the size of a feather-bed. "Are you ready?"

Lily nodded and the boy pointed his wand at her. Suddenly the world was upside-down. Lily laughed. Her long hair dangled to the ground. "That´s great. Now let me down."

"Watch out. The landing will be rough. Ready?"

"Yes. Ouch!"

"Are you hurt?" Severus hurried over to her.

"I fell on my wrist."

"Poor you! Show me!"

Lily got up and showed the boy her wrist. It started to swell. Severus started a healing chant in a low voice. "Is this better?" he asked after some minutes. The girl nodded.

"We´d better go back." Lily said. "I have to meet Myra."

They went the first part of the way together. "What is the counter-spell?" asked Lily when the first houses came into view.

"Liberacorpus," said Severus. "I see you at Runes."

"You take care."

"So do you."

-x-

When Lily came to the Three Broomsticks, Myra and Pierre were already there. They were chatting happily over two butterbeers. Pierre got up when Lily came to the table and helped her with her chair.

"May I invite you to a butterbeer?" he asked and went to the bar when the girl nodded.

"How was your afternoon?" asked Myra.

"Great! I can do a stinging hex now!" Lily was pleased with the day´s achievement. "And yours?"

"Wonderful! We went to Madam Paddyfoot´s and had coffee." Myra sighed. "He´s so..."

She didn´t tell how Pierre was as he returned with Lily´s drink.

They chatted for about half an hour. Then Pierre saw the girls to the gates and disapparated to France.

-x-

Sunday brought a bad surprise. Lily and Myra crossed the Common room on their way to breakfast, when Lupin rushed to them.

"Please!" he cried and grabbed Lily´s sleeve, "you must come and help!"

Lily tried to free herself from Lupin´s grip, but he won´t let go. "Please!" he urged.

Finally Lily sighed and followed him up to the boys´ dormitory. The sight made the blood freeze in her veins. Pettigrew, still dressed in pyjamas, hung by his heel in midair. He was struggling and shrieking desperately. Potter was watching him with an anxious expression. Black stood beside Pettigrew´s bed, his wand in his hand.

Lily turned on the spot. "I can´t help you with this," she said. Myra entered the room and stood rooted to the spot.

Black was up in an instant. "You tell me how to get him down or I use it on her!" he pointed at Myra.

"Don´t you dare!" Lily hissed and took Myra by her arm to steer her out of the room. Lupin stepped in her way.

"Please!" he said. "We have been trying to get Peter down for nearly half an hour. Look at him!"

"If I were you, I´d not use spells when I don´t know the counter-spell." Lily pointed out. "You go and get McGonagall."

"Levicorpus!" cried Black behind her. Myra shrieked when she was lifted upside-down. Luckily she was wearing jeans.

Lily hit Black with a burning jinx. "You cowardly rat!" she shouted. "You bloody dung-beetle!" The boy rubbed his hand and watched her with a grin.

She tore a feather-bed from the nearest four-poster and positioned it for Myra to fall on. She pointed her wand at her friend and cried "Liberacorpus!".

"Thank you, Evans." Black said behind her. "You can stop it now, Wormtail." Pettigrew stopped shrieking.

Lily helped her friend up. When they left the room, they could hear Lupin and Potter accusing Black of using them.

-x-

"Severus has to know about this," she whispered to Myra on the way downstairs. "Or he´ll be hit by his own spell."

"What can I do?" asked her friend. "And what do you mean by ´his own spell´?"

Lily explained. "You mean to tell me, he made it? Wow!" Myra was impressed.

"He needs to know!" Lily was desperate.

"I´ll tell him," Myra offered. "It´s my fault they know the countercurse now."

"It´s not. If you hadn´t been there, he´d have used the spell on me."

"Do you think, Lupin was in on the plan? He seemed nicer than the rest of them."

"I´m not sure. If Pettigrew can fake shrieking, Lupin and Potter can fake ignorance."

"Filthy scum!" Myra was as furious as Lily. "We´re lucky! Look, who´s coming to breakfast! See you in the hall!" Myra hurried over to Severus, who was just coming from the dungeons and pulled him behind a statue. Lily went on to breakfast.

-x-

Myra came five minutes later, shortly followed by Severus, who sat down and got himself a cup of coffee. Myra sat down beside Lily and helped herself to porridge and tea.

"What are you stiring that coffee for?" she asked after a moment. "You didn´t put anything in it." She glanced over to the Slytherin table, where Severus was stiring his coffee.

"Is this one of your signs?" Myra whispered. "What does it mean."

Lily blushed slightly. "He´s not angry with me. We´re still friends." She lied. "What does he say?" she changed topic quickly.

"He understands, you had to get me down. He thinks, he can make a shield spell against it. He´ll try to finish it before Wednesday."

-x-

The new spell became well known within hours. Between breakfast and lunch more than ten students were found hanging in midair throughout the castle. The teachers had a hard time to get the victims down to the ground. People started moving cautiously and friends were watching each other´s backs. Not one single victim was from Gryffindor house, most were Slytherins.

Slytherin houses started retaliating after lunch. Seemingly somebody had told them the incantation. Suddenly victims came from Gryffindor house as well. Lily and Myra chose to spend the day at Gryffindor tower. They could hardly wait for Wednesday.

-x-

Had the boys been at war before, they were now at a battle of annihilation. The number of contestants had increased, as now Gryffindors and Slytherins were cursing each other in groups. Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw tried to stay out of the conflict, but failed. In their effort to be faster than the enemy the fighting houses often hit innocent passers by.

The Halloween feast on Monday started half an hour late because a considerably big group of Ravenclaw boys were missing and Dumbledore had the castle searched for them. They were found suspended in midair near the library. Seemingly none of them had managed to keep his wand in hand when they were hit.

Dumbledore was angry. His Halloween speech was rather harsh compared to his usual attitude.

On Wednesday morning a fuming Black came to the Great Hall. He was moving rather cautiously like a person suffering from multiple bruises. "Just imagine," he told his friends, who were sitting a short distance down the table from Lily and Myra, "she refused to heal them. Said she was not going to waste her time on minor injuries caused by own stupidity."

Lily leaned closer to Myra. "Remind me to get a Christmas present for the nurse," she whispered.

"Sssssh!" Myra motioned her to be quiet. "You don´t want him to hear you say this these days."

-x-

"I´m so sorry about the counter-spell!" Lily whispered to Severus as soon as he had taken the chair beside her at the Runes classroom.

"Don´t be silly, you couldn´t have left Myra hanging around in the boys´ dormitory." Severus grinned.

Myra was scandalized. "I wasn´t hanging around there!"

Lily giggled. "You were! Don´t forget I saw you!"

"Stop teasing me!" Myra hissed. "This wasn´t funny!" Her grin contradicted her words.

Lily changed topic. "Please tell me you found a way to shield this spell!"

"I think I have," said Severus and started leafing through his dictionary as the professor was watching them. He slipped Lily a piece of parchment. "I had nobody to try it out. I thought maybe you two could do it and tell me at supper, if it worked."

The girls agreed to test the shield charm. They fixed signs for ´It works´ and ´It doesn´t work´.

-x-

Lily and Myra went to their dormitory straight after the lesson. Lily sat on her bed and performed Severus´s shield charm.

"OK," she told Myra. "You try it now."

Her friend pointed her wand at her and said the incantation. Nothing happened.

"Brilliant," Lily was pleased.

"You´re aware that we´re not sure that I can perform Levicorpus at all." Myra pointed out.

Lily gave it a thought. "You try again," she said after lifting the shield.

"Levicorpus!" Myra cried and Lily was lifted into the air.

"You see the shield works," Lily pointed out. "Now let me down, please." She landed on the bed in a heap.

Both girls performed the shield spell and went down to the Great Hall to signal Severus that he had been successful. For the first time in days they didn´t watch out for other students nervously.

-x-

As the nurse maintained her refusal to heal bruises got from the new fashion spell, the castle soon resembled a hospital. Everywhere boys were seen limping or sporting sprained wrists. Girls were barely afflicted as it was understood to be unsportsmanlike to suspend a girl in midair. This attitude was encouraged by the fit, which professor McGonagall got after she found Morgana Hopkins from Slytherin house, who was not wearing jeans under her robes, near the hospital wing.

When the student body finally assembled for the Christmas feast, Dumbledore was not angry but furious.

"This will end here and now," he fumed. "Many of you have been missing lessons due to injury. The use of Levicorpus on a fellow student will no longer be tolerated. Who breaks the rule will have to face severe punishment. I hope I have made myself clear. Now tuck in."

-x-

Mrs and Mr Evans were glad to have the children back home for Christmas. "We missed you so much last year, dear," Mrs Evans said to Lily while they prepared a welcome home dinner. Severus and Mr Evans played chess in the living room. Petunia was still out.

"I missed you, too," Lily replied, "although the Dupont family outdid themselves to give us a beautiful Christmas." They chatted about French Christmas customs for a while.

"Ah, that must be Petunia, at last," Mrs Evans stated when she heared the front door.

Indeed, Lily´s sister entered the kitchen one minute later. "So you´re back," she nagged. "Don´t they keep students at this school over Christmas?"

"Petunia, you´re being rude again!" Mrs Evans cried. "We talked about being rude to your sister."

"Leave it, mum," said Lily, "you know, Petunia, I´ve never done anything to you. I´m not walking around cursing you." Petunia shrieked. "But I may one day, if you don´t stop being so nasty. A friendly greeting is not asked too much."

"She´s threatening me again, mum!"

"She´s not. She asks you to be polite."

"Why are you always siding with her?"

"I´m not. I´m tired that my daughters can´t be in a room for five minutes without a scene. Pull yourself together, girl."

-x-

Dinner was not too pleasant. The meal was delicious, but Petunia looked murderous. Although she spoke no single word, the atmosphere was tense. When Severus announced, he´d go to his house, Lily got up and asked her parents´ permission to go for a walk. It was granted without hesitation.

They went to the Snape house in silence. When they reached it, Severus unlocked the door and let Lily pass him. She fell on his neck as soon as he had closed the door and started sobbing uncontrolledly. Severus put his arms around her and stroked her hair.

After a while, when Lily had calmed down a bit, they went to the living room and sat on the sofa. Severus put his arm around Lily´s shoulder and she rested her head against him.

They sat in silence for nearly half an hour. At last Lily wiped her face and got up. "I´d better go back," she whispered.

Severus nodded. "I´ll see you to the door."

Before he opened the front door for Lily, they kissed. Then the girl slipped out of the house and returned to her family´s home.

-x-

They went for a long walk in the forest the next afternoon. Lily had a small bag of plastic jars with her. They chatted happily all the way and kept an eye open for potion ingredient, though there were few to be found in the snow. They collected some mistletoe and frozen hips.

"You know," Lily said as she put the jar of hips back into her bag, "I thought we would be kissing more, once we´re back home."

Severus looked uncertain. "We can kiss, if you want to," he offered.

Lily laughed. "No, it´s OK, I mean, don´t misunderstand me. I like kissing you. I´m only surprised that talking is more important for both of us."

"We couldn´t talk openly for nearly four months. No wonder we have much to say."

"We really have to find a way to talk. These past months were horrible. I don´t think I can stand this much longer."

"I can´t see how to solve that problem."

"I may have an idea. It came to me only yesterday when I was walking home."

"What is it?"

"I won´t tell you. That way you won´t be disappointed, if it doesn´t work."

"You know, neglecting kissing could be a mistake."

Lily giggled. "We don´t want to make a mistake, do we?"

-x-

When they approached the town in the late afternoon, Severus looked at Lily earnestly. "You get that grin off your face, girl," he advised. "Or your father will kill us both."

"He´d go after you first, this would buy me time to escape." Lily laughed.

"You want me killed by your revengeful father?"

"No, dear. I don´t. I´ll try to look less happy."

"Don't exaggerate, or he'll go after me for mistreating you."

They giggled.

-x-

They spent most of the time at the Snape house. Lily's parents had no objections that the two magical people stayed out of Petunia's way.

"I knew knowing how to chop wood would come in handy one day," Severus pointed out as he cleaved a large chunk.

Lily watched him from a seat beside the empty chicken-coop.

"You know," she said, "I've been wondering, how they managed to find and listen in on us back in October. And I've been trying to remember, what we talked about besides the spell."

"Had they guessed we were more than friends, we´d know by now." Severus reassured her.

"We can bet on that." Lily sighed. "Can you imagine, Potter asked me out! Several times!"

"Maybe we could use that," Severus said pensively. "You could try to sound him out."

Lily was scandalized. "You can´t be serious. You don´t want me to go out with that idiot! I never would!"

Severus put the ax aside and went over to Lily. "Sorry," he said and kissed her cheek, "I didn´t mean to upset you. I just thought..."

"You thought what?" Lily frowned. "You thought you´d use me as a spy? You´d send me to your enemy to investigate? And while I´m there, I can allow him to kiss me. It may make him chatty!" Lily fumed.

"I didn´t think at all, it seems. No, you can´t go out with Potter."

Lily calmed down and Severus resumed chopping.

-x-

"You know," Lily said the next day, "maybe you were right yesterday. Sounding out Potter could be prudent."

Severus didn´t agree. "I hadn´t thought it out. It´s far too dangerous. I don´t want you to go out with him."

"You suggested it yourself only yesterday. What changed your mind?"

"Your suggestion he might try to kiss you."

"I can handle that. And I don´t think I have to go out with him. Perhaps a short walk to the lake or a chat at the Common room would do."

"I don´t like that."

"I´ll be cautious."

"You better be."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Means of communication

Dumbledore´s harsh Christmas speech seemed to have done the trick. Levicorpus wasn´t used any more in the corridors and things were back to normal at Hogwarts. Which meant that war was no longer waged between Gryffindor and Slytherin, but Severus and the marauders. Lily was relieved. She knew her friend could handle the Gryffindor four when they lacked the element of surprise.

The second Runes lesson brought a pleasant surprise. Severus waved his wand and murmured a spell. "Done," he said cheerfully without trying to be low-voiced. To Lily´s surprise, neither the professor nor the Ravenclaw students reacted.

"I invented another spell," Severus explained with a pleased expression. "The incantation is ´Muffliato´. It prevents people from listening in on you."

"That´s great!" Lily beamed.

"Is there a special wand movement?" asked Myra.

Severus showed them. Professor Stonecarver scowled at him. The spell didn´t prevent people from watching you.

They started translating their text, chatting happily between searching for words and looking up grammar.

Lily was relieved and happy. Nobody would be able to listen in on them with this spell. They could talk about what they wanted. They could even say ´I love you´ to each other in the middle of a crowd, as long as they found a reason to be seen standing side by side. And never again would anyone steal one of Severus´s spells.

-x-

Lily went to the library the same evening. As Severus had found a way to allow them a chat so quickly, she wanted to follow the idea she had had during the break equally fast. After looking up some spells she went up to her dormitory to experiment.

She had to try thrice but then she succeeded. With a happy smile she started composing a note to Severus. When she had finished it, she wrapped one of the two small mirrors she had been working on in the note.

-x-

Lily had to wait for Friday to give the mirror to her friend. Professor Slughorn had another special assignment for them, a salve needed for the hospital wing. The girl had been asking herself for weeks, how she and Severus were supposed to learn fifth year potions, when Slughorn made them brew supplies for the nurse every Friday. Luckily Myra borrowed them her notes willingly.

Severus performed the Muffliato spell as soon as work was in progress. "How was your week?" he asked while he measured the right amount of sheep´s fat.

"Good," Lily answered and pretended to concentrate on chopping cocoa beans. "You remember the idea I mentioned at your house? It worked. You get something out of your bag later and leave it open so I can put something in it for you without beings seen rummaging in your things."

Severus nodded and continued by adding some cinnamon to the cauldron. When the end of the lesson was approaching, he put his bag on his chair and started to cram his book and quills into it. He left it open when he went to the store cupboard to get another shrivelfig.

Lily seized the opportunity to slip her parcel into the bag while she was pretending to pack her own book away.

-x-

In the evening Lily closed the hangings of her four-poster and cast a Muffliato. She lit her wand, took her own mirror and waited. After five minutes Severus´s dark eyes were looking at her from the mirror.

"Did you cast a Muffliato?" Lily whispered.

"Yes," the boy replied. "This is awesome. How did you make them?"

"The images are exchanged due to a slightly changed Protean charm, the sound is exchanged in a similar way."

"That´s sly."

"Thank you."

They chatted for nearly an hour. Not that they had to tell much after having spent a double Potions lesson together, but they enjoyed the fact that they could talk freely.

-x-

The next Hogsmeade weekend was to be in February. Lily was not surprised when Potter came to ask her out as soon as the note was put up in the Common room.

"I can´t," she told Potter with an excusing smile. "I promised Myra to go with her. But why don´t we have a little stroll to the lake before lunch?" She looked at the boy questioningly.

Potter agreed. "If I can´t get a date," he said, "I´ll be content with a morning walk for the moment being. Next time I ask you out, you won´t be able to resist me." He grinned.

"Are you mental?" Myra whispered to Lily as soon as Potter had rejoined his friends. "What for are you going to the lake with that toad?"

Lily cast a Muffliato. "To throw the toad back into the water?" she suggested with a wicked smile. "Honestly, I want to find out how he listened in on Severus and me back in October."

"This makes sense in some weird way. You be careful. Don´t trust Potter."

"I won´t. By the way, I told him we were going to Hogsmeade together. Is that OK with you?"

"If you don´t mind meeting Pierre again. He wrote and asked for our next Hogsmeade weekend last week. I just sent Amor to him."

"Meeting Pierre again? He´s nice. And don´t be anxious, I won´t go with you all afternoon. Severus and I have arranged a meeting."

"We can meet at the Three Broomsticks and go back together. It worked well last time."

"It didn´t work at all as they knew where I had been before. But we can meet there nevertheless."

-x-

When Lily told Severus about her plan to go for a walk with Potter, the boy looked concerned. "You take care," he said. "Potter is a rat. Do you want me to be nearby in case you need help?"

"No, really, I can handle this. We don´t want a battle when he sees you. I won´t get any information from him while you´re around."

"Probably you´re right. I don´t like this."

"As if I was enjoying it. It has to be done."

Severus sighed. "You take care."

-x-

The Hogsmeade weekend started sunny, but icy cold. "Poor you," Myra pointed out at breakfast in a whisper. "A walk in this cold won´t be fun. Nor will be meeting someone in the forest."

Lily went to her dormitory for her coat, cap, scarf and gloves. Potter met her in the Common room, where he had been chatting with his friends while waiting for the girl.

When they left through the portrait hole together, Potter´s friends cheered behind them and Black cried some words of encouragement after Potter. Lily was angry. She forced herself to remain friendly and adressed the boy with false sweetness.

"I´m not a piece of prey. You might want to point that out to your friends."

Potter blushed. "I´m sorry. Sometimes they´re distressing. You're not angry with me about their behaviour, I hope."

They walked down the stairs and Potter walked half a step in front of her like she had learned at Beauxbatons a real gentleman would do. What did Potter know about being a gentleman? When they reached the Entrance Hall, the boy offered his arm to Lily to hold on. The girl took it reluctantly.

Potter led the way to the lake. Lily waited for him to start conversation for she feared that if she did, she might shout the only question she was interested in at the boy. That would be quite a give-away.

Potter, however, remained silent all the way to the lake. "We could have brought skates," he pointed out when they reached the shore, where a crowd of students was having fun on the frozen surface of the lake.

"I can´t skate," Lily replied.

"I´d love to teach you," Potter smiled.

"Really." A small smile.

"Yes, honestly. I´m a good skater. I tought Sirius last Christmas break." The mention of Sirius Black turned out to be a mistake. Lily´s expression darkened.

"Look," said Potter, "I swear I wasn´t in on the nasty trick he played to you and your friend at Halloween."

"You didn´t help either."

"How could I. I didn´t know how to get your friend down from the air."

"You could have stepped in when he was threatening me. But then, you never did."

"I didn´t think he´d use that spell on a girl." Potter looked guilty.

"Oh, come on. He´s taking on four on one. He´s been threatening me for years, as have you, by the way. And you thought, he´d not use that spell on me?" Lily was fuming now. "How stupid can you be?" She turned away from Potter and looked up to the castle. Was that Severus in the distance?

Potter tried to calm his company down. "I never meaned to threaten you. I swear."

Lily turned round and stepped past Potter to the lake. That was all she needed now, Potter spotting Severus in the distance. "So what was your plan then?"

Potter was taken aback. "I meant to protect you."

"Protect me from what?"

"Protect you from whom. Snivellus."

"Who?"

"Snape. He´s up to his nose in dark stuff and he made you cry."

"Nonsense, he never made me cry. Lupin has mentioned this fairy-tale to me. I thought, you and Black invented it to make him help you."

"We caught him. You had just left." Potter was as confused as Lily.

"When was that supposed to be?"

"In our first year. In winter."

Comprehension dawned to Lily. "You idiots!"

"What? You´re a bit ungrateful!"

"You idiots started a war, because my gran had died and Severus tried to comfort me for half an hour. I could hit you!"

"Why didn´t you tell? Why didn´t he tell?"

"Did you ask? And you may forgive me, but I had other things on my mind at that time."

"Sorry."

"Anyway. Did I seem in danger, when you spied on me at the forest back in October?"

"He tried to curse you."

Lily laughed. "How stupid can you be? He was teaching me to duel. Can´t you tell an attack from a training?"

Potter blushed. "But he was using the spell on you. He had used it on Sirius before."

"He took his time doing so, didn´t he? Looking for moss to fall on. Oh, yes, he´s really dangerous, Severus, he is."

Potter didn´t know what to say. Lily thought she might as well push him further. "As we´re sorting things out right now... how did you manage to follow me and listen in? I didn´t see you."

Potter bit his lip. Lily smiled at him encouragingly and threw back her long red hair. "An invisibility cloak," the boy said at last. "Got one for Christmas last year."

"Wow! An invisibility cloak! You have to tell me more about that." Lily walked along the lakeshore and Potter followed. They chatted about the cloak for a while.

Fun was over when the boy tried to hold Lily´s hand. "You´re being a bit quick," the girl said coldly. "I regarded you a toad this morning. I´m ready to acknowledge that there have been some misunderstandings. But nothing that´s been said gives you the right to hold my hand. Hell is gonna freeze sooner."

She turned on her heel and stomped back to the castle, where she went straight to the library.

-x-

In the afternoon Lily and Severus met at a different spot of the forest than last time. Severus was already there when the girl arrived. Lily cast a Muffliato as soon as she set foot on the clearing.

"An invisibility cloak!" she explained. "Potter has one."

Severus was more concerned about Lily than about cloaks. "Are you OK? He didn´t try anything?"

Lily appeased her boyfriend. "I´m OK. Nothing happened to me. Look!" She turned on the spot. "I´m as good as new."

Severus sighed. "I love it, when your hair is flying like a veil."

"Don´t change topic, dear. We were discussing invisibility cloaks. I was at the library and I found a charm. I know how to look through that bloody cloak."

Lily tried to teach Severus the charm, but he had difficulties with it. "You´re better at Charms than I am," he lamented. "This may be too advanced for me."

"Then I´ll be your eyes," Lily smiled. "I see them!" she cried. And really, Potter and Black were approaching crouched under Potter´s cloak. Black was holding and looking at a piece of parchment. He stuffed the parchment into his pocket when Potter pointed at Lily and Severus.

"They are over there, beside the oak. Don´t look at them," Lily suggested. "It might be an advantage, if they´re not aware I see them. Black was holding a parchment. I had the impression, it was leading them here. I wonder what it is."

"We have no possibility to find out now. What are we going to do?"

"Nothing. You teach me another spell for duelling. We have to wait for a good opportunity to get them."

-x-

It was like enacting a play for Black and Potter. Severus chose a spell to floor an opponent for the lesson. "You try to do it nonverbally," he advised. "It gives you an advantage in a fight."

Lily mastered the spell quickly and to her surprise nonverbal spell-casting came to her easily as well.

"I´m not surprised," said Severus when she pointed this out to him. "You´re easily the best at Charms in our year. I never thought you´d have difficulties with nonverbals."

They practiced the spell a little longer as it gave them an opportunity to hold each other´s hands when helping to get up. Finally Severus suggested a training battle to repeat everything Lily had learned so far.

They had fun aiming jinxes at each other, dodging the spells or shielding them.

"You have to aim more carefully!" cried Severus when Lily missed him with a stinging hex.

"I was aiming perfectly!" Lily answered and dodged the boy´s jinx. "I hit Black!"

"You´re a sly lady, my dear!" Severus answered and cast a shield charm to repulse Lily´s next attack.

After some more minutes they announced a truce. They sat side by side on a rock and chatted a while. Lily described Black´s stiffled howl of pain when he was hit by her hex in detail and they had a good laugh. Too soon they had to go back. Again Lily went to meet Myra and Pierre and Severus set out for the castle.

-x-

"You won´t believe it," Myra giggled when they walked up the hill from the gates. "Pierre delivered a message from Angelique. Monsieur Fraudeur finally married Madame Baguette-Magique!"

"Did he? I never thought he would! How did she get him to do that?"

"I´ve no idea. Probably she was around when he sampled love potions." The girls giggled.

"Look, who´s coming home!" Sirius Black and James Potter appeared out of thin air beside them. "I´d never thought you´d have the face to date Snivellus after you found out we can follow you unseen." Black sneered. "What spell did you use to be unheared?"

Lily was furious. "Who gives you the right to follow me? I thought I made it clear I don´t need your protection!" she addressed Potter.

"You made it clear you think I´m a toad."

"And you wasted no time proving it!"

"I don´t want to disturb the exchange of niceties," Black interfered, "but I don´t have all day. The spell, Evans."

"I´d rather eat my tongue than tell you."

"I can arrange that." Black drew his wand.

Before Lily could draw hers, Potter forced his friend to lower his wand. "Leave it, padfoot," he said gently. "We don´t need the spell. I´m no toad, Evans." He held Black´s arm and motioned the girls to continue to the castle with a theatratical gesture.

-x-

"He stepped between Black and me," Lily told Severus via mirror in the evening. "I was kind of relieved," she admitted.

"Perhaps there´s a trace of decency in him," Severus admitted. "I don´t like him nevertheless. He´s after my girlfriend."

Lily giggled happily. "Let him be. I´m yours," she reassured Severus.

They started making plans concerning Potter´s invisibility cloak and the enigmatic piece of parchment. They needed a plan for neither of them was going to stand Black and his friends slink after them for two more years.

-x-

The school year was nearing it´s end, when an unexpected opportunity arose. Lily was on her way to Gryffindor Tower in the evening. She had used her anti-invisibility charm as most students had already returned to their houses and she had no desire to be surprised by Black and/or Potter in an empty corridor.

Lily was near the hospital wing, when she heard a deafening clatter. Seconds later Argus Filch, the caretaker raced past her. "One day I´ll get this poltergeist," she heard him pant. Curious, Lily followed him. She sped up when she heard Filch´s cry of triumph.

The girl was shocked at the sight, when she peeked around the corner. The clatter had been from a suit of armor. Its parts were scattered over the corridor. Filch seemed to have caught the culprit, Severus. What the caretaker didn´t see, were Black and Potter under their cloak. Black had still his wand in hand and both were stiffling laughter.

Lily´s thoughts raced. What could she do to help her friend? Suddendly a wicked smile appeared on her face. She drew her wand, aimed carefully, swished and flicked and levitated the invisibility cloak just high enough for Black and Potter´s feet to be seen.

Filch was there in an instant. With a broad grin he pulled the cloak from the two boys. "You two, again!" he cried. "We´re going straight to the headmaster. This suit of armor is valuable. Come, come! All three of you!" He took Potter´s cloak and the enigmatic piece of parchment he had been holding and led the way.

The two Gryffindors followed with hanging heads. Severus made up the rear. He was confident that Dumbledore would find out the truth about who knocked down the suit of armor.

-x-

"It was a map," Severus explained later in the evening. "I saw it on the staircase. I´m not sure, but I think it showed people, too. There were moving dots in it. Black tapped it with his wand and it went blank only seconds before we entered Dumbledore´s office. Filch was distracted."

"Dumbledore didn´t think you had anything to do with the suit of armor?"

"No, he looked into Potter´s eyes and sent me away."

"So you don´t know whether they got the cloak and map back?"

"I waited for them. I understand that Filch has the map, so it´s probably lost. Dumbledore has the cloak and intends to hand it only to Potter´s parents. So they won´t have it for a while and if we´re lucky, Potter won´t be allowed to take it to school in the future."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17: A Nightmare

Lily would have liked to take advantage of the fact that Potter´s cloak was at Dumbledore´s office, but they couldn´t. Fifth year was OWL year and they had to study hard. So she spent most of her time in the library or the Common room, revising and looking up things. Communication with Severus was restricted to Runes, Potions and their mirror chats in the evening. Lily was not dissatisfied. It had been far worse in the past.

Finally, near the end of June a group of very old witches and wizards arrived at the castle. There was a welcome dinner for them and the headmaster introduced them to the students. They were the ministry examiners.

Lily was nervous. She had worked hard and revised for several weeks, but had she worked hard enough to stand before these old and wise people?

Luckily it was Charms first. This was her best subject and she was confident that she wouldn´t fail at this.

-x-

The written examination took place in the Great Hall in the morning. The house tables had been replaced by small desks. The OWL students were to sit on the left side of the hall, the NEWT candidates on the right. Professor McGonagall and a very old wizard, probably the oldest Lily had ever seen, were proctoring.

The exam papers were already lying on the desks when the students sat down. McGonagall gave a short speech, pointing out that anti-cheating measures had been taken and wishing them good luck for the test. With a flick of her wand she turned the papers.

Lily read the first question and smiled. This was not too difficult. She started writing.

After a quick lunch (Dumbledore himself made the desks disappear and the house tables reappear with a casual wand movement.) the practical part of the examination was to take place. The OWL students were first. (The NEWT students were seen rushing to the library for some last minute study.) As they were called in alphabetical order, Lily didn´t have to wait long. Shortly after Black (thumbs-up to his friends) and Myra (small smile to Lily and the other Gryffindor girls) had left the Hall, she was called.

She was to be examined by the old wizard, who had proctored in the morning. He gave her an encouraging smile and asked her to make a cup, which was standing in front of him, tapdance.

Lily waved her wand at the cup. It grew legs and arms. A second flick of Lily´s wand and the saucer turned into a hat and the spoon into a stick. The cup picked hat and stick up and started to dance. The examiner watched in amazement.

"This was the most brilliant cup dance I ever saw, Miss Evans!" he cried when the cup took off its hat and bowed. "And you did that nonverbally, too! I understand your transfiguration skills match your charm skills." He pointed at the hat. "I barely dare to ask this simple task of you, but it´s part of the exam. Would you please levitate the cup to the other table and then summon it back, Miss Evans?"

Lily did as she was asked. "Very good, very good, indeed," the examiner murmured and took notes. "Thank you, Miss Evans, that was all."

-x-

[Most of the following scene is not my work, but J.´s]

Having had a good start, helped a lot. It gave Lily selfconfidence and she did well in all her subjects.

The last but one exam was Defence Against the Dark Arts. It was Lily´s least favorite subject. Not that she was bad at it, but she had to learn lots of things out of books without any first hand experience. It was difficult and boring.

After the exam she went to the lake with Myra and the girls. They compared their answers and Lily was satisfied that she seemed to have gotten some things right where she had been guessing.

It was a sunny day and the lawn was filled with students, who enjoyed the free afternoon. Many had taken their transfiguration notes with them, for this would be their last exam the next day. Others, like Potter, had taken toys to the shore.

The girls were just giggling at Eloise´s answer to question nine when Myra suddenly drew in her breath. Lily looked where she was looking and froze. Severus was lying on the lawn and Potter and Black were moving in on him. Suddenly pink bubbles streamed from her friend´s mouth. They finally got him. Without thinking Lily was up and ran over to the boys.

"Leave him ALONE!" she cried.

Potter turned and looked at her. "All right, Evans?" he purred and rumpled his hair. It was ridiculous. Did that scum really flirt with her while he was manhandling Severus?

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated. "What´s he done to you?"

Potter gave a loutish answer.

Lily was furious. "You think you´re funny, but you´re just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone."

Potter pushed it. "You go out with me, and I´ll never touch him again."

"I´d rather go out with the giant squid."

"Bad luck, Prongs," Black said briskly.

Suddenly a gash appeared on Potter´s face. Severus had his wand back. Lily was relieved, but it lasted for only a moment. Potter turned and cursed him. Severus was drawn upside down into midair. His robes had fallen over his head to show his legs and underpants.

The onwatchers cheered.

"Let him down!"

"Certainly," Potter replied and Severus fell to the ground. It was not over, though. As soon as the boy had gotten up, Black cast a Petrificus totalus on him.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Lily shouted. She drew her own wand. No boy in his right mind would duel a girl in public. If he lost, he´d be ridiculed. If he won, there was no glory in cursing a girl.

"Evans, don´t make me hex you," Potter said.

"Take the curse off him, then!"

"There you go," Potter sneered. "You´re lucky Evans was here, Snivellus..."

"I don´t need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"

Lily blinked. The emergency break. They had to keep their secret. Don´t let Potter tell about their friendship. She had to play along.

"Fine," she said as coolly as she could. "I won´t bother in future. And I´d wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus."

"Apologise to Evans!" Potter roared at Severus. What a weasel! First he forced Severus to pull the emergency break and then he tried to derive advantage from it.

"I don´t want you to make him apologise," Lily shouted at Potter. "You´re as bad as he is." You´re worse, so much worse. You´re not in his league at all.

"What? I´d never call you a – you know what." You´d never get my permission to.

"Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you´ve just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can – I´m surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK!" Lily turned on her heel and hurried up to the castle. Her thoughts raced. A teacher. She needed a teacher.

-x-

"Ouch! You watch out where you are goin´!" She had bumped into the gameskeeper. Hagrid. An adult. He would help.

"Hagrid! Down by the lake!" Lily panted. "You got to help!"

The gigantic man craned his neck. "What´s that assembly about?" He didn´t wait for an answer but started to the lakeshore at a run.

Lily tried to recover her breath. Seconds later she heard Hagrid´s angry cry. "Wands down! All of you!"

Severus was safe.

-x-

Lily went up to her dormitory. She was so upset. How could this happen? Poor Severus! Humiliated in front of the whole school. And she had made things worse by interfering. Lily sobbed.

Someone hugged her and stroked her hair. It was Myra. "Ssshh," she whispered. "I´m here. It´s over. You couldn´t know he was such a rat!"

"You´re right, he´s a rat!"

"He will pay. I promiss!"

"He surely will. Slimy little toad, he is!"

"He always seemed so nice!"

Lily wiped her tears and looked at Myra questioningly. "Myra, what are you talking about?"

"Severus, he always seemed to be so nice! What are you talking about?"

"Potter! Oh, Myra, I hate him! He´s the worst weasel I ever met!"

"You´re not talking about Severus? He called you a..."

Lily laughed. It was a short and bitter laugh. "Mudblood. You can say the word. It doesn´t hurt, if it´s not intended to."

"You´re not going to forgive him!"

"There´s nothing to forgive. He had my permission."

"You´re giving people permission to insult you?" Myra was bewildered.

"Only Severus. We agreed to keep our friendship secret at all cost. Calling me a mudblood was supposed to stop me from spilling the beans. I´d have called him a halfblood had it been the other way round."

"Aren´t you being a bit drastical?"

"No. Did you see what happened after I left? Is he OK?"

Myra shook her head. "I went right after you. I think, Potter used another levicorpus on him, but I´m not sure. Do you want me to find Eloise? She stayed behind."

"No, I´d have to tell her about Severus."

-x-

Lily could hardly wait for the evening. Her transfiguration book lay forgotten on her bedside table. Myra brought her some food from the Great Hall as Lily couldn´t struggle to her feet to go there herself.

"Rumor has it Potter is going to be expelled. His parents are at the headmaster´s office." Myra put a plate of sandwiches on the bedside table.

"Any news about Severus?"

"No, sorry. But he´s not at the headmaster´s office, so he´s not in trouble. By the way, Black isn´t either. He´s in the common room, sitting in a corner with Lupin and Pettigrew, chewing his fingernails. He´s scared they´ll expell his best friend."

"I never thought he was capable of caring for anybody."

"You eat now." Myra said motherly. "I brought you roastbeef. I know you like that."

Lily took a bite. She had no appetite, but didn´t want to refuse Myra´s caring offer. She ate two sandwiches and had some pumpkin juice before claiming to sleep early and closing the hangings of her four-poster.

At the apointed time Lily cast her muffliato, lit her wand and consulted her mirror. "Are you alright, love?"

There was no answer. Was he injured too badly to answer?

"Severus?" Lily whispered pleadingly. "Answer me!"

"Hear who´s talking!" answered a cold voice. The eyes that were staring at her were not warm and black, but cold and grey. "Meet me in the common room, Evans. Now!"

Lily closed her eyes. This was not to be true. She got up and put her robes over her night-dress. Cautiously she slipped out of the dormitory and went downstairs.

Black was sitting in an armchair by the fire. A cruel smile played round his mouth. "Come here!" he ordered and pointed at the armchair beside his.

Lily sat down. Black eyed her calculatingly. Lily tried to return his gaze coolly.

"So," Black finally spoke up. "Here I sit, pondering how I could pay you back for getting James into trouble, and look, you fall into my hand like a ripe apple." He grinned.

"Potter got himself into trouble."

"Don´t distract from the heart of the matter. Speaking of hearts... Did I just hear you call old Snivelly ´love´?"

Lily bit her lip. You could say much about Black, but not that he was slow in the uptake.

"So all the way we thought you were fraternizing with the enemy when you were snogging him," Black continued. "What to do with this crucial piece of information?" He said in mock contemplation.

Lily waited. Let him tell what he wants. Offer nothing.

"You are aware what will happen, if I decide to make your little secret public?" Black asked.

Lily eyed him calmly.

"Answer me, Evans. Are you aware?"

"I have an idea."

Black grinned. "Snogging that freak." He shuddered. "We´ll all have a good laugh about your taste."

Lily smiled. Let him tell them. There´s no indecency in love. They may laugh, but they´ll stop after some time.

"Slytherin house won´t laugh, though," Black continued. "My brother tells me old Snivelly is having a hard time there for being a halfblood. My, my, and now a known mudblood-snogger."

Lily´s heart went cold. Severus would be in serious trouble. "What do you want?"

"Your mirror for a start. These could be fun. Where did you get them from?"

Don´t give away you made them. Think, Lily, think. "A present from my French host family." He can´t check on that.

Black stretched his arm. "Your mirror."

Lily produced it from her robes. She had almost put it in Black´s hand when she drew it back. "How did you get the other?"

"Concerned about old Snivelly?" Black grinned.

Lily stood his gaze. "How did you get it?"

"Well, it was funny. James lifted Snivelly up into the air and was just threatening to remove his pants..."

Lily gasped. "He didn´t?" she asked anxiously.

Black enjoyed her fear for a moment. "No," he said just when Lily thought she wouldn´t be able to hold back her tears any longer. "Snivellus lost this." He giggled. "It was funny. Imagine the ugliest person in Hogwarts running around with a mirror in his pocket. James presented me with it. Thought I´d have more use for it. And, alas, I have."

Lily sighed of relief.

"Speaking of James," Black continued. "You pray he´s not expelled. And now give me that mirror."

Lily hesitated. "If I give you the mirror, you keep the secret," she said.

"What do you think you´re doing?"

"Negotiating."

"You are not in a position to negotiate. I´m making conditions," sneered Black.

"You forget you might get nothing, if you push it too far."

Black frowned.

Lily smiled. "We´d better negotiate."

"What do you offer?"

"What do you want?"

"The mirror. You go out with James. You stay away from Snivellus." Black ticked them off on his fingers.

"What do you offer?"

"I keep your secret."

"You can´t have three things for one."

"Can´t I?"

"You can´t. You choose one or I´ll decide to face publicity." Lily gazed at Black.

Black stared at her. "And give Snivellus to the wolves?"

"He can handle you, he can handle Slytherin house."

"You´re bluffing."

"Try me."

Black considered his options. "The mirror," he finally said. "And you go out with James. I can control Snivellus myself."

"I will not go out with Potter. No way."

"The mirror then."

"OK. To avoid misunderstandings: I give you the mirror. You keep my secret. You don´t tell one living soul, not even your friends. No further demands. I give you the mirror. That´s it."

Black nodded.

"We have a deal. Make your promise."

"What?"

"I want you to say it."

"I promise to keep your secret in exchange for the mirror."

"You will not even tell your friends."

"I will not even tell my friends."

They shook hands and Lily handed Black the mirror.

-x-

Potter was not expelled. The Gryffindor four went to breakfast together the next day. It must have been a narrow escape, for Potter was unusually subdued.

Severus came to breakfast late. Some students giggled when he entered the hall.

Lily stired her coffee and the boy did alike.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18: Vernon

The last exam – Transfiguration – went well. The written examination was not too difficult but Lily got some answers wrong because she hadn´t revised the last evening. The practical part was easy. Lily was examined by the wizard, who had already tested her in Charms.

"Miss Evans, what a pleasant surprise!" he beamed at her. "Would you kindly transfigure this bird," he pointed at a crow, which was sitting on a perch beside his desk, "into a vase?"

Lily aimed at the perch first. With a flick of her wand she made it a small table. Then she transfigured the crow in a beautiful crystal vase.

"Excellent!" the examiner cried. "You´re the first to make sure the vase didn´t break. And now, if you please, back to a bird."

Lily obliged.

-x-

Never before had Lily been as relieved to get aboard the Hogwarts express. In some hours she would be reentering the muggle world, where life was much easier. Where she could talk to Severus whenever and wherever she wanted. She was looking forward to weeks of light-heartedness and fun, without worrying about secrecy. Well, she could not tell her parents that her feelings for the boy were far from sisterly, but that didn´t count.

The Gryffindor fifth year girls had got themselves a compartment and were discussing summer plans happily. Eloise and Kassandra were going to Nepal. Eloise´s parents had heard about a Nepalesan herbologist, who experimented with gravity. "At least, it will not be as cold as last summer," Eloise laughed.

The train was already near London when Potter came. He looked ill at ease. "May I have a private word with you, Evans?" he asked.

Lily was about to refuse, but agreed at last. What if Black had broken his word and told Potter about her secret? She had to find out. The girl got up and went to the corridor. "What do you want?" she asked coolly after she had closed the compartment door.

"Look," Potter said nervously, "the other day you were involved in a brawl that was not yours. I never meant to offend you."

He didn´t know. He thought the conflict wasn´t hers. Lily stiffled a sigh of relief.

"You know I like you," Potter continued. "I still want to go out with you." He smiled and blushed.

He wanted to go out with her? Was he stupid or impudent?

"Potter," Lily answered coldly. "I meant every single word I said to you by the lakeshore. You may hope for a date with me after you saw me go out with the giant squid."

"Come on, Evans," Potter cried. "I apologized!"

"You did. And now everything is OK? You stopped being a bullying idiot?" Lily laughed. It sounded bitter.

Potter bit his lip. "I´ll prove it. I´ll prove that I´m not as bad a person as you think and one day you´ll go out with me."

"You wish, Potter." Lily turned on her heel and went back to the girls.

-x-

The car ride seemed endless although there was no jam. They had to answer questions all the time. Mr Evans was confused when they told him they didn´t know their examination results yet. Lily had to explain about OWLs and the way the results were to be delivered in summer.

Mrs Evans greeted them cheerfully and asked Lily to help her in the kitchen. "You know, dear, your sister chose exactly this evening to introduce us to her friend. He´s coming for dinner."

"She waited for us to be back?" Lily was doubtful.

Mrs Evans blushed. "She wanted to do it yesterday, but I said she had to wait. He has to meet the whole family. So she fixed today. I´m not sure, but I think she means to spoil your welcome dinner."

Lily giggled. "Dear Petunia! Always so caring!" Her problems with her sister seemed minor and riddiculous after what she had to face at school.

"Hello, Mrs Evans!" Severus entered the kitchen. He had helped Lily´s father with the luggage.

"Hello, dear!" Mrs Evans wiped her hands and hugged the boy. "You´ve grown again! Are you hungry? I have walnut cookies." She pointed at the plate.

"No, thank you. Do you need help?"

"Do you think you can slice the carrots for me?"

"What size Mrs Evans?"

Lily giggled. "The way you´d have them for pep-up potion would be OK."

Severus nodded and set to work.

"We´re going to meet Petunia´s boyfriend this evening." Lily said after a short pause.

"Still the same? The fat one, Mrs Evans?"

Mrs Evans nodded.

"I forgot!" Lily cried. "You´ve already seen him!"

"Only through the curtains. By the way, shouldn´t Petunia help with the dinner seeing that it´s for her friend?"

"Are you crazy, boy?" Mrs Evans was scandalized. "The three of you in one kitchen? I turned her offer down as I wanted to have a chat with the two of you. I hope you don´t mind having to help."

"Not at all, Mrs Evans."

-x-

Petunia came to the kitchen ten minutes before her friend was supposed to arrive. She eyed Lily and Severus critically. "Not one word about your... abnormity," she hissed. "And don´t you have a decent shirt?" She examined Severus´s shirt dissaprovingly. Its sleeves were some centimeters too short for him and a button was loose.

"Petunia is right, dear," Mrs Evans said. "We have to get you a different shirt. Come, my husband will lend you one." She took the boy upstairs.

When they came back five minutes later, Severus was wearing one of Mr Evans shirts. Its sleeves were long enough and the dark red suited him well, but he was a bit too slim for it.

Petunia sighed. "That´s better. I only wish we could do something about your long hair."

"I´m not going to cut my hair!"

"I was afraid you were going to say that. Can´t you at least bind it together?"

"No!"

-x-

Petunia´s friend called at exactly 6pm. He brought a bunch of pinks for Petunia and a small potplant for Mrs Evans.

"Mum, Dad, this," Petunia beamed, "is Vernon."

Vernon was one head shorter than Mr Evans. In compensation he was twice as wide. Lily thought he looked rather like a ball than a man. He had nearly no neck and above his mouth were some hairs, which seemingly were supposed to become a moustache.

He greeted Mrs and Mr Evans very politely and was welcomed warmly to the dining room.

As Petunia made no move to introduce Lily and Severus, Mrs Evans took over.

"Vernon," she said, "meet our younger daughter Lily and our son Severus. They came home from boarding school only today."

Vernon shook hands with the two. "He´s not really my brother," Petunia interjected. "My foster-brother." Mr Evans shot her a glance. Severus was pleased to be introduced as the Evans´ son.

Lily helped her mother serve dinner. It was roast pork and various vegetables. Everybody was eating with a good appetite.

Mr Evans interviewed Vernon about his career plans. The young man was too glad to talk about this topic. "I started at Grunnings only last week," he explained. "It´s a promising enterprise, which offers plenty of opportunity for promotion. I even could be director one day if I do well."

"I´m sure you will, Vernon!" Petunia cried.

Vernon was pleased. "So you two are still going to school," he tried to include the children into the conversation. "What´s your favorite subject?"

There was an awkward silence only interrupted by Petunia´s cough. She nearly suffocated on a pea.

"Chemistry," said Severus. "French," Lily added.

"French!" Vernon cried. "A foreign language is very useful for business."

"Lily has been to France for a year," Mrs Evans explained. They chatted about France for a while. Lily had to tell about the factories she had visited. Boarding school was not mentioned again.

-x-

"That was close," Mrs Evans sighed when Petunia and Vernon had left for a nighttime stroll. "He seems to be nice."

"A bit small, perhaps." Mr Evans added.

"Is it OK, if we go for a walk, too?" Lily asked.

Mrs Evans gave her permission. "Good night," Severus said, "see you in the morning, Mrs and Mr Evans." He held the door open for Lily.

Mr Evans watched them leave with a thoughtful expression. He went over to the window and glanced through the courtains.

Outside on the pavement Severus took Lily´s hand in his.

-x-

They went to the Snape house in silence. Severus kissed Lily as soon as the door had closed behind them. "I longed to do this so much!" he whispered when he led the way to the living room sofa.

Lily sighed and sat beside him. "So did I, love." She rested her head against his shoulder. "I´m so sorry about last week."

"It´s over, let´s not talk about it."

"We have to! There are things you have to know!"

"Not today. Please!"

"OK. Not today." They kissed again.

-x-

Lily returned to her parents´ house barely half an hour after she had left. She knew her mother would be waiting for her to have a chat. To her surprise both her parents were still up, though her father went to bed soon after she arrived. "Don´t want to intrude on a women´s chat," he said cheerfully.

Lily and her mother stayed up for another hour. Lily told about OWLs and how the examiner had liked her cup charm.

Petunia returned when Lily was explaining how she had turned the crow into a vase ("I made it look like the one you inherited from Granny!"). Against her habit she didn´t leave the room although magic was discussed. She waited for Lily to finish and then asked her mother excitedly: "What do you think, mum? Isn´t he wonderful?" She shot her sister a sharp look.

Lily understood that she wasn´t to be part of this conversation and went to bed.

-x-

"I need to go to the market garden," Mr Evans said as he took a sip of tea the next morning. "What about it? Do you want to come?" He looked at Lily and Severus expectantly.

"That would be great, dad. We could get some seeds for the herb patch."

"I thought you´d like that."

They finished breakfast quickly and went shopping. Mr Evans got a new hose. Lily and Severus chose some seeds from the market´s rich supply.

"What about an ice-cream?" Mr Evans asked when they left the shop. Lily and Severus agreed. They carried their purchases to the car and went back to the shopping center where they found themselves a quiet table in an ice-cream parlour.

While they waited for their ice-creams, Mr Evans told the story how he ruined his old hose. (It involved a rake.)

"Yesterday evening I happened to look out of the window when you left," he touched the heart of matters when the waiter had brought their ice-creams.

Lily took a spoonful of strawberry ice-cream.

"You certainly know, what I saw." Mr Evans continued.

Lily didn´t understand. What had there been to be seen and talked about?

"You saw me hold Lily´s hand." Severus said.

"I did." Mr Evans was very earnest. "How long have you been... holding hands?"

"Since Lily returned from France." Severus was earnest, too.

"You are aware that she´s only fifteen."

"Yes, Sir."

"You have been holding hands and ...?" Mr Evans looked at the boy questioningly.

"Dad!"

"Lily?"

"That´s embarassing! You´re talking about me as if I wasn´t here!"

"Sorry! So you want to answer my question?"

Lily blushed.

Severus put down his spoon. "Sir," he said solemnly, "we have been holding hands and sometimes kissing, but nothing more."

"Nothing more?"

"No. Nothing more. You don´t need to be worried."

"There will be nothing more."

"Dad, stop this!"

Mr Evans was not easily stopped. "You remember that conversation we had some years ago, Severus?"

"The one about where I was to stay at night? I do, Sir. I never broke the word I gave you then, and I don´t intend to."

"Lily, I want your word, too."

"What do you think of me? By the way, did you have this conversation with Petunia and Vernon, too?"

Mr Evans was taken aback. "No, but don´t change topic. There will be no more afternoons at the Snape house unless I get your word that nothing, uhm, will happen there, which your mother and I will not approve of."

Lily was furious now. "This is not fair. You´re treating us like criminals. It´s not criminal to like each other."

"It´s not. But both of you are very young and there are certain forms of ´liking each other´, which are not fit for your age. I want your word, that nothing inappropriate is going to happen."

"You have my word, dad. We´re going to behave well."

Mr Evans started eating what was left of his ice-cream.

-x-

"Will you tell mum?" Lily asked back in the car.

"No, I don´t think so. It would only upset her. Severus, when you stay at our house over night next time, I shall expect you to take the sofa."

"Yes, Sir."

"How are we going to explain this to mum?"

"He´s too tall for the air-mattress."

-x-

Once he had been introduced to the family, Vernon called more frequently at the Evans´ home. He came in to greet the family when he picked up Petunia and he was invited for dinner twice.

August had only started when he came in the morning to collect Petunia for a trip to the seaside. He gladly accepted Mrs Evans´ offer to join the family for breakfast as Petunia wasn´t ready yet. "My boss offered me this day off," he explained proudly between two bites of buttered toast. "Said I deserved it for my good work."

Mrs Evans nodded and smiled. "Congratulations, Vernon! Some more coffee?" She refilled his cup. Petunia finally made her appearance and helped herself to a cup, too.

"I´m not hungry," she said. "We can eat at a snack bar later. Let´s go, dear, or the roads will be crowded." She gazed at Lily and Severus, who had tried to stay outside the conversation in order to avoid mentioning magic by mistake.

"I´m coming, Petunia," Vernon answered happily and drained his cup. He got up and turned to say good-bye to Mrs Evans. "AAAAAARGH!" Two large barn owls had crashed into him. Pandemonium broke loose. Petunia shrieked at the top of her lungs. Lily felt reminded of the day when she got her first letter. Vernon tried to hit the birds. The owls hooted and flapped their wings. Mrs Evans tried to save her coffee-pot. Lily and Severus tried to catch the owls. Unfortunately the two birds insisted on giving their letters to the right student.

"You try the other owl!" cried Severus and hurried around the table. Finally he managed to get hold of the bird, which had refused to give the letter it was carrying to Lily. He removed the letter from its leg and gave it a piece of toast. Immediately the owl left through the open window. Lily caught the other bird, freed it of its delivery and sent it off with a piece of cheese. Quickly she stuffed the letter into her pocket.

She took Severus by his sleeve and they left the kitchen to go upstairs. When they closed the door, they heard Mrs Evans say something about calling the ornithological station to ask for an explanation of the birds´ odd behavior.

"Our OWLs!" Lily cried as soon as they had reached her room. They opened their letters immediately. Lily had Es in Defence and Transfiguration and an A in History of Magic. The rest were Os. "What have you got?" she asked and tried to get a look at Severus´s letter. He handed it over. "Wow! That´s excellent!" He had As in Transfiguration and History of Magic and Os in all his other subjects.

They hugged happily and started making plans which subjects to choose for NEWTs. It was an easy choice concerning Potions, Charms and Runes. But what else to take?

They were absorbed in a discussion whether to go on with Care of Magical Creatures or not when Mrs Evans came upstairs.

"I sorted it out for the moment and sent them to the beach," she sighed. "What was that about?"

Lily presented her letter. Mrs Evans read it and beamed at her daughter. "Well done, dear! That´s excellent!" She hugged the girl. "And you, Severus? Did you do as well?" Severus handed her his letter. "You did! Congratulations!" She hugged the boy, too. "Come downstairs, you two. I´ll get you some ice-cream as a reward!"

-x-

"How come your worst subject is Transfiguration?" Mrs Evans asked as she put two large bowls of chocolate ice-cream on the table. "I understand that History of Magic is boring. You told me so, but I thought you liked Transfiguration!"

Severus´ face had gone blank. "The questions were very difficult, mum. Maybe we didn´t work hard enough." Lily stepped in.

"Well, maybe. You must have been exhausted after all the hard work for your other subjects. Oh, I´m so proud of both of you." Mrs Evans beamed.

"Thanks, mum." – "Thank you, Mrs Evans."

They enjoyed their ice-creams.

"About those owls, dears. They caused quite some trouble. Vernon asks questions. I managed getting rid of him for the moment, but I´m afraid, he´ll resume asking when he meets you again."

"What shall we do?"

"I´d like to get you out of the house for some days, to be honest. Until the worst excitement is over."

"Where are we to go?"

"I thought you could go on a hiking trip again. If you don´t mind, that is."

Lily and Severus exchanged glances. "We´d like that. It´s the right time to pick arnica. But will dad allow it?"

"I called him. He´ll be home early."


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19: In the Moors

Mr Evans was not delighted at the idea of his daughter and her boyfriend spending some days at the moors without supervision. On the other hand he understood his wife´s wish to keep them away from Vernon. Finally he agreed to drive them to the moors. Lily went upstairs to pack her rucksack. Mr Evans packed the tent and sleeping bags. Severus went to his house to get his things. Mrs Evans packed tins, juice bottles and cookies into a bag.

"Will you be able to carry all this?" Mrs Evans asked in concern when her husband put the luggage into the boot.

"Of course they will, dear. The boy is as tall as I am by now. He can carry most of it alone."

"I can carry my share, dad. Severus is not my mule." Lily insisted.

"He´s not. I was just pointing out to your mother that the two of you will manage the luggage."

Mrs Evans hugged the children good-bye, advised them to take care and off they went.

"You remember our conversation?" Mr Evans reminded them on the ride.

"Dad!"

-x-

"We´ll find a nice place for our tent today and start collecting herbs tomorrow," Severus suggested. "This way you won´t get too exhausted."

"Are you afraid I´m going to be a pest?" Lily grinned.

"A bit."

"Which direction?" Lily looked around.

"We´ll start south. I fixed our route with your dad."

"He´s mistrusting us."

"Nonsense. He cares for us and he wants to know where to find us. That´s OK." Severus started south. He carried the tent and the food bag in addition to his private rucksack. Lily had the sleeping bags.

They hiked for nearly three hours, had a quick lunch and went on for another two hours. Finally Severus pointed out a group of bushes. "These will shield us from the wind."

"Are you very tired?" he asked when Lily dropped her bags.

"A bit. Not enough to be a pest I hope." The girl smiled.

Severus pitched up the tent while Lily took a rest. They shared a tin of soup for supper and when the stars appeared in the sky they lay side by side in the grass and looked for constellations like they had done some years before. Only now they needed no star chart. After five years of astronomy lessons the nocturnal sky was well-known to them.

"We have to talk about what happened at Hogwarts," Lily said after having listed the moons of Jupiter.

"I don´t want to."

"Nor do I, but it´s necessary. We might as well do it now and have it done."

"Mmh."

"I´m sorry. I made things worse."

"It was not your fault. I was careless and they got me."

There was a short silence. "There was no need to call me Snivellus."

"That was for adding ´filthy´." Lily turned and kissed her friend. "Forgiven?"

"Weeks ago."

The girl settled back on Severus´s shoulder.

"I lost my mirror that day," the boy said.

"I know."

"How come? Who told you? It happened after you left."

"Black."

Severus sat bolt upright. "Ouch!" Lily rubbed her head.

"Black told you?"

Lily explained how she had tried to check on Severus and Black had found out about the true nature of their relationship. The boy was upset. "Is he blackmailing you?"

"We got a deal."

"A deal? Tell me!"

"My mirror for his silence."

"Nothing more?"

"Nothing more. I threatened I´d give you to the vultures if he pushed me too far. He took the mirror. Feared to get nothing instead."

"Give ME to the vultures? What about you?"

"He pointed out before that you´d get in bigger trouble in Slytherin than I in Gryffindor." Lily hesitated for a moment. "He said life wouldn´t be easy for a mudblood-snogger in Slytherin house. He hinted you were bullied for being a halfblood." She waited for an answer, but there was none.

"Severus, are you being bullied for being a halfblood?"

The minutes stretched in silence. "You are, aren´t you? Why didn´t you tell me?"

"How could I?" the boy sounded bitter. "Life is light-hearted and easy while I´m with you. You can´t expect me to ruin this by complaining how bad it is when you´re not around. You couldn´t have done anything about it, anyway."

"Poor you!" Lily hugged her friend and silent tears wetted her cheeks.

"Let´s go to sleep," Severus suggested some minutes later. Lily nodded. She wiped her face pretending to rummage in her bag.

The girl took her sleeping bag and crawled into the tent. She waited for some minutes for her friend to come, but he didn´t.

"Severus, where are you?"

"Out here!"

"What are you doing there?"

"Sleeping!"

"Outside?"

"Your dad doesn´t want me to sleep in your room. I assume he wouldn´t like me in your tent either."

"You´re being ridiculous."

"I´m keeping my word."

"You´re going to freeze."

"Nonsense. It´s warm out here."

-x-

They spent the next days with picking herbs and chatting happily. Hogwarts was not mentioned.

It was their fifth night in the moors when Lily was woken in the middle of the night by the sound of rain.

"Severus?"

"Yes?"

"Is this rain I hear? Come in! You´re going to catch a cold!"

"It´s only a few drops."

"By the sound of it, it´s pouring. Come in!"

"I´m warm in my sleeping bag."

"You come in or I´ll come out. You don´t want me to get wet, do you?"

"Extortionist."

"What will it be? Both inside or both outside?"

"I´m coming!"

The boy crawled into the tent dragging his sleeping bag behind him.

"Look at you! You´re wet to the skin! Take off those wet clothes."

"No!"

"What?"

"Your dad is going to kill me!"

"You don´t think I´m going to touch you, cold and wet as you are. I´d catch a pneumonia doing so. I´ll turn around and not watch you. Don´t be silly, you have to put on some warm, dry clothes." Lily turned her back on Severus and started rummaging in his bag for dry clothes. "Here!" She threw a pair of jeans behind her. "Where is your pullover? You can´t have taken only these thin shirts with you."

"I have."

"My bag is back there. Take my pullover."

Lily could hear Severus open her bag. "You can´t be serious. I´m not going to wear this."

"It´s warm. Put it on."

"Give me a shirt."

"I´ll turn round on the count of three. One...two..."

"You´re a pest!"

"I know. Two and a half..."

"I´ve put it on. You can turn round. I´ll strangle you, if you laugh."

Lily turned to face her friend. She tried to suppress laughter, but couldn´t.

"Sorry, love!" she wiped tears from her eyes. "Pink is definitely not your color." She giggled.

"Nor is it really yours. Why does a redhaired girl have a pink pullover?"

"It used to be Petunia´s. Mum gave it to me, when it got too small for her."

"You are aware that I have to kill you now?"

"Please, don´t, I beg you!" Lily giggled and tried to escape the boy in the small tent.

"I´ll tickle you to death!" Severus cried and went after his prey.

"I´ll fight back! I warn you." Lily shrieked.

They fought a fierce battle, trying to get the other and tickle him or her. "I surrender! You win!" Lily panted at last.

"What´s my trophy?" Severus asked.

"You may keep the pullover."

"That´s not an acceptable trophy."

"What do you want?"

"A kiss!"

Lily surrendered the trophy.

"I´ll keep the pullover as an extra."

-x-

It rained the whole next day and they stayed in the tent. They enjoyed it in the beginning, chatting and giggling, but it became boring in the afternoon.

"I´m glad dad´s going to pick us up tomorrow," Lily admitted in the evening. "Camping is not funny in the rain."

"It´s wet and cold," admitted Severus and sneezed.

"It´s time we get you some of that pepper-up potion."

"We don´t have pepper-up potion."

"Don´t we? I thought there was some left in your mother´s storeroom."

"No, I used it up last winter."

"Can we make some new?"

"No, it requires a wand."

"What a pity. We´ll have to heal you the muggle way. Tea and chicken soup."

"I don´t like chicken soup."

-x-

They had to walk back to the meeting point in the rain the next day. When they reached it, both were wet to the skin, Mr Evans was already waiting for them.

"Come into the car, quickly," he cried and took their bags to pack them into the boot. "There are towels and dry clothes in that bag on the back seat," he explained when he sat on the driver´s seat. "And your mother made you a Thermos of hot tea."

"Thank you, Sir," Severus sneezed and started drying his hair with a towel.

"Turn round," Lily ordered. "I want to get out of my wet clothes or I´ll catch a cold, too."

Severus obeyed. Beside him Lily changed into a dry track-suit.

"You get out of those wet things, too, boy. What is that you´re wearing, by the way?"

"I had to borrow a pullover from Lily, Sir."

"Pink is not your color, you know."

"Yes, Sir." Severus sneezed again. Lily looked out of the opposite window and the boy changed into dry clothes, too.

"Have some hot tea now, both of you!" Mr Evans was concerned. "Severus, you seem ill, already. Will you need a doctor?"

"No, Sir, just a cold."

-x-

´Just a cold´ turned out to come with fever and chill. The Evans´ decided that Severus was too ill to sleep in his house and Lily gave up her room for him. The girl went to sleep on the sofa.

When the boy showed no sign of improvement after a night´s sleep, Mrs Evans called a doctor.

"Take a deep breath," the doctor ordered. "Good, again please. – Cough now!" He examined the boy carefully. "I´m afraid, Mrs Evans, we have a case of pneumonia here." He finally said. "Let him stay in bed, give him hot tea and this." He handed Mrs Evans a prescription.

"Is it contagious? My daughter will want to keep him company. Can I allow this?"

"As you told me, he cought it due to cold, I see no problem. But she should not sleep in the same room."

"She won´t. Thank you, doctor."

Mrs Evans went to get Severus´s medicine at once.

"Poor you," Lily sat on the bed. "You´ll feel better once you got your medication."

"I´m sure I will."

"Can I get you something?"

"No, thank you. I don´t need anything."

-x-

"I don´t understand this. It says, the fever should go down within hours." Mrs Evans consulted the instructions for use what must have been for the hundredth time. "You have been taking this for two days now."

Severus was still lying in Lily´s bed. He looked paler than ever and coughed and sneezed all the time.

"How did you catch that anyway. Lily´s not ill," Mrs Evans continued.

"He slept outside, Mum," Lily explained. "In the rain. At least for a while. I told you you were being stupid," she scolded the boy.

Severus sneezed.

"Why would he do a thing like that?"

"Dad gave a little ´Don´t crawl into my daughter´s bed´-speech on our way to the moors."

"What?"

Severus sneezed again.

Lily sighed. If she couldn´t tell her mother, she couldn´t tell anyone. "We have been, well, kissing and dad knows."

"And he made the boy sleep in the rain?"

"No, he didn´t say he had to sleep outside. Severus exagerated in keeping his word to stay away from me."

"Poor boy. A pneumonia is a high prize for that. Try to sleep a little, dear. We´ll make you some fresh tea."

-x-

"You were not surprised to hear about me and Severus," Lily stated while she prepared tea in the kitchen. "Did dad tell you?"

"No, dear. But I´m not blind, you know. I really hope he´ll get better, soon."

"I´m thinking about writing to professor Dumbledore. A pneumonia is an easy thing for a healer."

"A healer?"

"A witch doctor."

"I didn´t know there were witch doctors."

"I´m thinking about becoming one myself."

"My daughter a doctor? Wonderful, dear! And you really think a healer could help? Go ahead, then. Write that letter. We don´t want Severus to suffer."

-x-

Half an hour later D´Artagnan was on his way to find Albus Dumbledore. He carried a letter saying that Severus was very ill and did not react to muggle medication as supposed to and asked for a healer´s assistance.

It was only hours later that the Hogwarts nurse, dressed in a navy blue muggle cocktail dress, arrived at the Evans´ house.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20: A Secret Revealed

"What have you done to this boy?" she asked sternly after examining the patient. "He´s very ill."

"You will be able to help him, won´t you?" Lily asked anxiously and her mother nodded.

"I will, but I need to brew him some fresh healing draught. And he will not be well in one day. You should have called me earlier." She made room on Lily´s desk and set up a cauldron. "Oh no, I´m short of decoction of hips!"

"I can get you some from our lab," offered Lily.

The nurse eyed the girl critically. "You are the one, who brewed the supplies for the hospital wing last year, aren´t you? I´ll need the decoction in twenty minutes. Can you get it that quickly?"

Lily nodded and raced out of the room. When she came back fifteen minutes later with a bottle of decoction of hips, a potion was bubbling merrily in the cauldron. Despite his fever Severus was sitting in bed and watching the nurse carefully. He was even taking notes.

"You can´t be as ill as I thought you were," Lily said and smiled encouragingly at the boy. "Here!" She handed the nurse the bottle.

The nurse opened it and sniffed. "This is of superb quality! Did you make it?" She added two spoonfuls to the potion. "Don´t cough into the cauldron, boy."

"You make sure he takes a spoonful every two hours," said the nurse a quarter hour later and stoppered a brown glass bottle. "And in the evening you make him drink all of this." A small green bottle. "When he wakes you restart with the spoonful every two hours. I´ll come back tomorrow afternoon to make more. This is best in the first twentyfour hours. And give him chicken soup. It´s a muggle trick, but it works."

"He doesn´t like chicken soup."

"Who cares. It´s healer´s orders." She faced the patient. "You will eat chicken soup."

-x-

"I wish we hadn´t invited Vernon for lunch on Sunday. He finally stopped asking questions after the owl incident but a doctor in a cocktail dress will make him suspicious again." Mrs Evans sighed.

"You don´t suggest to cancel his invitation, mum!" Petunia was upset. "This has been appointed for more than a week! What am I to tell him?"

"No, no, dear! I'm not talking about cancelling, I´m suggesting being cautious. Would you please bring that bowl of soup upstairs?"

"There are three of them in that room. You don´t expect me to go in there!"

"You´re not being helpful, , give me that bowl, girl. You stir the stew." Mrs Evans went upstairs herself.

"How is the patient?" she asked when she entered the room.

"Much better," the nurse replied. In his bed Severus sneezed and for a moment green sparks surrounded him. "This is perfectly normal, if you take this potion," the nurse reassured Mrs Evans. "At least for a powerful wizard. I wouldn´t have expected it to occur with a kid. Are you doing wandless magic, dear?"

"Only if I´m very angry," Severus replied.

"It always starts with strong emotions. You´ll see, it will become easier soon." The nurse smiled. "You take extra care for secrecy, Mrs Evans," the nurse pointed out. "There´s no way to controll that spark thingy. It will only last two or three days, though."

-x-

Sunday lunch was delicious. Petunia had helped her mother in the kitchen. She was a good cook. Lily had not known that. She was a bit sad that she had missed her sister´s developing excellent cooking abilities for it showed her how far magic had separated them.

Vernon came as punctually as ever. This time he brought a potplant for Mrs Evans and red roses for Petunia.

After the meal they had coffee in the living room. Vernon cleared his throat and finally, to everybody´s surprise, asked Mr Evans´ permission to marry Petunia. The girl beamed.

"Are you aware, Vernon," asked Mr Evans, "that you´re a bit young to marry?"

"I don´t think that twenty is too young, Sir," Vernon answered. "But I wasn´t thinking of arranging the wedding for next week. I thought next summer would be nice. It would give us plenty of time to look for a house or an appartment, prepare the wedding and enjoy our engagement."

Mr and Mrs Evans exchanged glances. "I´ll get some champagne," said Mrs Evans. "You got my permission," said Mr Evans. "Welcome to our family, son."

Petunia uttered a cry of joy and fell on Vernon´s neck, who kissed her on her cheek. "I´ve got something for you, Petunia," he said and rummaged in the pocket of his jacket. "Here. Will you give me the honor to wear this?" He handed her a small box.

Petunia opened it and shrieked with excitement. In the box was a gold ring with a small diamond. "I wish the stone was bigger, but I thought I´d save the money for our home." Vernon said. "It´s perfect, Vernon!" Petunia beamed. "You slip it on my finger!" She held out her hand and the box. Vernon did as he was asked and Petunia presented her now beringed hand to the family.

"It´s beautiful, Vernon," said Lily and her father agreed.

"Mum, look," cried Petunia happily and showed the ring to her mother who had just returned from the kitchen with glasses and a bottle of champagne.

"That´s wonderful, dear!" said Mrs Evans. "Vernon, would you please open the bottle?" Vernon did and started filling the glasses. "No alcohol for Lily, Vernon. I brought her some orange juice to touch glasses."

"I wanted to ask earlier, but I was so nervous because of my proposal, Mrs Evans. Where´s your son?" Vernon asked while he handed glasses to the family.

"He´s upstairs, he caught a terrible cold last week," explained Mrs Evans.

"We should deliver the good news to him," suggested Vernon. "It will cheer him up."

"We´d better not disturb him, he´ll be asleep."

"But I´d love to tell him! We´re sort of brothers now!"

Mrs Evans bit her lip. "Lily, you go and have a look whether he´s awake," she suggested.

"Yes, mum." Lily left for her room, Vernon followed her.

"Vernon, dear, we´d really rather not disturb him," cried Petunia and followed her fiancé.

Vernon went into Lily´s room right behind her. Severus was reading a book. He looked up. "What´s going on," he asked. "Vernon?"

"Severus," Vernon beamed. "We´ve come upstairs to bring you good news. I just got permission to marry your sister."

"Congratulations, Vernon and Petunia," Severus said. Then he sneezed.

-x-

Pandemonium broke loose once again. Petunia shrieked and Vernon cried "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" as if these were the only words he was capable of. Mrs and Mr Evans came to the room just in time to see the last green sparks dissolve.

"Calm down, Petunia!" said Mr Evans. "Vernon, son, I´d have prefered a different way to tell you but you just discovered our family secret. Severus is a wizard. We expect you to keep this secret."

"Oh my god!" Vernon was still struggling for words. "Are you... is Petunia...?"

"No," Mr Evans reassured him, "Petunia is not a witch. Only Lily is."

Vernon was relieved. "I´m glad you´re no witch," he said and kissed Petunia´s cheek.

"Let´s go back to the living room," suggested Mrs Evans. "Lily you stay with Severus." She shooed her husband, Petunia and Vernon out of the room.

"I´m sorry," Severus said in a small voice.

"It´s not your fault, dear." Mrs Evans hugged the boy. "Don´t be worried." She followed her husband and the young couple downstairs.

-x-

Mrs Evans came upstairs with a tray of sandwiches hours later. "I´ve brought you supper," she sighed. "This is so difficult. Everytime when your father and I think we have convinced him you´re not dangerous, Petunia becomes hysterical and we have to start it all over."

"Can I help in any way?" asked Lily.

"I´m afraid you can´t," answered Mrs Evans. "We explained to him about your letter and about the wizarding world and how Severus became a member of our family and how you don´t use magic at home out of consideration for Petunia, but Petunia´s not helpful. Vernon is siding with her."

"He should!" said Lily. "He´s going to marry her!"

"That´s right, but it makes things difficult."

"I´m really sorry, Mrs Evans," Severus joined the conversation between two sandwiches. "I didn´t intend to cause trouble."

"I know. There´s nothing you could have done. The doctor said there´s no cure for the sparks. We have to wait until it stops."

The discussion in the living room went on until past midnight. At last Vernon agreed to keep the secret, but only after Mr Evans had pointed out that nobody was going to believe him anyway and all he´d gain was the ruin of his reputation.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21: NEWT Students

September was approaching and Lily and Severus had to make their decision, which subjects to continue.

They had already decided concerning Charms, Potions and Runes early, but what else to take?

They agreed that Defence would be useful though it was not one of Lily´s favourite subjects. "You need to train up your dueling abilities. Think about Black!" Severus pointed out and the girl agreed.

Severus chose Magical Creatures and Herbology as he wanted to be a potion master. Lily was thinking about becoming a healer, so she chose Transfiguration and Herbology.

"If we´re lucky, we´ll have five subjects together!" said Severus when he finished their list.

"That would be great!" Lily answered hopefully.

-x-

After Severus´s recovery they spent some time at their lab. Mostly they were occupied by cleaning things away before closing the lab down for four months.

One day Severus presented Lily with a small parcel. "What´s that for?" asked the girl. "My birthday won´t be before the day after tomorrow."

"Anniversary of our first kiss," the boy murmured.

"Anni...? Oh, you´re so cute!" Lily hugged her friend and kissed him.

"Open it," Severus suggested. Lily noted that he had no objections about being called cute.

She opened the parcel. It held a hair-slide with little white flowers. "That´s beautiful!" Lily exclaimed. "Where did you get it?"

"Made it myself."

"Without magic? How? Look at those flowers!"

"Who said I made it without magic? I made it at Hogwarts back in June."

"While you were supposed to be revising? Did I mention you´re cute?"

"If you say so."

"I have no present for you. I´m a bad girlfriend."

"You´re the best of girlfriends. Your presence is all the present I want."

They kissed again.

-x-

Lily dreaded the beginning of her sixth year at Hogwarts. What if Black broke his promise? After five years of knowing him she was not too confident that he would keep his word. Neither the one concerning keeping the secret nor the one about not asking anything more for doing so. She wished she could confide in Myra but that was out of question. What Myra didn´t know, she couldn´t tell. Lily and Severus had agreed on that a year earlier.

The girl spent the journey on the Hogwarts express watching out for Black and his friends nervously but they were not to be seen. They had nearly reached Hogsmeade station when Potter opened the compartment door and invited Lily to go to the village with him politely. Lily wasn´t sure whether to laugh or not. So Potter didn´t know about Severus or he wouldn´t have asked her in that manner. And he was persistent, which was annoying.

The sorting brought nothing new except that the first years seemed smaller from year to year. The following feast was delicious as ever. The only disturbing thing was Myra´s tale that one of her aunt´s colleagues at ´s had been offered a job and killed when he refused. Lily couldn´t believe it. Probably Myra had misunderstood something. People weren´t killed for declining job offers.

-x-

Professor McGonagall handed out timetables after breakfast the next morning. It was very promising. As students didn´t need to go on with all their subjects, more were all house courses. Lily and Severus were going to see each other in Potions, Ancient Runes, Herbology and Charms, which was far more than in the past.

Their first lesson of the year was Ancient Runes and it turned out to be disappointing. Professor Stonecarver explained that since there were fewer students now (Lily, Severus, Myra and three Ravenclaws) and they needed to prepare properly for their NEWT tests, they had to work alone from now on. So she was going to be in the same classroom with her friend but not able to talk to him more than some quick words while filing in and out of the room.

It was not any different in the other subjects. Only professor Slughorn made no attempt to split his dream team. How could he! They were saving him hours of potion brewing by providing what was needed for the hospital wing, which could only be done when they teamed up. One alone couldn´t finish these tasks during the lessons.

For a whole year they would have only the potions lessons to talk. Lily was sad. Slughorn´s special assignments were not likely to give them much time for talking.

The biggest surprise of the week, however, was the behaviour of the four marauders. They greeted Lily and Myra politely when they met them in the corridors and let them file into classrooms first, a thing they never had done before. When they waited for their first Defence lesson, Black even smiled at Lily, though she wasn´t sure that it wasn´t a calculating grin. She had never seen Black smile at her before.

-x-

On Saturday morning Black came to the Gryffindor table and sat beside Lily. He chose some pumpkin juice and scrambled eggs.

"You know, Evans," he said casually, "I gave it some thinking over the holidays. We are too old for this childish fighting thing and it wouldn´t be helpful for James." He sipped some juice. "I mean, you must have noticed that he´s interested in you and I assume you wouldn´t want to go out with him when his best friend is making life difficult for you. I suggest a truce."

Lily stared at Black in disbelief. "A truce?"

"Why not? It makes sense."

"So I suppose you´ll give me my mirrors back?"

"I wish I could. It would be a splendid sign of good will. But, alas, I can´t." Black chose a muffin. "I gave one to James. I can´t ask it back from him without telling him why. I guess you still want to keep your secret, don´t you?"

Lily nodded.

"So, no mirrors, sorry. Can you pass me the honey, please?"

Lily did so. "This truce includes whom?" she asked.

"Well, all of us."

Lily looked around. There was no one sitting near enough to listen in but Myra. "What about Severus?"

Black sighed. "As a sign of good will, I´ll include Snivellus. You really should consider going out with James. I´m not asking this from you, I just beg you to give it a thought. The poor chap is beside himself because of you."

Black ate his breakfast in silence and left after some minutes.

"Tell me I´m dreaming," whispered Myra as soon as he was gone.

-x-

Though it seemed too good to be true, Black kept his promise. The marauders were perfectly friendly to Lily and neutral to Severus as far as Lily could judge. The first Hogsmeade weekend was announced to be shortly before Halloween. Potter came again to ask Lily out and she declined once more. Instead she met Severus in the forest near the village.

Lily had cast her spell to see through Potter´s cloak. She didn´t know whether his parents had given him permission to take it back to Hogwarts but she wanted to make sure to know if they were observed. Neither Potter nor any other of the marauders were to be seen.

Severus and Lily enjoyed a good chat and practiced some dueling. They helped each other up because it gave them a chance to touch but they didn´t dare to kiss. It was too risky.

Later Lily met Myra and Pierre at the Three Broomsticks and the girls went back to the castle together.

"I told Severus about Black´s truce. He thinks we should keep an eye on him and his cronies nevertheless." Lily reported to Myra.

"Right he is," answered Myra. "Black´s not to be trusted."

"What´s new in France?" asked Lily.

"Not much," said Myra, "Angelique seems to be very busy. She didn´t send any message. And to be honest, we were not talking much, me and Pierre." The girl blushed.

"You kissed?" Lily grinned. "You must tell me everything! How was it?"

Myra blushed crimson. "You go and find out yourself!"

Lily smiled.

-x-

Autumn passed with no special events and soon the Hogwarts grounds were covered in snow. Professor Slughorn gave one of his Christmas parties for the group he called the Slug Club. Lily and Myra had drinks with Black and Potter again. As the truce lasted for nearly four months now, it wasn´t too unpleasant although Lily would have prefered different company.

Slughorn came to greet them on his round and praised Lily for her great work during their last lesson. (She and Severus had made two jars of salves in addition to the normal assignment.) He suggested to Black and Potter to take a leaf out of Lily´s book to improve in potions.

"How can I take a leaf out of your book when I don´t know what you´re doing. How come you are that good at potions, Evans?" asked Potter.

"I really like it," answered Lily "and I read my textbook during the holidays. I tried some things out at mum´s kitchen, too."

Potter looked thoughtful. "You can practice potions at home?"

"Not advanced but the basic things which don´t require a wand."

This time Lily was sure that Black´s smile was calculating. "So you will work on potions during the Christmas holidays?" he asked.

Lily nodded.

"You won´t go anywhere special during the break?" Black changed topic.

"No, just home to my family."

"I will go to France!" Myra interjected but Black overheard it.

"Your parents will give Snape a lift when you arrive at London?"

"They always do. They´ve known the Snapes for years." Don´t give him new information about Severus.

"So your families live in the neighbourhood?"

"Not exactly in the neighbourhood but it´s not too far." Lily would have prefered to keep this piece of information but didn´t know how to ignore a direct question without endangering the truce.

"I´m so looking forward to seeing my auntie!" Myra said and started telling about her cousins and how they were celebrating Christmas in France. Black couldn´t interrupt without being rude. Lily could tell he´d rather have learned more about the relationships between the Evans and Snape families. She could have hugged Myra for the change of topic.

-x-

The journey home was not unusual apart from Potter´s appearance at the girls´ compartment where he gave Lily a small parcel wrapped in red and gold paper. Lily didn´t really want to take a present from him but it would have been rude not to accept it. So she thanked Potter and put the parcel into her bag. Potter smiled and wished her a pleasant break. The girls burst into giggles as soon as he had left.

"I really don´t know," said Kassandra, "why he doesn´t give up. I mean, look at him! He´s the Gryffindor Quidditch captain. Every girl in the house would be too happy to go out with him and you´ve declined his offers for what, over a year, now!"

"I wouldn´t be happy to go out with him either," Myra pointed out.

"That´s just because you´ve a crush on your Frenchman!" cried Eloise. "If you hadn´t you´d want to go out with Potter."

They had some fun teasing Myra about Pierre and Potter. Finally they reached London.

-x-

"That´s delicious," Severus said. They were having their usual back home chat on the sofa in his house after supper at Lily´s.

"Mmh," answered Lily and helped herself to another piece of chocolate.

"It was wrapped in gift paper. Who gave it to you?" the boy asked.

"Potter," Lily licked chocolate off her fingertips.

Severus sat bolt upright nearly knocking his friend from the sofa. "Potter!" he cried. "How dare he!"

"Come on, dear! Don´t make a big deal of it. He gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas and I´m sharing it with you. Come, enjoy!" She offered the box to her friend.

"I won´t eat anything Potter gave you."

"Don´t be stupid. You already did. And what´s better: me eating Potter´s chocolates alone or you and me sharing Potter´s chocolates?"

Severus gave it a thought. "Pass the box!" he said after some moments.

-x-

"We have to watch the marauders even if they don´t make trouble at the moment," said Lily. They were on a walk through the forest to get some hours without Petunia and Vernon. The two of them were at the Evans´ house every day. They had named a day for their wedding in July and were now making plans for it and though they had nothing against Mrs or Mr Evans´ ideas, they eyed Lily and Severus suspiciously when they were around. Lily doubted seriously they were going to be invited.

"We have to," Severus agreed. "Did you realise that Lupin´s ill quite a lot? I never noticed before because I had only Potions with Gryffindor but he´s missing loads of classes."

Lily tried to remember the previous years. "He´s always been ill a lot," she said.

"I wonder what this is about," Severus said pensively.

-x-

Winter passed quickly. Lily had a feeling that her life was moving around studying and waiting for the next Hogsmeade weekend. Lessons were getting harder and harder and the teachers seemed to think they had to take their NEWTs next week. Homeworks were getting longer and longer and assignments under ten feet of parchment became rare. Especially professor McGonagall was putting her students through their paces. Lily wondered how people managed to attend extra activities like Quidditch practice or Gobstone team sessions.

The next Hogsmeade weekend was in February. Lily met Severus near the village again. This time they didn´t remain undisturbed as Black came to the clearing shortly after Lily under Potter´s cloak while Potter was nowhere to be seen. Severus cast a muffliato and they sat under a tree to talk.

"Black is watching us from over there," Lily pointed out.

"Who cares? He can´t hear us and there´s nothing he could see he doesn´t already know."

Lily beamed. "You´re right, you know." She moved closer and kissed the boy.

"Are you crazy?" Severus asked. "Black is watching us!"

"As you yourself said there´s nothing he could see he doesn´t already know."

Severus smiled. "So you´re thinking of giving him a little show?"

Lily was scandalized. "I was thinking of doing what I couldn´t for more than a month. Who cares about Black!"

"Will you forgive this idiot?" the boy asked and put his arm around her shoulders.

"I´ll think about it," Lily said and rested her head against her boyfriend.

"I´m not sure but I may have noticed a pattern in Lupin´s absences." Severus said after a while.

"Which?"

"I told you I´m not sure. I need some more time to check."

They sat under their tree for a while. Then Lily left to meet Myra.

-x-

On Valentine´s day a little white flower appeared beside Lily´s coffee cup out of thin air. She looked at the Slytherin table and Severus winked at her.

A little later Potter came to breakfast and gave Lily a card.

When Lily left for her lessons, she wore the flower in her hair and the card lay forgotten on the table.

-x-

February ended with a bad surprise. Potions, which had been easy for Lily, became difficult. They were moving on to analysing potions. This required the use of a wand so Lily had never done it before. She missed the first two lessons because Slughorn made her and Severus brew healing potions for the hospital wing. When she had to analyse a poison and create an antidote for it in the third lesson ("No special assignment for you two today, we make this a little contest and I won´t take my champs out of the race!") she had no idea how to start.

Severus had worked through that part of the book while Lily spent her year at Beauxbatons but hadn´t been able to try things out either. So he had a better start but wasn´t able to really help her. He needed his time for his own assignment.

Soon Lily was desperate. What if professor Slughorn found out she couldn´t do that? Would he split up their team? This would mean that she had no lessons to talk to Severus at all! The girl was on the edge of tears when her friend moved his book a little closer to her cauldron and cleared his throat.

Oh no! It was his mother´s book and he had written lots of things on the page. Lily sighed. Severus knew perfectly well that she had difficulties with his miniscule handwriting! To Lily´s surprise one sentence was written in big letters over a whole list of antidotes. "Just shove a bezoar down their throats!" She smiled and went over to the cupboard.

Severus came shortly after her and started rummaging on the shelves. "Thanks," Lily whispered and went on looking for a bezoar.

"You´re welcome," the boy whispered back.

"What are you looking for?"

"Monk´s hood."

"Here!" She handed Severus a jar. For a moment their hands touched and they smiled at each other. Then Severus returned to his cauldron and Lily went on with her search.

-x-

Professor Slughorn was not pleased with the lesson´s result. Not one student had finished his antidote so far and he had nearly finished his round through the classroom.

"So here we finally have a decent antidote!" he cried happily when he examined Severus´s cauldron. "Well, this doesn´t come as a surprise. Take ten points for Slytherin, Severus!"

He moved on to Lily´s cauldron where the poison he had given her was boiling down to tarlike consistancy.

"What´s that?" Slughorn turned up his nose. "You were supposed to find an antidote for that!"

Nervously Lily showed the bezoar in her palm.

Slughorn hesitated. "Take twenty points for Gryffindor, Lily!" he roared at last. "You are so right, girl! We could have saved the work as a bezoar would act as an antidote for all of these poisons!" He laughed. "Kids! We have a winner!" He handed Lily a small box of crystallised pineapples.

Lily opened it and offered it to Severus. "You have some," she said loud enough for everybody to hear. "You were the only one to finish the assignment as it was supposed to be."

-x-

"That was cool, Evans," Black said in the common room that evening and sat in the chair beside Lily. "Maybe there´s a bit of a marauder in you."

"I think not," said Lily.

"Why are you being so rude?" Black complained. "I´m trying to make some friendly conversation."

"Are you? Well, I have no time for that."

"Prefer a talk about, let´s say last Hogsmeade excursion?"

"Are you crazy?"

"I thought you´d prefer to chat about potions," Black said in a casual tone. "Hey, James, come here!" He motioned Potter over to them. "I´ve just been telling Evans how cool that bezoar thing was today in Slughorn´s class."

Potter took the seat beside Myra. "I told Sirius earlier I wished I had your intuition concerning potions." He rumpled up his hair, then looked at Lily and put his hand down. "Sorry, forgot you don´t like that."

Lily sighed and closed her Charms book. "Sorry boys," she said, "I really have to finish this essay." She got up and headed for the dormitory. Myra followed. Potter looked disappointed.

-x-

The next morning they found a note in the common room announcing that every student who turned seventeen by the 31st of August or earlier could take apparition lessons. The whole Gryffindor sixth year crowd signed up within minutes.

The first lesson was to take place on the lawn the first Saturday in March. The heads of houses came out of the castle with a witch from the ministry who explained to the students what they had to do.

The heads of houses made sure each student had enough room to practice. Professor McGonagall, being the deputy headmistress, lifted the protective spells to allow them to apparate on the lawn. Professor Flitwick conjured hoops to give each student a goal to apparate to.

They started practicing. First nothing happened. After about a quarter of an hour Severus apparated into his hoop. Only minutes later Potter and Black succeeded. Lily tried hard but she found it impossible to dissolve into thin air and reappear in a different spot.

The lesson was ended by a terrible shriek from Pettigrew. He had managed to move into his hoop but only half. Both his arms and his left leg lay were the boy had been seconds before. The teachers and the ministry witch hurried over to him and professor McGonagall reattached his limbs to his body with a spell. Professor Flitwick conjured a stretcher to move Pettigrew to the hospital wing and the ministry witch murmured something about the worst case of splinching she had witnessed so far.

-x-

"I really don´t know what I´m doing wrong!" sighed Lily at the common room after their third lesson. Nearly every student had managed to apparate into his or her hoop at least once but Lily was one of the few who hadn´t moved one inch.

"It´s because you haven´t much experience with apparition!" suggested Myra. "Most of us have apparated with their parents loads of times. But you have not. You´re not really used to it."

"Do you think so?"

"Of course. But you´ll learn soon. I´m sure of that!" Myra said in a comforting tone.

"Hi Evans," said Black beside them in a soft voice. "I never thought I´d life to see Wormtail be better than you in something!" He took the chair on Lily´s left. "What´s that with you and apparition?"

Lily glared at him. "I really don´t want to discuss that with you!"

"I´m trying to be helpful!"

"You´re not."

"I was just going to point out to you that you lack motivation to move into an empty hoop. Why don´t you picture it wasn´t empty?"

"What?"

"I always picture my aunt waiting for me in the hoop. And – wop! – there I go."

"This could work." Myra said. "I never thought of doing it that way, but it could work."

-x-

Lily tried it out the last Saturday before the Easter break. She pictured Severus in her hoop and seconds later she felt the squeezing behind her navel she had experienced earlier when apparating with professors McGonagall and Dumbledore and the Duponts.

She turned around in her hoop and smiled at Myra in relief. Myra gave her a thumbs up and so did Potter and Black.

A little back in the crowd Severus registered that Lily had solved her problem. He was relieved about that. The fact that Potter and Black offered their congratulations was rather alarming.

-x-

Lily was glad to be back home. She needed time to relax, have a chat with her friend and catch up with potions. She still had difficulties with analysing potions. A discussion with Severus surely would help.

Mrs Evans had cooked a welcome dinner and Petunia had chosen to go out with Vernon. Lily wasn´t disappointed about that. In fact a quiet evening with her parents and Severus was much preferable to a meal spent in painful silence with Petunia. The four of them chatted happily. Mr and Mrs Evans reported the latest news about Petunia´s wedding plans. Mr Evans told how he had viewed some houses with Vernon and Petunia and that the young couple was thinking about moving to Surrey.

Lily and Severus took it in turns to tell about their NEWT courses and how difficult they were and how much homework they had.

When Lily asked for permission for an evening stroll when Severus got up to go to his house, it was granted though with a very severe glare from her father. The girl promissed to be back soon.

-x-

On their way to Severus´s house they started making a schedule for reviewing potions. Though Severus wasn´t in as much trouble as Lily, he agreed he needed to invest some work. When they reached the house, the boy let Lily in first. As soon as the door had closed on them, little white flowers rained down on the girl.

"What´s that?" Lily gasped.

"My first act of magic outside school." Severus smiled. "I´ve been seventeen in January. I´m of age."

"I forgot! I´m so used to thinking you have to be eighteen. And you saved your first spell for me!" Lily beamed.

"Wanted it to be something special," the boy murmured.

"It was, dear, it was." The girl twined her arms around Severus´s neck and kissed him. The boy picked some flowers out of Lily´s hair. Lily reached for one and sniffed. "They smell wonderful! You´re very romantic."

The boy blushed. "You better go back," he sighed.

-x-

The next morning Mrs Evans asked Lily to help her with the laundry and Mr Evans asked Severus to help with renovating the garden fence. Petunia and Vernon were planning their wedding to take place in the garden and Mr Evans wanted everything to be perfect.

"I really would have liked to talk to you about this earlier," said Mrs Evans while she sorted white shirts from the laundry basket into the washing-machine. "But there was so much agitation about Petunia."

Lily put some detergent into the machine. "About what, mum? Doing the laundry?" she asked.

"No," Mrs Evans laughed. "About you and Severus, child!"

"What is there to talk about?" the girl asked. "We like each other and that´s it. This is not going to be an awkward mother and daughter conversation?" She retained from adding ´please´.

"An awkward mother and daughter conversation?"

"Kind of what we had with dad last summer."

"What did your father say?"

"That we are to young for... you know."

"He´s right."

"We know."

"So there will be no..."

"Please mum, stop that! We never thought of... We are kissing, that´s all."

"You leave it that way!" Mrs Evans started the washing-machine.

"We will, mum. Why are parents so wary?"

"We are concerned. You´ll be the same when you have children of your own."

"If I understand your concern right, I'm not to have any."

Mrs Evans stared at her daughter. Lily grinned broadly. "I promise my concern will expire when you´re old enough," Mrs Evans laughed.

-x-

Lily and Severus went to their lab in the afternoon to start revising how to analyse a potion. They had a wand to use now, the only problem was that they had nothing to analyse.

"Let´s see if we can use some of mum´s stuff that´s left," Severus suggested.

They searched the store cupboard for a while. Lily found a vial without a label. They took it to the kitchen and put some of the liquid into a cauldron.

"Do you think the analysis will work if the potion is this old?" Lily asked.

"I´ve no idea. We´ll have to try."

"You speak the spells," Lily ordered. "I want to know what you´re doing. No nonverbals in this kitchen."

"Of course." Severus cast his spell and the potion started to bubble and sever. They devided its components into separate vials and started analysing each.

Some were easy. They were decoctions of plants which Lily and Severus had already made themselves and thus recognized them by their smell and color.

Others were more difficult. They had to consult their textbooks. At last they identified newts´ eyes, dragon bile and a dissolving of human hair.

"What potion is this?" Lily asked.

"I´ve no idea," Severus sighed. "We have to look through the books."

"We may not find it at all. We may not even have gotten the ingredients right."

"I´d really like to know what mum was brewing."

"Let´s have a break and then see whether we find the potion in one of the books."

"OK. Would you like some coffee?"

"Yes, please. I wish we had thought of bringing some cookies or something."

"Let´s see what we can do about it." The boy waved his wand and magicked a plate full of cookies and muffins out of thin air.

"Don´t tell me you´ve studied household charms." Lily took a bite of a cookie.

"No, I haven´t. Not really, at least." Severus answered. "I just looked up how to get me something to eat and one or two cleaning charms. Evanesco, for example, is great for cleaning cauldrons." He poured coffee into two cups. "We might as well sit comfortably." He led the way to the living room.

Lily took the plate and followed.

-x-

"I had a conversation with your dad yesterday," Severus reported and set the cups on the table.

"Oh no! Not you, too." Lily put the plate down and sat beside her friend.

"He talked to you, too? When?"

"Not dad. Mum. It was one of these conversations."

"Mmh, mine too. I found it interesting."

"Interesting? I thought awkward was a better word."

Severus grinned. "Interesting. To be honest, your dad gave me some ideas what we could have done. Unfortunately he made me promiss not to use this information."

"Severus!" Lily was scandalized. "You haven´t been turning inappropriate thoughts about me over in your mind!"

"No! Of course not!"

They both took a sip of coffee.

"Well, perhaps one or two." Severus confessed. He blushed.

"I´d have been disappointed if you hadn´t." Lily giggled.

They kissed.

Severus got up abruptly. "I´m a good boy!" He rushed to the kitchen and returned with some potions books. "Let´s look for mum´s potion!"

Lily giggled.

-x-

They never found out what Mrs Snape had kept in the unlabeled vial. They searched the books but didn´t find one single potion which consisted of the ingredients they thought to have identified. At last they gave up. Probably they had made a mistake in their analysis. So it seemed to be a better idea to practice that than to look through books.

Lily sent D´Artagnan to Myra and asked for her help. Soon the bird returned with a parcel full of vials with potions to analyse. The enclosed letter said that Myra´s mother had not been too happy that her daughter plundered her potions stocks but had agreed when she heard for whom the potions were. Myra sent also a list what was in the vials but it didn´t say which potion was in which vial.

Now they could practice properly and soon they developed good skills at this task. After all they had learned, they decided that Mrs Snape´s potion had been too old for analysis as they couldn´t identify a mistake they had made.

-x-

As Easter had been in April, summer term was going to be short. The teachers tried to stuff as much information as possible into their lessons and homeworks were longer than ever before. Lily was glad they had studied potions in their Easter break. She wasn´t sure she could have handled the workload otherwise.

Near the end of May Remus Lupin rushed up to Lily on the way to breakfast. He pulled her behind a statue. "You must tell him I wasn´t in on that!" he panted.

Lily looked at the boy in bewilderment. "I have no idea what you´re talking about, Remus."

"I know and I can´t explain. But you have to tell Snape that I didn´t know and that I´m awfully sorry."

Lily´s heart went cold. "What did you do to Severus?" she asked anxiously.

"Nothing! I swear! You just give him my message!" cried the boy and off he was.

Lily was puzzled. Remus was going to see Severus himself in some minutes in potions. Why did he need a messenger?

She went on to the great hall where she tried to get a look at the Slytherin table immediately. Severus was already there. Did he look a bit paler than usually?

"Do you know what this is about?" Myra asked.

"What?" Lily was roused from her thoughts.

Myra pointed down the table where Black and Pettigrew sat on one side while Potter and Lupin sat at some distance on the other side. Potter and Lupin seemed furious.

The situation became more and more enigmatic.

-x-

"What happened?" Lily whispered as soon as they had started their assignment down in professor Slughorn´s dungeon classroom.

"Nothing!" Severus chopped nettles for the hay fever draught they were to brew.

"Nothing? So why are you pulverizing these nettles that way? Why are the marauders not talking to each other? And why does Lupin ask me to pass on messages to you?"

"What message?"

"I don´t understand it."

"Tell!"

"He was not in on it. He´s sorry. What does it mean?"

"Nothing!"

"Don´t lie to me!"

"Nothing. OUCH!" Severus had cut his finger. Lily began to use a healing charm without thinking. The wound was closed by the time professor Slughorn had hurried over to see what was wrong. The nettles were spilled with blood and couldn´t be used any more. Slughorn let them disappear with a wave of his wand, went to the cupboard to get new ones and settled down at their table to cut them.

"I´ll help you," he smiled, "or you won´t be able to finish the draught. That was bad luck with your finger, Severus!"

Severus nodded and thanked the professor for his help. Lily´d rather have talked to her friend. Somehow she got the impression that Severus welcomed Slughorn´s presence.

-x-

Lily and Myra had just set out for lunch when Lily heard angry voices. She thought she recognized Severus´s. So she gave Myra her bag and tiptoed back towards the voices. When she peeked around the corner she saw her friend and Potter.

"He can´t expect me to keep his secret when he´s stupid enough to involve Evans!" she heard Severus hiss. "You know her. She´s nosy. She won´t give up until she knows the truth!" Nosy? Lily bit her lip.

"Whom do you call nosy, Snape?" Potter fumed. "I thought you and Lily were friends! Why can´t you just accept Remus´ apology?"

"Our friendship is none of your business." Severus hissed back. "Tell Lupin I acknowledge he wasn´t in and tell him to stay away from Evans. If I ever see him near her I shall forget to stay quiet."

"He can´t stay away from her. They are in the same house."

"But some are close inside houses and some aren´t. You pass on my message."

Lily sighed. This was very puzzling. She had to find out what this was about. Then again... nosy?

-x-

June was filled with revising. Myra and Lily worked harder than ever and spent every free minute in the library. As a reward they did very well at the exams. Myra chose the last evening of the school year to deliver bad news.

"I did it," she beamed. "My results are good enough! I can go to Beauxbatons next year!"

"You can what?" Lily was hit by surprise.

"Go to Beauxbatons!" Myra beamed. "Dad has a job offer from the ambassady in Paris and the family moves to France. So Myles and I will go to Beauxbatons. They had no objections about Myles for he´s only fifth year. But they required certain marks from me to attend their final year." Myra chatted happily. "I will be able to spend weekends with my family. And with Pierre." She blushed.

"You´re leaving Hogwarts?" Lily was dumbfounded. "You can´t! You are my best friend!"

"I´ll write to you every week!" Myra promised.

"That´s not the same!"

"I thought we could meet in the holidays. And have a good bye week or so." Myra had lost some of her cheerfulness. "I can pick you up at home. I have passed my apparition test."

Nearly everyone had. Pettigrew and Lupin were the only Gryffindor students who were old enough but hadn´t. Lupin had been ill and Pettigrew had splinched once again.

"I´d love to spend a week with you," said Lily. "After Petunia´s wedding."


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22: The Wedding

It was a sad journey home. They had a good bye party for Myra in their compartment but nobody was in a party mood. When the train reached King´s Cross Lily and Myra hugged and Lily promised to send word whether her parents allowed her to spend a week with her friend.

When they crossed the barrier between platforms nine and ten a surprise waited for them. It was not Mr Evans who waited with a trolley for their trunks, but Vernon.

"Vernon!" Lily smiled. "What a pleasant surprise."

"Your father is busy. Get your trunks on the trolley."

Severus heaved both trunks on it. Vernon watched him. "Is there no way to make this easier?" he sneered.

"There is," panted the boy. "But you wouldn´t expect me to do magic here in public, would you?"

They, that is Severus and Lily, loaded the luggage into the boot of Vernon´s car. "Is it OK with you if we both sit in the back?" asked Lily. Vernon had no objections.

"Myra is moving to France," said Lily as soon as Vernon had started the engine.

"Oh no, you´ll really miss her, won´t you," Severus was commiserating.

"Your mother will need your help with cleaning the house," said Vernon.

"Yes. I thought so. It´s less than a week to the wedding. You must be very nervous, Vernon."

"Everything is well prepared," said Vernon. "There can´t go anything wrong, unless you two..."

"Unless we two what?" asked Severus.

"Spoil it." Vernon glanced into the rear-view mirror.

"Why would we do such a thing?" asked Lily.

"Don´t know what your kind does and doesn´t."

Severus frowned. They spent the rest of the ride in silence.

-x-

Lily´s anticipation that they were not invited to the wedding was not too far from truth. They were invited – Mr and Mrs Evans wouldn´t have had them to be not – but they were to remain in the background. "Best you´re not seen too much," Petunia said. "And make sure there are no owls around."

Petunia made them clean the house. ("Mum has to help me with the decorations.") First Lily wanted to protest but she remained silent when Severus gave her a wink.

As soon as Petunia had dragged the rest of the family to the garden, the boy waved his wand and the living room cleaned itself. Lily watched in amazement how things went to their proper place and dirt assembled in the dustbin.

"We´re free for the rest of the morning," said Severus. "Petunia wouldn´t want to know it was done by magic. I suggest we find ourselves a nice place and wait until she has the next assignment for us."

"Is there any special place you have in mind?"

"Your room? We could read."

"Read? This is our first day back from school!" Lily led the way upstairs.

"Not a textbook, one of your muggle stories perhaps."

"The Canterville Ghost?"

"Why not, there are some interesting recollections going with this..."

"There are no recollections going with this. You were snoring beside me. I couldn´t sleep."

"Did you? Poor girl!" Severus started looking for the book. "Got it!" he cried happily.

Lily sat on her bed. The boy shook his head. "No, I want to sit with you. And your dad will kill me. Come to the floor." He sat down and rested his back against the cupboard.

Lily joined her friend and moaned. "That´s not comfortable, you know."

"You can use me as a pillow," Severus offered. He extended his arm to make room for Lily. The girl rested herself against his chest. "This has to be uncomfortable for you now," she said. "I´m heavy."

"Not really," the boy answered. "But I have only one hand for the book now. You have to help."

Lily giggled. "Turning over the pages seems to be my longtime job."

"Holding you is much more pleasant than holding the torch in the dark."

"I hope so. Now start reading."

Severus read for more than two hours. Lily made him read the characters in different voices. They had a good laugh when the boy insisted the ghost was a soprano.

-x-

Fun ended when Mrs Evans entered the room. She was furious.

"This can´t be true! The whole family is on the edge of reason, Petunia is driving us all crazy. And you two sit here and do what? Read? At least I hope you were reading! Up and downstairs. We need your help."

Severus put the book aside and the two got up from the floor. "Sorry, Mrs Evans, we were having a break."

"Don´t tell stories, boy. The living room is clean but no cleaning device has left its place. You magicked that room clean and went to have fun hours ago."

"Sorry, mum."

"You clean the windows next. And for Petunia´s and my nerves´ sake, don´t use magic."

"OK, mum." – "Yes, Mrs Evans."

They went downstairs and Mrs Evans gave them cleaning rags and buckets. Cleaning the windows turned out to be dull.

"I really wish you could do that by magic." Lily sighed when she started the third window.

"So do I," answered Severus. He was standing on a ladder and cleaning the upper part of the window while Lily cleaned the lower part.

"Don´t chat, clean!" frowned Mrs Evans who tried to fix a garland on a bush outside the window. "And please, don´t let Petunia hear you talk about... you know."

-x-

After hours of cleaning the windows Lily was asked to prepare supper for the family. Severus was to help Vernon with the decorations.

Lily rushed to the window when she heard Petunia´s shriek. Vernon hung in midair and struggled with his feet. With his arms he tried to reach the branches of the appletree. Under him lay a ladder. Beside it stood Severus, who tried to point his wand at Vernon. Petunia shrieked and hit his wandarm. Mr and Mrs Evans moved towards the small group. Lily opened the window to hear what was going on.

"What´s this about?" asked Mr Evans. "Severus, let Vernon down."

"I´m trying, Sir, but I can´t aim as long as Petunia is hitting me." All the while he was talking, Severus tried to repulse Petunia with his free arm and without hurting her.

"Petunia, stop this."

"I won´t let him curse Vernon!"

"I won´t curse him, I´ll get him down!"

Mr Evans pulled his daughter away from his foster-son. "Get him down now!" Severus waved his wand. Vernon sank slowly to the ground.

"What did you put him up there for?" asked Mr Evans.

"It was by instinct. The ladder tipped over. I couldn´t let him fall from up there. I´d have taken him down immediately hadn´t Petunia attacked me. Are you OK, Vernon?"

Vernon panted and wiped sweat from his forehead. "Everything was alright with the ladder, don´t tell stories!"

"You were going to fall!"

"I was not!"

Mr Evans stepped between Vernon and Severus. "Stop it boys! I´ll help Vernon, Severus you go and help Lily!"

When Severus passed Petunia she jumped back with a shriek. "Booh!" Severus spat at her and stomped to the house.

-x-

"I swear he was going to fall!" Severus fumed in the kitchen. "I should have let him break his neck!"

"Severus! Don´t even think about it! You were right to catch him and I´m sure mum and dad believe you!"

The boy took a deep breath and tried to calm down. "What are you cooking?"

"Soup."

"You need help with opening the tins?"

"Severus Snape! This is not a camping trip! I´m cooking a decent meal with fresh ingredients and I´ve been working like a slave chopping all these vegetables!"

"Sorry, can I help?"

"No, I´m nearly finished. Thank you."

"There must be something I can do!"

"Like what?"

"Kiss the cook?"

"This might be helpful. Let´s try."

It was not helpful as Mrs Evans got a fit when she came to the kitchen five minutes later to see how Lily was doing with the cooking.

"I will not have that!" she shouted. "I can´t cope with one daughter edgy because of the wedding and needing to disentangle the other from embraces every five minutes."

"You make it sound like I was an octopus, Mrs Evans!"

"Don´t try to be funny, boy, I´m not in the mood for that! The two of you will help with the preparations. If you´re finished with your work you will come and ask what to do next. You will not find a hiding place to kiss. I have no time to go looking for you. Have I made myself clear?"

Both teenagers nodded. Mrs Evans hurried out to the garden where she was soon heard telling off Vernon for breaking twigs of the apple tree.

"We should slip her some calming potion," sighed Lily.

"We should." Severus agreed.

-x-

"Petunia has her dress already, of course" said Mrs Evans after Vernon had left. "Tomorrow we´re going to London to find something nice for the two of you. I hope we´ll be lucky to find something which doesn´t need fitting. They won´t do it in three days and we don´t have time for another trip to London anyway."

They got up early the next day and Mrs Evans took Lily and Severus to a big shop in London. They went to the men´s department first. Finding a suit for Severus turned out to be difficult. He was tall like an adult but too slim for most of the suits.

"No, take that off, dear," said Mrs Evans. "You must have," she turned to the shop assistant, "something in which he doesn´t look like we don´t feed him."

"Did you consider that he´d fit better into the kids´ department?" asked the assistant politely.

"Don´t be ridiculous. He´s too tall."

"I really can magic a suit a bit smaller at home, Mrs Evans," whispered Severus when the assistant had left to find something better for him.

"This is possibly the biggest store in London. They must have a suit that fits."

At last they found a black suit which was not too loose. "This looks nice," said Mrs Evans with a pleased smile. "Let´s go to the women´s department now. What color would you like, dear?"

"I think green or yellow would be fine. Don´t you think so, mum?"

"Green? That would go nicely with your eyes."

They went to the women´s department where Lily and her mother scanned the clothes racks for green dresses. At last they took some to the dressing room and Lily started to try them on. The first one was too loose and the second one had too many laces. Mrs Evans liked the third but Lily refused to get it because Severus shook his head.

The fourth dress was perfect. It was exactly the color of Lily´s eyes and its style reminded of witches robes. Mrs Evans liked it and Severus beamed at the girl. Lily turned in front of the mirror to view herself from all sides and finally agreed to take this dress.

Mrs Evans was pleased as they would be back early enough to help with the preparations at home. For Lily and Severus this was rather a sorrow.

-x-

Petunia´s wedding day was sunny but not too hot. The whole family was up early in the morning and Mrs Evans and Lily had to help Petunia with her dress. It was long and white with lots of ruffles. Mrs Evans helped the bride with arranging her hair into a bun and attaching a veil to it. Lily´s job was to hold and hand her the hairpins.

"You look so beautiful, Petunia!" the girl told her sister. "Vernon will be beside himself!"

"Thank you," Petunia answered and scrutinized her mirror image with a satisfied smile. "You look nice, too."

-x-

Nice was not the word Severus used when Lily came downstairs where he and Mr Evans were greeting the first guests.

"You look fabulous!" he whispered in Lily´s ear. "Did you meet Vernon´s sister Marge?" he added aloud.

"Not yet," Lily replied, "hello, Marge!" She shook the hand of a young woman who was clearly Vernon´s older sister.

"You must be Petunia´s sister," said Marge and nearly crushed Lily´s hand. "Vernon mentioned you were a red head. These are my parents." She pointed at an elderly woman who was as wide as her son and a tall man wearing a black moustache. The Dursleys were absorbed in a conversation with their son and Mr Evans. Lily heard words like ´loan´, ´extra bedroom´ and ´favorably situated´. "They are talking about houses again, Vernon has it down to two houses but it´s difficult to chose. Each has its advantages."

"I didn´t know they haven´t found a house yet. They started looking last year!" Lily replied.

"They will be living here for the first few months," said Marge. "Mum and dad offered them our summer-house for a start but your sister is afraid of the dogs."

"Dogs?"

"We have two bulldogs."

-x-

"Did you know that Vernon will move in after the wedding?" Lily asked Severus in a low voice later in the kitchen.

"You can´t be serious!"

"Marge told me. They will live here until they decided which house to buy."

"This will spoil our whole summer!"

"Maybe not! Mum may allow us to visit Myra just to get us out of the way."

"They won´t let us go on holiday together. They want to supervise us."

"They let us go to the moors alone when Petunia made too much of a fuss last year. We just have to choose the right moment to ask!"

-x-

They stayed in the background the whole day. There was a party after the ceremony. Lily would have liked to dance but Mrs Evans asked her and Severus to entertain the young crowd. There were five kids of about thirteen among the guests and Lily had to supervise them. One of the boys had brought a stack of cards and showed muggle magic tricks with them. Lily waited only for Petunia to spot this. Pandemonium was sure to break loose.

"Why don´t we go to the living room?" she suggested. "We´d be undisturbed."

So Lily spent most of her sister´s wedding in the living room watching card tricks and playing party games. Her only comfort was that Severus was with her though they had been introduced as brother and sister. So they couldn´t even hold hands.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23: Free

Vernon´s moving in brought all the problems Lily had foreseen. The atmosphere at the Evans´ home was soon very dense as Petunia and her husband eyed the magical folks suspiciously whenever they saw them. It seemed they waited for them to curse the family. Mrs Evans nerves were strained as meals were passed in painful silence.

Both, Mr and Mrs Evans, found it distressing to have to choose which young couple to talk to as there wouldn´t be a conversation involving all four of the young people.

"Mum," Lily said one morning while she dried the dishes after another tense breakfast, "Myra asked us to stay with her for some time. Is it OK, if we go? It would give you and dad a break."

"You´d stay with Myra´s family?"

"I will be honest. I´m not sure her parents will be there. But, mum, we spent times without supervision before. We don't need a chaperon. We proved that more than once."

"I´ll confer with your father. A break would be fine. But I´d really rather not have the two of you spend a holiday without an adult."

"Just give it a thought. It´s the only way to remove some of the tension in here I can think of."

-x-

It was Petunia who convinced Mrs Evans to grant permission to visit Myra. She dropped supper with a shrill shriek when she saw Severus point at a spider on the ceiling with a pencil.

"Don´t do that in here!" she shouted.

"Do what? I was solving a crossword!" Severus was bewildered.

"Pull yourself together, girl," sighed Mrs Evans. "I was after that spider and it nearly escaped. Your brother spotted it for me."

"He´s not my brother!" Petunia hissed and started picking up the debris of what had been a salad bowl before. "One freak in the family´s enough, no need to adopt another one."

"Petunia!"

Severus got up. "I´ll have supper at my house."

"Stay, dear. You have nothing to eat over there!"

"I have a wand, Mrs Evans, thank you. I´ll prepare myself a freak meal."

"I´ll come with you," said Lily. "You don´t have to eat alone." She followed Severus to the door. Behind her she could hear her mother shout.

-x-

Mr Evans came over to the Snape house an hour later.

"Your mother said you want to visit Myra. Where would you go?"

"I don´t know. I´d have to write to her and ask where to meet her."

"How long would you stay?"

"For how long do we have permission? Sorry, dad, please don´t misunderstand me, but staying here is no pleasure."

"Don´t misunderstand me, child," sighed Mr Evans, "having you here isn´t either." He hugged his daughter. "I want to know everything. Where are you going, who will be there, for how long will you stay. I´ll give you a ride."

"That´s kind Mr Evans," said Severus, "but I passed my apparition test this spring. I can get us there by magic."

"Is this safe?"

"Yes, Sir. No need to be worried."

"OK, then. You – what you call it – apparate. But I want to know all the rest."

"I´ll come with you, dad, and send D´Artagnan to Myra at once."

-x-

The owl came back the next day. It carried two letters. The first one was from Myra telling Lily that Myra would come to pick them up the very evening. The second was from Myra´s mother and reassured the Evans not to worry. The youngsters would be with her sister in law in southern France.

"I´m glad to hear you´ll stay with the Dupont family," said Mrs Evans. "I didn´t like the prospect of you two without supervision."

"So we may go?" Lily asked eagerly.

Mrs Evans sighed. "It will be best. I can´t stand the situation with Petunia and Vernon any longer. How long can you stay?"

"I´m not sure, mum," answered Lily. "We´ll have to ask Myra."

-x-

In the evening Lily and Severus waited nervously for Myra to turn up. Petunia and Vernon had decided to go out when they heared another witch was coming to the house. Mr and Mrs Evans used the remaining time to give advice to behave well and take care.

It was after ten in the evening when somebody knocked at the front door. Lily went to open and greeted her friend with a hug. "Hello, what a pleasant surprise!" she cried. Behind Myra stood Pierre.

Lily ushered them to the living room where Myra and Pierre were warmly welcomed by her parents.

"We know Myra, of course," said Mr Evans, "and you are...?" He looked questioningly at Pierre.

"Oh, pardonnez-moi, Monsieur. I´m awfully sorry, Sir. I´m Pierre de Bergerac, a friend of the Dupont family and a friend of Myra. Mrs Dupont asked me to come. She doesn´t want to have an inexperienced apparator take Lily to France."

"Is this dangerous?" asked Mr Evans. He looked at his daughter with concern.

"No, it´s not," Pierre reassured him. "But side by side apparition is more difficult than apparating alone and Mrs Dupont doesn´t want to take any risk with her young guest." Pierre smiled.

"Where exactly will you be going?" asked Mrs Evans.

"The Dupont summer residence. Lily spent some time there when she spent her year in France."

"How long will they be able to stay there?"

Lily crossed her fingers. "Aunt Rose says we can stay all summer if we like," Myra informed the Evans. "As there are some difficulties with Lily´s sister and her husband, I thought they could stay until the end of August and be back at the 28th or 29th to buy their school things. I´d love to spend the summer with my best friend. Losing Lily is the only thing which made me hesitate to go to Beauxbatons."

"The end of August? That´s a month!" cried Mr Evans. "Are you sure your aunt will agree?"

"Of course. She´s looking forward to having us there. And we won´t disturb her much. We can go on trips to see some of France and only return to the house in the evening."

At last Mr and Mrs Evans hugged Lily and Severus good bye. "We'll see you on the 28th of August!" said Mrs Evans and kissed her daughter's cheek.

"You are responsible for Lily," said Mr Evans and placed his hand on Severus´ shoulder. "You look after her. And remember our conversation!"

"I will, Sir." Severus said solemnly.

-x-

They went to the garden and Pierre offered his arm to Lily. "See you at the house!" he cried, turned on the spot and the next thing Lily knew was that the air was heavy with the smell of lavender. They were up on the hill near the Dupont summer house where years ago Lily had apparated with professor Dumbledore. Lily let go of Pierre´s arm and tried to take in the landscape. Even in the dark the fields seemed to glow violet.

A faint plop announced the arrival of Myra and Severus. As the boy didn´t know the place, Myra had taken him side by side.

"I thought far distance side by side apparition was not for the unexperienced?" Lily asked.

Myra giggled. "We just thought your parents would have less against our trip if they knew we took extra care of their little girl. Thanks for your help, dear." She kissed Pierre´s cheek.

"It was my pleasure," Pierre reassured her. "Shall we go?" He led the way down the hill to the house. Having reached the door he rummaged in his pocket and finally produced a key.

"Are the Duponts not here to let us in?" asked Lily.

"Nope," grinned Myra. "They are in Turkey. Uncle Aureus has to negotiate whatever he is negotiating with the Turkish ministry. Aunt Rose and the girls want to see an old Greek city. Don´t remeber which. Anyway, they won´t be back before the 20th. So we have this house for us four for three wonderful weeks."

"Myra, you´re a genius!" beamed Lily.

"You know that your dad will kill us if he ever finds out," interjected Severus.

"So we won´t tell him, love," grinned Lily and followed Pierre into the house. "Come!"

Severus stepped into the house behind Lily but Myra caught his arm. "Love? Have I missed something?" – "Maybe one or two things."

-x-

Myra went after Lily at once. "Love? And you have been keeping this secret from me? For how long?"

"Sorry, we couldn´t tell you. If anyone had guessed you´d have been in trouble, too."

"I´m supposed to be your best friend!"

"You are! I meant to protect you!"

"Protect me? Don´t be ridiculous!"

"Girls!" Pierre interfered. "Why don´t we sit down and have a nice glass of wine and a civilized conversation?"

He led the way to the patio where he magicked glasses and a jug of red wine out of thin air. He started to pour the glasses but then hesitated. "This will be better," he said and waved his wand. The wine had become orange juice in all but his own glasses.

"I started thinking you wanted to make me drunk," said Myra and accepted a glass with a smile. "Now, tell me. I want to know everything!" She looked at Lily demandingly.

"There´s not much to tell," said Lily. "We have been an item for two years now. Our relationship is not much different from yours and Pierre´s except that we have to keep it secret. You know, the whole Gryffindor and Slytherin thing."

"Two years!" Myra cried. "And you didn´t say one word. Who knows?" She looked hurt.

"Nobody. Well, my family."

"That´s why her dad´s going to kill us when he finds out we are alone here," said Severus. "I´m afraid he thinks I´m the most dangerous thing to happen to his daughter."

Myra giggled. "That´s about the thing my dad thinks about Pierre. He wouldn´t want to let us come in the beginning. But he complied when I told him Lily and her brother would come, too."

Lily laughed. "So my dad isn´t the only one who might get into a murderous mood!"

Pierre took a sip of his wine. "It seems we may have to flee together, Severus," he sighed, "though it will be easier on your part. You have to run from a muggle. He can´t apparate."

They laughed. As it was quite late they finished their drinks rather quickly and Pierre got up to show them their rooms.

"We can use the children´s rooms," he explained. "Myra and I took the ones on the front side of the house. You get those which have a view of the garden."

Lily´s room belonged to Angelique. Lily smiled. Some years ago she had spent hours in this room with Angelique and Myra. A part of her felt sorry that the Duponts were not there. She´d have liked to see Angelique.

Severus got the room beside Lily´s. It was Augustine´s and had fairy wallpapers. "Why do I always get the pink things?" he complained.

"It´s pink, but you´ll love the view." Pierre winked.

-x-

Lily woke before sunrise. The birds were singing before hiding from the day´s heat. It was a welcome change to the omnipresent crickets. She stepped out into the cool morning air on the balcony and enjoyed the scent of lavender which was more delicate in the early hours of the day than in the midday heat.

"Pierre was right," said Severus behind her, "I love the view." He stepped out of his room and joined Lily.

The girl smiled. "Did you ever see something that beautiful?" she asked and pointed at the lavender fields.

"Are we talking about the landscape?" Severus smiled.

"What did you think I was talking about?"

"Nothing particular," Severus smiled.

They stood on the balcony and enjoyed the morning until Myra waved at them from the garden. "Come down," she cried. "I´ve breakfast ready!"

-x-

They had breakfast on the patio. While eating they started making plans for the day. Severus wanted to see the perfume factories and how muggles destilled essential oils. Myra wanted to go to the beach and Pierre voted for a walk through the lavender fields.

"So the decision rests with you, Lily," said Myra.

Lily gave it a thought. "I´m for the beach," she said finally. "I really want to see the factories, too, but not on our first day here. Sorry, dear!"

They packed their bags and apparated to the beach of the Mediterranean Sea. Pierre found a place with no muggle tourists and put a spell on it to show stones and washed ashore rubbish to those who might turn up.

They enjoyed swimming and some games of frisbee and water polo. Lily was a bit annoyed that the others were able to use their wands (water polo becomes more interesting when you magically sprinkle water on the oponent´s face) and she wasn´t but Severus was very attentive. He even jinxed a big wave to hit his own partner, Pierre, when Lily cried she wished she could do it. Pierre spat salt water and the girls had fun watching their friends in a fun duel where the only thing to actually hit the oponent was water.

In the afternoon Myra and Pierre announced they were taking a rest behind some big rocks and disappeared out of view.

"I brought a book," said Severus. "Would you like to read it with me?"

Lily nodded. The lay side by side on their bellies and started reading. It was a story about a vampire. "Do you think there is any real background for this story?" the girl asked.

"I don´t know," said Severus. "But you don´t need to be afraid, I´ll protect you." He giggled.

"That's an easy promise, dear," Lily replied, "vampires are not likely to turn up here in the sunshine."

"But just in case, I promise to protect you!"

"That´s really kind of you!"

-x-

"Now look at you!" cried Myra when she finally left her hiding place behind the rocks closely followed by Pierre. "What do you bring your boyfriend for if he doesn´t put sun lotion on your back. You look like a tomato!"

Indeed, Lily´s back was very red, while her dark haired companions had gained a light brown color.

"This looks bad!" said Pierre, "we´d better brew you some cooling salve when we´re back! Why didn´t you cream her back?" he asked Severus. "Are you afraid of touching her?"

Severus blushed.

"Seemingly not," grinned Pierre. "Lets go home!"

-x-

When they reached the house, Myra and Severus went to the kitchen. Myra to prepare supper, Severus to brew Lily´s salve. Pierre stayed with the patient to entertain her.

"Myra explained to me why you have to keep your relationship secret," he said. "I´m glad we didn´t have houses at Beauxbatons. It seems to create enmity."

"Generally it doesn´t but it´s really bad between Gryffindor and Slytherin," Lily sighed. "I just wish we were in the same house. Things would be so much easier."

"Seems so. Your feelings for each other must be really strong if you can stand all this secrecy stuff."

Lily blushed. "It was sort of a game when we were younger and we are quite good at it by now."

"Myra says some boys from your own house gave you a hard time."

"They did but they stopped a year ago. They seem to have matured. It´s easier now though we have to be careful because of Severus´ housemates."

"Why´s that?"

"Slytherin house is kind of a pureblood club and I´m muggle born. He´d have a hard time."

"This is one complicated relationship the two of you have got!"

"I´ve got your salve," Severus entered the living room and showed a jar.

"That quick?" Lily asked. "I never thought it was possible to brew it in such a short time!"

"I hurried! I don't want you to suffer." Severus sat beside Lily. "Show me your back!"

"I´ll help Myra," said Pierre and set out for the kitchen.

"This may be a little cold," Severus warned and started massaging Lily´s back with the salve.

"It´s cool. That´s good."

"We can repeat that later if you need it," the boy offered and kissed Lily´s neck.

"If that´s part of the treatment, I´ll probably need more than one repetition!" Lily giggled.

"In that case I´ll have to make more salve. Which I will do with great pleasure as it´s for you."

Myra coughed at the door. "Shall we have supper outside?"

"Gladly! I´m as good as new!" Lily took her friend´s hand and led him to the patio.

-x-

Myra had prepared a delicious assortment of French cheeses and fresh baguette. Pierre had a glass of beaujolais, the others had orange juice again.

"You know these cheeses are really best if you enjoy them with a glass of this excellent red wine," Pierre pointed out.

"Can I try it?" asked Myra. Pierre offered her his glass. She took a sip. "That´s good," she agreed, "but I´m not used to alcohol. So I stick with orange juice."

Lily and Severus tried the wine as well but only Severus liked it.

"We can go and have a look at those factories you were interested in tomorrow," suggested Pierre. "Lily´d better stay out of sunshine."

The girls and Severus agreed. Pierre fetched some folders. "Have a look at those and decide what you want to see first," he said.

They made some plans for the next day and had fun discussing their waterpolo games. When they finally went upstairs it was well past midnight. Halfway up Lily rushed back down and fetched the salve jar.

"You promised me another treatment, doctor," she laughed.

-x-

The next day they apparated to Manosque, a small town, which held several perfume factories and a perfume museum. They had guided tours in all factories. Severus asked lots of questions. The guides were quite impressed by his understanding of essential oils.

The best was the museum. The old muggle tools were closer to what was used in potion brewing than the modern equipment of the factories. Severus even started to take notes.

After the visits they had a delicious meal at a small bistro. Lily especially liked a dish of roast duck with a sauce of peaches. Pierre promised to show her how to make it.

They went for a walk in the lavender fields in the Luberon region and returned to the house late.

-x-

Time passed quickly with days at the beach, walks in the fields and some sight-seeing. Pierre kept his promise and showed them how to cook some French dishes though he was no expert.

Sleeping arrangments had to be changed when the Dupont family arrived. Severus and Lily gave up their rooms for the Dupont girls. Severus moved in with Pierre, Lily with Myra.

Mrs Dupont insisted on taking her guests to Paris. They visited muggle sights as well as Ruelle des Secrets where Mrs Dupont spent quite an amount of her husband´s money (´He has no time to spend it anyway.´) on presents for the young folks. Among these were advanced Latin books and dark green silk robes for Lily and some very old leather bound second-hand potions books for Severus.

-x-

In the evening the girls retired to their room early. Angelique joined them and they had a long chat about the previous weeks. Lily had to retell the story how she and Severus had become an item and had kept it secret from Myra for two years.

"I knew this would happen," Angelique claimed. "From the first day I knew!"

"Don´t tell stories," giggled Myra. "You didn´t even know who we were talking about."

Angelique left for her own room well past midnight.

"Would you mind if I send Severus over? I´d really like to spend some minutes with Pierre in private." Myra asked.

Lily agreed and Myra stepped on the balcony. Two minutes later Severus came in.

"It seems I´ve lost my room," he said self-consciously.

"Come in! I´ll grant you sanctuary," Lily smiled.

The boy sat on the chair by the desk. "You had fun over here," he stated. "We heard you giggle."

"I didn´t see Angelique for two years. We had much to tell."

"I see."

"A pity you can´t sit on my bed. You could kiss me."

"Yes, a pity. I made a promise."

"You have to keep it."

"I have to. Care to meet me on the carpet?"

"You know, this is stupid. I can´t imagine dad prefer us kissing on the floor."

"Nor can I, but I never promissed to stay away from your carpet." The boy smiled.

Lily sighed. "I hope you do appreciate me putting up with this lack of comfort." She threw a pillow to the floor and sat on it.

-x-

The last week in France passed even quicker than the first three. Too soon Lily and Severus had to pack their bags and Severus took Lily back to England side by side. They apparated to the garden of his house in the early evening hours. Appearing out of thin air near Petunia or Vernon would not be helpful. They left their bags at the living room and took only the souvenirs they brought for the family to the Evans house.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24: Lost

The house was dark except for a light in the living room when Lily and Severus walked up the garden path. When Lily knocked at the door, Petunia opened. She was paler than usual and also a bit thinner. Lily had a bad feeling as soon as she saw her.

"Where have you been? Mum and dad died in that car crash two weeks ago and I had no idea how to contact you! I had to take care of the funeral and all, and if it wasn´t for Vernon I´d have had no help at all!" she hissed at Lily without preface.

Lily turned pale. "What did you say?" she whispered and tears filled her eyes.

"Mum and dad died. Two weeks ago. While you were amusing yourself god knows where."

"No!" Lily cried. She lost control completely. The bulbs of the lamps burst, a vase crashed on the floor and the newspapers, which had been lying behind the door, went flying.

Petunia shrieked and Vernon came from the living room to see what was wrong. "You stop that!" he shouted at Lily. "Stop that and get out of this house! Don´t you dare frighten my wife!" He pushed Lily, who was now sobbing.

Severus had his wand out in a second. "Don´t touch her!" he hissed. "I´ll repair everything when she calmed down!"

"We don´t need you to repair anything! Leave this house! You´re no longer welcome here!" Vernon shouted. He pushed Severus and then Lily.

He´d better not have done that, for Severus cast a spell and Vernon had to fight his own jacket which left the hall-stand and attacked him fiercly. Petunia now shrieked at the top of her lungs.

"Get your things, Lily," said Severus and the girl rushed upstairs, still sobbing.

"You two go to the living room." Severus pointed his wand at the door. "And shut up, Petunia."

Petunia shut her mouth and hurried to obey. She took Vernon´s arm and pulled him towards the living room. The jacket stayed behind and resumed its place on the hall-stand as soon as the door had closed on Vernon.

Severus sighed and went upstairs, where he found Lily throwing things into her Hogwarts trunk. Severus helped her and finally apparated the trunk to his house. Then he came back to get Lily.

"Is there anything left you want to take?" he asked. "Coming back might be unpleasant."

"I think I have everything, she can have the rest. Oh, wait! Not this." Lily took the book with the Canterville ghost story.

"Come downstairs. We have to say good-bye."

Lily nodded. "You better put your wand away or nothing we say will be heard."

Severus obeyed and they went to the living room. The boy waited for Lily to say something, but the girl started sobbing again at the sight of her sister, who was sitting beside her husband, her face rigid and her back straight as a statue´s.

"We are at my house in case you want to talk," Severus said at last. "Come, Lily." He led the girl out of the living room, out of her parent´s house to the street.

They walked to his house in silence.

-x-

Lily collapsed as soon as they were inside. She started sobbing uncontrolledly. Severus led her to the sofa and made her sit down. He sat beside her, his arm around her shoulder and stroked her hair. His own tears remained uncried.

Lily cried until she was exhausted. At last she disentangled from Severus´s embrace and wiped her face. Her eyes were red and her cheeks wet from tears.

"Are you better?" the boy asked.

"A bit, thank you."

"Are you hungry?"

"No. Only tired."

"I´ll prepare a room for you."

Severus went upstairs and returned after some minutes. "You can have my room," he said. "It´s more comfortable. I´ll take my parents´. Are you sure you don´t want a bite?"

"I just want to go to bed. Perhaps this was a bad dream and we are still in France when I wake up." Lily sniffed. She followed her friend upstairs with heavy steps and went to bed without changing into a night dress.

-x-

Lily couldn´t sleep. She turned from one side to the other restlessly. Never before in her life she had felt such a feeling of loss and loneliness. After what seemed like hours she got up and stepped out of her room. She didn´t turn on the light. She found her way to the other door in the dark and opened it cautiously.

"Lily?" Severus hadn´t slept either.

"Can I stay here? I´m so alone over there."

"Come." The boy said.

Lily walked to the bed with small steps in the dark. She curled beside her friend like a cat. Severus covered her with a part of his counterpane. He put his arm around her shoulder and soon Lily fell asleep.

-x-

When Lily woke the next morning, Severus wasn´t there. She went downstairs but couldn´t find him. On the kitchen table was a tray with coffee and muffins. In the cup was a piece of parchment saying that Severus would be back soon.

Lily thought about waiting for him to have breakfast together but having not eaten in the evening she was very hungry and there was only one cup. So Severus didn´t expect her to wait.

He came when she had just started her fourth muffin.

"Where were you that early?" Lily asked.

"Had a chat with Petunia."

"A chat with Petunia? About what?"

"Our Hogwarts letters. I thought about them last night and checked this morning whether they were in your trunk. They were not." He showed the letters. "And she gave me money for our school books."

"Petunia gave you money? What did you do? Actually curse her?"

"I told her we can´t go to school if we don´t have books." Severus grinned. "We´re both under age by muggle law. If we don´t go to school, she´ll be landed with us. That prospect opened her purse quite quickly."

"Extortionist! She could have sent us to the orphanage."

"Luckily Vernon wasn´t there. He´d have thought of that option."

"So we can go to Diagon Alley and get our books today."

"If you feel well enough."

"It will distract me."

"OK. Then we can go as soon as you´re ready."

-x-

They apparated to a quiet cul-de-sac near the leaky cauldron. Severus led the way through the pub to Diagon Alley. The street was crowded with witches and wizards taking their offspring to last minute shopping after returning from the summer holidays.

"Shall we separate and meet at the pub later?" asked Lily. "We´ll surely meet some housemates today."

Severus shook his head. "Let them see us," he said. "It´s so crowded, nobody will notice we are alone. They´ll think our parents took us here together and are somewhere in the crowd."

Lily bit her lip. "I wish they were," she whispered.

"So do I," the boy answered. "Let´s do the shopping quickly."

They went to the apothecary´s and to Flourish and Blott´s. Luckily they didn´t need new robes. They wouldn´t have been able to pay for them.

-x-

They were on their way back to the Leaky Cauldron when they ran into Potter and Black.

"Hello, Lily," Potter greeted friendly. "Snape." Black smiled at Lily and frowned at Severus but said nothing. "How was your summer?"

"Nice," said Lily. "I´m sorry but we´re really in a hurry." She tried to pass Potter and Black.

"Why don´t we have an ice-cream together?" Black suggested.

"Sorry, my parents are waiting," Lily lied.

"It won´t take long," said Potter. "You tell them the bookshop was crowded."

"You hear Lily, we are in a hurry." Severus said coldly. "We are already late."

Reluctantly Potter and Black stepped aside and let them pass.

-x-

After leaving their purchases at the house they went to the supermarket. Lily claimed to be not hungry again but Severus insisted on buying the ingredients for vegetable soup.

"I´d like to go to the graveyard. I have to see the grave to comprehend," said Lily on their way home.

"Can we go tomorrow?" Severus asked. "You are exhausted."

The girl nodded. "You are right. I´m tired."

"You have a nap when we come home, I´ll do the cooking," the boy suggested.

"No, that´s kind of you. I´ll help."

They prepared their meal in silence, each lost in their thoughts. Lily tried to read a bit after supper but she caught herself rereading the same line for the fifth time without taking in its meaning.

"I´ll go to bed," she said and went upstairs.

-x-

When Severus turned on the light in his bedroom an hour later, he found Lily there. She moaned and watched him sleepily.

"Sorry," Severus said. "I didn´t mean to wake you. I´ll take the other room."

"No, please. I don´t want to stay alone. That´s, if you don´t mind having me here."

"It´s OK. Move over."

Lily rested her head against her friend. Severus waved his wand to turn off the light.

"Are you aware that you´re my only family now?" Lily asked in the dark.

"I´m not. You have your sister."

"She won´t see me, she won´t talk to me. It´s like she´s not there."

"She´ll calm down. She´s as exhausted as you are. And Vernon isn´t really helpful. He´s joining her fears instead of backing her up."

-x-

Seeing the grave was overwhelming for Lily. She felt unable to move and tears wetted her face again. She was sure she´d never be able to stop crying.

Severus tried to convince her to go home but she shook her head. He waited patiently for her to calm down. At last the boy took her arm and apparated back to his backyard with her.

He led her to the living room where Lily sat the whole day. The only sound she made was blowing her nose from time to time.

-x-

"Happy birthday!" Severus wished Lily the next morning as soon as she woke up. "Up! I´ll magic you a birthday cake!"

"Can I have chocolate? Though I really don´t feel like celebrating."

"You can have chocolate. And bring your wand."

"My wand?"

"You´re of age now. You can do magic if you want to."

Lily sat bolt upright. "I can do magic at home!" She beamed. "I have to think about something special for my first charm."

-x-

When Lily came downstairs half an hour later, breakfast was ready. It consisted of chocolate cake and coffee and some little white flowers in a vase beside Lily´s cup.

"This looks great!" Lily smiled. She took a forkful of cake. "Mmh, and it´s delicious! Thank you!"

They had a discussion what Lily´s first spell should be over breakfast when suddenly D´Artagnan zoomed in through the open window, sending dishes flying. "Stupid bird! That was my cake!" Lily raged. She took the letter the owl was carrying and sent the bird off with a treat of birthday cake. "Look at that mess!" she started to pick up the pieces of her cup.

Severus hurried to help her. "Ouch!" he cried. Blood was dripping from a deep cut in his finger.

Lily started a healing charm at once. "Oh no," the boy cried. "You wasted your first charm!"

"Shut up," Lily grinned. "I wanted to use it for you anyway. I may as well repair your finger."

The letter turned out to be a birthday message from Myra.

-x-

They spent some hours packing their things for their last school year. Lily had to empty her trunk and sort things as she had thrown everything higgledy-piggledy into the trunk when she left her parents´ house.

"Look!" she cried and showed some muggle photos. "I took these in Crete. I had completely forgotten about them."

Severus examined the photos. "These are runes!" he said. "What do they say?"

"I don´t know! I took the photos to translate them later. But when I returned home a certain somebody distracted me."

"Are you speaking about me? How could I have done this?"

"I´m not sure. It was something like this." Lily smiled and kissed her boyfriend.

"I remember." Severus grinned.

-x-

"Are you aware," said Severus when they were having a break, "that, as we are both of age, we could elope and get married right away?"

"What a splendid idea!" Lily giggled. "We get married and I spend my honeymoon at Gryffindor tower missing my husband. No, no, dear. I want a wedding party in the garden with my friends to celebrate with me. And I want to wear a breathtaking dress for you."

"Can´t wait to see you in that dress." The boy blushed.

Lily kissed his cheek. "Can´t wait to wear it." She blushed too.

-x-

On September the 1st Severus apparated to King´s Cross with Lily´s trunk very early and put it in a luggage locker. Then he tried to find a place to apparate with Lily. Popping out of thin air with a trunk in a men´s toilet was alright but doing it with a girl in his arm would attract attention. If not the apparition itself, so the leaving the toilet. He chose a place behind the station building and went back to get his friend.

"Will you be OK on the train?" he asked when they entered the station. "I really don´t mind taking the train, too."

"No, dear. I´ll be OK. You apparate to Hogsmeade. We can´t be seen together on the train anyway."

"I can sit with you."

"No!" Lily cried. Some muggles craned their necks to see what was going on. "No," Lily repeated softer. "I´d spend my time at Hogwarts picturing who was giving you a hard time at Slytherin house. You apparate."

"Are you sure?"

"I´m very sure. I love you. Go now!"

"I love you, too. Have a pleasant journey!" The boy left the station to apparate back home while Lily fetched her trunk and set out for platform 9 ¾ .

-x-

Lily was one of the first students on the platform. She dragged her trunk to the end of the train where she knew the older students would sit. Being surrounded by cheerful kids was more than she could stand that day. She found herself a compartment and levitated her trunk into the rack. Then she sat by the window and stared out on the side averted from the platform.

Nobody seemed to want to sit with a seventh year so obviously not in a mood for a chat. Most students who were of age chose to apparate to Hogsmeade, so Lily wasn´t surprised that none of the girls turned up.

The train was well on its way through the suburbs of London when the compartment door slid open. Lily didn´t look who entered for she didn´t care. If she was lucky, the intruder would leave when ignored.

Someone sat beside her. Lily closed her eyes. Don´t look at them and they will go.

"Lily? Are you alright?" It was Potter.

Lily nodded without turning. There was a pause. Why didn´t he go?

"I don´t believe you. Something is wrong."

Lily bit her lip. Her eyes burnt with uncried tears. One ran down her cheek.

"I´m OK." Her voice belied her words.

"Are you crying?"

Lily shook her head. A handkerchief appeared in her view. Lily took it and blew her nose.

"Thank you."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No."

"One word from you..."

"Really, Potter, that´s a very kind offer. But no, thank you."

"It was James last year."

"Sorry, I really don´t feel like nursing your ego."

"Why are you sad? Has it to do with your Slytherin friend? Did he make you cry?"

Lily turned abruptly. "Why do you think he´s the reason for everything bad in my life? He never made me cry. And it´s none of your business, Potter!" The girl was furious.

"I´m sorry. I want to help and I tried to figure out what´s wrong."

Lily calmed down a bit. "You can´t help. I lost my parents recently." She resumed staring out of her window. The minutes stretched.

"I´m sorry."

"It´s not your fault. There´s nothing anyone can do."

"I´ll sit here, in case you want to talk."

They spent the rest of the journey in silence. Lily didn´t face Potter again.

When the engine pulled into Hogsmeade station, Potter opened the compartment door for Lily. She gave him a weak smile. "Thank you, James," she said.

-x-

James ushered Lily to one of the horseless coaches waiting for the students. When they boarded it, they were joined by Pettigrew and Lupin. The latter craned his neck before boarding as if he was looking for someone.

"Where have you been hiding?" asked Pettigrew happily. "Moony and I were waiting for you to play a game of gobstones." He started telling how he had won four games in a row against Lupin.

James glanced at Lily, who smiled forcedly. "Leave it, Wormtail," he said softly. "Lily doesn´t feel well, and you´d have to tell it again for Padfoot anyway."

Pettigrew looked hurt, but held his tongue. Lily stared out of the window.

-x-

At the feast Lily sat with Eloise and Kassandra. She soon wished she had chosen a different seat as both were very cheerful. Eloise´s parents had explored the uses of coconuts in potion brewing and the two girls had spent their summer on a Carribean island.

Lily thought nothing would be able to get her attention but she was wrong. The Sorting Hat´s song was different from the other years. First she didn´t notice, but the line "stand united in the light of friendship against those who lure to the dark" caught her attention. Never before had the hat sung about danger and threat.

She exchanged some signs with Severus reassuring him that she was fine. But truth to be told she could hardly wait to go to her dormitory and to bed.

After the feast the headmaster gave his usual speech and then advised the students to go to bed as lessons would start early the next day. Lily hurried towards the door.

"Miss Evans!" called professor McGonagall behind her. Lily turned and waited for the elderly witch who hurried after her. The professor took her arm gently and led her to the chamber where the first years used to wait for the sorting.

"Oh, Miss Evans," said professor McGonagall in a voice so much softer than her usual, rather harsh tone. "Professor Dumbledore informed me of the severe loss you suffered recently. As your head of house and teacher I share your grief. Please, don´t hesitate to ask if you need anything."

"Thank you, professor. That´s very kind of you. There´s nothing that can be done."

"Professor Dumbledore pointed out to me that you might want to see your brother in private. I understand it´s master Snape of Slytherin and you usually don´t meet in public. Which is too understandable seeing the rivalry between the houses."

"Thank you professor. But I´d rather avoid anyone finding out he was fostered by a muggle family. I´ll be OK."

Professor McGonagall gazed at Lily over the rims of her glasses. "Well then, Miss Evans, do go to bed. Please ask, if you need anything."

"Good night, professor. Thank you."


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25: Jealousy

The next couple of weeks James Potter devoted his life to guarding Lily. At least that was what the girl thought. He seemed to be everywhere she went, making sure she had what she needed at exactly the right time. Lily got the feeling he neglected his own friends to make sure she was well. One or two times she even thought Black frowned at her.

Some months earlier she wouldn´t have tolerated Potter's permanent presence but at her present state she had no objections. He was unobtrusive, tried to start conversations from time to time, but never insisted that she answered. He even took her moods with a smile.

He sat beside her in all classes and had she let him he´d have carried her bag all day. The only subject he had to stay away from Lily was potions where she still was teamed with Severus.

-x-

"I really don´t know why you do this for me," said Lily. "I´m awful to you." James had spent hours at the library to get books for Lily´s Runes essay. When he had returned, she had complained that he had forgotten one of the books on her list in a rather offensive way. James had put his own homework aside and returned to the library to get the forgotten book without complaint.

"Maybe I like you a bit," James smiled and handed Lily the book. "Is it OK if I write my own homework now?"

"Of course, do you need help?" Lily offered.

"No, thanks, you can´t help me with Divination anyway."

They sat by the fire in the Gryffindor common room and worked on their assignments in silence. After a while James´s friends joined them and the four boys discussed their homework in low voices.

Lily wasn´t sure whether it was due to the fact that the boys worked as a team or because Divination was easier than Runes but the four finished their essays a lot quicker than she would hers. Potter stayed behind whereas the others went up to their dormitory.

"There´s really no need you stay up, James," Lily said. "Go to bed."

"I don´t want you to sit here alone."

Lily had a look around. The common room was deserted except for the two of them. "That´s kind of you but unnecessary."

"If I go you´ll get lost in your thoughts and you´ll still be here in the morning without having finished your homework. I watched you. You always get lost in your thoughts."

"I have lots to think about."

"Want to share it? Perhaps an different point of view is helpful."

Lily shook her head. "There are things you don´t know. I´d rather leave it at that."

"I can keep a secret," James suggested. "You can´t handle everything on your own. You need at least someone to talk to. I know I´m not your first choice but other than your first choice I´m here."

Lily stared at James. "What are you talking about?" Did he know about Severus? Had Black finally broken his word? If he knew why had he been so protective? Shouldn´t he be jealous and angry? Hurt?

"Myra. Normally you´d discuss things with your best friend. But she´s not here."

Lily gave a sigh of relief. He didn´t know.

"So what´s bothering you?" James went on. "Is it still your parents? Don´t misunderstand me, but it´s been more than a month, you should feel better by now. At least a bit."

"You don´t know everything about my parents. I feel so guilty."

"Guilty?"

Lily hesitated. Voicing her sorrows might be helpful and relieving. But trusting James Potter with crucial information was risky. "You won´t talk about this to anyone, not even your friends?"

"I promise," James said solemnly.

Lily stared into the fire for a while. Where to begin? How much could she tell?

"I wasn´t at home when they died. I visited Myra in France. I was having fun while they died."

"You can´t stop having fun because somebody might die couldn´t know."

"I had lied to them. I made them believe we were staying with Myra´s aunt. But we weren´t."

"So you spent your holidays with Myra without her aunt. What´s the problem? I don´t understand."

"We were four."

"Four? You and Myra and who else?" James looked anxious.

"Pierre."

"The French boy who came to see Myra on Hogsmeade weekends?"

Lily nodded.

"So Myra had her boyfriend with her. And you?" James seemed close to panic.

"You swear you won´t tell."

"I swear."

"Severus."

"Him!" James jumped to his feet.

"Ssssh!" Lily grabbed the boys sleeve. "Sit down and stop shouting! He´s my brother."

"Your brother? You think I´m stupid? He can´t be your brother."

"Foster-brother." Lily admitted. "He´s been living with my family for more than four years."

James frowned.

"You promissed not to tell. He´d be in trouble if any Slytherin found out he was fostered by muggles." Lily reminded him.

"I will not tell," James renewed his promise. "So that´s why you never gave up your friendship. Why you never believed he was dangerous. I was so jealous of him." He grinned. "He´s your brother. Wow!"

Lily nodded. Having seen the look on James´s face when he assumed for one moment that Severus was more than a friend for her, she knew he mustn´t know more.

"I still don´t understand why you feel guilty. Myra´s aunt wasn´t there but you had your brother as a chaperone with you."

"That´s not the point. The last thing I told my parents was a lie." Tears were wetting Lily´s cheeks.

James offered a handkerchief. He seemed to have always one with him in case Lily needed it.

"I´ll finish this essay tomorrow," said Lily and collected her books. "Thank you for listening, James."

James Potter stayed in the common room until the fire went out. He had a lot to think about.

-x-

Lily regreted having told James about Severus the next morning. He had been there when she needed someone to talk to. He probably was going to keep his word to keep the secret, after having spent some time with him Lily was ready to admit that James Potter was a decent chap. Nevertheless she should have held her tongue. Severus was not James´s business. Moreover Lily was not sure how James would react to finding out that Severus was actually a rival. James had a crush, but Severus had the girl. This could be dangerous.

"You did what?" cried Severus. Never before had Lily been so relieved that they had cast a muffliato. "Are you crazy?"

"Stop shouting at me, please. And try to look casual. What good is a muffliato if your body language gives us away." Lily crushed garlic for the potion they were brewing. Another assignment for the hospital wing. The rest of the class were working on things like Felix Felicis or liquid Enthusiasm. One Ravenclaw student was even trying to brew Wisdom.

Severus went to the cupboard and returned with a tray full of ingredients. He sat down beside Lily. "You did what?" he repeated in a lower voice.

"I told him you are my brother."

"Great. What else did you inform him about? Our hiking tours? Our kissing? Our sleeping in the same bed? Where did you stop?"

Lily´s eyes swam with tears. "Stop that! You don´t know what it feels to be all on your own with noone to talk to."

"Yes, I have no idea. I´m the halfblood in Slytherin. How could I understand what it´s like to be isolated." Severus sounded bitter.

Lily added the garlic to the cauldron. She wiped a tear from her face with her sleeve.

"Stop crying, girl, you´ll spoil the potion!" Severus caught a tear with his hand just before it touched the potion´s surface.

"I have been an idiot," Lily sobbed. "Can you forgive me?"

"Of course I forgive you. If we weren´t in plain view of a crowded classroom I´d kiss you to prove it." Severus smiled. "And you were no idiot. You´re vulnerable and Potter took advantage. Please stop crying now. Slughorn will think I´m mistreating you."

Lily smiled. "We´ll tell him it´s the garlic."

"He won´t believe a word!" Severus pointed out. With a conspiring smile he wiped Lily´s tear from his hand with his robes. "I have something of you with me now. It´s a bit like being with you."

"I can´t persuade you to cry a little so that I can take a tear with me, too?" Lily asked.

"Slytherins don´t cry. It´s not compatible with our image. Sorry, love."

Lily giggled. They finished their potion in time. Slughorn praised their work. Severus knew that James knew and had forgiven her. Lily felt like she´d had some of the joy-potion Remus had been brewing.

-x-

The first Hogsmeade weekend of the year was scheduled for the last Saturday before Halloween. The older students were not surprised by the note on the board. The day was traditional. Lily and Severus had even appointed where and when to meet before the note was up.

Lily was doing her charms homework at the common room on Friday evening. James sat on the other side of the room with his friends. This had become rather unusual. Lily looked out for him without thinking. James seemed to be in trouble for the other three boys were talking to him urgently and Black was even pushing him. Lily thought whether she should go and ask if he needed help but then she saw the grin on James´s face. The boys were only teasing.

"Uhm, Lily?" It was James. Lily looked up from her book. "The boys just pointed out to me... Please don´t think I´m obtrusive...I just thought since we are on speaking terms now..."

"Come on, Prongs!" hissed Black from where he and the rest of the gang sat.

"Well, would you go to Hogsmeade with me?" James looked at Lily expectantly.

Lily gazed over to his friends. "Sit down," she said in a low voice. James took the chair beside hers. "No offence, James, but I can´t. I´m meeting Severus. I haven´t spoken to him more than three sentences since August."

James looked hurt, but only for a moment. "I forgot. You have to speak to him. Sorry I asked."

"It has nothing to do with you, you know that."

James nodded.

"What did she say?" Black stood beside James´s chair. "Where will you be going?" He looked from one face to the other. "Don´t tell me you turned his invitation down again, Evans."

"Leave it, Padfoot, it´s OK."

"It´s not! You´re making a fool of yourself for two months and she´ll not even have coffee with you. How cruel can you be, Evans?"

"I said leave it."

"Your judgement may be beclouded, but mine is not!" Black was angry. "She´s playing games with you! She´s making a fool of you! And you say ´Thank you´!"

"Don´t speak to Lily like that!" James got up to face his friend.

"Look at you!" shouted Black. Younger students were starting to watch with interest. "She´s trampling upon you and you defend her!"

"One more word and I´ll hit you!"

"Stop that!" Lily stepped between the two boys. "James, I don´t want you to altercate with your friends." She glared at Black. "Calm down!" She looked around. The whole room was watching. "James, would you like to meet me at the Three Broomsticks at four tomorrow?"

"Gladly!"

Black grinned. "Congrats, pal!" He patted James´s back. Remus and Pettigrew smiled.

"I really have to do this homework now or I´ll have to stay here tomorrow." Lily pointed out.

"Sorry," said James. "I didn´t mean to distract you from your work."

The boys went back to their own seats and the younger students resumed their homework and conversations.

Lily bit her lip. Severus wasn´t going to like that at all.

-x-

Lily didn´t expect James to follow her under his invisibility cloak nor to give it to Black. Nevertheless she used her anti invisibility charm when she entered the clearing. Severus was already waiting. He greeted her with a tight hug and a kiss.

"I´m also pleased to see you," laughed Lily. "Come, let´s sit down by that tree."

They went over to the oak hand in hand. Severus transfigured the moss into a soft cover and sat down. Lily sat beside him and rested her head against him.

"I haven´t felt this good in weeks," she purred.

"Nor have I," Severus smiled. "How are you doing at Gryffindor tower? Is Potter still after you?"

"I really don´t want to talk about Potter now. I´d rather be kissed."

Severus obliged.

They sat under their tree and enjoyed each other´s company. Lily told about Myra´s occasional letters saying she was doing well and meeting Pierre on weekends. Severus was glad Lily was feeling better.

"You know," said Lily, "I was feeling really bad because we´d lied to them. We spent our holiday without a chaperone against their wish. We made them think we were obeying, but we weren´t."

"I was feeling bad about that, too," admitted Severus. "They admitted me into their family. They trusted me and I lied to them."

"It´s comforting we didn´t do anything we wouldn´t have done with a chaperone."

Severus agreed. "So we obeyed after all."

They sat for a while in silence. Finally Lily stretched and kissed Severus. "I have to go, love. Thanks for this wonderful afternoon!"

"That early? We don´t have to be back at the castle before six o´clock!"

"We can´t go back together!" Lily helped her boyfriend up. "We never could!"

"I know! But there´s no need to go that early. You met Myra the last years but she´s not here."

"I know you won´t like that. I have to meet James. Potter."

Severus pulled away his hand from Lily´s. He looked hurt. "He´s James now, is he?"

"Let me explain!"

"What is there to explain?" Severus voice was cool all of a sudden. "My girlfriend leaves our first meeting in two months early to date another guy. James."

"I´m not dating him!"

"What do you call it when a boy and a girl meet at an appointed place at an appointed time?"

"I had no choice! Please let me explain!"

"Will you be kissing him?" Severus sounded bitter now.

"Will I...?" Lily struggled for words. Then she exploded. "How dare you! What are you suggesting? Am I that kind of girl? Leaving your arms to run to his? You are a toad! This is the worst thing anyone ever said to me!" She turned on the spot and stomped off to Hogsmeade.

"Lily!" she heard Severus call after her. "I didn´t mean to offend you. I´m sorry!"

Sorry! How could he! Never before in her life Lily had felt that furious and hurt at the same time.

-x-

Lily´s anger evaporated before she even reached the village. She had known that Severus wouldn´t like her meeting James. He was hurt and jealous. A part of her liked the idea that he was jealous. Should she go back? She´d be late for James if she did. The whole house knew that he had been asking her out for years and that she had finally agreed to meet him. Not to go out with him. To meet him. If she didn´t turn up he´d be a fool. She couldn´t do that to him, he had been a good friend the last two months.

Lily sighed. She´d signal Severus at supper. If he saw the ´I love you´-sign he´d understand that she had forgiven him.

She headed to the Three Broomsticks to meet James Potter.

-x-

James was already waiting at a small table near the window. He beamed at her when Lily sat down.

"I wasn´t sure you´d come," he admitted.

"I promised, so here I am," Lily smiled.

"Can I get you a drink? What would you like?"

"A cup of tea, please. I´m a bit cold."

James returned with two cups after some minutes.

"You were in the forest?" It was more a comment than a question.

Lily nodded. "We finally got to talk. It was good."

"I´m glad to hear that. I´m sure it made you feel better."

"It did." Lily hesitated. "Can I make one thing clear? This is not a date."

"It isn´t if you don´t want it to be."

"No, I´m just meeting a friend."

"OK."

Lily looked around. "You know this is ridiculous. We´re watched by at least fifteen Gryffindors. I feel like a zoo animal."

"Let´s go for a walk," suggested James. "We could go to Honeydukes or Zonko´s if you like."

Lily laughed. "That´s a good idea. I never saw one of the shops."

James stared at her in amazement. "How come? Oh, I see. The forest."

They drank their tea quickly and left the pub.

-x-

"Let´s go to Zonko´s," James suggested when they stepped out of the door. "We could get something funny for Halloween. That is if you feel like getting something funny."

"Why not. Let´s have a look."

The joke shop was fascinating. They rummaged through the racks of Halloween costumes and had fun trying on funny glasses and noses. Before they left James bought a nose for each of them.

"It´s late, we´d better go back," he said. "We can go to Honeydukes next time. If you agree to meet me again, that is."

"I´ll think about it." Lily laughed. Meet James again and have another row with Severus? Definitely not.

-x-

On their way back to the castle they met the rest of the marauders.

"Hi, Prongs!" Black greeted James cheerfully. "How was your date?"

James glanced at Lily. "We didn´t date, we met," he informed Black.

"Where´s the difference?"

"We met as friends. Like when you and I are meeting somewhere."

"I see. Anyway, I was at Honeydukes with the boys and made a fatal mistake. I bought my favorite chocolates but got marzipan instead of nougat. Those bloody boxes look so similar. I don´t like marzipan. Want it?" Black offered the box to Potter.

"I don´t like marzipan either. What about Moony and Wormtail?"

"I asked them before." Both nodded. "Evans, do you like marzipan?"

"Very much."

Black handed her the box. "Take it as a reward that you made Prongs happy," he grinned. "I hope you don´t mind I opened it. I only saw I had gotten the wrong thing when I ate the first."

"No problem," said Lily.

"What did you buy?" Black pointed at James´s bag.

"Noses." James took his out of the bag and put it on.

The boys laughed. Black reached into his pocket and put on a nose as well. Remus and Pettigrew did alike. Pettigrew´s nose was the same as Black´s.

"What about you, Evans?" Black laughed. "Got a nose, too?"

James held out the bag for Lily and she put on her nose, which was long and warty.

"You look like a witch," said Black.

"I am a witch, stupid." Lily giggled.

"Look at that girl!" Black cried dramatically. "I feed her with the finest chocolates and she calls me stupid!"

"The finest chocolates? You didn´t like them!"

"Because I don´t like marzipan. I´m sure they are delicious if you like marzipan. At least the nougat ones are."

Lily tried a bonbon. "You´re right. They are good."

"See. Though they are wasted on you. You look ugly and old with that nose."

"I don´t mind if Lily looks ugly and old," laughed James. "I can carry her when she´s too old to walk."

They wore their noses all way to the castle and made fun of each other. All five young Gryffindors were giggling on their way up the marble staircase. From behind a statue Severus watched how Lily accepted James´s arm to help her up the stairs.

-x-

At supper Lily looked out for her boyfriend. She had to make sure he knew that she was not angry any more. He didn´t turn up. Lily was concerned. Was anything wrong with him? Had there been trouble in Slytherin house? Was he injured or ill? She stayed at the great hall until the food was removed but Severus remained unseen.

When Lily returned to the common room, the marauders invited her to sit with them by the fireplace. Lily smiled and accepted the offer. Remus was just telling about his summer in Norway. He had been there with his parents and they had seen a pack of wolves in the Norwegian woods which the boys found rather amusing.

They stayed up until the fire went out.

-x-

Lily was the first in the great hall for breakfast. She didn´t eat much but kept glancing to the doors looking out for Severus.

He came late and he was not alone. Against his habit he came to breakfast in company. Black´s little brother. They were absorbed in conversation and Severus sat down without one glance at the Gryffindor table. For the first time in more than six years the boy chose a seat facing the wall.

Lily waited patiently. Perhaps he had no choice. He couldn´t risk Black to become aware of things. Black left after a while. Severus followed minutes later without looking at Lily.

-x-

Severus not only avoided looking at Lily at mealtimes but also speaking to her in lessons. Lily tried hard to get a quick word while filing into a classroom but it was like trying to catch smoke.

The girl become more desperate from day to day. Her only comfort was that he couldn´t avoid her in potions. She´d have her say there.

James noticed that something was wrong and tried to be helpful. Lily turned down his offers. When he wouldn´t give up she finally confessed she had a difference with her brother because of James and that being seen with him wouldn´t help. James restricted his protective behaviour to Gryffindor tower without being asked to.

-x-

"Why aren´t you talking to me?" Lily said as soon as Severus had joined her at their usual table in Slughorn´s classroom and a muffliato had been cast.

"What is there to say? You made your choice."

"I did what? He wants us to do what?" Lily looked at the blackboard. "A plague potion?" Lily´s amazement increased when she became aware that not only the two of them but also the rest of the class were to brew the plague healing draught. She payed attention to what the professor said.

"I want you to work carefully. We have the headmaster´s permission to take as much time for this as we need. The dark side is using deseases lately. The healers at St. Mungo´s can´t brew healing draughts as fast as they are needed!" Lily was taken aback. The dark side? The hat had mentioned something dark at the Sorting. What was the dark side?

Beside her Severus opened his potion book for the recipe. Lily leaned closer to have a look. "I get the herbs, you the creature parts," she suggested.

"OK."

They worked fast. Like always. Each knew in advance what the other would be doing next. Slughorn smiled at them when he passed their table. The dream team was at work.

"Will you talk to me now?" asked Lily when the potion bubbled merrily in their cauldron. "I´ve been trying to signal you for days."

"There´s nothing to say."

"Will you please explain to me what you´re talking about?"

"I saw you. You were holding hands with," he hesitated, "James!" Never had Lily heard so much contempt in one word.

"I was never holding hands with anyone but you." Lily was taken aback.

"Don´t lie to me. I saw you!"

"So you have vision problems. I swear I didn´t do a thing like that. I love you!"

"You have odd ways to show."

"You want me to kiss you? Here and now?"

"How very convenient for you to make our little secret public now," said Severus coolly. "I´d be occupied with fighting off half of Slytherin house and you could go on undisturbed with your little thing with James."

"I never knew you were so mean! How can you!" Lily´s eyes were swimming with tears.

"Ah yes, the crying stunt. I thought this would be next."

Lily jumped to her feet. "How dare you! Take that back!"

"Can´t stand the truth?"

Lily threw the first thing she could lay hands on. Marjoram, a little voice in her head said, when Severus dodged the jar and it shattered on the wall behind him.

"What has become of ´mind your body language´?" he sneered.

"Why are you doing this to me? You´re cruel!" Lily held back her tears with effort.

"Hear who´s talking!"

Lily grabbed another jar in cold fury. "No, no, girl!" Said professor Slughorn´s voice beside her. He lay his hand on her arm and forced the jar back to the table gently. "What a row! We´d better seperate you two fighting cocks! What a pity, though!" He took a look at the cauldron where a perfect healing draught was boiling down to the required consistency. "Lily you join your fellow Gryffindors, Severus you can finish this potion alone."

Lily frowned at Severus and packed her bag. Slowly she went over to the marauder´s table. James put his arm around her shoulder and whispered some words of comfort. Brilliant. This was surely going to solve the problem. Severus witnessing James whispering in her ear. What a day.

-x-

"Do you want me to talk to him?" James asked on the way to supper. "You had that row because of me. Maybe I can help sort it out."

Sweet James! Trying to make things up for his rival. He doesn´t know, Lily had to remind herself. "No," she said aloud, "it´d make things worse. He thinks I´m betraying his trust by talking to you. I don´t want him to think I let you fight my battles."

"So you don´t want to be seen at supper with me either."

"You can sit with me," sighed Lily. "He´s not stupid. He´ll know we are talking when he´s not watching. Better not let him think we´re hiding something."

"Like what?"

Lily blushed.

-x-

Having an unsolved difference with her boyfriend was hard for Lily. Severus was offended and refused to even look at her. So the girl prepared for a long week of waiting for another chance to talk. She became more edgy from day to day. Soon she was moody like back in September.

She tried hard to spare James her moods, but she had no objections to snap at Black. Of all people it was his fault that she had had a row with Severus. Hadn´t he made that scene, never would she have accepted James´s invitation. No matter how nice he was. Black had forced the situation on her.

"Here," Black laid a small box on Lily´s Charms book.

"What´s that?"

"A little token of peace."

"What?"

"Marzipan chocolates. We got along well when I fed you marzipan last week. So if I have to, I´ll buy you those every week." Black grinned. "I don´t want James to be in the middle of a battle between the two of us. If I have to sweeten your mood literally, I will."

Lily couldn´t but smile. "You´d do anything for James, wouldn´t you?"

"He´s my best friend." Black said solemnly. "You won´t need those every week, will you?" he added with a grin. "They are quite expensive."

"I won´t." Lily opened the box and held it out to Black. "Want one? As a token of peace?"

Black shuddered. "No offence, I don´t like that stuff."

-x-

Lily could hardly wait for the next potions lesson. As soon as she had taken her seat beside Severus she cast her muffliato. "We have to sort this out!" she whispered.

Severus didn´t answer. He stared at the blackboard as if his life depended on it.

"We haven´t come this far to lose each other because of something that stupid! Talk to me! Look at me!"

Severus turned to face her. "So it´s..."

"No, kids, that´s not a good idea," said professor Slughorn beside them. "We are working with dragon blood today. I won´t risk you throwing a vial of this, Lily. I suggest an exchange of partners." He looked around the classroom.

"Please, Sir," Black raised his hand. "May I work with Snape? I could do with some help."

"You really could," said Slughorn. "Lily, dear, change place with Sirius."

Lily packed her bag and went over to James´s desk. She glared at Black when she passed him.

"I´m sorry," whispered James.

"It´s not your fault," said Lily in a hoarse voice. Tears of disappointment burnt in her eyes.

"What will you do?" asked James.

"I don´t know. I really don´t know." Lily sighed and glanced over to Severus who was working with determination at the cauldron which had minutes ago been hers.

-x-

"How could you!" Lily shouted at Black on the way back to Gryffindor tower. "I work with Severus. You destroyed our team!"

Black stared at her. "Your team?" he said coldly. He glanced over to James who was walking on Lily´s other side.

Lily held her breath. She had nearly forgotten. Black knew. He was aware that she wasn´t fighting for her potions partner or her brother but her love. "Our team," she said in a softer voice. Don´t provoke him or he´ll tell.

"You destroyed your team when you threw that jar last week." Black´s voice was back to normal. "I did you a favor today. I gave you my partner. Merlin knows who Slughorn had teamed you up with. I thought you´d be glad to get someone you like. I have to work with Snape now. It´s no fun I can tell you."

"It´s fun for me."

"I´m not you."

"That, Padfoot," interjected James, "could be your problem."

-x-

Lily lay awake all night. What could she do? In the early morning she got up and took a piece of fresh parchment out of her bag. A letter. It was the only way she could think of. But how to put things? She had to be careful. She didn´t know who would be there when Severus got the letter. She had to find a way to communicate matters which only Severus understood.

She lit her wand and chewed her quill. After more than half an hour hard work, she finished her message.

Dear Severus, it said. I´m writing to you because I can´t wait for our next meeting. A lot has happened in my life recently. I got an offer and turned it down for what must have been the hundreth time. The person I had trouble with before made it a public case and I had to accept. It´s a mess. I had to do what I didn´t want and even lost what I want because I had no chance to explain.

Now I´m sitting here alone, eating sweets (she helped herself to a piece of marzipan) and stiring my coffee.

What am I to do?

She signed the letter with a drawing of a little flower.

After rereading it carefully she put on her robes and tiptoed out of the dormitory to the owlery.

-x-

Lily was so upset by the prospect of finally contacting Severus and making things up that she only realized when she stepped into the owlery that she had not put on her shoes. The stone floor of the paneless room was icy.

D´Artagnan hooted at her sight and came down to her obediently. He sat on her shoulder nd held his leg out to attach the letter.

Lily stroked the owl´s soft feathers. "I can´t use you, dear," she explained. "You´d give away my secret." The bird hooted with relief and went back up to one of the wall niches.

Lily chose one of the school owls, a plain unconspicuous bird. "You wait until breakfast," she instructed the owl. "Then you deliver it."

Cautiously she tiptoed back towards Gryffindor tower. It was too late to go back all the way to her dormitory for the first students were on their way to breakfast.

"Where have you been?" It was James who spotted her.

"On a walk."

"Without shoes?"

"Forgot them."

"You forgot them? Wow. You must have been quite distracted."

Lily didn´t answer.

"Did you meet your brother? Did you sort things out?"

"We didn´t meet."

"So where were you? You can tell me. I´ll keep it secret if you wish." James smiled. A warm and comforting smile. It was easy to confide in him.

"I wrote him a letter," said Lily.

"Don´t tell me you went to the owlery without shoes! It´s cold up there!"

Lily smiled. "Cold feet are pretty low on my priority list right now."

"They are not on mine," James pointed out. "Do you want me to carry you?"

Lily´s eyes widened. "No," she laughed. "First, aren´t you a bit dramatic? And second, no offence meant, James, but I´d rather lose some toes than be seen carried by you."

James sighed theatrically. "Oh, this woman!" he cried and pressed his wrist against his forehead. "I offer to kiss her feet and she turns me down!"

"You didn´t offer to kiss my feet, stupid," Lily giggled. "And to put things straight: there´s no single part of me you can kiss!"

"Oh no!" James moaned. "My hopes are smashed." – "I know," he added suddenly earnest, "that there´s no part of you to be kissed by me. But if being your friend is the best I can get, I´ll be satisfied with that."

"I know," said Lily equally earnest. "Let´s go to breakfast. I´m starving." She took James´s hand and dragged him after her. The boy didn´t protest.

-x-

"Lily," James called when they reached the first floor. "As much as I´m enjoying this, it won´t help if he sees us enter the great hall hand in hand."

Lily stared at their hands for a moment as if she was only realizing then that they were linked. She blinked. "You´re right. It won´t help."

They let go of each other and continued downstairs.

-x-

At breakfast Lily glanced over to the Slytherin table what must have been every two minutes. Severus arrived late in the company of Black´s little brother. Again he sat turning his back at Lily.

"I thought you were hungry," said James beside her. "You have barely touched anything."

"I´m not as hungry as I thought I was." Lily glanced over to the Slytherin table again.

"Stop that! It´s too early for the owls. And they won´t come any sooner if you stay hungry." James started shoveling scrambled eggs on Lily´s plate. "Tea of coffee?" he asked.

"Coffee, please."

James handed her a cup. "Lily," he leaned closer and whispered in a low voice, "if you keep staring at him that way you can as well go over and fall on his neck. You have to be more careful!"

Lily concentrated on her food. Now that she had started eating, she realized how hungry she really was. She even didn´t see the owls arriving and only looked when James nudged her softly. She glanced over to Severus in time to see him shove her letter in his pocket without a second glance.

"Why doesn´t he read it?" she whispered.

"He can´t. He´s in company," James pointed out. "He did recognize your handwriting, I assume?"

"Of course."

"So he can´t risk a fellow Slytherin to see what´s in the letter." James said in a comforting voice.

"I hope he hurries," sighed Lily. "I can´t stand this much longer."

-x-

Lily never learnt whether Severus had read the letter and when. His behaviour didn´t change and she had no idea whether that was because he hadn´t read the letter or because he didn´t believe her.

The girl tried to think of a way to talk to her friend but she couldn´t come up with anything. For some minutes she thought she´d sort things out over the Christmas holidays. He couldn´t after all avoid her for two weeks at home, but then she remembered there wasn´t a place called home any more. She couldn´t go to her parents´ house for Petunia didn´t want her there. On second thought she couldn´t even be sure Petunia hadn´t sold the house. The only other place was Severus´s house. He´d be there. But the way he was behaving right now she wasn´t sure he would let her in.

Lily sighed. She´d have to stay at school for the holidays. She went to bed without supper and cried herself to sleep.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26: An Act of Friendship

December came with icy cold and snow storms. Lily didn´t notice. All her thoughts were absorbed in finding a way to turn things right with Severus. She tried to corner him somewhere in the castle but he barely seemed to leave Slytherin house. Didn´t he need library books any more?

When the list for the Christmas holidays was put up in the common room, Lily signed up immediately. There was no use denying it. She had no place where she was wanted for the holidays.

Two days later James sat beside her by the fire. He was holding what looked like a letter.

"You don´t really want to stay here for the holidays with the teachers and some little kids, do you?" he asked.

"I have no choice," sighed Lily. "My sister won´t take me and Severus is not likely to let me into his house."

James blinked. "You have a sister and Snape has a house? Wow, that´s quite a lot of information for a side remark."

"Petunia despises magic and therefore me. As does her husband. I´m no longer wanted there. And Severus inherited his parents´ house. It´s small but nice. We stayed there last summer after Petunia and Vernon cast us out."

"You stayed at Snape´s place with him?" James sounded suspicious.

"Where was I to go? And we used the house before when the situation with Petunia was unbearably tense. I assume you didn´t come here to discuss my residence arrangements." Lily tried to change topic quickly.

"In fact I did," replied James. "I had to ask my parents first." He fanned with the letter. "They gave me permission to bring a friend for the holidays. So, do you want to come?"

"It will make matters worse with Severus."

"It won´t make them better if you stay here and are unhappy."

"You´re right. I´d like to stay with your family. Thanks for inviting me. But," Lily said solemnly, "I´m only staying as a friend."

"Of course!" James looked scandalized.

-x-

Lily got fresh hope two days before the holidays started. Professor Slughorn sent an invitation to his annual Christmas party. Severus would be there. If she was clever she could get a chance to speak to her boyfriend – is he still your boyfriend? The tiny voice in her head asked – and sort things out. She even started thinking of how to explain to James she wouldn´t come.

Slughorn used one of the storerooms for his party as usual. The decorations were christmassy, with lots of tinsel and icicles. In the middle of the room a large mistletoe decorated with red ribbons dangled from the ceiling. "Whatever you do," Lily told herself when she entered the room, "don´t end up in that trap with a boy. Neither Severus nor James."

"Would you like a drink?" asked James beside her.

"No, thank you. That´s very kind of you, but I´ll get me something myself."

James looked over to the bar where Severus was standing. "Good luck!" he smiled.

Lily went over and got herself a glass of pumpkin juice. The room started to fill with guests. Some older people were among them. Lily smiled. Professor Slughorn was known to introduce his students to former members of his little ´club´. This seemed to be one of these contact making parties.

She stepped aside to make room for other guests at the bar. As she had planned it, she ended up beside Severus.

"We have to talk."

"Have we?"

"Did you get my letter?"

"Yes."

"Did you read it?"

"Yes."

"So?"

Severus finally turned to face her. "What do you mean by ´so?´?" he asked. "So maybe you were forced to accept the invitation, but why didn´t you tell me at once? And why did I see you hold hands with him later? And why is he whispering into your ear?"

"Because I missed you and didn´t want to waste a minute I had with you? I didn´t. He wants to keep a certain secret."

"You still deny it? Although I saw you?"

"I don´t deny anything! There´s nothing to be denied!"

"Your lie doesn´t become credible if you repeat it." Severus´s voice was as cold as ice.

"What do you want me to do? Confess a crime I never commited? Would it make you feel better if you could act generous and forgive me?" Lily hissed in a low voice. "If that´s required to get you back I will."

"I want you to be honest!"

"Honesty seems to drive us apart."

They kept their voices low but their body language must have given them away. "Now, now, children!" Professor Slughorn droned. "This is a Christmas party! We don´t want a quarrel here! Did any of you meet Lucius Malfoy?" He introduced a pale man with long blonde hair in his midtwenties. Malfoy inclined his head in salute. "Lucius, meet my two top potion brewers, Severus Snape of Slytherin and Lily Evans of Gryffindor."

Severus and Lily greeted the young man politely. Professor Slughorn went on about their extraordinary abilities – "very rarely found, especially in a muggle-born." The professor nodded at Lily.

"Indeed," Lucius Malfoy agreed. "Potion brewing is a complex art. Only few coming from nonmagical families understand it." Lily couldn´t help but notice that his voice had become a touch colder. Soon she had to admit that she was no longer part of the conversation.

"Excuse me," she said politely. "Severus." She nodded at him and signalled to meet her at the trophy room.

She went back to the bar to get another glass of juice.

"Hi, did it go well?" James had just chosen a cup of punch.

"Not really. Slughorn interrupted before we got anywhere."

"I´m sorry to hear that. Did you try any of the food?"

James led the way to the buffet. They had only walked some steps when they were stopped by Black´s cheerful cry. "Whoop! Finally someone under that mistletoe!" He applauded. People started staring.

Lily cursed under her breath. She had forgotten the bloody mistletoe! She tried to flee to the buffet quickly but professor Slughorn wouldn´t let her. "Customs have to be observed, dears," he beamed. Lily could tell she was blushing. As was James. Reluctantly they turned to each other and kissed, their lips barely touching.

"Oh, come on," cried Black, "what are you afraid of? The worst that can happen is that you like it." People laughed. Lily was close to tears.

James pulled her closer and pressed his lips on hers. Lily let it happen as she had no idea how to escape. The guests applauded. Lily shoved her glass in James´s hand, frowned at him and left the room at a run.

She went straight up to the trophy room. "Please, let him come!" She leaned against the glass cabinet where she had sat years earlier when her gran had died. Nobody came to comfort her this time.

-x-

James waited for her at the common room when Lily came back hours after curfew. As Slughorn´s Christmas parties were known to last late and she was on the guest list nobody questioned her being outside Gryffindor tower at that time of the night.

Lily tried to pass James without a glance but he wouldn´t let her.

"Please!" he cried and rushed after her to grab her sleeve before she could go up to the girls dormitory. "I´m very sorry! Oh my god, look at you!" The boy rummaged in his pocket and offered her a handkerchief.

"How could you do that?" Lily asked accusingly. She could hardly restrain from shouting at James.

"What? Did you have a better idea? We were trapped. I thought better get over it quickly."

"Don´t act the innocent!" Lily fumed.

"What are you talking about?"

"I´m talking about you manoeuvering me under that mistletoe." The girl said coldly. "You knew I was trying to make it up with Severus and how he´d react. But you couldn´t resist the opportunity! You toad!"

James paled. "I swear I didn´t any such thing! I know you don´t want to kiss me. Do you really think I´m that shabby?"

"Honestly, James, I don´t know." Lily turned on the spot and went to her dormitory.

-x-

Lily stayed in bed late the next day. She heard the other girls get ready to go home but she pretended to be still asleep and nobody tried to wake her as they assumed she had come back late from professor Slughorn´s party.

It was lunchtime when she came down to the common room.

"Finally!" cried James. "We are waiting for you!"

"What?"

"Where is your bag? We were supposed to arive at my parents´ two hours ago!"

"You´re still going to take me to your parents´ house?"

"If you still want to go. I hope you changed your mind about me being a toad."

Lily nodded. "I´m sorry. It was easier to accuse you than admit I hadn´t paid attention. After all, I knew that mistletoe was there."

"OK, so then where´s your bag?"

"I´ll be ready in a minute!" Lily rushed back upstairs and threw some clothes in her bag.

"Here I am," she cried when she came back.

"Anyone tell me that women are slow packers." Black grinned.

Lily frowned. "I take it you´ve not invited only one friend."

James smiled. "Sorry, I forgot to mention. Sirius spends all holidays at my parents´."

-x-

"You haven´t taken your apparition test, have you?" asked James on their way down to the gates.

"No," Lily answered. "I turned seventeen at the end of August. There hasn´t been a chance for the test since then. But I think there will be in February."

"So I´ll take you side by side. Sirius, can you take the bags?"

"OK, pal. I take the bags, you take the lady." Black agreed cheerfully.

As soon as they had passed the gates James put his arm around Lily´s shoulder and turned. Lily felt the meanwhile familiar squeeze behind her navel.

-x-

The Potters´ home was rather a villa than a house. It was surrounded by huge old trees and you had to pass a tree-lined walk to get to the door. The lawns were covered with snow and the house itself was decorated with garlands of lights. On the front lawn stood a big Father Christmas. Lily smiled. It wasn´t what she had a wizard home expected to be like but it looked very inviting.

James led the way to the door. He had not even raised his arm to knock when an elderly woman, rather small and plump with graying hair, opened.

"Jamie, my boy! I was so worried! You are late!" she exclaimed, dragged her son into a hug and kissed his cheeks. "Hello Sirius, dear!" she greeted Black.

"Sorry mum," James apologized, "we didn´t mean to worry you."

"The lady took her time," grinned Black and hugged Mrs Potter. "I hope you´re well, Mrs P."

"I overslept, sorry," said Lily hoping that none of the boys would tell the true reason for their lateness. "I´m Lily Evans. Thank you for having me here."

"Never mind, dear," beamed Mrs Potter and hugged Lily as well. "You´re here now and no harm done. Come in! Lunch is ready. Harold! Jamie is here!" She cried in the hall.

James left his bag on the floor beside the door and followed his mother. As Black did alike, Lily followed the lead.

Mr Potter greeted them in the dining room. He must have looked exactly like James when he was younger. He had the same build, hair and hazel eyes. He even wore the same glasses. The only difference were lots of wrinkles in his face and some silver strands. Lily would have guessed him to be James´s grandfather rather than father.

"Jamie! Welcome home!" he cried cheerfully. He hugged his son and shook hands with Sirius and Lily.

Mrs Potter served lunch, which consisted of pizza and a chocolate pudding. They all ate with a good appetite. James and his parents chatted happily about school. From time to time Black and Lily were included into the conversation with questions but both gave only short answers not wanting to intrude on the Potter family´s reunion too much.

After the meal Mrs Potter got up and offered Lily to show her her room which the girl gladly accepted. She followed the woman upstairs with her bag and was led to a beautiful room with furniture made of what must be cherry wood. The bed was a fourposter with blue curtains. The only room comparable to this Lily had ever seen was her room at Beauxbatons academy.

"Jamie said you lost your family recently, dear," said Mrs Potter.

"Yes, my parents died last August."

"I´m so sorry to hear. My husband and I are dreading the day when we´ll have to leave Jamie."

Lily wasn´t sure what to say.

"But hopefully," Mrs Potter continued, "we´ll have some years before our time comes. No need to be upset, dear. That´s the way things are meant to be. We grow old and then we die. There´s no reason to be afraid."

Lily bit her lip. Her parents hadn´t grown old.

"Yes," said Mrs Potter and patted Lily´s shoulder. "It´s hardest for those we leave behind."

-x-

It was good to stay with a family even if it was not her own. Lily enjoyed the common meals, the chats and the fact that someone cared for her. She spent a lot of time outside with James and Black. They had some fierce snowball fights. James sided with Lily in the beginning and the two of them covered Black in snow but Lily wouldn´t always let him do it. She insisted to change alliances that each of them had to fight the other two alone in turn.

"You think I can´t handle you two?" she cried when James refused a battle two boys on one girl. She waved her wand and both boys were hit by snowballs. Soon they had to admit that Lily was the best snowball fighter among them. No wonder after hours of duelling lessons with Severus, thought Lily. Her heart ached at the thought.

"Got you!" cried Black and hit her with a snowball using her moment of absent-mindedness. Lily spat snow. "You wait!" she cried and went after Black with a series of hexes. Black dodged her attacks. Lily persued him and drove him towards the trees patiently. At last she raised her wand and shook the branches of the tree under which Black was standing. He was burried under a load of snow and James had to help him out.

"I never thought I´d live to see you find your equal," James laughed and offered his friend a hand to drag him out of the snow.

Black laughed and coughed at the same time. "There is a marauder in you, Evans! Be ready for revenge!"

Lily held out her wand in duelling position. Black was just getting ready when Mrs Potter called them to tea and revenge had to be postponed.

-x-

Christmas itself was pleasant and sad. Pleasant because the Potters had a beautiful Christmas tree they decorated together the muggle way. Sad because it was Lily´s first without her family.

Mrs Potter cooked a delicious Christmas dinner without magic and gladly accepted Lily´s help.

"I prefer doing some things the muggle way," she explained in the kitchen. "That way you work slower and can enjoy it longer."

"My parents were muggles," said Lily. "We did everything the muggle way at home."

"Lucky you," cried Mrs Potter. "This must have been fun! Though not when it comes to cleaning, I suppose."

"Cleaning is not that bad. Though I´ll admit there are more joyfull tasks."

After dinner, during which Mrs Potter kept praising Lily´s cooking abilities, presents were exchanged. Lily got a beautiful cashmere scarf from the Potters and a box of marzipan sweets from Black. James´s present was in a small box and he beamed at her when she got ready to open it. The box contained a green silk ribbon which was attached to what was clearly a small silver twig of mistletoe. It was supposed to be worn as a necklace.

Lily blushed.

"Sorry," grinned James. "I couldn´t resist that opportunity."

The others moved closer to get a better view of the present. "This is beautiful," Mrs Potter exclaimed. "May I have a closer look?" asked Black. Lily held out the box for him. Black took the ribbon and held it up as if to examine the present. "Ooops!" he grinned. "Look who´s sitting under a mistletoe!"

Lily and James both frowned at him.

"You heard professor Slughorn," Black went on, "customs have to be observed."

"You know, son," added Mr Potter, "the professor is right."

James looked at Lily apologetically before he kissed her. "Give that back, Black," Lily growled, "before you get the idea that I should kiss you as well."

-x-

They stayed up late eating Mrs Potter´s delicious Christmas cookies, singing Christmas carols and laughing at Mr Potter´s tales of young Jamie looking for Father Christmas at the age of five. (Actually James was not laughing but blushing.)

Lily hadn´t felt that happy and relaxed in months. When she finally retired to her room she was humming her favorite carol, ´Silent Night´. "Come," she cried happily when there was a soft knock at her door. James entered and closed the door cautiously behind him.

"I want to apologize," he said.

"What for?"

"I kissed you again. You don´t shout at me?"

"It wasn´t your fault. Black made you. Again, by the way."

"What?"

"I gave it a though. Nobody would have noticed us walking under that mistletoe at Slughorn´s party. But Black."

"So you don´t think I was in on that."

"No, luring me under a mistletoe is not your style. It´s Black´s."

"His name is Sirius, you know."

"He´s Black for me."

"I wish you were friends, too. I´ll go now. Just wanted to make sure you didn´t blame me for that kiss."

"James," Lily smiled. "There´s nothing to blame you for. That wasn´t really a kiss."

"What do you mean by that?"

"That is really a kiss." Lily demonstrated. James was a quick learner.

-x-

Lily lay awake for quite some time that night. A part of her had enjoyed kissing James. An other part was scolding herself for being unfaithful. She must have been mental. What about Severus? And why did she kiss a boy she didn´t want. It would break his heart when he learnt that there was no chance for a relationship for the two of them. But then again was there not? Kissing James was pleasant and exciting. His embrace was tender and strong at the same time. And he undoubtedly loved her. On the other hand kissing Severus was equally pleasant and he had been her boyfriend for more than two years. Running to James because of a row was shabby. Oh Lily, stupid girl, why can´t you enjoy a pleasant week in a friendly family without getting into confusion?

When she finally fell asleep it was not restful. James and Severus were haunting her dreams. One was telling her off for playing games with him. The other for infidelity. "I´ve been right all along!" Severus said in a cold voice.

-x-

"Is there a reason the two of you can´t look at each other without blushing?" Black asked casually when they went for a walk after breakfast the next day.

"No. Not that I know of," said James. "Why would anyone be blushing?"

"That´s the question. You´re doing it again by the way, Prongs."

James sighed. "You´re nosy, do you know? But as I know you won´t give up, I´ll tell you. We kissed yesterday." Lily could have killed him. Great. Tell Black. That makes things easier for me.

"I saw," Black was bewildered. "What´s there to blush?"

James grinned. Black looked from him to Lily and back. At last he whistled.

"I didn´t see. Congrats, pal! And congrats to you, too, Evans. I´m glad you´ve finally come to your senses."

-x-

James came to Lily´s room on tiptoe in the evening.

"We need to talk," he stated.

"We do," Lily agreed.

"I have to know before we go back to Hogwarts whether I have a girlfriend or I caught you in a weak moment. You told me I had no chance of ever kissing you less than a month ago."

"I don´t know, James," Lily admitted. "I´m so confused."

"Confused? Why?"

Lily bit her lip. ´I´m not confused enough to tell you that.´

"Back in June we were not even on speaking terms," she said aloud. "And then we became friends. And then we kissed. Things are changing so quickly. It´s confusing and I´m not sure it´s right."

"I see."

"Are you angry with me?"

"No, not angry. A bit disappointed."

"Sorry."

"It´s not your fault. It was my choice to lose my heart to a complicated woman."

"I´m not complicated."

James chuckled. "No, not at all. Just tell me before we go back, OK?"

"OK."

"Good night."

-x-

They spent the rest of their holidays with games, snowball fights and practicing magic. Mrs Potter was an excellent spell caster and had some very useful hints for the young folks.

The nights were less pleasant for Lily as she had lots to think about. There was sort of a trial going on in her head. One side claimed to make things up with Severus. The other accused her of being an idiot. To refuse James could mean losing both boys if Severus wasn´t willing to forgive her. And he definitely had something to forgive now, the tiny voice in her head pointed out.

-x-

James waited patiently for Lily´s answer. When he knocked on her door the last evening the girl already waited for him.

"So, did you make your decision?" he asked softly.

Lily stared out of her window. "This is so difficult."

"Telling me you don´t like me?"

"No, making a decision."

"So there´s hope for me? I´m not getting a ´no´?"

"This would be easier."

"Would you like to explain why it´s so difficult? Talking may help."

Lily sighed. "You´re sweet, you know that? You´d even help me decide to dump you, wouldn´t you?"

"Does sweet mean stupid?"

"No, not at all. You´re kind and helpful and unselfish. My problem is that this is happening a bit fast for me." And that I can´t stop thinking about Severus, but I can´t tell you that.

"We can slow it down a bit." James offered.

"How would that work?"

"I mean we don´t have to walk around kissing all day. I never liked those couples snogging all evening in the common room. We can keep it private and see how it develops."

Lily smiled. Things seemed so easy and clear when James explained them. James would never be stubborn and unforgiving like Severus. She couldn´t imagine his voice sounding as cold as Severus´s.

"Let´s try," she said. "Let´s keep it private and see how it works out."

James beamed at her. "Is it OK if I kiss you now?" he asked embarrassedly.

"Well," grinned Lily, "we are in private, aren´t we?"

James stepped closer and kissed his girl.

-x-

Keeping matters private turned out difficult. Black lost no time informing Remus and Pettigrew about the new development. Both lost no time congratulating their friend in a crowded common room. About an hour after their return to Hogwarts rumors raced through the castle that James Potter and Lily Evans were an item. Another hour later the entire student body gossiped that Potter´s best friend had confirmed that rumors were true.

"This is so annoying!" Lily sighed at lunch. "For how long will we be stared at like that? I wish they stopped it!"

"I guess they´ll stop when they know for sure." James pointed out. "We can make them stop them right now."

"What?"

James leaned closer and kissed his girlfriend. Conversations and the rattling of cutlery stopped for a moment. When he let go of Lily students around them hurried to resume eating.

"You see," James smiled. "They aren´t staring any more."

Lily looked around. James was right. She smiled. Her smile froze when she saw Severus in the door. Never before had she seen his face so full of pain and shock. James followed her gaze. Severus´s face closed down when he became aware that he was looked at. Then he turned on the spot and left the great hall.

"Did you see his face?" Black asked Remus and Pettigrew on the opposite side of the table. "It must have been hard to finally see what I´ve been telling him for weeks." He chuckled. Pettigrew grinned. Remus glanced at the door nervously. Was this pity in his eyes?

Lily waited for Black to get up. "You excuse me, dear," she smiled at James and followed Black.

-x-

She dragged the boy into the first empty classroom.

"Tell me this is not true!" she shouted at him.

"What are you talking about?" Black asked coolly.

"Did you or did you not tell Severus lies about me and James."

"I didn´t. What gives you the idea?"

"You just said to your friends you had been telling him for weeks. What have you been telling him?"

"Nothing! Nothing at all!" Black smiled in what was supposed to be a disarming way.

Lily had her wand out with one smooth move. "DON`T LIE TO ME!"

"Well, maybe I mentioned once or twice that I saw you kissing James in our common room."

"WHEN WAS THAT?"

"November?"

Lily cast her nonverbal spell without thinking and Black was smashed against the wall. He lay crumpled on the floor like a thrown away rag doll.

"I tried to make things up with him and you told him I was kissing another boy? You despicable little toad!"

"I did you a favor!" Black groaned and tried to get up.

"A favor! How dare you!"

"Oh come on, Evans," Black sneered and got up on his knees panting heavily. "I told my little story and he believed it. We have been enemies from day one and he believed me more than you. How much can he love you?"

Lily didn´t know what to say. Black had a point.

"By the way, he trampled on your heart for months. How much love can you have left for him?" Black continued.

Lily thought about it. What did she feel for Severus? Was it still love? She wasn´t sure.

Black raised to his feet. "Be honest. You were two kids snogging. There was nothing enabling you to stand a crisis. But you love James, don´t you?"

"I do." Lily whispered. It was a surprise how easy and clear the answer was.

"See, I did you a favor."

"I hate you."

"Do so if you must," Black said coolly. "I´ll stand it as long as you love James."

"You´d do anything for him, wouldn´t you?"

"I thought we clarified that months ago. Now go back to James. He´ll be missing you."

"If you ever try to manipulate me again I´ll make you wish you never met me." Lily turned on the spot to leave.

"Evans!"

"What?"

"I won´t. I´ve achieved all I ever wanted."

-x-

Lily went to her dormitory for her free period. What was she to do? Communicate to Severus that they had been the victims of Black´s plot? Would it change anything if he knew? Probably not. Too much had happened. It would only hurt him more. She decided to say nothing.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27: NEWTs

NEWTs were coming nearer and the teachers once again put their students through their paces.

Lily had to study hard. She had barely time to spend with James. The good thing was she had no time to think about Severus either.

James asked his parents for permission to start a study group at home during the Easter break. It was granted immediately as the house was big enough. So Lily went to the Potters´ with all four marauders.

It was her first independent apparition after having passed her test without problems in February but having had neither time nor reason to apparate since then. Remus had passed his test with her. Pettigrew had splinched again. Black and James had a short discussion who was to take him side by side. At last James gave in and took Pettigrew to his parents´ house.

They arrived shortly after breakfast and were greeted by James´s parents warmly. Mrs Potter showed them their rooms, Lily got the same as before. The view from the window was charming in spring. The lawn was dotted with primroses and at the back of the garden was a pond which Lily hadn´t noticed in winter.

The girl had barely put her things into the cupboard when James knocked. "Let´s go downstairs," he suggested. "I´d like to tell mum and dad we´re more than just friends. I don´t want them to find out by catching us kissing."

"So you plan to kiss me?" Lily teased.

"In fact I do. But only once or twice." He hugged Lily and gave her a light kiss. "A minute."

"This meets excellently with my plans," the girl admitted.

"So let´s go downstairs."

"OK."

James took Lily´s hand and led the way to the kitchen where his mother was preparing lunch.

-x-

Mr Potter was at the kitchen as well. He smiled when his son entered the kitchen holding his friend´s hand.

"Mum, dad, there´s something I´d like to tell you." James started.

Mrs Potter beamed at them.

"If you meant to surprise us, Jamie, you should have let go of her hand before you came to the kitchen." Mr Potter pointed out with a broad smile.

"Oops," James grinned and rumpled up his hair. "You don´t seem surprised or shocked."

"Why would we?" asked Mrs Potter. "I could tell you were interested in Lily when you sent that letter in December. I´m glad she returns your feelings." She hugged them both.

"Welcome to the family, Lily," Mr Potter said and hugged the girl, too.

-x-

They started their study group right after lunch. "We need a schedule," Black pointed out. "Will your parents help us, Prongs?"

"I´ll ask," said James and went to look for his parents.

"We need two days for potions at least," sighed Remus. "I´m really at a loss concerning analysing poisons."

"Lily can help you with this," Black suggested. "She´s the best potions brewer among us. You can help her with Dark Arts in exchange."

"Dad says," James reported when he came back, "we can use his lab for potions tomorrow and the day after that. Mum can help us with Charms and Transfiguration whenever we need her."

"I need at least one day for Runes," Lily pointed out.

"OK, we can do our Devination stuff that day."

Soon they had a schedule for the whole break. Black had made it in less than ten minutes. Lily had to admit his organizing skills were excellent.

-x-

"What are we going to do today?" asked Pettigrew anxiously. He was the only one who had parchment and quills on him which was no surprise seeing that he was the worst student among them. For Lily and the other boys their work during the Easter break was going to make the difference between E and O. For Pettigrew it was a fight for passing his NEWTs.

"Have fun," Black said after consulting his schedule. "Dark Arts, self defence to be exact. We all need a break from books."

Pettigrew frowned. Lily had no way to know but seemingly his abilities in self defence were as limited as in most other subjects.

"OK, let´s make teams. Prongs, you team with Lily, I with Moony," Black commanded.

"What am I to do?" asked Pettigrew.

"You can join the team of your choice. You won´t change the relative strenghts."

Pettigrew blushed. "I´ll work with Prongs."

"We need rules," said Remus. "No spells you don´t know the counter-spell of. No serious injuries. No unforgiveables."

The others agreed.

"Let´s go outside," suggested James. "Mum will not be happy if we ruin the furniture."

-x-

They went to the lawn near the pond which Lily had seen from her window. There they moved into position, wands out.

"On the count of three!" Black commanded. "One, two, three!"

Black and James were fastest. Black hit Pettigrew with a full bodybind, James hit Remus with what could have been a stinging hex. Lily wasn´t sure, but Remus dropped his wand. Obviously Black was the more dangerous opponent.

Lily aimed well. She remembered every word Severus had taught her. "Don´t go for the man, go for the wand." – "Don´t let him hear your spell."

Black´s wand went up due to a nonverbal Expelliarmus. Turning it into a asparagus was a simple act of Transfiguration.

"What...?" Black looked at the vegetable which had seconds before been his wand in disbelief. "Are you mental, woman?" he shouted at the top of his lungs. "Don´t mess with my wand!"

James laughed and freed Pettigrew with a casual wave of his own wand.

"I really don´t know why you´re so upset," said Lily sweetly. "This was not against the rules. James liked my trick." She picked up the asparagus and turned it back into a wand which she handed back to Black with an angelic smile.

"I insist on adding a rule!" fumed Black. "No spells to damage wands!"

"OK," said Lily. "Then I´ll add one, too. No full bodybinds. How´s anyone going to practice when he lies on the ground?"

The others agreed.

The teams held councils of war.

"Sirius will go after Lily next." James pointed out the obvious. "He won´t let her get away with turning his wand into a vegetable. Wormtail, I want you to take care of Moony. I´ll attack Sirius."

Pettigrew nodded.

"What am I supposed to do?" asked Lily.

"Hide behind a shield?" suggested James.

"You wish, dear. I´m not going to let you fight my battles."

"Better be careful. Sirius is angry. He´s dangerous then."

"But he will obey the rules, won´t he?"

"You can be sure of that."

Again they moved into position and started on the count of three. Pettigrew attacked Remus immediately but the boy dodged his spell and retaliated. James had to help.

Lily remembered another of Severus´s lessons. "Don´t be where he expects you to be." She didn´t wait for Black´s attack but left her position as quickly as a cat. Not one moment too soon. "Go for the wand." She sent a series of stinging hexes at Black´s wand arm. "Surprise him." A shield. If she stopped attacking his wand arm he could cast his own spell. A well-aimed spell on the lawn behind him.

Black cried out in triumph when Lily´s spell seemed to miss him. His own spell bounced back from the girl´s shield and hit his partner who had so far done well fighting off James and Pettigrew at the same time. Black didn´t notice the primroses behind him uniting to strong ropes. He only realized something was going on when the flowery garland wound round his body binding his arms. His wand fell useless to the ground. The boy cried out in rage.

Lily smiled. "Watch your back." Severus was a great teacher. She wished there was a way to tell him.

"Let´s call it a day!" suggested James and wiped tears of laughter from his eyes. "I´ll never forget you being caught in that flower bush, Padfoot!"

"Well done, Lily!" cried Remus. "I never thought we´d find a match for Sirius in duelling."

"That was amazing!" said Pettigrew.

Black fumed when they went back inside. He stayed a little behind. Lily waited for him. "We don´t want James in a battle between the two of us, do we?" she smiled sweetly. "So you better stop frowning at me that way now and make a friendly face."

-x-

They spent the next two days in Mr Potter´s private lab. Harold Potter supervised and tutored them himself. Soon it became clear that Lily was the only one who didn´t need his help. On the contrary. She helped him with explaining matters to the four boys.

"You´ve found yourself quite a smart lady, Jamie," said Mr Potter to his son when they left the lab in the evening.

"I know, dad," agreed James proudly. "And she´s not bad looking either."

Lily was rather pleased with both praises.

-x-

It soon became clear that Black wasn´t going to forgive Lily easily for beating him in their duelling battle. As the girl had never thought high of him, she wasn´t surprised that he was willing to use his friend to punish her.

Black never did anything to disturb the group´s study work, on the contrary, he was very co-operative. This attitude ended as soon as their leisure time was concerned. While Remus and Pettigrew were ready to entertain themselves for some time to give their friend private time with his girlfriend, Black sticked to James´s side like glue.

When they spent time as a group of five, he insisted on choosing what they were to do and the only thing anyone could be sure of was that it was the opposite of what Lily liked to do. Remus and Pettigrew watched the battle around James with a mixture of concern and amusement. James himself seemed to be blind concerning the difference between his girl and his best friend.

"What do you think you´re doing?" Lily snapped at Black when James had left the room to get the board game Black wanted to play. (Exactly the one which Lily had suggested the evening before and Black had called boring.)

"Draw the line?" suggested Black with a sneer. "Make clear what will happen if you get into my bad book, Evans."

Remus watched the exchange with anxiety, Pettigrew with anticipation.

Lily snorted. "Draw the line, Black? You watch and learn!"

-x-

"James!" she purred as soon as her boyfriend re-entered the room. "Where did you get that game from? You can´t leave me alone for that long!" She moved over a bit and patted the seat beside her.

James sat down obediently. "You were not exactly alone," he pointed out.

Lily looked around. The movement made her long hair fly like a veil. "They don´t count. Sorry boys." An angelic smile. Intense eye contact. "I missed you so much!" A kiss. Light enough to be given in front of his friends, long enough to make him wish they were not there.

"That´s better. Do we have to play this game, James?" Lily curled a strand of her hair around her finger as if absentmindedly. "Why don´t we go for a walk?"

"We could do that, I guess. The boys can play without us."

"Why don´t we send the boys for a walk and we stay here where it´s cosy?" Lily purred like a cat.

"You´re right, dear. Why don´t we. Boys, if you please..."

"Thank you!" Lily crossed her arms in James´s neck and kissed him. Her right hand waved goodbye to a fuming Sirius Black, an amazed Peter Pettigrew and a grinning Remus Lupin.

-x-

When the boys came back more than an hour later, Lily claimed she wanted hot chocolate and James went to the kitchen to get her some. Lily´s smile vanished as soon as he´d left the room.

"Talking about not getting into bad books, Black," she spat. "You be a good boy or I´ll make sure James never talks to you again."

Black opened his mouth to say something but Lily cut him short. "Don´t start a battle you can´t win. My offer´s a truce. That´s the best you can get as long as you´re not a better kisser than I am."

Pettigrew giggled. "Shut up, Wormtail!" Black was furious.

"She got you, Padfoot." Remus pointed out.

-x-

Black kept to the truce when they returned to school though it had been forced on him. He gave Lily boxes of sweets occasionally, which made James more happy than her. She´d have prefered not to accept presents from someone she disliked so much but to keep peace she took the chocolates with polite words of thanks.

James was happy that his girlfriend and his best pal got along so well.

"You´re the first person to force their will on Sirius." Remus pointed out on the way to Defence Against the Dark Arts.

"I feel a bit bad. I´ve used James in a shabby way."

"Don´t reproach yourself you did," said Remus. "Sirius is using people all the time. I´m not even sure he´s aware he does it. At least James seemed to enjoy your way of manipulation." He blushed.

They nearly ran into Severus at the door of the classroom. Remus looked scared for a moment but relaxed when the Slytherin hurried inside without a second glance at them.

"You and Snape aren´t friends any more?"

"No, he stopped talking to me when he found out about James." Lily said absentmindedly. She hadn´t seen Severus at close range for some time. He looked bad. His skin was pale. He looked overworked and exhausted. His eyes had lost the warmth she had loved. Lily sighed. She wished she could do anything to help her friend. For a friend he was. He would always be. No matter if he cared.

-x-

The last weeks as Hogwarts students passed in an instant. One moment they were sitting in a classroom reviewing with professor McGonagall or an other teacher, the next moment they were gathered in the great hall sitting their NEWT exams.

The exams themselves were very much like OWLs only on a higher level. Written exams took place in the morning, practicals in the afternoon. Lily even recognized some of the examiners.

This was a case of mutuality. The examiners recognized Lily as well, especially the very old wizard who had examined her in Charms and Transfiguration two years before. So she had a good start again and did very well in all her subjects.

The next thing Lily knew was that the headmaster bade them farewell at the feast. She packed her posessions into her trunk and left her dormitory forever. After a quick hug for the girls who had shared her room for seven years she met James in front of the gates and they apparated to his parents´ house.

Lily Evans was no longer a student.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28: Prongs

"Thank you for having me here, Mrs and Mr Potter," said Lily. "I really had nowhere to go before I find a job."

"You just finished a very exhausting school year, dear," cried Mrs Potter. "You can´t think of finding a job immediately!"

"I have to. I have no home and no money to pay for one. I need a job and very soon."

"Don´t talk like that! Here´s your home!"

"I can´t be your guest forever."

"Our guest! You´re a family member, isn´t she, Harold?"

"Of course," Mr Potter agreed. "Jamie´s girl is a family member. As is his best friend." He smiled at Black.

"So it´s settled," said Mrs Potter. "You enjoy your holidays and relax. You can find a job later."

-x-

Although Lily accepted the Potters´ offer to stay gladly, she started reading the wanteds in the Daily Prophet. She didn´t want to miss a good job. It was then that she noticed the reports about deaths, deseases and funny accidents. Soon Lily spent hours every day studying the newspaper.

"What are you reading this for?" asked James one morning. He had been talking about going fishing for days. "Come, the fish won´t wait for us!"

"Where would they go, dear?" Lily asked and looked at him over the paper. "Are you aware that the socalled dark side is actually killing people? Read the paper! People are frightened."

"I heard rumors," admitted James. "Oh come, let´s go! We can discuss this when my fishing rod is cast and we´re waiting for the fish to bite. I thought you were eager to spend a whole day with me. So this is your chance! Sirius visits his uncle and we can go to the lake."

"Don´t sound so accusing! I´m coming." Lily folded the Prophet and laid it on the table. "I haven´t ever been fishing. Do I need something special?"

"No, sweetheart. I do the fishing and you can roast what I catch."

"So I´ll take some sandwiches," said Lily with a teasing smile.

"Don´t you dare!" James laughed.

-x-

They went to a small lake in the Scottish highlands. James led the way to a bay where he cast his rod and fastened it with some rocks.

"That´s it," he explained. "Now we wait." He magicked a blanket out of thin air and stretched on it.

"That´s all? You dragged me through half the country for that?" Lily pointed at the rod. "Five seconds and now we wait?"

"Waiting can be very pleasant! Come!" James patted the blanket beside him.

Lily eyed the boy suspiciously. "You took me here to lure me on that blanket!" She sounded quite accusing.

"What do you think of me!" James was scandalized. "That´s how fishing works! You let the fish come to you and enjoy the wait. You relax. You look at the clouds. And if you don´t like lying in the grass you use a blanket. Come, don´t be shy. I won´t bite you."

"Sorry," Lily muttered and sat beside James.

"No need to apologize. You weren´t all wrong. I really thought of some kissing," James admitted. "But it´s a pity I have to lure you here. I hoped you´d come by your own choice."

"I like to be lured if the right person does it," grinned Lily. She bent down and kissed her boyfriend. "Does this meet what you were thinking about?"

"Exactly!" James smiled at her.

Their little tete-a-tete was interrupted by a soft splashing noise.

"Argh, can´t that fish wait a little?" James got up to take care of the rod. "You greedy little thing!" he scolded the unlucky fish while he dragged it towards him. "You disturbed me in the middle of a flirt! I´ll eat you as a punishment! Ah, what a beauty!" James showed his prey to Lily. "Start a fire! We can cook supper!"

"We finished breakfast only half an hour ago!"

"You can´t catch a fish and not eat it!"

"I´m not talking about not eating it, I´m talking about eating it later! By the way, who´s going to gut it?"

"Isn´t that women´s work?"

"No! Not that I know of."

"OK, I´ll do it. But you start the fire."

"That´s a deal."

Half an hour later the fish – a big trout – was roasting on a spit. Lily sat on the blanket and James joined her.

"Well done!" he pointed at the fish and kissed her.

"Uuuuurgh," Lily moved away from him and turned up her nose. "You smell!" She glanced at James teasingly.

"Message to self: Invent odourless fish." James grinned.

"Show me your hands!" Lily took her wand out and cast a spell.

"Wow," James sniffed. "The stench is gone. Where did you learn that?"

"Beauxbatons Academy."

-x-

James had just drawn Lily to his side when a yell disturbed the silence of the forest. James sat bolt upright and listened. Lily pricked up her ears. Nothing. She already thought her hearing had played her a trick when she heard a wail.

"This sounds like someone is hurt!" she whispered.

James nodded. "We have to see whether we can help." He got up. "Keep your wand at the ready."

"Do you think this is something dangerous?"

"Probably not. Maybe a hiker sprained his foot. Nevertheless – better be careful."

They went into the forest towards the source of the cry, watching out to see before being seen.

They heard something before they saw.

"Stop that now! We have orders!" The angry voice of a man.

"Why can´t we have a bit of fun on our way?" The voice of a second man. "I hate being sent around by a kid! – Crucio!"

Another cry of pain was heard.

Lily paled. Someone was using an unforgivable curse. James signaled her to move very cautiously.

"This kid is brewing the healing draughts we desperately need. Now stop it and help me look for these herbs."

"Come on, five more minutes! Let him wait a bit! He can´t expect us to run to do his bidding. He´s none of us. He´s not even a pureblood!"

"The blonde says he will be one of us soon. All he needs is a little push in the right direction."

"We accept vermin in our ranks now?"

"If this vermin is an ingenious potion brewer and the Dark Lord himself wants him to join we do! You´ve played enough! Kill that muggle and start looking for... Ah, I wish he had a better handwriting!"

There was some murmur in front of them while the two men debated what they were supposed to look for.

Lily and James tiptoed closer. The person who had screamed was indeed a hiker. Only that he had not sprained his foot. He was lying on the ground and struggling for breath.

´You take the left´ James mouthed. Lily nodded. Her heart raced. She wasn´t a bad dueller but never before had she duelled a dark wizard. James silently counted to three and they attacked.

They had the element of surprise but the two men were ready to hurt and to kill while Lily and James were used to taking care not to injure their opponent. Nevertheless the two did well in the beginning. But soon they were fighting a desperate defensive battle.

Everything seemed lost when Lily lost her wand and one of the men broke it in two with a spell. James aimed a jinx at him before he could attack the wandless girl. "Run!" the boy cried.

Lily turned on the spot. Without a wand she was useless in the battle. If she stayed James had to protect her. If she ran one opponent would possibly go after her which gave James a chance to survive. He couldn´t fight both dark wizards at the same time. As quickly as possible Lily disappeared between the trees trying to get a distance and some bushes to restrict his sight between herself and her persuer.

"Stop running and I´ll grant you a painless death!" she heard him shout behind her.

Lily sped up and tried to think of a hiding place. She noticed too late that she was running to the lake. You can´t hide on a beach. In the distance were some big rocks. She could hide behind one of them if she made it there before the man saw her.

She had not come far, when she heard a cold voice behind her. "Stand, redcap, or I´ll stop you!"

Lily froze to the spot and turned. The man who had tortured the muggle moved in on her. A cruel grin played around his mouth.

"So, I got you," he sneered. "What to do with you, beauty." He stroked his wand with his free hand. "I can´t kill you quickly, for this was your reward for not running away. You don´t deserve that."

Lily retreated a step.

The man flicked his wand and a pungent pain touched her left cheek. "Stand, I said," he ordered.

Lily glanced around in fear. What could she do?

The man lifted his wandarm.

Suddenly a huge stag broke forth from the forest and attacked the man with its antlers. The wizard screamed with pain and dropped his wand. The stag stepped on it and broke it. It snorted angryly. The man fled.

Lily watched the animal anxiously as it stamped its hoofs. It looked after the running man until he disappeared between the trees. Then it turned to face her.

Lily retreated some steps but had to stop when she reached the water.

The stag stood still and watched her with warm hazel eyes. After a little while it bowed.

Could it be? Lily stepped nearer cautiously. She raised her arm but didn´t dare to touch the animal. The stag took a step towards her and touched her hand gently with its snout.

"Prongs?" Lily whispered. The stag snorted softly. "Prongs!" Lily sighed with relief and embraced the animal. Tears wetted her face. She slid her fingers into the stags soft fur and kissed it.

After some minutes Lily let go and wiped her tears. Before her eyes the stag changed back into her boyfriend.

"It´s over," he whispered softly and hugged her, "we´re safe!"

-x-

Slowly Lily recovered her breath.

"You´re an animagus!" she exclaimed.

"I am, and an unregistered one. You won´t sell me, will you?"

Lily chuckled. "I won´t," she promised. "Who´s that?"

A man had stepped out of the forest and waved.

"Our rescuer. He apparated in shortly after you ran. He took over and I went to find you as fast as I could."

"Hello!" cried the man. "Are you OK?"

"Yes, thank you, Sir!" James shook the proffered hand. "We wouldn´t if it was not for you though!"

"Thank you for your help!" Lily shook hands with the stranger, too.

"I´m Alastor Moody, Auror," the man introduced himself, "and you are?"

"Lily Evans and James Potter."

"You did a good job back there for someone that young," Moody said. "If it wasn´t for you, that muggle´d be dead."

"Did you catch them?" James asked.

"Only the one who went after the lady, the other disapparated. Had no time for an anti-disapparition shield."

"How did you find us?" Lily wanted to know.

"I didn´t find you. We detected an unforgivable curse. I went after the dark wizard who cast it and arrived just in time."

"Thanks again for your help." James smiled.

"Did they recognize you?" the auror asked.

"Recognize us? I don´t think so. Why?"

"Well, you fought them and one of them got caught. They might want revenge. Depends on how important our capture is for the dark side. We haven't identified him yet."

"Do you think we are in danger?"

"Hopefully not. They may not even know who you are. But you better watch your back for some time! If there are any difficulties, contact me at the ministry. ´Alastor Moody, Auror Office´ will do as an address."

"Thank you, Sir."

-x-

They went back to James´s rod and their fish when Mr Moody had left. The fish was burnt.

"I´ll catch us a new one," James promised and cast the rod.

Lily sat on the blanket. James joined her and lay an arm around her shoulder.

"Are you OK?"

The girl nodded. "I´m just a little shocked. I never met a dark wizard before."

"Nor did I."

"I lost my wand."

"We´ll get you a new one."

"I´m practically a muggle without my wand."

"I´ll do all the magic you want for you."

"That´s sweet. But I feel kind of naked without my own wand." Lily sighed. One year ago she had been unable to do magic herself, too, and another boy had done it for her. The memory was a bit hurtful.

"Let´s enjoy what´s left of today and recover a bit. We can go to Diagon Alley tomorrow."

"I don´t have the money for a new wand."

"Don´t be stupid! My parents will pay your wand gladly." James kissed her cheek.

"Do you think we are safe here? Should we go home?"

"Mr Moody said the aurors will be investigating in the forest. The dark wizards won´t come back."

"Did you tell him what we overheard?"

"Yes. He found it very interesting, although it´s rather useless information as no names were mentioned."

"Look, I think you have caught a fish!"

James got up and made the fish ready for the spit. Soon it was roasting and James returned to Lily´s side.

"Can you remove the odour?" James held his hands out. "You can use my wand."

"I have no objections to try and make fire with your wand. But never ever will I cast a spell at you with a wand I don´t know!"

"You´re right, it´s too risky. Can you stand the stench?"

"Of course! I was only teasing before." Lily bent over to kiss her boyfriend.

-x-

"Oh my god! Dark wizards!" Mrs Potter exclaimed when they told her about their adventure in the evening. She had to sit down.

"Are you injured?" asked Mr Potter.

"No, dad, we´re both OK. Only Lily´s wand was broken."

"So this was really dangerous!" Mrs Potter cried.

"It was, mum, but it´s over and no harm done. I´d like to take Lily to Diagon Alley tomorrow. Can I have the money for her wand?"

"Of course. Take it from the family vault at Gringott´s."

"Thanks, dad."

"I´ll pay it back when I have a job," said Lily.

"If you like, dear, but you need not." Mrs Potter smiled.

-x-

James took Lily side by side to London early the next morning. They popped out of thin air in a park, hidden behind some bushes.

"I nearly forgot the advantages of side by side apparition," purred Lily and embraced James a little longer than necessary.

"So you don´t want a wand?"

"Are you mental? Of course I want a wand!" Lily let go of James and led the way to the Leaky Cauldron.

James laughed and followed her.

Their first stop at Diagon Alley was the wizard bank, where a goblin took them in a small cart down to the Potter family vault. Lily had never before been in the caves below the white building as her parents always had changed muggle money at one of the counters in the entrance hall of the bank.

The ride itself was interesting, a little like going in a rollercoaster. When they reached their goal, James gave a small key to the goblin who opened a vault for him. Never before had Lily seen so much money. Piles of coins filled the vault to its corners.

James filled his purse. The goblin locked the vault and gave the key back.

-x-

"Let´s get the wand first," James suggested. "We can look at the other shops later."

Lily agreed.

They went straight to Olivander´s. They had to wait for a little while because Mr Olivander was busy finding a wand for a kid who must be a Hogwarts first year. The boy – small and brunet, with very pale blue eyes – waved wand after wand but none reacted to his presence. His parents were watching with increasing concern.

"Don´t despair," said Mr Olivander in a comforting voice. "I´ve found the right wand for every young wizard so far. I´m sure I have one for you, too. We have to be patient." He handed the boy another wand.

The kid took it and waved it. Blue sparks shot out of the wandtip. His parents were delighted.

"Brilliant," cried MrOlivander. "Oak with a core of unicorn hair. Why didn´t I think of it at once!"

The boy´s parents payed the wand and Mr Olivander wrapped the box in brown paper. When the family left the shop they were already discussing where to get the boy´s school robes.

"Ah, I remember you! Miss Evans and Master Potter!" Mr Olivander greeted his next customers. "What can I do for you?"

"I need a new wand," said Lily.

"What happened to your old?"

"It was damaged beyond repair," sighed Lily. "I hope I can get one which fits me equally well."

"Let´s see," MrOlivander smiled. "You had willow last time. Springy. Excellent for charms. I take it you´re good at charms."

"Yes, Sir. Charms and Potions."

"Charms and Potions. Not a very common combination." Mr Olivander started scanning the shelfes for boxes. "Let´s stick to willow. Willow is good for charms. And," he climbed a ladder to get a box from the top shelf, "a core of unicorn hair. Unicorn hair is used in potion brewing. So this combination might suit you."

He offered Lily a wand to try. She waved it and sparks of green left the wandtip, but only few.

"Ah, a good start. If we are lucky," the wandmaker pointed out, "we may only need experiment with the length."

Lily tried out five wands of the same materials each a quarterinch longer than the last. Each produced some sparks but none very many. She knew she had found her wand when she touched the sixth. A cosy warmth ran up her arm and covered her very being. When she waved it sparks and little white flowers left the wandtip and rained down on her and the two men. An eerie music seemed to fill the room though she wasn´t sure whether it was not only inside her head.

"We got a hit, obviously," smiled Mr Olivander. "Do you want it in a box or will you take it like it is?"

"I won´t need a box, thank you," said Lily and pocketed her new wand. James paid.

-x-

"Did you find what you needed, Miss Evans?" asked a cool voice when they left the shop. A blonde man in his twenties was turning to them. Seemingly he had been viewing the shop window which was strange seeing that it held only one very old wand. Lucius Malfoy smiled a calculating smile.

"I found what I came for," said Lily.

"I´m pleased to hear that," Malfoy went on, "ah, Mr Potter. I see the rumors are true."

"The rumors?"

"Rumor has it that your little mistletoe episode had consequences. Anyway, have fun with your new wand, Miss Evans." Lucius Malfoy nodded at them and disappeared in the crowd.

"We need to contact Mr Moody at once," said James. "Let´s go home."

-x-

Alastor Moody called at the Potter house less than three hours later.

"What is it you want to discuss with me?" he asked and shook his head at the offered cup of tea.

"We went to Diagon Alley today to get a new wand for Lily," James reported. "We ran into Lucius Malfoy in front of Olivander´s. He knew that it was Lily who needed a wand, not me."

"You´re quick on the uptake, Mr Potter. Lucius Malfoy is suspected of being a Deatheater but we have no proof."

"A Deatheater, Sir?"

"That´s what the Dark Lord´s followers call themselves. So Mr Malfoy waited in front of Olivander´s to find out which redhaired woman came for a new wand. That´s bad."

"Why is that bad?" asked Lily.

"Lucius Malfoy rolls in gold. He has servants to lace his shoes. If he takes the effort to find out who you are himself, it must be really important for him."

Lily held her breath. "So the man you caught yesterday was important?" she asked after a pause.

"Not really, he´s only a low rank in Voldemort´s organization. When we identified him, I was sure you were in no danger."

"We should have waited some days to get my wand."

Mr Moody shook his head. "If you´re important enough to get Lucius Malfoy to Diagon Alley, you´re important enough to have Olivander´s observed for a long period."

"Will you arrest Mr Malfoy? He´s the blonde those two were talking about yesterday." James pointed out.

"Oh dear, no. Though I believe that he indeed is the blonde mentioned we have no proof for it. And today he was only viewing shop windows. That´s no crime."

"What are we to do?"

"You must regard yourselves targets of the dark side. Don´t go anywhere alone. Don´t go out in public if you don´t have to. Watch your back. And you, Miss Evans, get familiar with your new wand as quickly as possible. I may have a way to protect you but it requires decisions I´m not authorized to make. I´ll be back when I´ve spoken to the person in charge." Alastor Moody got up. "Thanks for the tea. Take care."

-x-

Mrs Potter had followed the conversation in silence. As soon as the auror had left she started to cry.

"Oh, my boy," she lamented, "a target of the dark side! Don´t go out in public! Sentenced to a life in hiding! Oh my boy!"

James sat by her and hugged her and patted her back. Nothing he did or said could comfort her.

Lily went to the kitchen and made a calming tea for Mrs Potter and though the woman accepted it gratefully it had no effect on her.

"I really wish dad was here," said James helplessly.

"When will he come?"

"Only in the evening. Mum, you really have to calm down!"

In the end James called a healer. The elderly wizard took a close look at Mrs Potter and had James tell him what upset her so much. At last he decided that Mrs Potter should stay at St. Mungo´s over night.

"The excitement can be dangerous for a person her age. We don´t want to be uncautious," he explained. He contacted the wizard hospital through the floo network and within minutes two ambulance wizards came through to help him with his patient.

-x-

Lily and James waited for Mr Potter in the darkening living room. Neither felt like turning the light on. They sat side by side holding each other´s hand like frightened children.

"Hello, anyone at home?" Mr Potter´s merry cry broke the silence and lifted the rigidity off James and Lily.

"We are here, dad, in the living room," James cried.

"What are you doing in the dark?" asked Mr Potter and lit some candles with a flick of his wand. "Ooops, I didn´t disturb you, did I?"

Lily blushed.

"Where´s your mother? There´s no light on in the kitchen."

"Mum is at ´s." James reported what had happened.

"Merlin! Targets of the dark side? And mum in hospital! Can we see her?"

"The healer said we can go tomorrow. They gave her a calming potion and she´s fast asleep now. If everything goes well, we can take her home tomorrow."

"Thanks god! You gave me quite a shock!"

Lily got up. "I´ll make supper," she said and left for the kitchen to give father and son time to discuss matters in private.

-x-

James and his father went to St. Mungo´s the next morning to take Mrs Potter home. Lily stayed behind to prepare a meal for the patient.

Mrs Potter looked very pale and tired when she returned to her home and James and her husband observed her with concern. They insisted she take a nap immediately after lunch.

-x-

Black returned from his uncle later that day and James had to tell what had happened one more time. This time the tale was even longer because he mentioned the part where he had rescued Lily in his animagus form.

A thought of comprehension crossed Lily´s mind. Prongs. And Padfoot. And Wormtail and Moony.

"James," she said when the latter had finished, "if you are Prongs, a stag, what is Padfoot?"

James glanced at Black nervously. Black smirked. "I guess she can´t sell me without selling you," he said and transformed into a big shaggy black dog. Moments later he was a young man again.

"This is really difficult magic," gasped Lily. "You have been using these names since our fifth year!"

"It took us two years to find out how to do it," said Black with pride.

"So what animals are Wormtail and Moony?"

"This is not our secret to tell," said James, "you have to ask them."

"Did you follow the auror´s advice?" Black changed topic. "Did you get accustomed to your new wand?"

"Not yet. We were so busy." And paralyzed by fear. She didn´t say the last aloud.

"You better get started. Seeing the danger you´re in, you should practice duelling."

"You´re right, Padfoot," said James. "Come, Lily, we´ll go outside and practice."

-x-

Lily wasn´t happy to practice with her new wand in Black´s presence. She couldn´t be sure of her magic with a wand she knew not well. Facing a person with whom she shared mutual hatred seemed not inviting for her.

Black must have read her thoughts on her face for he stepped nearer and whispered softly "No need to be concerned. I can distinguish between a childhood grudge and a dangerous situation."

"Do some easy spells first," suggested James and Black agreed. Lily nodded. She started with levitating some stones, continued with summoning them to her side and finished with arranging them in a pyramide.

James clapped his hands. "Not bad! Go on, don´t stop!"

Lily put her new wand through its paces. She transfigured the stones into various gardening objects and back into stones. She sorted the stones by color and size. She let the stones zoom around in the garden in a complicated dance and made some of them glow and blink.

"I think we can risk a training battle now," cried Black. "As you´ll need to defend yourself, we´ll attack and you´ll try to beat us off."

The suggestion made sense and so they followed it. The two boys started with easy jinxes and moved on to more serious curses. Lily did well in defending herself.

When it grew too dark to go on, they went inside. Lily had to go to the kitchen and cook for Mrs Potter was too weak to do it.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29: A Quick Decision

Mrs Potter recovered slowly. She spent most of the time in her bedroom. James was very concerned. Lily could tell by the pensive expression on his face. He laughed only on rare occasions those days.

The next week brought an unexpected visitor. Lily had just come back to the kitchen after bringing breakfast to Mrs Potter´s room. James interrupted his conversation with Black about enlarging the garden pond and offered her another cup of coffee when it knocked at the front door.

"Do we expect anyone?" asked Lily nervously.

"Not that I know of," said James.

"Perhaps your dad came back?"

"Why would he knock at his own door?" Black asked.

"Perhaps he forgot his key?"

"This is a wizarding household. There is no key."

"Stop it, you two. I´ll answer the door, Sirius, you stay with Lily." James left the kitchen.

"Dark wizards wouldn´t knock, would they?"

"Probably not," Black reassured the anxious girl.

James was back in a minute. "You won´t believe it," he whispered. "Albus Dumbledore is sitting in our living room and he wants to talk to us. Help me get him some tea."

Lily waved her wand and shoved a tray with cups into Black´s hands. James got a plate of biscuits and Lily herself carried the teapot.

-x-

Albus Dumbledore sat on the sofa, twiddling his thumbs and humming. He got up when Lily entered and shook her hand after she had set down the teapot.

"Ah, Master Black," surprise showed on Dumbledore´s face for a moment. He shook Black´s hand, too.

"As my presence comes to a surprise to you, Sir, I take it this conversation was not planned to include me." Black smiled. "I´ll take care of the pond, James." He turned to leave.

Dumbledore frowned. "Please stay, Master Black," he said. "Your presence might be useful."

They sat down and Lily poured tea. Dumbledore accepted his cup gratefully and took a sip. The three young people watched him with anticipation.

"I have been informed by my old friend Alastor that you two attacked two deatheaters. A light course of action which would have cost both your lives hadn´t Alastor arrived in time."

"We couldn´t let them kill that muggle!" Lily exclaimed.

Dumbledore smiled. "Of course you couldn´t, Miss Evans. But you will admit that you were ill prepared for this task."

"You´re saying we were stupid to intervene?" asked James.

"Oh no! Fighting evil is never stupid, Master Potter. In fact I´m looking for people who are ready to face evil where they meet it. People like you." He took another sip of tea and watched them over the rim of his glasses.

The youngsters looked at each other.

"Sir, what do you mean by ´you´re looking for people like us´?" Lily spoke aloud what all three were thinking.

Dumbledore placed his cup on the table carefully. "I have the honor of leading a group of witches and wizards who work hand in hand to fight Lord Voldemort and his followers. I invite you to join. We can prepare you for fighting the dark side. We can back you up when you need it. We usually don´t recruit teenagers but Alastor told me you did well out there and you could do with some backup. So, what do you say?"

Dumbldore looked from one face to the other.

"Fight the dark side with you, Sir?" Lily broke the silence. "I´d be glad to do that!"

James and Black agreed.

"Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, my young friends!" beamed Dumbledore. "I´ll have you picked up for our next meeting which will be in about two weeks. You´ll hopefully find time to study these advanced duelling techniques till then."

He handed Lily a small booklet and got up.

"Needless to mention that our organization is secret. You will not mention it to one living soul."

"We won´t, Sir," the three promised.

The professor accepted their word with a nod and left.

-x-

"Let´s look at this!" James suggested and pointed at the booklet.

"Do so, I´ll clean away the cups," Lily agreed.

When she came back from the kitchen, the boys looked disappointed.

"Who can read this?" Black asked. He sounded annoyed.

Lily took the booklet from James and opened it. "I can. These are runes. I´ll have to translate them before we can get started."

"How long will it take?"

"Depends on how complicated the text is. Something from a day to a week."

"What can we do to help?" asked Black. He hated watching without being part of the action.

"Take over the cooking?" Lily suggested.

Black wasn´t thrilled but James agreed. "What have you planned for lunch?" he asked.

"Chicken soup. It will do good to your mum."

"I have no idea how to make chicken soup," confessed Black. "And in case James hasn´t hidden a hobby from me all these years, he hasn´t either."

Lily sighed. "I think I can translate and supervise you at the same time. I need the kitchen table."

-x-

Lily sat at the table with her dictionary, the booklet and parchment. The boys worked beside the sink. Black had lost the toss who was to cut up the chicken. He was fighting a desperate battle against the dead bird and his own uneasiness, while James was happily chopping vegetables.

"Do we really need to cut the legs off?" Black asked meekly.

"Yes. Now stop complaining. One clean cut there" – Lily flicked her wand and marks where to cut appeared on the chicken – "and it´s done."

Black obeyed. Lily worked on her translation while the boys tried to follow her instructions.

"What do you mean by ´stir like acne salve´?" asked Black.

Lily sighed. Cooking had been easier with Severus.

-x-

The boys were proud when they presented a bowl of soup to Lily. It smelled very good. The girl took a spoonful.

"Not bad," she praised their work. "Maybe you should add a little salt. But that´s a matter of opinion."

James brought some soup to his mother. When he returned to the kitchen, the teenagers ate.

In the afternoon the boys worked in the garden. James tried out his plans concerning the pond and Black assisted. Lily stayed inside and continued her translation.

-x-

It took her five days to translate the whole booklet. The text contained descriptions of defensive moves and various shield spells. The most interesting was a spell called the patronus charm. It was supposed to create a moving shield which – according to the booklet – took the corporeal form of an animal and was characteristic for the witch or wizard who conjured it.

In the margin was a handwritten note that his spell was very difficult but very important. It didn´t explain why that was.

-x-

"Let´s try the important spell first," suggested James. "It says it is difficult. We´ll need time to master it."

"What do we have to do?" asked Black in anticipation.

Lily explained. "You choose a strong happy memory and concentrate on it. The incantation is ´Expecto patronum´. There´s no special wand movement required."

"This soulds easy. Where´s the problem?"

"The choice of the memeory. The text says it has to be pure and good. Happy and strong."

They sat in silence for a while trying to figure out which of their memories would be best for a patronus.

"I´ll try," James said at last. He got up, concentrated and spoke the spell. A silver cloud left the tip of his wand. "Well," he said, "not exactly an animal but I guess not bad for a first attempt."

"What memory did you chose, pal?" Black asked.

James blushed. "Our first kiss. The first real one, not that mistletoe thing."

"If it worked for you, it should work for Evans as well. Go ahead!" Black looked at Lily expectantly.

Lily concentrated on the memory. It was happy. Confidently she spoke her spell but nothing happened.

James looked hurt. "It seems this moment wasn´t equally happy for both of us."

"It wasn´t," Lily reminded him. "I had this row with my brother then and I wasn´t happy most of the time." She kissed James.

"I´ll go and look whether mum needs anything." James headed for the door.

"Don´t be angry with me, James!" Lily called after him.

-x-

"You told him Snivellus was your brother?" Black stared at Lily in disbelief. "And he believed you?"

"Severus is my brother as a matter of fact. Now look at you. So much spying for years and years and you never found out."

"You kissed your brother?" Black was shocked.

"My foster-brother. You´re stupid, you know? So, what memory will you use? Do you have one which is not full of malice?"

"Hear who´s talking. Do you have one which is not full of secrecy and lies?"

-x-

"Are you angry with me?" Lily asked James anxiously when he returned.

"No, of course not. I was silly, forgive me." He kissed her. "I had completely forgotten how unhappy you were about that row. And how bad you must feel as it was never made up."

"There´s nothing to be done. Severus won´t talk to me. You can´t make up things without talking."

"Did you think of another memory?"

Lily shook her head. "I need some time to think about it."

"What about you, Padfoot?"

"I have one." Black got up on his feet and cast the spell. A silvery stag circled the living room twice before it dissolved.

"Wow! Good work, Padfoot!" James cried. "Though why a stag?"

"Perhaps because it´s the animagus form of my best friend?"

James grinned. "I feel honored."

-x-

Lily lay awake in her bed and tried to think of a memory for her patronus. So her first kiss with James wasn´t good enough. Perhaps the moment on the beach would do. When she found out James was the stag which had saved her. But when she thought about it, fear touched her soul and she remembered the dark wizard. No, this memory wouldn´t do.

Perhaps she had to go back in time. Her life had been too troubled the past few months. The difference with Severus had been hard for her. It lay like a shadow on every memory. But how far back was she to go?

The moment she found out that she was a witch? Understanding why things happened had indeed been happy. But then the girl remembered her sister´s reaction. Lily sighed. This was really difficult.

Her time with Severus? No. As Black had said. Too much secrecy. And the memory of their difference.

Beauxbatons? Yes, that year had been happy. But were theses memories strong enough to protect her from evil?

Lily had nearly fallen asleep when a thought crossed her mind. She remembered little white flowers. A pleasant scent. An embrace. The day Severus had cast his first spell outside school. He had waited for months to do it. And he´d saved it for her. The very thought filled her heart with warmth. Lily searched for traces of bitterness. But most astonishingly the row didn´t affect this memory. The girl could only guess why. Was it because it was isolated? This moment had no after-effects. It was just one very happy minute in her life.

Lily got up silently and took her wand. She concentrated on the little flowers and their scent. "Expecto patronum!" Her voice was barely a whisper. A silver bat left the tip of her wand and circled the room before it dissolved to silvery vapor.

A bat? Why on earth was her patronus a bat? Lily crawled back under her blanket. She had even more to think about than before.

-x-

They resumed work the next morning after breakfast. Black proudly showed his stag patronus again. James retried and this time his patronus took the form of a small four-legged animal for some seconds.

"Now it´s your turn, dear," he smiled at Lily. "Could you come up with a memory?"

"I think so," the girl smiled back feebly. But I can´t tell you which. She muttered her spell and sure enough her tiny bat patronus emerged from her wand and circled her head looking out for dangers to protect her from.

"A bat?" James looked disappointed. Seemingly he had hoped his girlfriend´s patronus would be a stag, too. "What memory did you choose?"

"A childhood memory." Lily replied evasively.

"It´s a bit small, your bat. Don´t you think so?" Black interjected. "I wonder whether the size of your patronus matters."

"I don´t think so," James replied. "Lily´s bat may be small but its form seemed more stable to me than your stag´s."

"Let´s work on the other spells and the moves for a while," Lily suggested. "The professor won´t be happy with us if we work on only one task. Even if he said it was important."

The boys agreed and they spent the rest of the day practicing on the back lawn. They interrupted work only to cook and eat.

-x-

It was nearly three weeks after professor Dumbledore´s visit and Lily was beginning to doubt that she had actually spoken to him when Alastor Moody and a young couple showed up. The man was tall and slim with reddish brown hair. The woman roundfaced with dark brown hair and a friendly smile.

"These are the Longbottoms," Mr Moody introduced the couple. Both nodded friendly. "We have a meeting today. We´ll take you side by side."

They went down the road together for apparating from the garden was impolite and would have alarmed Mrs Potter. Mrs Longbottom went by Lily´s side and chatted cheerfully all the way.

"I was so glad you joined!" she confessed. "There are mostly men in the Order and the few women are way older than I am. I feel sort of isolated sometimes. I hope we´ll be friends."

Lily smiled. It was easy to think of friendly Mrs Longbottom as a friend.

"I hope so, too, Mrs Longbottom," she said.

"I´m Alice," the woman said and smiled her unchanging smile.

Lily was about to introduce herself with her first name when Mr Moody signalled them they had walked far enough to apparate. Alice offered Lily her arm and the next moment they were standing on a hill surrounded by fields and hedges.

Mr Moody led the way down the path towards a small cottage which looked rather like a pigsty than a house.

"I´m Lily," the girl finished the introductions. Alice smiled.

-x-

They were the last to arrive. Lily knew only two of the people assembled in the small kitchen. There was Hagrid, the Hogwarts gamekeeper. And professor Dumbledore.

The professor welcomed the new members warmly and introduced them to the group. Two of the unknown wizards were introduced as the Prewitt brothers, Fabian and Gideon. Their hair was flaming red and both had warm hazel eyes.

"Don´t you think they´re a bit young, Albus?" asked Gideon.

"They qualified as members through their attitude," Dumbledore answered. "Alastor tells me they acted as true members of the order. We can train them up to make up for their lack of experience. We all started young, didn´t we?"

Mr Moody – Alastor for members of the order – reported several incidents similar to the one near the lake. He was not the only auror present. Frank and Alice Longbottom were aurors, too. They had been investigating in the forest after the lake incident.

Lily had not been aware how many attacks there were. Seemingly only a small percentage was reported in the newspapers. The girl got the feeling that the world was on war and she hadn´t realized it.

"We need someone to practice with our youngest members before we can assign them to tasks," Dumbledore pointed out when the meeting neared its end.

The Longbottoms and the Prewitts volunteered.

"Did you master the patronus charm?" the professor addressed the teenagers directly for the first time.

"To some extent, Sir," said Lily. "We´re not sure how well we did for neither of us has ever seen a patronus before."

"Show me!" Dumbledore ordered.

Black showed his patronus first. Dumbledore nodded. "Not bad, Master Black. You need to concentrate a little harder to make your patronus more stable. Try the spell nonverbally. It usually helps." Black followed the advice and really, his patronus became more distinct and it took longer to dissolve.

James was next. The professor watched his rather feeble patronus with interest. "You may want to consider another memory, Master Potter. Either that or you need to concentrate harder." James promised to think of another memory and practice.

Lily was the last to show her patronus. She murmured her spell and her tiny bat patronus emerged. It circled her head like always.

Alastor Moody had his wand out in an instant. As soon as he pointed it at Lily the patronus attacked him to distract him from Lily.

"Alastor, put that wand down!" cried the professor. The other wizards gasped. Lily had no idea what the agitation was about.

Dumbledore smiled reassuringly at the girl. "I take it you have no idea why Alastor was so upset by your patronus," he said when the bat had finally vanished into thin air.

"No, Sir."

"Well, bats are considered to be dark creatures by many. But we must be aware," he addressed Alastor now, "that they are also very useful, especially for potion brewing. Miss Evans is an excellent brewer, so a bat patronus, however unusual it may be, is no surprise in her case. It shows how dearly connected she is with potions work and anything connected with it."

Alastor Moody eyed Lily suspiciously but was content with the professor´s explanation.

-x-

"We are using patronuses," the professor explained, "as messengers. A patronus can´t be intercepted or copied. So it is a very safe way to communicate." He waved his wand and a silvery bird left it. It flew to Lily and for a moment she heard the professor´s voice inside her head. "That´s how it works," it said.

"You´ll continue practicing with your patronuses so that we can teach you how to send messages soon," Dumbledore ordered.

-x-

It was barely noon when the meeting was over. The Longbottoms and Prewitts stayed behind to practice with the new members like they had promised to. Alice got the task of preparing a meal while the men took the teenagers outside.

"Let´s see what you can do and what you need to learn first," said Fabian. "We´ll attack you and you defend yourselves. You can use any spell you can think of but unforgivables, of course. Don´t be afraid to hurt us, we can do some healing and you need to be ready to hurt your enemy when you face the dark side."

They started on the count of three. Lily dodged spells and hid behind shields. She tried to figure out a pattern in the men´s moves. James and Black meanwhile attacked them with various spells. Soon it became clear to Lily why they couldn´t win the battle. The three men were acting as a group but the teenagers acted as individuals. The three men divided into two defenders and one attacker, changing roles from time to time.

Lily had never learnt to act as a member of a group in combat. Severus had prepared her for one on one fights but not for team work as they had never had anybody to team up with. So she watched her opponents closely and tried to learn from their moves.

"James," she cried when she thought she had got an idea how to move, "hide behind my shield and concentrate on attack from there. I´ll protect you." It worked. For the first time in more than a quarter hour James managed to hit an opponent. Frank howled with surprise and pain but attacked the youngsters more fiercly without caring about his injury.

James and Black were quick learners. They started to work as a team and soon the teenagers were able to stand their ground while minutes before the men had driven them back without much effort.

After another quarter hour Alice called for a pause as she had lunch ready. The six combatants wiped the sweat from their foreheads and went to join her in the kitchen where Alice served a delicious dish of lentils.

"You´re doing not bad," admitted Gideon between two spoonfuls.

"The boys are not bad," agreed Fabian, "but the girl is dangerous. She's analysing the opponent. You can´t fool her easily."

Frank nodded but said nothing. Alice was treating his wrist with a healing charm and he seemed to enjoy it a lot.

"Stop talking about fighting at my table," said Alice when she had finished Frank´s healing and taken a plate of lentils herself. "We may be at war but there have to be times to relax."

"Forgive us," said Fabian. "we´re just happy that our new members need less training than we feared."

"How´s your sister doing?" Alice changed topic.

"Molly? Fine. Her baby is due in two weeks."

"That´s good. Hug her for me when you see her."

"Is it her first baby?" Lily asked.

"Heavens no!" Gideon replied. "It´s her third."

"She makes a great mum," Alice pointed out. "She always seemed motherly to me back at school although she was younger than me."

"Younger than you! And her third baby!" Lily exclaimed.

"Yes, why not?" asked Alice.

The Prewitts got up. "Let´s go outside, guys," said Fabian. "They are talking about women and baby stuff." All five males left for the garden.

"Men!" Alice complained. "They have no problems with making babies but they are less enthusiastic when it comes to caring for them."

Lily blushed crimson.

"Oops!" Alice smiled apologetically. "I thought you and James were... I didn´t want to embarrass you. Sorry."

"He´s my boyfriend," said Lily. "But for anything else we´re too young, I guess."

"Are you? Frank and I got married at the age of nineteen. What would we have waited for? We knew we would stay together. Molly and Arthur were only eighteen." Alice shrugged. "We´d better go outside, too. You have to resume your training session."

-x-

The afternoon was hard work. The Prewitts showed them new moves and spells and had them practice again and again.

When they finally apparated home – not without making an appointment for more training the next week and being given homework – Lily was exhausted. Nevertheless she went to the kitchen to prepare dinner for Mrs Potter had only had sandwiches for lunch.

After the meal the girl went to her bedroom. She needed to relax and get some sleep. She was about to change into her nightdress when it knocked at the door.

She rebuttoned her robes before she asked her visitor in. It was James.

"Can I talk to you?" he asked. Lily got the impression that he was a bit nervous.

"You talked to me all day, didn´t you?"

"I mean in private."

"Of course you can." Lily sat on her bed and waited for James to start the conversation.

Unlike his usual self-confident manner James seemed to have difficulties to decide how to begin. "I talked to Frank today and I have been thinking about this for some time before. I could protect you all the time. And it would cheer mum up a bit." He looked at Lily expectantly.

"James, I have no idea what you´re talking about!"

James blushed and sank on his knee. He rummaged in his pocket and produced a small box. "Lily," he said, "will you marry me?"

Lily was taken aback. Marry? At the age of eighteen?

"James," she said, "I don´t mean to hurt you, but I never thought of getting married that early."

"Think about the advantages," James insisted. "It drives me mad that I can´t protect you in case we´re attacked at night. Someone could kill you and I wouldn´t notice in my room."

"Don´t be ridiculous." Lily was getting angry. "Protect me at night! You´re after my skirt, that´s all."

James got up. "I´m not! And if I was, so what! We´re two adults. There´s nothing wrong with me wanting more than just kiss."

"We are too young to get married. I want a job. I´m not even trained for a proper job. I can´t become a housewife and mother two months after I finished school!"

James laughed. "Is that your concern? I´m talking about getting married. Not about getting babies by Christmas. My parents were married nearly fifty years before I was born. Although I´d prefer to have kids a little bit earlier. And I have no problem with you getting trained for whichever job you like. I love you. I want you to be happy. And I want to marry you. And I´ll admit that I´m after your skirt. But that´s not the reason I want to marry you."

Lily thought about her conversation with Alice. What would they wait for if they already knew they would stay together?

"No babies in the next few years?" she asked.

"No babies before you want them."

"In this case, I´d love to marry you, James."

James beamed at her and pulled her into a passionate hug. They kissed. After some minutes Lily freed herself from her now fiancé´s arms. "We are not yet married!" she scolded. "Get out of my room, you monster!" She hit James´s fingers and laughed.

"May I tell my parents?" asked James before he left.

"No, WE´ll tell them tomorrow, OK?"

"Good night, my wife to be." James smiled happily.

"Good night!" Lily shoved him towards the door.

"Hey, you forgot something important!" James laughed and shook the little box.

Lily took and opened it. It held a golden ring with a bright green stone. "This is beautiful, James!" she exclaimed.

"I´m glad you like it," James said. "I won´t go before you wear it on your finger."

Lily offered him her left hand and James slipped the ring on her finger. "Perfect!" he whispered.

"It is," Lily agreed.

"Not the ring, silly. You!"

Lily blushed. "Go now!" she insisted. When the door closed on the boy, she smiled happily. So now she was a bride.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30: The Wedding

"Get married?" Mr Potter looked at his son doubtfully. "Don´t you think you´re a bit young?"

"He´s not. They are not!" Mrs Potter cried before James could answer the question. "Oh, I´m so glad! My baby will have his own family! He will not be all alone when I... when we..." She smiled and cried at the same time. Her husband offered her a handkerchief to wipe her tears.

Black grinned broadly. "Congrats, you two! I always knew you were meant for each other!" he cried cheerfully.

Mrs Potter started planning the wedding immediately. "When do you want the ceremony to take place? We´ll celebrate in the garden of course. We need a guest list!"

"The guest list has to be short, Mrs Potter," said Lily. "Don´t forget we still have to be careful about the deatheaters."

"A short guest list? The better! We can organize this quickly with a short guest list. And stop calling me Mrs Potter, girl. It´s ´mum´ for my Jamie´s wife."

-x-

The guest list turned out to be short indeed. James had no relatives but his parents and only three friends he wanted to invite. Lily had no family at all. At least none who would come to her wedding.

"But why won´t you try to invite your sister?" James insisted. "Your wedding is important. She won´t want to miss it."

"You don´t know her. She despises magic. She´d rather fight a lion barehandedly than attend a wizard wedding."

"And your brother? He´ll forget his grudge on such an important occasion."

"Believe me, dear. He won´t."

"So you only invite Myra?"

Lily nodded. "I´ll write her a letter. I do hope she has time to come over from France."

"So we have a total of six guests and us. Not a big wedding."

"We can invite Alice and Frank. They´re nice. And they sort of gave us the idea."

"We can do that. What about the other members of the order?"

"Why not. We need some guests."

-x-

They decided to wed on Lily´s birthday, the 31st of August. Oddly enough James insisted on checking a moon calendar first. Mrs Potter – mum she was now – started planning the cold buffet at once. She also promised to get a minister and a band. So all Lily had to do was write and send the invitations.

The letter she sent to Myra was rather short. "Dear Myra!" it said. "I´m getting married on August, the 31st. We´d be honored if you and Pierre attended the wedding. For reasons I can´t give in a letter I can´t tell you where the wedding takes place. If you´ll come I´ll have you picked up. Please answer soon, love Lily."

"Don´t come back without an answer!" Lily instructed D´Artagnan. The owl hooted and took off.

It came back three days later. The answer was short and reading it was hurtful. "Dear Lily!" it said. "Unfortunately we can´t come to your wedding. We´re going to visit Pierre´s uncle in Egypt. He wants me to meet his family. So please hug your groom from me, Myra. PS: You won´t make him wear pink, will you?"

"What does she mean by ´wear pink´?" asked James.

"Just a joke between friends," answered Lily in false cheerfulness. She hadn´t mentioned in her letter whom she was going to marry and Myra had thought... "Excuse me for a moment, dear." She got up and went upstairs. She reached her room just in time before tears wetted her cheeks.

-x-

James knocked at her door twenty minutes later. "Are you OK?" he asked with concern.

"Yes, I´ll come downstairs in a minute."

"Lily, are you crying?"

"No."

"You´re a bad liar. May I come in?"

"Yes." What else was she to say? No, stay away, I´m crying for a lost love?

James opened the door cautiously and went over to where Lily was sitting on the floor leaning her back against the bed. He sat beside her and lay his arm around her shoulder. "What is it, sweetheart?" he asked softly.

What reason was she to give him? The truth would only hurt him.

"Neither my family nor my best friend are coming to my wedding," she sniffed at last. "I know there´s nothing to be done. But it´s sad." She wiped her tears with her palms.

James kissed her wet cheeks. "I´ll see what I can do about it," he promised.

"James, I don´t want you to do anything about it." Lily reassured him.

-x-

The next day brought a severe difference of opinion. James wanted to make Black his best man. Lily was not delighted, not at all.

"Why can´t it be Remus. He´s OK. You know I don´t like Black!" Lily nagged.

"He´s my best friend, dear. He´d be hurt if I made anyone else best man."

"I´d be hurt if you made him."

"Lily, don´t make me choose between you and my best friend!" James begged.

"I don´t want him near me on my wedding day!"

"Sweetheart, he deserves it! Think of it! We´d never even gone out were it not for him. I´d have given up when you refused my invitations for two years. But Sirius encouraged me to ask you again. And here we are. In love and planning our wedding. Where Sirius will be best man."

"James, please!"

"No! You´ve been getting along quite well with each other these last months. I really don´t understand why you´re so refusing."

Lily sighed. Sweet James. He really had no idea how much his best friend and his fiancé despised each other. What was she to tell him? That she´d been accepting Black´s gifts of sweets for nearly a year to spare her boyfriend grief? That each smile she had for Black was scorn? That each friendly word was a lie? That Black was just waiting for a chance to get the upper hand of her again?

"So be it if it´s so important for you. But I´d really prefer Remus."

"That´s my girl," James beamed and kissed her.

-x-

Mrs Potter would have liked to go to Diagon Alley with Lily to find a wedding-dress but she had to admit that it was too risky. The woman looked very unhappy until the bride showed her the dress she had worn at Petunia´s wedding.

"I´ll change the color and it will be OK, I guess" said Lily.

"Try it on, dear!" demanded Mrs Potter.

Lily did and Mrs Potter clapped her hands. "You look gorgeous. A pity you can´t marry in green. James would love this!"

Lily smiled. She waved her wand and the dress changed to white.

"Oh my god!" Mrs Potter had to sit down. "That´s wonderful! If I may, I´ll go to London and buy a bridal veil for you! Or no, wait!"

She rushed from the room and returned some minutes later with a box which she set carefully on the bed. She opened it. A very old veil made of lace lay in it. "My grandmother made this for my wedding," she said.

"It´s beautiful," Lily barely dared touch it.

"Something borrowed," Mrs Potter smiled. "The dress is old but its color is new. So we need something blue and it´s perfect."

Lily grinned. "You won´t get me a blue garter, will you?"

"That´s a brilliant idea!" cried Mrs Potter. "I was thinking of a necklace with a blue stone but it won´t go well with your eyes."

"Please, mum, don´t. That´s trashy!"

"It´s not. Jamie will love it!"

Lily smiled. She doubted whether James cared of her garter´s color at all.

-x-

The 31st of August was bright and sunny. Black gave Lily a card in the morning. It was from James, saying that he was taking breakfast in his room as he was not supposed to see his bride before the wedding and wishing her a very happy birthday and promising her a birthday present for later.

"He talked about me delivering a birthday kiss to you," grinned Black. "But I managed to talk him out of that."

"Thanks, that was very circumspect of you."

"However, happy birthday from me, too." Black handed her a small parcel wrapped in gift paper which held most predictably a box of marzipan sweets.

-x-

Soon the first guests arrived. Alice and Frank were the very first to show up. Alice left Frank in the garden with the Potter men and went upstairs.

"Hello, Mrs Potter," she greeted cheerfully. "I´ve come to relieve you."

"That´s very kind of you! I need to look after the guests and the bride will rather have a friend of her age with her than her mother in law!"

Alice hugged Lily as soon as Mrs Potter had left. "Are you nervous, dear?" she asked.

"A bit," Lily admitted.

"No need to be. Come I´ll help you with your hair. What do you want to do with it?"

"I thought I´ll wear it open. It will look nice with the veil."

"Let´s try."

Alice combed Lily´s hair and fastened the veil to it. Lily eyed her mirror image critically. "Not bad, but I think we should put back some strands. What do you say?"

"That´s exactly what I thought," agreed Alice. "Do you have a hair-slide?"

"Some. Over there in the casket."

Alice rummaged in the casket and finally produced a slide with little white flowers. "That´s perfect!" she exclaimed.

"It´s not. Please put it back," said Lily. "It would be very inappropriate if I wear that."

Alice frowned. "What is it? A token of love from a rival he doesn´t know of? You naughty girl!" she wagged her finger at Lily. "You´re going to take a vow to be his for the rest of your life in less than an hour. You can´t keep little love secrets in your casket!"

"It´s from my brother," said Lily. "We´re not on speaking terms. It hurts to see it."

"From your brother. So it´s harmless. You won´t see it when it´s on your head and you´ll look stunning for your husband."

"Breathtaking," whispered Lily. "The word has to be breathtaking."

Alice giggled. "Breathtaking, if you prefer that."

-x-

"Are you ready?" Mrs Potter peaked in through a small gap. "Everbody else is!"

"Yes, just a moment!" Lily cried. For a last time she checked her reflection in the mirror.

"You do look breathtaking," Alice reassured her softly.

"Let´s go," said Lily happily.

-x-

The garden looked like a muggle fairy tale. The guests sat under a light blue canopy on white chairs which were decorated with white roses and lilies.

James and the minister waited for Lily in a white pavilion. Behind James stood his best man and beamed at the bride as happily as the groom.

Lily smiled. James had tried to tame his hair. He looked unfamiliar with his neat hair style.

Lily didn´t hear much of the minister´s speech for all she could do was look into James´s warm hazel eyes.

Seemingly James didn´t listen either for Black had to lean forward and stage whisper "The vow, James!" The assembly chuckled.

James started and with an apologetic smile promised to love and hold his wife for the rest of his life.

Lily said her vow and rings were exchanged.

The minister pronounced them husband and wife and encouraged them to exchange their first married kiss.

James embraced his wife and kissed her passionately until his best man informed him in a mock whisper that this would do for the moment.

-x-

Mr Potter transfigured the canopy into a party tent. Mrs Potter conjured the cold buffet. The pavilion became a dance floor and the musicians started to play.

"The bride and bride-groom are the first to dance!" Mr Potter reminded his son. James offered Lily his arm and led her to the dance floor.

The musicians played a romantic waltz and they started to dance. Lily slid her fingers into James´s hair and rumpled it up. "That´s better," she smiled.

"I thought you didn´t like that," James teased.

"Maybe I got used to it," Lily suggested happily.

After a little while Black and Alice came and asked them for their share of the dance. James let go of Lily only reluctantly.

"I´ll bring her back," Black promised. "No need to look at me like that!"

He waltzed away with Lily while James danced with Alice. Slowly the dance floor got more crowded as the Prewitts led their dates there and even Mr and Mrs Potter joined the dancers.

"Smile, Evans," Black reminded Lily. "It´s supposed to be the happiest day of your life."

"It is," replied Lily, "though not exactly this moment."

"Oh come on," sighed Black. "How long will you hold it against me that I gave you a start with James. You are happy. I was right about you two."

"You were. But this does not imply that you were right about me and Severus."

"You´re not mourning for your sandbox love on your wedding day, are you? James does not deserve this!"

"I´m not. But the good result of your actions will not make me forget your bad intentions. You bear that in mind!"

The piece of music ended and Lily hurried away from Black to the buffet.

-x-

"You´re still mad at Sirius?" asked Remus and handed Lily a glass of champagne.

"I can´t help it, I don´t like him. Even if he´s James´s best friend. I hate the very sight of him."

"He gave you a hard time at Hogwarts now and then. It seems you´re not forgiving easily."

Lily smiled feebly. She couldn´t tell Remus how bad a time Black had given her.

"Will you grant me a dance with the bride?" Remus asked politely.

Lily set down her glass and followed him to the dance floor. Dancing with Remus was far more pleasant than with Black.

"May I ask you something?" she asked while they were enjoying their waltz.

Remus nodded. "Go ahead."

"I recently found out about Prongs and Padfoot. I wanted to ask you about Moony." Lily knew immediately that she had asked the wrong thing for Remus´s face turned ashen in an instant.

"Not here," he said pleadingly and led Lily away from the dance floor to the pond.

"Who told you?" he asked.

"Who told me what? I was told to ask you!" Lily had no idea what this was about.

"I´ll leave, of course."

"What are you talking about? What did I say?"

"You asked about Moony. I´ll leave. I understand that no bride wants a werewolf to roam her wedding party." He turned on the spot and strode towards the house.

A werewolf? The pieces fell into place. That was why he had missed so many classes. That was why James had checked the moon calendar before appointing a day for the wedding.

"Remus!" Lily hurried after him and caught his sleeve before he reached the party.

"You´re right," she said solemnly, "I don´t want a werewolf to roam my party. I´d prefer him to finish the dance with me. Will you kindly lead me back on the dance floor, please?"

Remus looked surprised. Then he smiled and offered Lily his arm. "You don´t mind?" he whispered when they had resumed dancing.

"Not as long as you don´t expect me to join you at the full moon," Lily whispered back. She smiled. Remus´s eyes held a warmth which hadn´t been there some minutes before.

-x-

Lily found the wedding party a bit disappointing. She had thought she would enjoy the day with James but she barely saw him. Every male guest wanted to enjoy the privilege to dance with the bride and Lily had to oblige. James on the other hand danced the whole time but not with his newly wed wife. His mother had informed him that it would be considered impolite if he didn´t dance with every female present at the party and so he was occupied more than he could wish for.

They met at the buffet in the late afternoon for some minutes. "How are you, sweetheart?" James asked softly.

"My feet are killing me, but apart from that I´m fine." Lily said in a low voice.

"Dancing the whole day is exhausting, isn´t it?"

"That´s not the problem. Some men seem to think dancing involves stepping on my feet as an obligatory task. I can tell you, dancing with Pettigrew is hell."

"I promise not to step on your feet if you dance with me," James suggested in a whisper.

"I really could do with a break in your arms," Lily replied. "Just let me get a quick bite before."

James chuckled. "Did you try the salmon?"

Lily took a small salmon sandwich from his plate. She was just about to point out how delicious it was when Albus Dumbledore himself asked her for the next dance.

Lily took his offered arm and followed him to the dance floor.

-x-

"I´m missing your brother, Miss Evans," the professor started conversation after some beats. "Oh, forgive me, it´s Mrs Potter now."

"It sounds unfamiliar," smiled Lily. "Severus and I are not on speaking terms."

"I´m surprised to hear that seeing your patronus."

"My patronus, Sir?"

"A creature considered dark by many, but harmless and highly useful at a closer view. I thought of your brother at once when I saw it."

"But you said it was because of potions."

"I wasn´t sure whether Masters Potter and Black knew about your relationship to Master Snape. And I knew the two of you always kept your friendship secret at Hogwarts."

"That was very circumspect of you, professor. They know that he´s my brother. But I´d appreciate it if you´d keep your interpretation of my patronus secret. James would be hurt if he had to think my brother was more important to me than he."

"We´ll stick to the potions explanation," Dumbledore promised.

-x-

"What were you talking about?" asked James when Lily rejoined him after the dance. "You looked sad."

"The professor asked why my brother wasn´t here."

"He knows about Snape being your brother?"

"It was his idea. He helped my parents get custody."

"I´m sorry your siblings didn´t come. I wrote letters to both of them, pointing out how important their presence was to us, but neither even answered the letter."

"Petunia is afraid of owls. And you wrote a letter to Severus inviting him to our wedding?"

"I thought he´d end your row if he knew I wasn´t toying around with you. That was his concern, wasn´t it?"

Lily didn´t know whether to laugh or to cry. Sweet James invited his rival to the wedding. Poor Severus. The letter must have seemed like his rival´s mock of his defeat. On the other hand he probably didn´t care at all. He´d stopped caring last autumn. The letter can´t have hurt him.

"Will you dance with me now," she asked James.

"It will be my pleasure," James led her to the dance floor and signalled to the band that he wanted a slow piece of music.

Lily rested her head against his shoulder while they danced. Dancing with James was relaxing. "Do you think it´s OK if we sit down for some minutes?" Lily asked after a while. "I´m dead tired. I never knew getting married was so exhausting."

-x-

In the evening torches were lit to illuminate the garden. Some of the guests had already left and those remaining were enjoying a dance with their partners or dates.

James had conjured a chair for Lily from where she watched the dancers happily. "What do you think, dear," he asked. "Shall we retire? I don´t think we´ll be missed."

"This would be great. I´m tired as never before in my life."

James offered Lily his arm and led her into the house. "Just a second," Lily moaned as soon as the door closed on them. She bent down and took off her shoes. "That´s better."

James grinned. "I´d never have guessed that you´d start to get undressed downstairs," he teased.

Lily giggled and hit him with her shoes softly. "I´m not getting undressed. My feet are killing me. I told you hours ago."

"I´ll do a little healing chant for you upstairs," James promised.

"I´d rather have you help me get out of this dress. Your mum fixed some of the buttons on my back with safety-pins and I can´t reach them."

"Help you out of your dress? I think we can arrange that." James laughed.

Lily giggled and followed her husband upstairs.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31: Winning and Losing

It was well after lunchtime when Lily and James came to the kitchen the next day. Black and the Potters were sitting by the kitchen table chatting happily about the wedding. On the table stood what was left from the buffet and the wedding cake. Everybody had a used plate in front of him or her.

"Finally," cried Mrs Potter. "We thought you were going to stay up there all day. What can I get you? Coffee, tea? Or will you rather have lunch than breakfast?"

"I´ll have a cup of coffee, please," said Lily and sat down.

Black moved a bit to make room for James to sit beside her. "You look tired, pal. Being married must be exhausting," he remarked with a grin and a glance at Lily.

James blushed.

"You dance all day without having a break and we´ll see how you look," Lily shot at Black. "Thanks, mum." She took a sip of coffee.

"Jamie, coffee or tea?"

"Coffee, please, and I´ll have some of those salmon sandwiches."

Mrs Potter placed a cup and a plate in front of her son.

"So," said Black when James had loaded his plate with delicacies from the platter in the middle of the table. "Tell me, what is it like to be married?"

"Pleasant," replied James. "Very pleasant."

"Is it?" Black glanced at Lily again with a grin.

"For further details find a girl and try it yourself," Lily suggested with a sweet smile.

"We can discuss this in private later," Black whispered to James.

Lily leaned a bit towards her husband and whispered into his other ear. "If you do, pleasantness will end here and now."

Mr Potter had followed the exchange in silence so far. "If I may give you an advice, son, from one married man to the other, obey your wife. Your friend will forgive you more easily." He laughed and dodged his wife´s hand.

"Oh you!" Mrs Potter cried with mock rage and kissed her husband on the cheek.

"Evans, you are a spoilsport. You don´t allow me a tiny share of the fun." Black complained.

Lily glared at him. "You´re not part of the fun. The fun is only for two. James is one of them . It´s his decision who´s to be the second." She got up. "I´m still tired. Forgive me, but I think I´ll have another nap."

She took her cup of coffee with her and went upstairs. A pleased smile crossed her face when she heard James come after her only seconds later.

-x-

She waited for James right behind the door of their room – it was still hard to think of it as their room for it had been hers for months.

"Put that tray down!" she ordered when he entered.

James obeyed. Lily fell on his neck and kissed him.

"You were pretty rude to Sirius," said James when they had a picnic on the bed a little later. He had brought sandwiches and coffee for both of them.

"He was tactless. How is it to be married? Give me a break! What was he expecting? A detailed description of our wedding-night?" Lily was furious.

"He just wanted to be polite. He wanted to show his interest."

"His interest? This is none of his business. His interest is neither expected nor welcome!"

"He´s my best friend!"

"And I´m your wife. There´s only room for two in this marriage. If you take him in, I´m going to take myself out."

"So I finally have to choose between you and him."

"I guess so. But only concerning your nights. You can have a wife and a best friend by day. But by night..." she shrugged.

"So if I kiss you now, I can tell him?" teased James.

"You!" Lily cried and hit James with a pillow. James put the tray on his bedside table before he retaliated. Soon they were in the middle of a fierce pillow-fight. Both laughed and giggled. At last James confessed defeat.

-x-

Lily enjoyed most of the next months. James fulfilled her every wish and his parents couldn´t have loved a daughter more. The only thorn in her sides was Black.

They got along well when they were practicing spells for the order, but most of the time Lily had to concur with him for James´s attention. Several times Black had disturbed them when they had found themselves a quiet place in the garden to enjoy each other´s company.

"I´m not asking too much!" Lily raged one evening while she was getting ready to go to bed. "Why can´t he leave us alone for an hour or two?"

"He apologized," James pointed out and looked up from the book he was reading.

"He apologized. He did every time. When he disturbed us kissing by the pond. When he caught you with your hands... well, you remember. When you massaged my shoulders by the oak tree." Lily ticked them off on her fingers. "And today! Every idiot could have seen from a distance that this was not just a quick hug. Why couldn´t he just turn around and go back to the house? No! He had to come all the way down to the pond to apologize for disturbing us!"

James put the book on his bedside table and placed his glasses on top of it. "What do you want?" he sighed. "Shall I talk to him?"

"I want a house where we are undisturbed. I want a house were Black doesn´t live. Either we move out or he does."

"I can´t leave my parents. Not with mum´s fragile health. And I can´t ask Sirius to move out. This has been his home for years."

"So as there´s no other option left, you choose to torture your wife."

"I´m not torturing you." James stretched out his arm invitingly. "Come here and relax."

"I can´t. This situation is driving me crazy."

"I´ll talk to Sirius. I´m sure he´ll grant us more privacy."

Lily crawled under her blanket, she put out the light and turned her back on James. In the dark her husband touched her shoulder gently. "You want me to massage your shoulders?" he asked softly.

"No," Lily refused. "I have a headache. I´ll try to sleep."

"Poor you," whispered James and stroked her hair, "sleep well."

"You, too."

Lily lay awake for nearly three hours while James gently snored beside her. She´d never have guessed she´d miss him so much so soon.

-x-

It took James some time to realize something was wrong. He pitied Lily in the morning when she was grumpy and claimed she still had her headache. He even blamed the headache when she refused to kiss him after combat practice although she had just fought him and Black in turn for nearly three hours without complaining about a headache.

He got suspicious when she offered him her cheek to kiss when he asked for a ´dessert´ after supper and he was furious when his wife went to bed and turned her back on him again in the evening.

"Are you trying to manipulate me?" he asked and turned the light back on.

Lily didn´t answer.

"Tell me I´m mistaken!" James demanded. "Tell me you were not thinking of punishing me with ignorance until I throw Sirius out of the house!"

Lily sat up and faced her husband. "You´re right! I was going to manipulate you. It was my only choice as you refuse to be reasonable. You´re not going to act until he catches us in the middle of..." Lily was fuming. "I´m only making sure this will not happen."

James stared at his wife in disbelief. "You´re what? He won´t burst into this room!"

"How can you be sure? He´s bursting in everywhere else!"

"I will not be blackmailed," hissed James. "You don´t want to be caught kissing me? You can have that." He lay down, turned his back on Lily and put out the light.

"Fine!" Lily spat and lay down turning her back on her husband.

-x-

"Well," said Black at breakfast some days later, "what is this about? I mean, nobody expected your honeymoon to last forever but you haven´t been seen kissing for more than fifty hours. That´s not normal."

"It´s nothing," said James and buttered another piece of toast.

Lily glared at him.

"Nothing? In that case I don´t want to see you two having a row."

"I wouldn´t want you to see either," snapped Lily and got up. "I´m watering the herb patch in case anyone wants to know."

-x-

"Evans," Black said softly behind her half an hour later. "May I talk to you?"

Lily shrugged. "You do your talking while I´m working in my patch. I´ll listen."

"It´s not fair what you´ve been doing to James."

"Is it? Did he complain?"

"No! I guessed and he´s a bad liar."

"So?"

"I´ll find myself a house. My uncle gave me some money. You´ve your wish. I´m out of James´s life. Just one last thing: you´d never have won this battle. James is a loyal friend and he hates being manipulated. He´d never have given way. Don´t try this again or you´ll lose him."

Lily faced Black for the first time. "So why are you moving out if he didn´t give way?"

"I´m as loyal as he is. Believe it or not. I won´t let him choose me over you when I see how unhappy it makes him." Black turned and headed for the house.

"Black!" Lily called after him.

"Yes?" he turned.

"I don´t want you out of James´s life. I just want you out of our marriage. Believe it or not, I won´t let him choose me over you either when I see it makes him unhappy. I can´t live under one roof with you. Too much has happened. But I suppose I can cope with you visiting. If it makes James happy."

Black smiled. "Thank you, Evans. You´d better go now and make things up with your husband."

Lily smiled, too. "I will. Thanks for the advice." She wiped her hands and set out for the house.

"I guess you´d like me to stay outside for some time," Black called after her.

"That´s kind! Thank you!" Lily called back and entered the house.

-x-

James sat by the kitchen table. "So are you content now? My best friend is leaving. You have me all for yourself now."

"And this will be pure pleasure, by the looks of it." Lily sat down on the table beside James´s plate.

James looked up at her, furious. "You don´t want to understand, do you? You cost me my friend!"

Lily leaned forward to kiss him but James leaned back and she couldn´t reach him. "You don´t honestly think you can do that and then make up by kissing me."

"No, I thought it would need some more than a kiss to make things up," Lily teased.

James stared at her in disbelief. "You must be mental. By the way, don´t you fear Sirius might burst in?"

"No," Lily laughed. "He promised to stay in the garden after I invited him to visit."

"You invited him to visit us?" James was dumbfounded.

"Of course, silly. I don´t want you to lose your best friend. I just can´t stand living with him in the same house."

"You´re unbelievable, you know that?"

"A certain somebody hinted it one or two times. Will I get my kiss now?"

"It will take more than a kiss to make things up." James reminded her.

"But we have to start somewhere, don´t we?"

They started with a kiss.

-x-

Black found himself a small house within a week. Remus and Pettigrew turned up to help him move his things. Lily and James helped as well and so the whole move was done in one day.

The Potters invited him warmly to come to dinner on weekends. Black accepted the offer gratefully but added that he´d rather give a housewarming party the following weekend.

-x-

James, his parents and Lily arrived late at Black´s house. Mrs Potter hadn´t felt well in the morning and they hadn´t been sure she would be able to come. Lily had made her a strenghtening potion. Potter senior had let her use his lab and had followed her every step with critical eyes. When she had finished her work, he had taken the goblet upstairs to his wife while Lily had tidied up her workshop place.

"You know," Harold Potter had said when she came up to the kitchen. "I think we should talk about you entering my business when we´re back."

His business? Lily had no idea what that was. She had had no time to ask because her mother in law came downstairs and pronounced that she was ready to go to Black´s party.

Black had decorated the front door with a ´Welcome´ sign. The crowd of guests was small. There were Remus and Pettigrew, Alice and Frank and a young girl, Pamela.

Lily was surprised. She had had no idea that Black had a girlfriend. That was if Pamela was his girlfriend.

Black showed the Potters around in his new home. Having helped with the move, James and Lily knew it already and stayed at the small living room with the other guests.

Alice took Lily by her arm and pulled her to a corner of the room. "How did you do that? And so quickly!"

"What are you talking about?"

"You making Black move out."

"It was his own choice."

"Don´t tell me you didn´t encourage him."

"Maybe a bit," Lily grinned.

"You´ve won me a bet."

"What?"

"I had a bet with Frank that you´d get rid of Black before Christmas."

"How did you guess?"

"Come on, everybody but James knows you hate Black. You give it away in every training session. When you can get a clear shot at him, you hit him. Twice if you can."

Lily blushed.

"Oh, hi Pam!" Alice turned to the girl who had joined them quietly.

"Is this a private conversation?" Pamela asked shyly. "I don´t want to intrude."

"Don´t be foolish. We were just talking about our host. Did you already have the opportunity to talk to him?"

Pam shook her head and her long blonde hair dangled with the move. So she was not Black´s girlfriend. "He doesn´t seem interested in talking to me."

"And the others? What about the tall one, I think his name is Remus, isn´t it, Lily?"

"Yes, that´s Remus."

"He seemed rather refusing. I´ll get me a drink."

"Poor thing," said Alice when Pam had left. "She´s my cousin. I brought her because I thought she´d make contact with some nice young man here, but it seems not to work. She´s so shy. I hoped things would be easier at a private party."

Lily smiled feebly.

"No harm done," Alice went on cheerfully. "I´ll invite the Prewitt brothers for dinner next week."

-x-

Lily enjoyed the party very much for it marked the day when Sirius Black lost most of his influence upon her life. She wasn´t going to see him but on Sundays. The rest of the week she was free. And whatever he tried to plant in James´s head on a Sunday, she was confident she could get her husband to her side over the week.

They had supper in the garden. It was a cold buffet as no room in the house was big enough to seat all the guests. Alice tried once more to interest Black in her cousin but had to confess defeat in the end. Black was not interested.

In Lily´s opinion Pamela was lucky.

-x-

They returned home rather early for Mrs Potter needed to rest. Harold took her upstairs and joined his son and daughter in law in the living room shortly later.

"I was quite impressed how you made that potion in the morning, Lily." He said and sat down in one of the arm chairs. "I thought I saw the intuition I´m looking for in you when you studied for your NEWTs and I´m sure after I watched you today. I need someone to follow me in my business and it´s quite clear," he sighed, "that it can´t be Jamie. Don´t misunderstand me, son, you´re an able brewer but you don´t have what it takes to change a recipe, to experiment and explore. Lily has it."

Lily wasn´t sure what to say. "Harold," she finally asked, "what is your business?"

Harold was taken aback. "You didn´t tell her?"

James shook his head. "Lily never asked and I was glad I found someone who didn´t care."

Harold sighed. "Look, Lily. Our family is well known for our achievements in research. We experiment with potions. We look for old, forgotten magic. Sometimes we find something we can make money with. It´s very interesting work, but also difficult. You can´t just say ´I want to be an expert for experimental potion brewing´. You have to have it in you. I think you have it." He got up and fetched an album from the book shelf.

"This is what our family has done." He handed the album to Lily.

The girl opened it. There were newspaper cuttings and photos in it. The older ones showed men and women who looked vaguely familiar and then again not. The newer ones showed Harold and his wife. There were articles about discoveries. Seemingly Harold Potter had found a draught to heal hiccups. He had improved Veritaserum and found a way to extend the stability of various potions. Mrs Potter had discovered several old charms which could be used to improve racing brooms and a spell to make anticheating quills.

"We made quite a lot of money with that one," Harold explained when Lily read the cutting. "The ministry and several big wizarding schools bought the rights and the ministry paid us extra to sell the spell only to schools."

"I had no idea your family was famous, James," Lily said.

James grinned. "I wanted you to go for my good looks and my charm."

Lily chuckled and continued turning the pages of the album. "Do you really think I can do this, Harold?"

"I think it´s worth a try."

"But it really should be James who joins you."

"Rubbish. Jamie can be helpful in other ways. He can handle the business trips, look for old books and parchments, buy ingredients for us. It would be a great relief for me."

"This would be great," said James. "We could work together as a family. I´d really like that. Is this OK with you, dear? I know you were thinking of starting healer training."

"It would be wonderful!" agreed Lily happily. "I had no idea there were wizards exploring magic. It sounds like I can do all the things I like. Potions, charms, runes. That´s a great offer, Harold."

"So it´s settled. You two join the business. Jamie as business man and Lily as experimentator."

-x-

The next weeks were wonderful. Lily spent weekdays in the lab with Harold. The evenings were reserved for James, who was apparating to different parts of the country every day.

In the beginning Lily had been nervous because this was against Alastor´s ´don´t go out in public´ advice, but then again the incident at the lake had happened nearly half a year ago and no deatheater had tried to get near them. Moreover Lily guessed there was no way to find out in advance where James would be going the next day. After some days she calmed down as her husband seemed to be quite safe.

Black came to dinner every Sunday. He and Lily met each other with politeness. Black brought his usual token of peace, a box of marzipan sweets, every week and Lily accepted it with a smile. As she had to endure his presence only for some hours, it was easy for Lily to put a good face upon it.

She found it a bit annoying though that he started asking about when the first baby was due. James blushed every time Black asked but Lily thought of the little vial on her bedside table and smiled mysteriously.

-x-

Fate struck two days before Christmas. Harold Potter went to bed in the evening and didn´t wake up the next morning. His wife was overwhelmed with grief and had to go to St. Mungo´s again. James and Lily were shocked.

They had feared for Mrs Potter´s health for some time but neither of them had thought that it would be her husband to leave them first.

The worst thing was that they had no time to mourn. The funeral had to be organized. Work in the lab could not be delayed. Harold and Lily had some cauldrons of potions bubbling which needed attending to. Not finishing the brewing seemed like betraying Harold´s trust. James had some appointments with customers and a house clearance in Ireland which promised to bring some very old books into their possession.

Lily sent a patronus message to Black. She never had guessed she ever would but they needed help and James hadn´t yet mastered conjuring a messenger patronus. Black turned up less than ten minutes later with Remus. Pettigrew followed half an hour later.

Once more Lily had to admit that Black´s organizing skills were astonishing. He distributed tasks quickly but well-devised. James and Remus were to go to the house clearance. As soon as the deal was perfect, James was to go on to his other appointments and Remus was to move the purchases home. Pettigrew was to organize the funeral. Black was going to help him after he returned from the hospital. Lily´s task was the lab work for she was the only one who could do it properly.

When the five met again in the evening everything was settled. The funeral was organized, Black brought information on Mrs Potter´s health (due to medication she´d be able to attend the funeral), James had visited all customers, Remus had brought back some very promising books from Ireland and Lily had a set of ready potions which she could analyse some days later.

Black helped James take his mother home from hospital the next day. Remus and Pettigrew helped Lily prepare a reception for the funeral guests and send invitations.

The funeral itself was modest with only few guests as they had decided to have it before Christmas.

-x-

James invited his friends to stay over Christmas and all three accepted the invitation though Black did only after asking whether it was OK with Lily. The girl agreed to have him in the house as he had been very helpful and spending Christmas alone after the past events seemed a bad idea anyway. Filling the house with guests promised to be distracting.

Mrs Potter got up only some hours a day. As nobody felt like celebrating they didn´t even put up a Christmas tree.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32: Working for the Order

Albus Dumbledore called on New Years day. He spent some minutes with Mrs Potter first before he gathered the young couple and their guests in the living room.

"I´m very sorry to intrude on you in this period of mourning but this can´t be postponed," he started. "First of all I´d like to know if these young friends of yours would like to join a secret organization to fight the dark side. In case the answer is no I´ll ask you to kindly leave until we´re finished."

Remus agreed to join at once. "Fight the dark side?" he said, "I´ve been asking myself what I can do."

Pettigrew glanced at Black first. He had always followed his lead at Hogwarts. When he became aware that Black was already a member, he agreed to join, too.

Dumbledore explained about the order and the two would receive training lessons before being assigned to a task. Then he turned to Lily. "It´s your help I need today, Lily," he said and produced a small vial from his pocket. "Though he never was a member of the Order, Harold analysed potions for us from time to time. I need an analysis of this and I need it quickly."

Lily took the vial with a nod. "Tell me everything you know about it."

"Alastor collected this sample at a house in Wales. He came too late to save the family. They were dead, aparently poisoned. This vial holds what was on their plates. Some soup, onion from the smell, and hopefully the poison which was used. Alastor couldn´t tell from the appearance of the bodies which poison it is. Rumor has it Voldemort found himself a new potions master and an excellent one. James that is were you come in. Through your business you have contact to many potion experts. I want you to listen closely to what they say. We need to find out who the new poison expert for the dark side is."

Lily got up with the vial in her hand. "I´ll start at once," she said. "If we´re lucky I´ll be able to give you first information in two or three hours. Do you want to wait?"

"If it´s no burden to you."

"Not at all, James you´ll have to make supper."

Lily went down to the cellar with the vial.

-x-

She came back upstairs about one hour later with a small roll of parchment. "I need these," she told James and handed him the list.

James unrolled and read it. "Where do you think I´ll get dragon claw from on New Years Day?" he stared at Lily in disbelief.

"That´s not my problem, honey. I´m only brewing." Lily placed a light kiss on her husband´s cheek.

"I can get the rest, but not dragon claw. Sorry."

"I need it. This poison is a sophisticated brew. I think I identified the ingredients, but it´s not a simple decoction. It has been boiled down and they must have done something with the stiring. I can´t find out without dragon claw."

Dumbledore rose to his feet. "I might be able to get you dragon claw. James, you get the rest."

James rose, too, and off they were.

Lily got her ingredients two hours later. In the meantime she made a stew for supper. Remus helped in the kitchen while Black and Pettigrew stayed at the living room, where Black answered Pettigrew´s eager questions about the Order.

-x-

After a quick meal Lily went back to the lab. Dumbledore worked with the boys on their patronuses. The spell was new for Remus and Pettigrew. James´s patronus was stable and clearly recognizable as a cat but refused to work as a messenger. Black didn´t need help as he had managed to use his stag as a messenger before. So he spent most of the time waiting for James´s cat to deliver a message to him.

Lily returned to the living room hours later. She sat down and handed Dumbledore who sat beside her a sheet of parchment. "These are the ingredients and the methods of brewing in my opinion. I´m doing a test concerning the temperatur of boiling it down, but this will take some days. I´ll inform you when it´s finished."

Dumbledore read the parchment and frowned. "That´s complicated. Who could have done it?"

Lily shrugged. "Not many that I know of. I could have done it. Professor Slughorn. My brother. Harold. But I have no idea how many of Harold´s partners have the ability to do it. There could be hundreds out there."

"Your brother?" Dumbledore said pensively. "Do you think...?"

"No!" Lily cried. "Not for one moment. You asked who could have done it, not who I thought did it."

"Lily, I want you to contact him to make sure."

"That´s a bad idea, Sir."

"I want you to try."

Lily sighed. "I´ll try."

-x-

"I don´t want you to do it," said James as soon as Dumbledore had left. "My wife will not meet a potentially dangerous person."

"Potentially dangerous? We´re speaking about my brother!"

"Dumbledore wants you to find out whether he´s a Death Eater!"

"Even Dumbledore thinks the answer is no! I´m supposed to make sure!"

"What if Dumbledore is wrong?"

Lily and James glared at each other like fighting cocks.

"Stop it!" Black stepped between them. "We don´t even know whether he will agree to speak to Lily!"

"That´s right," James calmed down. "Probably he will not even speak to you."

Lily gave it a thought. "He will not come to speak to me. You´re right. I tried that before." She bit her lip. "But he may come for a mystery."

"What?"

"Severus is a passionate potion brewer and I have a potion which holds some mysteries. He won´t be able to resist, I hope."

"You think this will work?" James sounded unconvinced.

"It´s the best plan I can think of."

"How will you contact him?"

"A letter?"

"You have an address?"

"He´ll be at home, I assume."

"You know where he lives?" Black asked.

"Of course I know where my brother lives. James can you get me D´Artagnan while I write my letter?"

"I will get your owl when I know what´s in this letter. You will not go to his house."

"He will not come to your house."

"What about a neutral meeting point?" Remus interjected. "A public place. A pub or a café?"

"That´s a good idea," James agreed. "And I´ll come with you."

"What a great idea, sweetheart," Lily teased. "You´re the reason for our difference. He´ll turn on the spot when he sees you."

"She´s right, Prongs," Black pointed out.

"I don´t want my wife to go alone and unprotected!"

"Unprotected? I´ll take my wand!" Lily protested.

"I´ll go with Lily," Black offered.

"Wonderful!" Lily spat. "If there´s one person in the world he hates more than James, it´s you."

James stood his ground. "You will not go alone!"

Lily sighed. "OK, Remus, will you go with me?"

Remus hesitated. "I´m not sure he will stay if he sees me."

"You could stay in the background." Lily looked at Remus pleadingly. Please, don´t make me take Pettigrew with me!

"What day are you going to meet him?" Remus asked. "It´s the full moon next week."

Lily did some quick thinking. "If he´s at home – and this will not work at all if he isn´t – D´Artagnan can deliver my letter today. I´ll suggest to meet tomorrow. Don´t give him time to think about it and back away."

"In this case I´ll behonored to go with you," Remus smiled.

Lily gazed at him thankfully. "Will you now go for my owl?" she asked her husband. James sighed and left for the garden. Meanwhile Lily conjured parchment and quill and wrote her message to Severus.

-x-

The next morning James reminded Lily to be very cautious and Remus to look after his wife and bring her back well.

Lily and Remus apparated to London after breakfast and went to Fortescue´s. The ice-cream parlor was open in winter though it served more as a café at that time of the sat at a small table near the window and ordered hot chocolate. Remus chose a table in the background from where he had a good view of Lily´s position.

They waited for nearly an hour and Lily was ready to give up and return home when someone put down a goblet of mead beside her.

"Why did you summon me here?" asked Severus in a cool voice.

Lily looked up at him. He wore a black shirt, which would normally have suited him well, but now it only stressed his palor. His hair looked neglected and his eyes were cold and hollow. It was hard to believe that this was the boy who had spent these happy days in France with her less than two years ago.

"Please sit down," Lily said softly and forced herself to smile.

Severus obliged. "You brought a chaperone," he said nodding in Remus´s direction.

"James wouldn´t let me come alone." Lily knew immediately that mentioning James had been wrong for Severus got back up. "Please!" she touched his hand gently.

Severus tore away but sat back down. "He´s dangerous."

"Not today."

Severus looked surprised. He glared at Remus and repeated his first question:"Why did you summon me here?"

"I didn´t summon you. I asked your help, your expertise." Lily explained about having to analyse a potion but having some problems with it. She produced a piece of parchment from her pocket.

"Look," she said. "I think I know the ingredients and I have an idea how it may have been brewed." She slid the parchment over to Severus and observed him closely.

A muscle in his cheek twitched for a moment.

"I don´t see where you need my help. You´ve figured everything out."

"No, look. The data don´t fit. It seems as if someone has tempered with the brew."

Severus checked the parchment again. "I see what you mean. But why so much effort to analyse a sleeping draught?"

Lily laughed. It was a bitter sound. "A sleeping draught? Severus, this poison has been used to kill a family. Mother, father and three kids."

"Kill? Impossible. Look at the ingredients. You can´t brew a lethal poison of these. A sleeping draught, yes, though it wouldn´t be my first choice."

Lily frowned. "Why that?"

"The secondary effects. I can´t tell without testing but these herbs," he pointed at the ingredient list, "are not by chance rarely used together. This combination will cause severe secondary effects when combined with some other substances, some very common substances. Garlic is one, I guess."

"Or onion," added Lily. "What do you think: You take this sleeping draught and combine it with onion. Could this be lethal?"

Severus gave it some thinking. "No. Unless you boil the draught down to a very high concentration." He looked pensive.

"I thought the potion had been tempered with." Lily beamed. "not one potions master, but two. One artist who made the original harmless draught and someone who changed it to kill. Thanks for your help!"

Severus smiled feebly.

"What have you been doing?" Lily asked, trying to start a conversation. "Did you find a job?"

Severus´s smile faded. He drained his goblet and got ready to leave.

"Severus," Lily grabbed his hand. "Why can´t we be friends?"

Trapped by Lily´s grip, Severus sat back down. He hesitated. "Maybe," he said coldly, "because I have no reason to believe that your friendship is worth more than those words of love you whispered in my ear."

"What?" Lily was taken aback.

"I waited for you at home at Christmas. But you prefered snogging Potter."

"You waited for me? You gave me no reason to think you´d even let me into the house!"

"What? Why wouldn´t I let you into the house?"

"You were mean to me! I tried to talk to you but you were stubborn."

"I was mean to you?"

"Who said I ran from his arms to an other´s?" Lily hissed.

"And I was right, wasn´t I?" Severus´s voice was now as cold as ice. "You ran right from my arms to the rich boy´s. We have a word for women like you!"

"What do you mean by ´women like me´?"

Severus grabbed Lily´s hand with her wedding and engagement rings. "You must entertain him well, for I see he pays you well."

"How dare you!" Lily cried and freed her hand from Severus´s grip. People stared at them.

"Never summon me again." Severus got up.

"Not if my life depended on it."

Severus dropped some coins on the table and left without looking back.

-x-

Remus paid for his and Lily´s drinks and took the girl out of Fortescue´s.

"What did he say?" Remus asked as soon as they stepped out on the pavement. It was exactly the wrong question for Lily paled and tears filled her eyes.

"I want to go home," she whispered.

Remus linked his arm to Lily´s and led her back to the Leaky Cauldron and out on the street. Lily followed his lead as if in trance.

"We can apparate from here," said Remus when they entered a quiet side-street.

"What?" Lily hadn´t listened.

"Apparate!"

"Oh, yes, of course!"

"Leave it, I´ll take you side by side." Remus tightened his grip on Lily and turned on the spot.

A moment later they materialized near the Potter house. Black waited for them at the front door.

"Is she OK? Did he attack her?" he asked when he became aware that Lily was steered by Remus rather than she walked.

"No, but he said something to her. She´s on the edge of tears since then."

"What did he say?" Black helped Remus get Lily to the living room sofa.

"I didn´t hear, they hissed at each other in very low voices."

"Lily," Black sat beside the girl. "What did he say?"

"Where´s James?"

"He got an urgent message from a business partner. He´ll be back as quickly as he can. He took Wormtail to help him."

"I´ll make you a cup of tea," said Remus and left for the kitchen.

"What did he say? Is he a Death Eater? Is that why you´re so shocked?"

Lily shook her head.

"Come on, don´t let me guess every word! What happened?"

"He said I married James for his money. How could he!" Lily couldn´t hold back her tears any longer.

Black lay an arm around Lily´s shoulder and stroked her hair. "We all know this is not true," he said softly and offered the girl a handkerchief. "I told you he wasn´t good for you from the beginning."

"You were right," Lily sobbed. "How come you were the only one to see his true colors?" She rested her head against Black´s shoulder.

"Well, I´m sure you heard the rumors. My family has an affinity to the dark arts. I grew up surrounded by them. Maybe that´s why I recognize the dark when I meet it."

"But he was so nice then."

"Only as long as you did what he wanted. He showed his true colors when you started freeing yourself from him."

Lily sobbed. She couldn´t believe it. Black continued stroking her hair and she was glad he was there. She wouldn´t have thought this possible some hours ago.

Remus returned after a while with a cup of tea which Lily accepted gratefully.

"Did you find out what upset her so much?" he asked Black and sat down on Lily´s other side.

"He insulted her personally."

"Oh no. How can he! He´s your brother after all."

Lily wiped her tears and took a sip of tea. "He is," she said in barely a whisper, "he still disapproves of my marriage with James. He said I married James because of his money."

"Rubbish!" cried Remus. "He´d know it´s not true had he ever seen you two together."

"Thank you, Remus," Lily smiled feebly. "I´ll make lunch now." She got up.

"I can do that," offered Remus.

"No, thank you. The work will distract me."

-x-

Preparing the meal did the trick. Lily calmed down a bit.

"Could you carry this up to mum?" she asked Black. "I don´t want her to see my red eyes."

He took the tray upstairs while Lily and Remus layed the table. James came home shortly after they had finished eating.

"I hurried as much as possible, Peter can do the rest" he explained. "What happened? You look dreadful, dear."

Lily reported how Severus had helped her with the potion. "Then I tried to find out what he´s doing, for whom he´s working. But he..." she hesitated. "...he wouldn´t tell. Instead he said some mean things about me and you."

"Mean things?"

"I´d rather not repeat them."

"He made my wife cry by the look of your face. I want to know what he said!"

"I hurt him first. It´s OK."

"What are you talking about? All you did is marry me! You won´t count that as an apology for his behaviour! Our marriage is no offence!"

"In his eyes it is."

"You can´t be serious! He can´t expect us to apologize for being happy!"

"He doesn´t. And I´m not trying to find excuses for him. I just try to see his point of view."

"His point of view? Are you mental, woman?" James was furious.

"We have to inform Dumbledore," Black changed topic just in time to avoid a major row.

The others agreed. As she had been given the task of investigating about Severus, Lily drew her wand to send a message to the professor. It came as a bad surprise that she was not able to conjure a patronus.

-x-

Albus Dumbledore came less than an hour after Black had sent his he heard that Lily had lost her patronus he insisted on talking to her alone. James left the room only reluctantly.

"What happened?" the professor asked softly.

"I thought I´d hook him with the potion. It worked in the beginning," Lily explained.

"Did he recognize the recipe? Is he the Dark Lord´s potions master?" Dumbledore asked eagerly.

"No, he thought it was a sleeping draught."

"Could that be?"

"Strangely enough, yes. We discussed the matter and we think, I think, someone brewed a sophisticated sleeping draught. A second person, not necessarily equally skilled in brewing, boilded it down until its concentration was high enough to kill in combination with certain substances. Onion for example."

"Why would someone brew a complicated sleeping draught, which can be turned into a lethal weapon?"

"I thought about it. This draught would taste a bit sweet. I´d make it for kids. Though I can´t think of a reason to give sleeping draught to children."

"What happened then?"

"I asked him about his job and why we can´t be friends. His answer was insulting."

"What did he say?"

"Why can´t anyone be content with the fact that I felt insulted? Why do I have to repeat it all over?" Lily snapped.

"Lily, I´m trying to figure out what to do about your patronus."

Lily blushed. "I´m sorry, professor. I didn´t mean to be touchy."

Dumbledore smiled. "No need to apologize. I understand it is not easy to repeat what Severus said. You trusted him and he hurt you. What did he say?"

"He said that I married James for undecent reasons. He hinted my motive was money." Lily hesitated. Dumbledore waited patiently for the girl to continue. "He thinks of James as an enemy. I married the enemy. This must have hurt him so much. Maybe he thought he´d hurt me first this time, before I could hurt him again. Does this make sense, professor?"

Dumbledore smiled. "Perfectly. Your patronus will return in a short time. You love your brother. You´re already making excuses for him. You´ll forgive him and your patronus will return." He got up. "Well, I have to return to Hogwarts. Thank you for the information. Tell James to keep an ear open. We need to know who brews the potions for the other side."

Lily was very pensive when the professor had left. What did Dumbledore know about her love for Severus? Was he aware that it had not been sisterly all the time? She sighed. If he was, she´d have to rely on his keeping this secret as well as the true meaning of her patronus bat.


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33: Narrow Escapes

The professor was right. Lily´s patronus bat returned after some days, solid and strong as ever. Lily was glad it was still a bat. So she had been able to forgive Severus. That was good. He was her brother after all. The girl couldn´t explain why, but making things up with him was more important for her than with Petunia. She could only guess that the reason was that Petunia had been refusing her all her life while the difference with Severus was new.

James was convinced that the return of Lily´s patronus was his merit, for he had done anything to comfort his wife and make her forget what happened at Fortescue´s.

Remus and Pettigrew were around more often as James and Black – Lily started thinking about him as Sirius – had volunteered to practice dueling with them. The Longbottoms called in the evenings to help. Lily liked those visits for they were her only chance to speak to a female who was not old enough to be her mother.

Alice obviously enjoyed their chats, too, for she usually left the men after helping Frank demonstrate new moves or spells to join Lily in the lab or kitchen.

"Frank´s mum starts pestering us about a grand-child," she sighed while she was watching Lily add different amounts of dragon blood to potion samples. "Can you imagine a pregnant auror? I´d be useless. I can´t go to work while with child. Frank would spend his time protecting me instead of fighting the dark."

"If you ever want children, you´ll have no choice than to be a pregnant auror. Aren´t there desk jobs in the Auror office?"

"There are. But I´m not ready to take one. Not yet. Just don´t tell Augusta. She´s not come up with that idea yet."

Lily laughed. "Your secret is safe. I won´t tell her."

"What about your mother in law? Isn´t she longing for a grand-child? A little Harold after her husband´s death?"

"Luckily not! I´m only eighteen. I don´t think I´ll have children in the next twenty years."

"Will she be ready to wait that long? And even more important: will James?"

"James? No problem. He was a late child himself. His parents were nearly eighty when he was born." Lily giggled. "Nearly eighty. Any muggle doctor would faint."

Alice giggled, too. "You´re lucky. Though eighty seems a bit late to me as well. What are you trying to achieve with these potions?"

"I´m trying to brew up sort of an emergency antidote. The dark side has been using poisons frequently and we can´t have every auror and member of the order carry around a sack of bezoars. If I succeed with this we may be able to buy us some hours to come up with a proper antidote or a bezoar in cases of poisoning."

"This would be great. Half the Auror Office is looking for the dark side´s new potions master. But we don´t even have a suspect. Nor has the order. The best we ever had was the idea about your brother, but you know best how this turned out."

"I´m glad it´s not him. Though I never believed he was. Severus is not the type of person to brew up poisons."

Alice smiled. "I´m glad we don´t have to send your brother to Azkaban." She watched Lily noting down how the potions changed due to the dragon blood. "Would you and James like to come to our house next Saturday?" she asked. "We invited Arthur and Molly, too. I thought it might be nice to spend an evening with young married couples. Without those bachelors around who don´t understand about mothers in law and stuff."

Lily laughed. "I´d love to come and I´m sure James will, too. We heard so much about Arthur and Molly, I´m actually looking forward to meeting them at last. Speaking of bachelors. What about Pamela? How´s she doing?"

"Pam? Great. She´s dating Fabian Prewitt. They´re cute together and I´ll eat my broomstick if they don´t end up married by next Christmas." She paused. "As for Arthur and Molly. No word about the order in their presence."

"Why?"

"Why? They´d want to join immediately. We can´t let them with three children to look after."

"OK. I´ll bear it in mind and warn James."

-x-

They met at the Longbottoms´ late in the afternoon the next Saturday. Alice had prepared fondue and they enjoyed a long chat while they were waiting for their meat to fry. Lily liked the Weasleys at first sight. Molly was warm hearted and motherly. Lily could picture her well with three children. Arthur, whose hair was as red as his wife´s, was a calm young man. He got excited when he learned that Lily was muggle born and she had to explain some muggle devices to him. Molly ended the chat about television sets and taxes after a while by pointing out that Arthur was boring the others.

A little later Alice brought the subject of children into the conversation and Molly pointed out how happy she was to have three. They talked about how difficult the decision whether to have children or not was.

"I´d feel uncomfortable with having a baby right now," Alice pointed out. "These are dark times. They´re not safe."

"Times are never safe enough," Molly said. "Having a family is a risk. No matter how times are."

Alice looked pensive. "You have a point," she admitted.

"Now, look at us," Arthur teased his wife, "we finally get a baby sitter, go out, meet grown up people, which is a very nice change, and what do we do? Talk about babies!"

Molly laughed. "You´re right, dear. Lily, Alice tells me you are a potions expert. What potions are you working with?"

Lily smiled and started telling about healing draughts. She didn´t mention poisoning or antidotes.

-x-

Molly and Arthur got up to take their leave shortly before eleven. "Fabian and Pam are baby sitting and we promised we´d back in time so they can go out afterwards," Molly explained.

"Why don´t we accompany them outside and take a little walk?" Frank suggested. "It´s not cold today and it would be nice to stroll in the moonlight."

The others agreed and so all six of them left the house. Lily linked her arm to James´s and they walked in silence until they reached a point far enough from the house for Molly and Arthur to apparate.

"Let´s walk up the hill," Alice suggested. "We´ll have a nice view from there."

Frank laughed. "Why would any of us want a view of muggle villages? You are the only view I´m interested in."

Alice hit her husband´s arm softly and chuckled.

"So, what do you think about the baby business now?" Lily asked. "Molly indeed has a point."

Alice smiled. "She has. Maybe I´ll consider it."

"Mum will be delighted to hear that." Frank teased.

"I´ll kill you if you tell her one syllable before I´m decided."

All four laughed.

-x-

The sound of apparition seemed loud as thunder in the otherwise quiet night. Lily had not even realized what the sound ment when the first spells lit up the dark path. Frank and Alice´s auror training took over immediately. They ducked and pulled their friends down. Their wands were out with the same smooth move. Lily drew her own wand and tried to remember everything she had learnt about self-defence.

"Don´t kill them, he wants them alive!" a voice shouted.

Lily was not sure whether this was good. Was being captured by death eaters good? Probably not.

"Try to reach the house," Alice hissed beside her. "They can´t get in."

Obviously the attackers were aware that the house meant safety to their objectives for several of them tried to intercept them on their way back the path. Lily tried to see how many attackers there were but it was difficult to tell in the dark. Five at least.

Beside her Alice disapparated with a faint plop. Lily didn´t have to ask herself for long where she had gone for moments later the death eaters were attacked from behind and Lily watched one of them lose conciousness in the light of a stunner spell. One down, at least four left.

Suddenly James was by her side. "Are you OK?" he shouted while he conjured a shield. Lily used the pause this gave her to send stinging hexes at the death eaters. Howls of pain told her that she had aimed well.

Apparating in a battle seemed to be auror standard because Frank changed position frequently. Slowly they fought their way towards the house.

Unfortunately the death eaters soon took a leaf out of the auror´s book and started apparating as well. James was hit by a burning curse. Lily shielded her husband and looked at the wounds. James face was red and full of blisters, as was his left hand. The smell of burnt hair and skin was sickening. Frank shouted a warning to Alice and cast an anti-apparition spell.

Luckily James was not the only one hit by a curse in this fight. Seemingly they had managed to take enough death eaters out of the battle to disencourage the others. Lily dragged James, who was more unconscious than awake, back to the house. Alice and Frank guarded their retreat.

At last they reached the house. Immediately Alice sent a message to the auror office by floo network. Lily was not sure whether she actually heard it but seconds later aurors were arriving near the house.

-x-

Lily had a look at James´s burnt skin as soon as it was clear that others were caring for their safety. The sight put her on the verge of tears. Quickly she started a healing charm. "We´ll get you a burn oinment later," she reassured him. "There will be no scars."

James moaned and pointed at his hair with his uninjured hand. Lily laughed. "Your hair will grow back, vain peacock!"

Frank was casting a healing charm on his own leg. He was bleeding badly from several wounds. "Are you hurt, Alice?" he asked in a pause.

"Nothing I can´t deal with," his wife answered. "I´ll get the oinment for James."

Only now Lily realized that Alice was limping. She was the only one to remain unhurt in the fight.

"You stupid man!" she scolded her husband. "You nearly got yourself killed because you were shielding me!"

"I´d never let them hurt you!" James protested weakly.

"I´d rather be bleeding a bit myself than lose you," Lily said sternly. Her harsh voice contradicted the tender stroke she applied on James shoulder.

Alice came back with a jar of salve and Lily started rubbing it carefully into James´s burnt skin while the auror sat down beside her husband and started healing her own injuries.

"Never, do you hear me, never will I expose a child to these dangers!" she hissed while she applied oinment on her leg from a second jar. "I don´t care what your mother says or wants!"

Frank agreed.

-x-

Their tending of wounds was interrupted by a knock on the front door. Frank got up to answer and soon returned to the living room with Alastor Moody.

"We caught three of them," Alastor informed them. "Two stunned and one too badly injured to escape. That must have been quite a battle. We´ll have to replace quite an amount of bushes up there on the hill or the muggles will notice. Are you all right?"

He went over to James to have a closer look at his injuries. "You´re lucky your wife knows a deal about healing or you´d have ruined your pretty face. Haven´t we taught you anything?"

"You taught him a lot or he´d be dead," Lily interjected. "This lovable fool wasted time and energy to shield me."

"You protect Lily in a fight? A fool you are indeed. We both know she´s the better dueller of you two! She can look after herself!"

"I can´t leave my wife unprotected!"

"She´s not unprotected as long as she has her wand! If you don´t stop that you´ll get both of you killed because she will start watching out for you instead of the enemy! In a battle your first duty is to protect yourself. You can protect others when your own safety is granted or you´ll be the weak spot of your team!"

"Leave him alone, Alastor," said Alice, "he´s already suffering enough."

Moody sighed. "How many were there?"

"Five," said Lily. Alice shook her head. "I counted six." – "Six," Frank agreed. "Five men and one woman. Three dark haired men, one of them rather small. One blond. One bold. The woman had dark hair. It may have been Bellatrix Lestrange. I´m not sure."

"I didn´t see a woman," said Lily.

"She was the one who hit James. She was on the far right side first. Then she apparated." Alice said. "I think I hit her with a stinging hex. Whom did you catch, Alastor?"

"One bold. Two dark haired, one of them small. Not yet identified."

"Is it safe for us to go home?" Lily asked. "I´d like to brew some more salve for James. I think I have a recipe which would grant a quicker healing. This must be still painful, poor you!"

"I´ll go with you," Alastor offered. "I don´t think they are waiting for you at your house, they usually don´t attack twice a night. But one never knows. And we have to talk about the security spells on your house."

-x-

Shortly later Alastor and James were sitting in the lab and watching Lily brew her salve. She had refused to be left out of the conversation as well as to delay her brewing.

"They were not after us," said James, "were they? The attack was meant for Alice and Frank. Our bad luck that we were there at that time."

Alastor shook his head. "This may be and may not be right. Lily and you may have been the actual targets. We´ll try to get this information from our captives."

Lily gave it a thought. "Wouldn´t it be imprudent to attack us when we are with two aurors? They´d get us more easily here."

"Not necessarily. Harold seems to have protected the house quite well. You leave it on rare occasions. And don´t forget that James´s friends are here very often. Not to speak about his mother. As weak as she may be, I´d nevertheless rather not face her in a fight for her son."

"I´m leaving the house on a regular basis," said James.

"So this may have been about Lily."

"No offence, sweetheart, but why, Alastor, would Voldemort go after an eighteen year old girl?"

"This is not a question of age!" Alastor cried. "It´s a question of power. The Order is after Voldemort´s potions master. Maybe now he´s after ours."

"You mean they want to kill me?" Lily asked in a small voice, measuring the needed amount of unicorn tears.

Alastor shook his head. "Not kill. Frank said, the death eaters were sent to catch someone alive. Not kill, recruit!"

"I´d never join them!"

"Luckily they´re not aware of that. This may buy you time."

Lily added the unicorn tears to her potion and stirred three times clockwise. "Just some minutes to cool it down and then we´ll do something about the pain, dear," she promised.

-x-

"I dread to tell mum," James admitted when Alastor had left. "It will upset her."

Lily had started to coat on the warm salve to his face. "You don´t look as badly burnt as before. In fact you look quite normal , just a bit pinkish. And your hair is a mess. I´ll try to fix a decent hair-cut later."

"Cut my hair? Never!"

"It has been burnt! I´ll cut off the singed parts."

"This will make it even shorter!"

"Don´t be stupid. It stinks. I will not sleep beside a heap of ashes!"

James sighed. "So be it, if you insist. But you won´t cut too much!"

-x-

Lily scrutinized her husband´s face and hair critically.

"So?" he asked. "How do I look?"

"I will admit that your hair looked better before this incident," Lily said as casually as possibly.

"Give me a mirror!"

"You don´t need a mirror when I tell you you look good!"

"Give me a mirror!"

"Don´t you trust me?"

"Give me a mirror! Now!"

Lily sighed and handed James a mirror. "What did you do?" he shouted. "Look at me!"

"That´s the best that could be done! It was burnt!"

James stooped and picked up a lock of black hair. "What was wrong with this? It´s not burnt at all and more than five centimeters long!"

"Be reasonable! You can´t wear your old hair-cut on the back of your head when there´s only one centimeter left on the front. I had to adjust it!"

"Adjust? I´m mared!"

Lily chuckled. "Mared? Aren´t you exaggerating, love?"

"Mum will get a heart-attack merely by the sight of this hair-cut. We won´t have to tell her about the death eaters at all!"

"We´ll tell her I made you change your look."

"Oh yes, and she´s gonna believe us. Because I look so much more sexy now!"

"Stop shouting or you´ll wake her. I´m going to bed now. When you´ve calmed down you can come and we´ll discuss, exactly how sexy you look." Lily turned on the spot and left her perplexed husband sitting in the kitchen. "And clean away the clippings!" she shouted back over her shoulder.

-x-

The next morning Lily woke to find James with his usual tuft of messy black hair lying beside her. She grinned. What a vain little peacock! He had magically regrown his hair over night. Careful to not wake him Lily slid out of her bed and tiptoed down to the kitchen to make breakfast.

-x-

Fedra Potter looked weak. She smiled when Lily came to her room to bring her breakfast. "Was there something wrong yesterday evening, dear?" she asked. "I thought I heard loud voices."

"Nothing to worry about, mum." Lily put down the tray on her mother in law´s bedside table.

"Please, tell me the truth. Not knowing would kill me."

Lily sighed. She´d have prefered James to be present in this conversation. "First of all I´d like you to know that we´re both well. No lasting harm was done," she started.

"But you were not well at some point." Fedra paled.

Lily took the womans hand in hers reassuringly. "We were present when Frank and Alice were attacked by death eaters. James was hit by a curse but his injuries were easily cured. All he needed was some salve. Can you believe him," Lily added in a light tone. "I had to cut his hair and he regrew it magically in his sleep!"

Mrs Potter chuckled. "He always did that when he was little. I finally gave up on wanting to trim his hair."

"I never knew he was so vain!" Lily exclaimed. "Well, I knew he was. But not concerning his hair."

The two women giggled over James´ attitude towards his hairstyle for a while and Fedra told some little stories about what her son had done when he was younger. Lily thought that the conversation could have gone worse.

-x-

James informed his friends what had happened later that morning. All three were present at the house by lunchtime to ask whether he and Lily needed help or wanted them to stay for extra backup. The offer was declined but the three were invited to stay for dinner.

Alastor called late in the afternoon, just when Lily finished cooking. James added another plate and chair to the table and soon seven people were assembled for a common meal as Fedra Potter had come downstairs to join the young folks.

"Tell us, Alastor," she asked, "did you find out more about yesterday´s attack?"

"That´s why I´m here," the auror growled. "We finally got one of these scum to talk. They were in fact after Lily. Sorry, girl, I don´t mean to upset you, but for your own safety you have to know."

"After Lily?" Remus cried. "Why is that?"

"Seemingly my assumptions were right. They are after our potions expert. He said Voldemort has been furious when we analysed that onion poison so quickly. He punished his own potions master badly for brewing up something so obvious."

"Did he tell who the potions master is?" asked James.

"He doesn´t know his name," Alastor shook his head. "All he could tell us is that he´s rather young and not well liked by Voldemort´s inner circle. ´They are friendly when he´s there but in his absence they speak disdainfully about him.´ That were his words. He has dark hair."

"Sorry, Lily," said Pettigrew, "but this does sound like your brother."

"We excluded this theory before," said Lily heatedly. "We found out that it´s not him. Now leave him alone."

"What if he hoodwinked you?" Pettigrew insisted.

"I don´t think he did that," said Remus. "If he´d tried to deceive Lily, he´d have remained friendly. But he was insulting."

James and the others agreed. "You´re probably right," murmured Pettigrew.

"You had another row with your brother?" asked Fedra. "Why didn´t you tell me?"

"It was nothing," sighed Lily, "and I didn´t want to upset you."

"Back to important things," said Moody. "Lily, you have to be very careful! Don´t go anywhere alone. If you leave the house, take one of the boys with you or ask for someone else from the order to come and accompany you."

"This makes me a prisoner!" cried Lily.

"Maybe. But you´ll hopefully stay alive."

There was an awkward silence after this statement.

-x-

It took Lily quite a while to get used to taking a bodyguard everywhere she went. In fact it wasn´t before summer that she realized that her guards could also be of advantage. She made Remus and Pettigrew carry her potion ingredients when they accompanied her to the moors to collect herbs.

Black – Sirius – turned out to be a charming conversationalist on their way to Flourish and Blott´s.

James took the duty of guarding his wife upon himself as often as possible. "You know, dear," Lily pointed out to him, "you will not be very useful as a guard if you keep staring at me instead of looking out for death eaters."

"I can´t help it," James moaned. "You´re so much more interesting than those!"

Lily chuckled and hit him playfully. "Watch the surroundings!"

"I can´t! We won´t be attacked in Diagon Alley anyway! And you look radiant in this dress!"

"So you think I should buy it?" Lily turned in front of the mirror.

"Definitely!"

-x-

It was early in August when Lily was working on another antidote for a dark potion Dumbledore had brought her. She sighed. Voldemort´s potions master was a busy guy. He seemed to invent new poisons on a weekly basis now. Each of the potions cost some lifes before a sample was brought to her and some were so sophisticatedly composed that it took her what seemed ages to analyse them and provide antidotes. It seemed as if there was a competition between her and the other side´s potiosn brewer going on.

This had been the eighth attempt to find the catalyst ingredient for the antidote to the latest work of Voldemort´s brewer. Bark of birch didn´t work. Nor did oak leaves or hazel roots. Lily was sure that it had to be something of a tree. The information was there. In the list of ingredients. Just in front of her nose. But it seemed to slip between her fingers when she tried to get a grip. She paced her lab and murmured the list of ingredients under her breath.

Leaf-bud of beech! This had to be it! She searched the jars and pouches on the shelves. Lily cursed. None there! Where could she get leaf-buds in August? From young trees. She sighed again. Lily needed to go to the wood immediately.

-x-

Lily sipped her tea in the kitchen and tried to refrain from throwing her cup at the wall in frustration. She needed someone to accompany her to the wood but nobody had time. She had sent her patronus to several members of the order but all she got back was messages of regret and reminders to stay at home until she found a guard. She sighed. Not long and James would be home from Wales. He would go for leaf-buds with her.

Lily smiled. Hopefully he had found the parchments he was trying to get from the little church in Wales. As her possibilities to go out had been limited for some months, Lily had started translating old rune texts. So far she had – beside loads of descriptions of well-known charms – found one old shield charm (very powerful, very useful for the order) and one spell to distract an enemy (not equally useful, but not bad either).

-x-

"Is this really necessary?" James complained as he stood beside the small beech tree holding a bag into which Lily threw her leaf-buds. "I´m hungry and it´s already getting dark!"

"Stop whining," Lily scolded. "This poison has killed at least fifteen people as far as we know. I´d better find an antidote soon."

"Why don´t they use bezoars? Albus said this kills slowly. So there´s enough time to get one."

"Slowly and painfully, these were his words. And he also said a bezoar will slow down the poisoning but not stop it. By applying a bezoar you´ll extend the victim´s suffering but not safe him or her."

"What an awful potion!" said James. "Who thinks of something like that?"

"Join me and I shall introduce you to the mastermind!" said a cold voice from between the trees.

Lily and James started. A man in a plain black robe approached them soundlessly. His otherwise handsome face was mared by a red gleam in his eyes. His hair was hidden under a black hood. His wand was nearly white as if made of bone instead of wood. It was a sharp contrast to his robes.

"Join me and you shall live." The man smiled. An empty, cold smile.

Lily looked for a way to escape. If only she could grab James and apparate. James had pocketed his wand to hold the bag. The girl herself had used her wand to summon the twigs of the young tree she had been picking buds from.

More hooded figures were closing in on them though the red eyed man was the only one who had his wand out. The others merely watched their master seemingly not thinking they´d need their wands as long as he cast his own spells.

"You can´t escape little witch," he continued. "Join me and I shall be mercyful and spare your husband as well."

Lily stepped between James and the man. The death eaters giggled.

"I´ll never join you!" Lily hissed.

"Then I´ll have to kill you." The man said with mock regret. "My friends," he spoke up and the death eaters focused their attention on him. "we´ve come here in vain. The redcap refuses to join us!"

The death eaters laughed.

"You´ll beg me to let you join!" he addressed Lily again. "They all do after some minutes under the cruciatus. And look," he chuckled. A cold sound. "I don´t even have to apply it on you. You´ll be glad to join just to buy your husband a quick death."

Lily´s thoughts raced. What was she to do? Fight him. But how?

The wizard chuckled again. "Fight me, little witch? Only few are brave enough to even consider it!"

Surprise him! Lily remembered Severus´ lessons.

"Surprise me?" Voldemort sounded curious now. "Don´t interfere, my faithful friends. Let´s see what your new sister can do. I grant you the first spell! Here you go."

Lily waved her wand without thinking. A huge swarm of colorful butterflies obstructed Voldemort´s view. Lily turned on the spot, grabbed James´ arm and dragged him away.

Behind them they heard the dark wizard´s laughter. "Let them go. She´s amusing, the little witch," he ordered. "They can´t escape us forever. Soon we´ll mark her as ours."

Lily grabbed James tighter and disapparated. When they reappeared near their house both ran to the safety of its protective spells at maximum speed. As soon as the front door had closed on them, Lily sent her patronus to Albus Dumbledore.

-x-

Dumbledore sat in the living room and waited for Lily to calm down enough to tell him what had happened. He had heard James´ version but it left many questions open.

Lily sobbed at her husband´s shoulder. James stroked her hair trying to concentrate on his conversation with the professor.

"Can´t we continue this tomorrow?" he finally asked. "Lily is exhausted."

Dumbledore shook his head. "I´m sorry, James. This is urgent. I need to know what happened in detail. Do you have some calming potion?"

"I don´t need a calming potion!" Lily said in a small voice and wiped her tears with the palm of her hand. "And I have no time for it either. I need to finish this antidote." Suddenly she was alert. "You did bring back the bag, didn´t you?"

James pointed at the mantlepiece where the bag of leaf-buds lay.

"Lily, having heard James´ story I think there was more going on than he saw. Am I right?"

James looked at his wife curiously.

"Did you know that this evil creature is a legilimens?" asked Lily. "He knew what I was thinking and responded. That´s why his words didn´t make sense to James."

"Do tell!"

Lily reported how she had thought about fighting Voldemort and how he had laughed at the thought.

Dumbledore listened carefully and without interrupting.

"We gained some important information today," he said when Lily had finished. "Voldemort is indeed after Lily. Not to kill but to recruit. Voldemort has acquired the ability of legilimency." Dumbledore ticked them off on his fingers. "And finally Lily impressed him. Or you´d both be dead."

Dumbledore got up. "I´ll inform Alastor. He´ll want to know about the other persons present. If we´re lucky we may be able to identify unknown death eaters. We rarely get the chance to speak to someone who met a whole bunch of them. And I´ll be back tomorrow to add some protective charms to the house. Go to bed now. You can work on your antidote tomorrow, Lily."

The girl shook her head. "I´d be unable to sleep anyway. I need to do something to fight this monster and be it only by making his poison useless." She got up and grabbed the bag from the mantlepiece. "I´ll be in my lab."

At the door she turned and faced Dumbledore. "I didn´t impress him. I amused him. He was playing with me like a cat with a mouse. He´ll eat me when he´s tired of playing."


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34: Hide and Seek

Alastor Moody arrived in the early morning. "Are you alright? You look pale," he asked Lily worriedly.

"I didn´t get much sleep." Lily confessed. "But I found an antidote." She smiled tiredly.

"I need your recollections of yesterday´s events," Moody was all business. "We hope we can identify some faces. Where can I put this?" He showed a stone basin.

Lily whistled. "A pensieve? I never thought I´d see one. These are rare!"

"Borrowed it from Albus."

"Come to the living room. Tea?"

"Yes, please." The auror put the pensieve on the table. "Where´s James?"

"Telling his mum about yesterday."

"Shouldn´t you be there as well?"

Lily shook her head and placed a cup before Alastor. "I look tired and pale. It would upset her."

"Does James look any better?"

"Indeed, he does."

"How come? I´d not guess he´d go to sleep while you exhaust yourself in the lab!"

"Well, he had not much choice seeing that somebody slipped a spoonful of sleeping draught into his tea."

"You poisoned your husband?"

"Not exactly poisoned. I just made sure that one of us is well rested and awake today."

"Is he aware of what you did?"

"No. He apologized for falling asleep. You won´t tell him, will you?"

Moody scowled. "No, I guess not," he finally said. He didn´t touch his tea.

"Shall we start?" Lily pointed at the stone basin.

"You know how this works?"

Lily nodded. She raised her wand to her temple, concentrated and carefully removed a delicate silvery string that was her memory of the encounter in the forest. With a diligent movement she put it into the pensieve where it swayed lazily, neither gas nor liquid.

"With your permission." The auror waited for her nod of consent before he bent over the basin to view the memory.

-x-

"Girl, that was a coldblooded thing to do! Butterflies!" Moody eyed Lily in awe.

"Coldblooded?" Lily chuckled. "Alastor, I was scared beyond my wits. I didn´t think. I just knew I had to do something. Anything."

"Well, you were lucky. Seemingly it was the right thing to do. This memory will be very useful. There are five faces in plain view which are not yet on our wanted list."

Lily shook her head. "You can´t have the memory. You can look at it here and now but you can´t have it. I need it. I mustn´t forget what it is like to face him. What he is like."

"I see. Well, my memory of your memory will have to do." Moody smiled encouragingly. "I do hope James hurries a bit. I need a memory of what he has seen, too."

"May I ask you, do you think we´re still safe here? Should we go into hiding?"

Moody sighed. "We can´t know for sure. But I think if Albus adds some protective spells to those already in place the house will be safe enough."

-x-

James´ memory brought two more faces to Moody´s attention. The auror was very content when he left.

"How did mum take the news?" Lily asked her husband when they were finally alone.

"Not too well," James sighed. "She was crying but she calmed down after a while. You look so tired, love. Why don´t you go to bed and have a nap?" He poured Lily a cup of tea.

"I can´t," Lily whispered and took a sip of tea. "I have to do something about this evil man!"

"You can´t fight him when you´re exhausted and tired. You need a rest. Come, go to bed and when you wake up I´ll have a nice meal ready for you. How does that sound?"

"Great," Lily whispered tiredly. "Can I have chocolate cake?"

"Chocolate cake?" James looked puzzled. "Well, why not."

Lily smiled. James lifted his sleeping wife and carried her upstairs. He carefully placed her on the bed and covered her with a blanket. "Well, love, you´re not the only one who knows about sleeping draught," he whispered and kissed Lily lightly on her forehead.

-x-

Lily heard soft voiced from the kitchen when she came downstairs. She smiled. Alice and Frank!

"Lily!" Alice hurried to her and hugged her tightly as soon as she entered the kitchen. She was not the only one to come and greet her with relief. Frank and Sirius were there. As was Remus.

Lily smiled at her friends. Their presence was comforting and welcome.

"James just told us!" Alice returned to the oven. "You were so brave! And lucky. Your cake will be ready in a minute."

"My cake?"

"Your chocolate cake," grinned James.

"You make Alice bake my cake? I wanted you to do it!"

"Oh come on, girl. You know I have no idea how to bake a cake. And I thought you wanted to eat it."

"We were so shocked when we heard!" Remus changed topic before Lily and James could start one of their little rows.

The others nodded in agreement. "Getting away unhurt was quite an achievement," said Frank in his calm voice. "We met him twice last year and got away alive, but only just. We were both badly hurt. I had to spend nearly a month at ´s last time."

"Dumbledore says he wanted to recruit you?" Sirius asked.

"Dumbledore? Is he here?"

"You missed him by minutes," said James. "He added some protective spells to the house. When he was finished he left with Peter, who asked me to tell you he said hello."

"What for did he take Peter with him?" Lily was puzzled. Peter certainly was the least powerful wizard of those present. What was Dumbledore up to when he took the weakest link with him?

"Wants an extra training session with him," said Sirius. "He said we were to protect you and checked on Remus and Peter´s progress in learning those defence techniques. Well, Moony passed his test easily," – the werewolf blushed with pride – "but you can´t say that for Peter. Dumbledore was furious. Said he´d be useless if he didn´t try harder. But enough of that. Is it true he tried to recruit you?"

Lily nodded. "Recruit me and use James as bait. I just don´t understand what he needs me for. He has a brilliant potions master."

"How can you call this evil creature brilliant!" James cried.

Lily shrugged. "He may be evil but still his work is brilliant. He´d be a top-ranking scientist had he not dedicated his abilities to the dark. He´s giving me quite a lot of work. And every time I think I know what he does he invents something new. Voldemort must be very content with him."

"From what we hear he´s not," said Frank. At once he had everyone´s attention. "Well," he elaborated, "we catch mostly lower ranks but from what they tell Voldemort is not satisfied with his potions expert."

"How´s that?" Lily and the others asked.

"You see, when Lily found an antidote for this poison back in January he punished his brewer severely. In fact he nearly killed him. It took some weeks for him to recover." Lily remembered the lack of new poisons in February. "But Voldemort had to see that this form of punishment would lose him his potions master. So now he´s working with threats mostly. But he punishs his brewer every time we come up with an antidote."

Lily paled. "You tell me every time I find an antidote I doom a man to be punished?"

"And you save dozens of lives."

Lily had to sit. She had enjoyed her match of intellects with the unknown potions master to some extent. Of course her main motivation to brew up antidotes had been saving lives. But no matter how lethal the poisons were, they had also been enigmatic and each had a beauty of compound only another potions master could esteem. So her opponent had to physically pay for every intellectual advantage she gained in their competition.

"You don´t pity this monster, do you?" James looked at his wife questioningly.

"How do you know he´s a monster, James? After what we just heard, how do we know that I´m not analyzing the fruits of his fear rather than malice? You saw Voldemort. You stood in his presence for a minute or two. What must it be like to stand there every day? Would any of us have the strength to tell him we won´t brew poison for him any more? I think not."

"Neither of us would have started brewing poison for him!" cried Sirius.

"Wouldn´t we?" Lily shook her head. "How can you be so sure, Sirius. If he caught you in a weak moment. When you felt unhappy and empty and hopeless?"

"You´re unbelievable." James wrapped his arms around Lily´s shoulders.

"I still don´t understand why he wants to recruit me," Lily whispered.

Alice put a piece of cake in front of the girl. "Because you make his potions master useless. His brewer is brilliant. There is no use denying it. But Voldemort can´t use his talents properly as long as you work for us. So he has to either get rid of you or recruit you. I shudder to think what you and this guy could do if you worked hand in hand."

"So this is not over?" Lily sounded frightened.

Alice shook her head. "It is not. But we´ll do our best to protect you."

-x-

As much as Lily had felt imprisoned by the need to take bodyguards with her all spring, now she longed for the freedom that had been hers then for now she was a true prisoner in her house. Whenever she needed something she was supposed to inform the order and someone would go and get it for her. She missed the little trips to the moors or forest in Remus´ and Peter´s company and she was frustrated.

The two were still assigned to collecting herbs for her but neither of them was a potions master or herbologist.

"Really, Albus!" she raged at an order meeting (which was held for her safety´s sake in her living room). "You can´t expect me to brew premium potions with inferior ingredients. I know Peter and Remus are doing their best, but they aren´t experts in this area."

Dumbledore smiled at Lily. "Calm down, dear girl. I´ll go and get your ingredients. I´m the closest to a potions expert we have not counting you."

Lily wanted to bang her head at the wall in frustration. "Albus!" she fumed to the stiffled chuckles of some order members. "I don´t want the most powerful wizard of our times to pick chives for me. I want to leave this house just for once. I´ve been locked up here for almost three months. I´m going crazy."

James tried to calm her down by patting her hand. Lily got up from her seat and started pacing the room, which was quite an achievement seeing that fifteen people including one half-giant were stuffed into it.

"I was not even allowed to Diagon Alley to get me new robes!" Lily raged on. "My husband chose these for me!"

"His taste is not bad," remarked Fabian Prewitt.

"That´s not the point," spat Lily. "I´d have liked to choose. To try on some. To...to breath for an hour or two."

"You´re right, Lily," said Dumbledore into the following silence. "It´s not fair to have you locked up all the time. I can´t rid the world of the dangers it holds for you, but if you wish, I´ll be at your service for one day tomorrow. You´re not likely to be attacked when I´m with you."

Lily was taken aback. "You´re offering to spend a day outside with me? I´ll have a pass? But Albus, you´re so busy! You have more important things to do!"

Dumbledore smiled. "You´re working hard for the order. Tomorrow nothing will be more important than you. Where will we go?"

"I may choose? Anywhere?"

"Anywhere."

"Can I make my choice tomorrow?"

"Of course."

The rest of the meeting Lily spent thinking about all the places she´d like to go.

-x-

Lily was up at the crack of dawn the next day. She ate breakfast and sat in the kitchen to wait for Dumbledore. He arrived early having anticipated the girl´s eagerness to start her day outside.

"So, where are we going?" he asked with an amused twinkling of his eyes.

"The moors. I need to breathe and to collect some herbs."

"So I´m not to pick the chives but to watch you picking them." Dumbledore chuckled.

Lily laughed. "Well, I´ll consider letting you do some picking on your own." They were walking away from the house and Lily thought she hadn´t felt that good in months.

-x-

It was great being back to the moors of her childhood. Although she hadn´t been there for years, Lily felt at home. She recognized every bush and every stone. The only sorrow were the memories of with whom she had been there in the past. However, Lily was determined not to let these ruin her day in freedom.

They hiked across the soft hills and Lily collected the herbs she needed. Dumbledore held her bags patiently and helped picking when asked to. When Lily didn´t watch he smiled at the young woman´s high spirits which reminded of a foal let out to the paddock for the first time. She seemed to cherish every detail of their day. The air which held the perfume of herbs. The colors of the moors. The songs of the birds. Even the sunshine itself.

"Tell me, Albus," Lily demanded when they had a little break. "Were you really going to go anywhere I asked you to?"

Dumbledore sipped his tea and nodded. "I promised. Though I will admit that I´ve been hoping you hadn´t in mind to go shopping in a lingerie shop."

Lily giggled. "I thought of doing that in the afternoon. – Only kidding, Albus!"

-x-

Lily´s mood got considerably worse near lunchtime.

"What is it?" asked Dumbledore.

The girl pointed at a group of bushes. "Memories. Severus and I used to put up our tent over there when we hiked the moors."

"You went on hiking tours in your holidays?"

"Whenever the atmosphere was dense at home." When Dumbledore made no remark on that, Lily continued. "My sister Petunia detests magic. She hated being in the same house with me. Things got worse when Severus moved in. So my parents agreed to let us go hiking from time to time. It gave us all a break." She smiled sadly.

"Master Snape was like a true brother to you, wasn´t he?"

"It´s not easy to be the only witch in a muggle family." Lily sighed. "He was my only friend and confidant during the holidays. The only person who really knew what I am and what this means."

"It must be very hurtful to be rebuffed by him. The whole quarrel is about James, I understand?"

Lily nodded sadly.

"There´s nothing to be done?"

"I don´t see what." For some moments the girl lingered in her memories, then she looked up and smiled. "There are some sloe-trees over there. Let´s go and pick some!"

"Sloe!" Dumbledore cried. "Indispensable for the brewing of antidotes!"

"Actually not," Lily chuckled. "But it makes a good cough syrup. You don´t want your fighters to lose on a cold, do you?"

-x-

The sloe-trees grew in a hollow. If you didn´t know where to look for them you were unlikely to find them. Lily led the way and Dumbledore – charged with bags – followed at a short distance. Lily stopped short when she got her first view of the sloes. Albus was beside her with his wand out in an instant. How did a man of his age move so quickly?

Dumbledore pocketed his wand when the trees came into view for him, too. The slim figure in black robes, who was picking sloes, was not likely to attack his charge. Insult, yes, but not attack.

"We´ll find sloes somewhere else," whispered Lily and turned on the spot.

Albus grabbed her elbow. "Don´t be silly. He´s your brother and you haven´t seen him in months. He can´t be resentful forever. But you need to talk to each other to make things up." He gently pushed the girl towards the trees.

"Albus, last time I talked to him I was crying for days!"

"Which only proves to me that you care."

Lily hesitated. She wasn´t sure she was ready to talk to Severus. But it was too late anyway. Severus had turned and spotted them.

-x-

Dumbledore led the way down the slope. "Ah, Master Snape!" he cried cheerfully. "What a pleasant surprise. Only minutes ago we´ve been talking about you!" He shook the younger wizard's hand.

"Hello, Severus," Lily said in a small voice. They shook hands, too, but the girl could tell that Severus would rather have slapped her. He looked even paler than back in January. His fingers felt not only cool but cold despite the sunny day.

"Professor, Lily," Severus greeted them with a quick nod. "I´ll be finished here in a minute. There are enough sloes left for you and I will not disturb you longer than necessary."

"I´d rather have a break before we start picking sloes," said Dumbledore. "I´m not as young as I used to be." He wiped his forehead, sighed and conjured an armchair, a sofa and a table laid for tea for three with a casual wave of his wand. He nearly collapsed into the armchair. Lily stiffled a giggle when she remembered the same person, who was now acting the decrepit man, rush to her side minutes before.

"Come join me, you two," Dumbledore panted, "don´t let an old man have his tea alone. The sloes won´t run away."

Lily sat on the sofa obediently.

"I´m not sure I have time." Severus was not to be tempted to the sofa easily.

"Lily just told me you haven´t met for almost a year!" cried Dumbledore. "And I myself haven´t met one of my best students for even longer! You can´t withhold your company from us now that we luckily met you! I´m sure whatever you´re up to, it can wait a half hour!"

Reluctantly Severus sat beside Lily. He carefully placed his bag beside the sofa.

"Collecting ingredients, Severus?" Lily asked.

"Yes."

"You didn´t tell about your job last time we met. Are you working as a potions master?"

"A friend asked me to brew him some cough syrup."

"Cough syrup! Exactly what we´re intending to make!" Dumbledore beamed.

Severus shot him a look of disbelief. The most powerful sorcerer in the country was collecting ingredients for a cough syrup every first year could brew up? "May I ask," he said thoughtfully. "How come, Lily, that Albus Dumbledore goes picking sloes with you?"

"Actually she brought me for the chives." Dumbledore interjected.

Severus was irritated. "Chives? There are no chives in the moors."

"Just an insider joke," said Lily. "I´m having a safety problem at the moment. Albus is my bodyguard."

"A safety problem?" All grudges seemed to be forgotten. Severus´ voice was full of concern and he took Lily´s hand in his. "Please tell me!"

"I met Voldemort some months ago. I escaped, but I´m no longer safe."

"What does he want with you?"

"I´m the one who makes his poisons useless. I´m in his way."

"I see. But you´re safe with Albus Dumbledore as a bodyguard."

"That´s only for today. Albus has more important things to do."

"What can be more important than your safety!"

"Lots of things. But I´m safe enough. James does his best..." Lily could have slapped herself. At the mention of James Severus withdrew his hand from hers and shrank back to his bitter, unforgiving self.

"It´s late," Severus said. "I have to go. Thank you for the tea, professor." He grabbed his bag and as soon as he disappeared behind the sloe-trees they heard the faint pop of disapparition.

"You see," Lily said. "There´s nothing to be done."

Dumbledore smiled and his eyes twinkled. "All I saw was a young man who cares for you. He just can´t overcome his pride at the moment."

"You think he´ll come around?"

"I´m sure that – sooner or later – you´ll have your brother back."

Lily got up. "Let´s get some sloes and go home." She suggested.

"Are you sure? Your day is not over."

"Nothing we´ll do can top this conversation."

Lily hummed a merry little song under her breath while she picked sloes.

-x-

"You know, Albus," Lily said when they walked away from the trees. "I´d rather not tell James we met Severus."

"Why is that?"

"Severus´ dislike is not one-sided. I don´t want to upset James. And he´d probably ruin my good mood. I mean, this conversation went better than any in years and I don´t want to spoil it with endless discussions with James."

Dumbledore smiled. "I will keep your little secret," he promised.

-x-

When they apparated near the house they were waited for by a very nervous Remus.

"Come to the house quickly!" he cried as soon as the two had materialized. "We have been attacked! They couldn´t get into the house but we don´t know whether they are still around."

"Is anybody injured?" asked Dumbledore who had his wand out in an instant.

"Mrs Potter was hit by a stunner. A healer is here. Everybody else is alright."

They ran to the house as quickly as possible and Lily rushed up to her mother in law´s bedroom. The healer was examining her and James watched, looking very pale.

"She will be OK, won´t she?" whispered Lily. "Remus said it was a stunner."

"She´s been weak recently, even a stunner could be lethal for her," James whispered back.

"I´m so sorry I wasn´t here."

James embraced Lily. "Don´t blame yourself, love," he said softly. "Your presence wouldn´t have made a difference."

"Why was she out there at all?"

"You know my mother!" snorted James. "Nothing would hold her in her bed when her son is fighting in front of the house."

"You have a point."

-x-

Fedra´s condition wasn´t as bad as they had feared. The healer gave Lily a recipe for a potion the woman was to take regularly, but she didn´t need to be taken to hospital.

Lily prepared dinner and they had a meal with their friends. Even Dumbledore stayed and chatted and laughed with the young folks. The encounter with Severus was not mentioned.

-x-

The house was attacked three more times up to Christmas. The protective spells worked well and the death eaters never got into the house but life was not easy for Lily and James.

Lily had to stay inside all the time and James left the house only to meet business partners. He tried to avoid patterns in his schedule. By Christmas both were nervous and edgy.

"You know, children," said Fedra Potter when they were having tea on Christmas day, "you should sell the house and go into hiding. Move to another house from time to time. The main reason you´re restricted to the house is that they know where to find you."

"But mum," James argued, "you´re too weak to move every some weeks. We can´t do that."

"I won´t be a burden to you much longer, Jamie" said Fedra.

"Please, don´t talk like that," whispered Lily.

Fedra cupped Lily´s cheek in her hand. "There´s no use denying it, child. We all have to move on one day. I can feel that my day is approaching fast. Please, promise you will do as I told you. Don´t let this house be your jail."

"Mum, this house has belonged to the Potter family for generations," said James.

"Nevertheless it´s only a house, Jamie."

-x-

Fedra died in January. James sold the house two weeks later and bought a smaller one using the name James Evans.

Dumbledore came to put strong protective charms on the house. Only their close friends were informed where to find the Potters.

Despite of her grief for Fedra, Lily was happy. She was free to leave her home again. She was able to breathe.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35: Abroad

Springtime brought more attacks. Now they were not directed at Lily and James but more than once members of the order found themselves to be targets.

Weeks after announcing his engagement to Alice´s cousin Pam, Fabian Prewitt and his brother were killed. The order was petrified. The Prewitt brothers had been two of their best duellers. If they were not safe, nobody was.

This was why Lily was more than willing to accept Myra´s invitation to her wedding in France.

"Are you sure we can go?" she asked Dumbledore at an order meeting. "I don´t want to abandon my duties."

"You have done more than most of us," the latter reassured her. "You deserve a break. Take your husband and attend your friend´s wedding. Enjoy yourselves. We can manage for a while without you."

James was not too happy with neglecting business, but in the end his longing to move freely won over his sense of duty.

-x-

Although May was only beginning, the air was hot in southern France. The crickets were loud as ever, only the scent of lavender was absent from the landscape Lily knew so well.

"Isn´t it beautiful?" she asked letting go of James and stretching her arms.

James looked round. "It is," he agreed. "Where do we have to go?"

"Just down the hill," said Lily. "Myra said we were to come to the Duponts´ summer house." She pointed at the familiar farm house at the foot of the hill. "You´ll love it," she promised.

"I´ll love it because you are there." James put his arm around Lily´s waist and kissed her.

Lily laughed. "What are people to think about us? Stop it, you monster!"

She led the way down the hill. On their way she told James how she had walked down the path the first time with Albus Dumbledore.

"Did I ever tell you how much I missed you that year?" James smiled.

"Don´t you dare lie to me! You hadn´t even noticed me by then!"

"I solemnly swear I had!"

"Charming liar!"

The door of the summer residence was opened before Lily even got a chance to knock. "Lily!" Myra fell on her neck and laughed happily. After a long hug she stepped back and eyed her friend. "Marriage does you good," she laughed and turned to greet Lily´s husband.

"Hello, S..." the word never came out. "Hi, James, nice to see you again."

Lily slowly breathed out. Oh, stupid, stupid girl. She had totally forgotten that Myra still thought she had married Severus. Please, don´t let James suspect anything. But James had been far too occupied with taking in the details of the landscape and the house to notice Myra´s slip. Lily couldn´t believe her luck.

"Pierre," cried Myra back into the house over her shoulder, "Lily and James are here!"

Pierre came to greet the guests. "Hallo, we have not met, I´m Pierre," he shook James´ hand. "I´ll show you your room and we can get your luggage upstairs."

-x-

"You married James Potter?" Myra cried in a hushed voice as soon as the two men had disappeared. "I had no idea! I thought Severus was the one!"

"I´ll tell you in private what happened. For now only one thing: James has no idea about me and Severus. To him Severus is nothing more than my foster-brother. Please, please, please, let it stay this way."

"Wow, that´s quite a secret you´re keeping from your husband."

"I didn´t tell him in the beginning and he would be angry I didn´t if he learned now. There´s no need to upset him."

"So he has no reason to be jealous?"

"Of course not! What do you think of me!"

"Only the best, dear. Your secret is safe with me. But mind you, I hope it´s not too late to warn Pierre."

-x-

"Ah, I always loved this place!" Lily stretched in her chair on the patio. They were having a late breakfast with café au lait and croissants. "It´s so beautiful in spring with all those flowers."

"You´re a bit late for all the flowers, it´s already too hot for most," said Pierre. "So tell us, what have you been doing for the last two years. Where did you meet your husband? I want to know everything!"

"Actually we´ve known each other for a long time," said James. "We were in the same house at Hogwarts."

Lily could tell that Pierre was doing some thinking. "James? Not James Potter!" he cried, his eyes round as saucers. "Ooops, sorry!" Pierre closed his mouth.

"It´s alright, Pierre," laughed Lily and took her husband´s hand in hers. "He´s aware that I thought he was an idiot."

James looked scandalized. "You never told me! You married an idiot?" he cried teasingly.

"Right after discovering I loved the fool!" Lily leaned over to receive a kiss.

Pierre and Myra laughed.

"Well, boys," said Myra after breakfast, "why don´t you entertain yourselves for a while? The bride needs to consult with her best friend. You know, boring stuff like dresses and hairstyle."

Obediently the two men got up and left. The last thing Lily heard was Pierre suggesting a look at a bookshop in Marseilles.

-x-

"They´re gone," said Myra after a minute. "Now tell me everything. How could you end up married to James Potter? I mean, of all idiots at school he was the worst! What became of Severus? Why did you dump him?"

Lily´s expression darkened. "I didn´t. He was acting the idiot. Refused to talk to me. Accused me of being involved with James."

"But you are! As involved as you could possibly get!"

"I wasn´t then. James was courting me, but he had been doing that for two years. I still don´t know what gave Severus the idea that I´d suddenly prefer James over him."

"So he was jealous. Well, there´s nothing wrong with a bit of that."

"A bit? He was so cruel! I must have been crying my eyes out for months and he was so unforgiving. There was not even anything to forgive. At last I gave up and tried to be more open for James."

"It worked, obviously."

"James is a real sweetheart. He´d fetch me the moon if I asked him to."

"Thinking about Severus must be hurtful, though."

"Not as much as you´d think. I don´t love him anymore. I´d like him as a friend, but my love is all James´s. So, do you have a dress already?"

"No, we´re going to Paris tomorrow. And don´t try to change topic! I still can´t believe you. You and Severus had mastered so many difficulties and then you end up in the arms of the reason for most of those difficulties! Am I mistaken or was it James Potter who made your live miserable for years?"

"You´re absolutely right, but it was also James Potter who was there for me whenever I needed someone. Never demanding anything. Never expecting anything. But always there. Like the air or the sun. He didn´t ever mean to cause me misery. He meant to protect me from the very beginning."

"I can´t believe that you believe that."

Lily sighed. "Look, can´t we just say that I´m happy the way it turned out? Very happy?"

Myra laughed. "Of course we can. I wasn´t going to blame you for anything. It´s just so unbelievable. Well, you could have married Sirius Black. This would be weird."

Lily grinned. "It might interest you that he was best man at our wedding. And he comes to dinner every Sunday. It was I who invited him." Lily giggled. "He even brings me a box of sweets every time he drops by."

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" Myra pressed her hands at her heart. "I´m going to faint! Sirius Black, worst ass in Gryffindor house, buys you sweets?"

Lily laughed and slapped Myra´s arm playfully. "Stop it! You can´t help who you fall in love with and even less who his friends are!"

Myra hugged Lily. "All that counts is that you´re happy," she whispered. "though I never would have guessed that Severus would ever let go of you!"

-x-

The girls spent their day discussing the wedding. Myra described the dress she was hoping to get and they tried some hairstyles. Lily had brought some of her wedding photos. Myra examined them closely.

"I like what you´ve done with your hair," she said. "Do you think this would suit me, too? And the veil was gorgious! Where did you get it?"

"Borrowed it from my mother in law."

"Is she nice?"

"She´s dead; and she was very nice."

"Sorry to hear that she died."

"She died peacefully in her sleep and she was very old. She knew that she was going to die. It had become too much for her. All the fighting."

"Fighting?"

Lily sighed. "I´ve been a target for the dark side for more than a year. James and I are hiding. We even had an encounter with Voldemort himself. It was a narrow escape."

Myra looked at Lily fearfully. "The encreasing number of attacks was one of the reasons why my family moved to France. So you´re right in the middle of the whole mess?"

Lily nodded. "You don´t need to be frightened. They don´t leave the island. They didn´t follow us here. You know that I´d never expose you to danger, don´t you?"

Myra shook her head. "I wasn´t thinking of that. I was thinking of my best friend being on the run."

"I can't tell you details, but be assured we are not alone. We have friends who protect us."

"I´m glad to hear that."

-x-

They were joined by Angelique and her boyfriend, a very handsome blond, in the afternoon. Myra came to the point right after the introductions.

"Angelique, just a quick word before the boys return," she said casually, "we both were mistaken a bit last summer. Lily married James Potter."

Angelique nearly dropped her cup. "You must be kidding!"

"I´m serious. James doesn´t know about our little mistake and he´s not to find out."

Angelique looked puzzled for a moment. "Oh," she exclaimed at last, "of course not."

"What was this about?" asked André.

"Nothing, dear, nothing," Angelique ensured him with a broad smile. "Just a little joke between friends."

André followed the girls´ conversation with polite interest. As topics like wedding dresses kept coming up, there was not much he could contribute. So he looked quite relieved when Pierre and James returned from their trip to the city.

-x-

Supper was served on the patio by a house elf.

"Uncle Aureus´ wedding present!" Myra explained happily. "He gave her to me early because he thought I could do with some help concerning the preparations. Her name is Muddy."

"Muddy?" asked Lily when the elf had left. "That´s a cruel choice of name!"

"I know," said Myra. "I tried to change it, but it can´t be done. I´ve been told that once an elf is named it has to keep and obey the name."

"The choice of name – or lack of it – is part of their liability," said André.

"He works at the ministry. Something with magical creatures," explained Myra.

"Muddy is a good cook," James pointed out.

"She is," said Myra proudly. "She´s a good elf."

"How was your afternoon, Pierre? I was a bit late to join you," André changed topic.

"You missed a lot!" cried Pierre. "James turned out to be an expert on old books. We had a great day at Marseilles. It was so nice for a change to be in a bookshop with a person who will not nag you to hurry and go on to a robes shop."

"So perhaps James will marry you, if you ask him." Myra said teasingly.

"Ah, non!" cried Pierre. "I´m sure James is not as good a kisser as you, love!"

"Hey!" James exclaimed in protest. "I´m a great kisser. Ask my wife!"

"Be careful, sweetheart, or Pierre will ask for a proof!" Lily laughed.

"Urgh!" Pierre and James cried in unison.

The group stayed up till well past midnight. Lily hadn´t felt so free and easy for months.

-x-

The next morning they went to Paris. The three men kissed their girls good-bye as soon as they entered Ruelle des Secrets. Pierre and André planned to introduce James to the finer points of French cuisine. The girls headed to a robes shop where they spent hours searching for Myra´s wedding dress.

"I´m not sure I like the laces," said Myra and turned in front of the mirror for what must be the hundreth time.

"They suit you very well. It looks a bit playful," the shop assistant tried to be helpful.

"I liked the plain one better," said Lily.

"I prefer this," Angelique pointed at another set of robes.

At last Myra took the laced dress. The shop assistant was right. It looked playful and cute and it went well with her long curly hair.

-x-

The girls were charged with bags when they met the boys. They had not only bought the dress, but also a veil, two pairs of shoes (Myra could not decide) and a bag full of accessories like hair-clips.

"Oh my god," cried Pierre, "tell me you´re not going to wear all this!"

"Well," said Myra, "I was not going to wear the bags."

Pierre moaned. "Was Lily like that?" he asked James.

"Nooooo!" James cried, "not at all!" He ducked to avoid Lily´s hand.

"You didn´t get more of that red wine Pierre keeps drinking than is good for you, did you?" the girl scolded.

-x-

As the wedding day drew nearer, the little group became more busy. Pierre, James and André started to put up the decorations in the garden. André also organized the band. Myra, Lily and Angelique were occupied with the buffet. Muddy was a great help for them.

Two days before the wedding the Duponts arrived.

"Hello, aunt Rose!" Lily hugged Angelique´s mother. "It´s so good to see you again!"

"Lily, dear!" Rose Dupont hugged the girl in return. "You look radiant! So this is your Severus! Nice to meet you, dear."

"Actually this is my husband, James," said Lily after an awkward pause.

James shook the proffered hand. "Nice to meet you, too, Mrs Dupont," he said smiling. He shot his wife a calculating look.

-x-

"What did she mean by ´Your Severus´?" James asked coolly when the door of their room closed on them some hours later.

"How am I to know?" Lily answered evasively.

"Lily, stop insulting my intelligence. I want to know why your auntie thought you had married your brother!" James was shouting now.

Quickly Lily cast a muffliato charm.

"So we have something to hide!" James stated.

"Well, of course. Or would you rather discuss this in public? So why did you wait until we retired in the first place?"

"I´m waiting for an anwer."

"What would you like to hear?"

"Had you or had you not a thing going on with Snape?"

"Well, we..." Lily hesitated. "...were an item for some time."

"You snogged Snivellus?"

"It sounds undecent the way you say it."

"My wife snogged this...!" James struggled for words.

"I wasn´t your wife then. I wasn´t even talking to you then."

"So this was why I always had the feeling you were not an entire novice to kissing!"

"You didn´t complain then that at least one of us knew how to kiss properly! And I never claimed to be a saint!"

"No, you´re no saint! Snape was right. You married me for my money!"

"Take that back, James! You know it is not true!"

"Isn´t it?"

"I had no idea you even had money!"

"How long has this been going on between you and Snivellus?"

"Two years, and stop calling him this name!"

"Two years! I can´t believe it! And I invited him to our wedding!"

"That was so cute of you. I loved you even more!"

"Loved me? If you loved me, you would have told me!"

"Why would I? To nurse your ego? ´Darling, I not only love you, I broke another man´s heart to be with you?´ Would you have liked to hear that?"

"Broke his heart? So it wasn´t over before we got involved? Is it over at all?"

"Of course it is! I won´t discuss this any longer! I´m going to bed!"

Lily changed into her night dress and went to bed. James nestled in an armchair.

"Aren´t you coming?" Lily asked.

"I have to think things over," James growled.

-x-

Two hours later James was fast asleep in his armchair. Lily could hear him snore softly.

Silently she lit her wand and slid out of bed.

"I´m sorry, love, I´m not strong enough to stand this," she whispered.

She pointed her wand at her sleeping husband.

"Obliviate!" she murmured softly.

-x-

Lily woke very early the next morning. The house was very quiet, the only sounds came from the birds in the garden and James, who was snoring softly in his armchair. Lily got up on her elbow and scrutinized her sleeping husband.

Had she been right to erase his memory of their conversation? It certainly wasn´t right to keep this secret from him but having seen his reaction Lily knew she would never tell. Strange, how two men so different from each other could react exactly the same way when confronted with the existence of a rival. Lily smiled. James wouldn´t like the thought he had something in common with Severus.

James groaned in his sleep.

Poor darling, spending the night in an armchair must be hell. Not to mention the headache the memory charm must have given him. Lily sighed. It had to be done. She was not going to risk losing James. Not after her experience with Severus. Not after James performance of jealousy and unreasonableness in the evening.

There are no rules in love and war.

-x-

Lily sat gently on the arm-rest of James´ chair and stroked her husband´s untamed hair. He moaned and opened his eyes a bit.

"Why are you waking me? It must be well before sunrise!"

"We both fell asleep in the evening, love, and when I woke I thought you were very uncomfortable in this chair. You´d better have a nap in bed. You´ll feel better."

James groaned and stretched. "You´re right. Ouch! My back is killing me and where did that head-ache come from?"

Lily leaned forward and kissed his forehead. "Poor you! Stretch out a little on the bed. It´s early enough to get an hour of sleep."

James got up from his armchair clumsily and walked over to the bed, where he sank to his stomach unceremoniously. "Oh my god," he groaned, "stop the hippogriffs in my head!"

Lily sat beside him and started massaging his shoulders. James moaned comfortably. "This feels good, don´t stop!"

"I won´t," Lily whispered into his ear. "Did I tell you recently that I love you?" She bent forward and kissed her husband´s ear.

"How am I supposed to sleep when you do things like that?" James complained lazily.

-x-

Lily went downstairs for breakfast alone. James had fallen asleep and given his head ache Lily thought it better to let him rest for a while. When she stepped outside on the patio, she was greeted by a cool morning breeze and the scent of fresh coffee. Aunt Rose and Myra were already discussing the wedding over breakfast.

"Good morning, sleepyhead," Myra cried cheerfully. "Where´s that handsome husband of yours?"

"Asleep," Lily smiled and chose a roll and marmalade, "he says he has a head ache. Obviously he´s getting too much of Pierre´s favorite Beaujolais."

"I have to apologize for yesterday," said aunt Rose. "This was such an awkward moment. I thought I´d die!"

"Never mind," Lily smiled feebly. "We sorted it out and agreed to never mention it again."

"I thought I heard shouting," said Myra.

"A fight now and then is not the worst. It ensures life doesn´t get boring."

"I won´t let Pierre shout at me," said Myra.

Lily and Rose laughed. "You will, niece," said Rose, "and you will be shouting back and then you´ll make up. And you´ll both enjoy it a lot."

-x-

The day before the wedding was spent with some last preparations, but mainly used to relax. Nobody wanted to see a tired bride, aunt Rose pointed out. And nobody wanted to attend a wedding tired. So they spent most of the day lazily chatting and having delicious meals in the patio.

In the evening James, who had finally recovered from his head ache, and Lily went for a walk. They hiked the soft hills of the Provence first and apparated to the mediterranean sea later. On the beach James transfigured some rocks into a blanket and some pillows and they sat beside each other and watched the sunset.

Lily leaned on James´ shoulder and purred contently. "Why can´t it always be like this? Why do we have to fight and hide and run and care for poisons?"

"Because neither you nor I are the runaway type of person. We are Gryffindors." James placed a gentle kiss on Lily´s hair.

"If we are true Gryffindors, why did we leave Britain? What are we doing here?"

"Having a break. Gryffindors are brave, not undestructible. We will recover and enjoy ourselves for a while. And then we´ll go back and go on fighting. This is what Gryffindors do."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

-x-

Myra´s wedding day was perfect. It was sunny, but not too hot. The air was perfumed with the scent of various flowers. Lily and Angelique helped the bride with her dress and hairstyle. The two of them both wore green dresses which went well with their dark red hair. (Lily had magiced the original color of her wedding dress back.)

Lily and James sat side by side and watched the making of vows and exchanging of rings hand in hand. When Pierre swore he´d love Myra for the rest of his life, James squeezed his wife´s hand gently and she returned the gesture.

On an overall view, Lily enjoyed Myra´s wedding much more than her own. She danced once with Pierre because it would have been considered rude not to, but the rest of the day was spent with James.

They had small plates full of delicacies from the buffet together, they shared some quiet moments sipping red wine, but what was most important, they danced until their feet hurt. Lily enjoyed being in James´ arms and moving together to the music. When they were having a pause to have some juice, aunt Rose joined them.

"It´s difficult to tell," she smiled, "who is more in love, the young couple or you two. I´m glad you´re so happy."

"Thank you," said Lily. "It´s easy to be happy with this wonderful man." She leaned back until she felt James at her shoulders.

"A compliment I can easily return," James said with his boyish smile and kissed Lily´s hair.

-x-

Myra and Pierre left for their honeymoon the next morning. Lily hugged her best friend good-bye and off they were. Both refused to tell where they were going.

"Somewhere, where it´s warm. She packed summer clothes into her suitcase," said Angelique.

"Wherever they go, I hope they have a wonderful holiday," said Lily and smiled. "I´ll pack our things then, too."

"You aren´t going to leave today, are you?" asked Angelique.

"We have to," said James. "We promised to be back within a month and there are so many places we want to go."

Back up in their room Lily packed their bags, while James wrapped the books he had bought in brown paper. D´Artagnan was to take them to Sirius and meet them later in Crete.

-x-

"Look at that landscape!" cried James.

"It´s beautiful!" Lily confirmed without stopping to pick little blue flowers.

"You´re not even looking!"

"I´ll be looking as soon as I have picked enough of these gentian flowers."

"What are they good for?"

"They are poisonous. So they will be useful for antidotes."

"I thought the book we bought said the muggles use them. Do muggles brew antidotes?" James asked without drawing his eyes from the breathtaking view of the Austrian alps.

"They make schnaps from them. It´s as magical as a muggle brew can be."

"Stop picking now and come here!"

"Not before I´m finished. You could help me, you know!"

James sighed and started picking flowers.

-x-

The gondoliere sang ´O sole mio´ on the top of his lungs. Lily cuddled in James´ arms and enjoyed the sight of the historic buildings along the Grand Canal.

They had spent the whole day exploring the many churches of Venice. In one Lily had found ancient runes in the upper part of a pillar. She had magically copied them on a piece of parchment when she recognized the symbol for protection in the semidarkness. James watched out to prevent the muggles from noticing Lily´s use of magic.

"Riding this boat with you is very romanticc," said James. "I only wish he´d stop wailing."

Lily chuckled. "He´s singing and you payed him extra to do it."

"Did I? In this case it´s my right to use a silencing charm on him."

-x-

Crete was colorful in spring. Lily had seen it during Easter break. Whilst the green had been light and fresh then and dotted with first flowers, the colors of May were more intense. It seemed as if the island wanted to make use of all colors before becoming dry and gray in the summer heat.

Lily and James spent some days at the beach, visiting small fishing villages in the evenings. The Greek cuisine was rich and delicious. Lily couldn´t get enough of souvlaki and tsatsiki. James enjoyed mousaka very much. They had found a small taverna near the beach, where Georgios, a huge Greek with a beard reminding of Dumbledore´s, prepared the dishes in an old traditional wood-burning stove. The tables stood under a roof of tendrils of wine. The leaves rustled when the wind touched them or when one of Georgios´ cats climbed on the roof.

"Are you sure this was a school?" James looked doubtful. "This sign says it was a palace."

"It´s a muggle sign, love, of course it doesn´t say this was a wizarding school."

"Why are we here? There´s not much left to see."

"Do you remember the photos with the ancient charms? I took them here when I visited with the Duponts. There must be more runes. I want to copy them all."

-x-

"Merlin! Look at this! Those Egyptian wizards were so inventive!" James was bent over a wizard map of the great pyramid.

"Stop looking at the map! Have a look at the real thing!"

"Look at those curses!" James was beside himself. "It says the burial chamber is protected by no less than two hundred spells."

"Two hundred? Are you sure?"

"It´s on the map. It also says there are at least ten to which the countercurses are not known yet."

"Wow! Do you want to go inside?"

"Of course. Right after the ride on a camel."

"That will be soon. Look we are next."

James folded the map and payed attention to the Egyptian´s explainations on how to ride a camel.

-x-

It was raining. James swore. Lily magiced a huge umbrella out of thin air, but it was too late. They were wet to the skin. James was charged with bags, so it was Lily who sent her patronus up to Hogwarts castle.

Five minutes later the headmaster himself came down to open the gates for them.

"Come in quickly before you are seen!" he ordered.

They hurried up to the castle and up the stairs to Dumbledore´s office as fast as they could. It was past curfew, so they met no students.

"Is our house safe?" asked James after putting down his bags. He removed his hood and rumpled up his wet hair.

"It is," said Dumbledore. "But we need to talk before you go home. I suggest you stay here over night."

James and Lily agreed.


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36: Back to Fighting

After a too short night on a transfigured armchair Lily and James had breakfast with the headmaster in his office. Dumbledore sat in the armchair that had been their bed for the night while Lily and James shared a sofa.

"Much has happened in your absence," said Dumbledore. "I´ll fill you in." He poured them tea. "Marlene and her family were killed hours after your departure and the Meadowes were attacked only last week. Dorcas is dead, but Frank and Alice were able to save her husband and son. Voldemort himself was one of the attackers in this case."

Lily held her breath. She remembered Frank saying that he and Alice had been injured badly twice when they met Voldemort. "Is Alice OK?" she asked in a small voice.

"They both are," Dumbledore reasured her. "There were attacks at Peter´s and Remus´ houses. Luckily neither was at home," the headmaster went on. "The deatheaters destroyed their homes but both your friends are safe. Though you´re not the only ones in hiding now."

"Sirius is the only one not attacked," whispered James. "I hope he´s careful!"

"Well," said Dumbledore, "it took some persuasion, but he´s hiding, too. In fact, all members of the order are to some extent. It´s difficult for those who have jobs and can´t afford to lose them. And our aurors are very unwilling to hide. But they do nevertheless. The order meets at the Hog´s Head now. Aberforth bought it and lets us use it."

"Can we risk to go home today?" asked James.

Dumbldore took a sip of tea. "The protective spells are strong and in place. There have been no signs that the deatheaters have located your residence."

"When can we leave without being seen?" asked Lily.

"Between nine and ten all students are to be in classes. You can go then."

-x-

It was good to be at home again though Lily hadn´t been calling this house home for more than three months.

It was good to see Remus and Sirius again who had obviously been checking daily whether they had returned.

It was good to have a chat with them over a cup of tea and some marzipan sweets.

It was good to give them their souvenirs and see Sirius´ boyish enthusiasm about a muggle witch doll they had bought for him at a small Austrian shop.

It was good to be back.

-x-

Two weeks later Lily and James attended an order meeting at the Hog´s Head. Aberforth had prepared one of the private rooms for them. Dorcas and Marlene were missing. Lily couldn´t believe she was never going to see them again.

"There has been less poisoning over the last weeks," said Alastor. "This sounds like good news, but it isn´t. It seems that the use of poison is too slow for them nowadays. They attack with wands and spells recently."

"We need to train up then," said Benjamin Fenwick, who had joined the order only months ago.

"Indeed we need to," said Alastor. "For it seems they know which spells we are going to use in advance."

"How is this possible?" asked Lily.

"Well," answered the auror, "I can think of two ways. Either they learned legilimency or they have a spy in our midst."

"A spy?" several people gasped.

"Please, calm down," Albus Dumbledore said softly. "Never forget, my friends, that our unity is our strenght. We mustn´t let distrust divide us!"

"But Albus," cried Alastor, "if there is a spy among us, he may sell us all to Voldemort. One by one. We already lost Dorcas and Marlene."

"What do you suggest, Alastor?"

Moody eyed their leader hesitantly. "You are a legilimens, Albus."

"I will not sink to Voldemort´s level." The headmaster´s tone left no doubt that this was his last word.

-x-

As the other side tended to use wandwork rather than poisons, Lily spent more time translating runes than brewing. In fact her activities at the lab – which was tiny in comparison to the one she had inherited from Harold – were confined to brewing medical potions for the order members. Healing draughts, oinment salves, pepper-up potions.

Instead she was found at a desk in the living room most of the time, studying the books and parchments she had brought from their journey. The runes from the Venetian church proved very useful. They described a very powerful charm to protect buildings. Lily used it on her own house and Dumbledore volunteered to try to get past the new protection. It took him more than ten minutes, which was – considering how powerful he was – an eternity.

"Wonderful!" he cried. "This charm is a good find! Ten minutes give the inhabitants plenty of time to prepare for a battle or flee."

He agreed that he would be the only one to learn the new charm. That way the spy, if he existed at all, couldn´t give it to Voldemort. Any member of the order was free to ask Dumbledore or Lily to use it on their home.

-x-

Summer came and went and as autumn neared its end, the Order of the Phoenix had to face the fact that they indeed had a spy among them. There was not one single meeting without reports of attacks. Attacks on people who were well hidden. People who had told only a handful of friends where to find them.

The spy however, seemed to be clever for they never managed to figure out who he was. They tried by comparing lists of who knew where to find the attacked people. But it wasn´t possible to narrow it down to one name.

Members started to ask Dumbledore to catch the spy with legilimency, but the latter refused. He was not going to violate the minds of his allies. Not even with their permission.

-x-

Lily and James were attacked late in November on their way home from a meeting. They had walked through the village of Hogsmeade to apparate from the forests, when they heard the voice they had heard only once before.

"What a pleasure to meet you again," Voldemort said softly, his voice barely more than a whisper. "You will not send insects at me again, I hope."

Lily stood transfixed.

"What do you want?" asked James. Lily wondered how he managed to keep his voice firm.

"Nothing you could give me." Voldemort said coolly. "I said last time, I want your wife to join my deatheaters. I may consider letting you live to show her what a generous lord I am. And I may kill you painfully to show her how unforgiving I can be. Chose, witch, what will you earn? My generosity or my wrath?"

"I will not join you!" said Lily.

Seconds later James´ yells echoed from the trees. Voldemort took his time before he lifted the curse.

"Think again, girl," he said pointing his wand at the crumpled form of Lily´s husband.

Lily stepped between James and Voldemort. "I will not join you," she said in a shaky voice. The pain was overwhelming. Though she knew that the curse hadn´t been cast with full power nor longer than some seconds, she didn´t remember what it was like not to be in pain.

"Lily? James?" a voice sounded from the village. A welcome voice. The voice of Albus Dumbledore.

-x-

"It was him," Lily whispered. "I´ll be OK, Albus. Take care of James."

"Alastor is taking care of him. He´ll be OK, too. We´ll take you home as soon as James has recovered a bit."

"Where is ... he?" Lily´s voice was still shaky.

"Gone. We heard James yell. We feared we´d be too late by the time we got here, so I made myself heard. Voldemort fled." Dumbledore helped Lily get up.

"He fears you," said Lily, her voice a bit stronger.

"He does." There was no pride in the statement. Only certainty.

-x-

It took James nearly half an hour to recover. As soon as he was able to stand unsupportedly, they apparated home.

Dumbledore conjured tea, Alastor stayed with James and Lily went to the lab to find a potion to ease her husband´s pain.

Twenty minutes later they were having tea together. James looked still pale.

"That was close, Albus," said Lily. "If you hadn´t come, he would have killed us both."

"Promise me you won´t do this again," said James.

"What are you talking about?"

"Step in front of me. Let him torture you instead of me."

"He´d have killed you when I refused to join his ranks the second time."

James snorted. "He´d have used the Cruciatus again."

"He wouldn´t. He´d already seen that I didn´t react the way he expected."

"Rubbish," growled Moody. "James is right. He´d have tortured him, not killed. If he killed him, he´d have lost his bait for you. Be honest, Lily, how long could you listen to James yelling in pain? How long would it take until you´d do anything to end his suffering?"

Lily paled.

"Girl, Voldemort never thought you´d give in after a minute. We have reports that he continued this ´game´ for hours."

Lily started feeling sick at the thought of having to watch for hours what had been so terrible to watch for only five minutes.

"Do you think we should move?" asked James to change topic. "Is the house still safe?"

Dumbledore nodded. "He´d have attacked here without risking to be disturbed if he could."

-x-

"I have a Christmas present for you, Albus!" Lily greeted the old wizard cheerfully when he arrived for Christmas dinner. "Attack me!"

"What?" Dumbledore was puzzled.

"Attack me!"

Dumbledore frowned but did as he was asked to. He sent a carefully dosed stunner spell at Lily. His eyebrows rose in surprise as the spell bounced off the young woman.

"Come on, you can do better," teased Lily who had not made one single move in her defence.

Dumbledore tried some more powerful spells to no effect.

"How are you doing it?"

"I told you about that ancient wizarding school on Crete. I deciphered one of the writings I took photos of as a child. It describes how to conjure a permanent shield."

"A permanent shield?"

"Well, not really permanent. But it will last for half an hour and it covers my whole body and moves with me when I walk. It´s even apparition proof."

"That sounds too good to be true. Where´s the hitch?"

"It´s a difficult spell. Not every member of the order will be able to master it."

"Can James do it?"

Lily nodded. "It took him more than a week to learn though. But there´s more. The shield is draining power from the wizard or witch. If you´re protected by this shield your power in attack will be reduced."

"So if you fight in a team, conjuring the shield will weaken the strong team members and leave the weaker less protected than before."

Lily agreed. "And there is a counter charm. It´s simple. If we have a spy in the order, we may not be able to use the shield for long. But I thought it´s better than nothing."

"That´s right," Dumbledore smiled. "It´s a great find, Lily."

-x-

Lily and Albus demonstrated the new shield at the next order meeting. Lily cast her spell and the headmaster aimed some powerful curses at her.

"It will not shield you against an Unforgiveable," Lily explained, "though it will weaken its effects in the cases of Cruciatus and Imperius. We tried it out."

"That´s impressive," said Frank. "Will you teach us how to do it?"

"Of course," smiled Lily. "Albus, James and I will be teaching you. We´ll start after this meeting."

When they parted this evening, Alastor was the only one who had mastered the new spell and Lily could tell that some never would.

-x-

During the next weeks James´ friends came often to visit and practice the new shield charm. Especially Peter was determined to master it.

"He was so upset after the attack on his home," explained Remus. "He´s gone to great effort to ensure his safety since then."

Lily was glad to have the three in the house for she was sure that deatheaters wouldn´t attack a house full of grown wizards.

-x-

The new spell saved several order members over the next months. It came as a shock when the deatheaters used the counter-charm and nearly killed Remus in March. Hadn´t it been for Peter´s presence, Remus wouldn´t have survived.

"So we know for sure now," growled Alastor at the next meeting. "This spell is not in the books. We do have a spy in our group."

"Don´t let this divide us!" Dumbledore said warningly.

"I wish you were reasonable, Albus," said the auror. "You could catch the spy in a minute."

"I will not use Dark Magic on my cofighters."

"It´s not dark if we give you permission. Sometimes even the light needs to use what can be considered dark. You can´t fight the Evil with velvet and honey."

"I know, Alastor, that this is the ministry´s point of view. It is, however, not mine."

"You´re risking our people´s lives!"

"Alastor, my final word in this matter has been spoken!"

-x-

The Cretan photos proved to be a valuable source of spells. Lily worked hard to translate the old writings, but it was difficult. Some of the symbols had been severely damaged by time, weather and muggles, so she had to make guesses and try out different possibilties. The outcome of her guesswork varied from amusing (a living room full of singing furniture, the mantlepiece claiming to be the choir-master) to dangerous (a major explosion in the kitchen, luckily James was there to help extinguish the fire).

Nevertheless Lily continued her work with determination. The Dark Lord had to be defeated. Life in hiding and fear wasn´t what she wanted for herself and her friends, nor for anybody else. From time to time the girl was rewarded with finding a useful spell. She found two more variations of shields – which were sold to the Dark Side by the spy only weeks later – and a spell to distract an enemy. Lily decided that this spell would be entirely useless if the deatheaters knew about it in advance. So giving it to the order was pointless. Probably the spy would give the spell away before it was even used once.


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37: Babies

June brought a very pleasant surprise. Myra´s owl, Amor, arrived with a letter, which contained not only a photo of a cute baby but also an invitation to the naming ceremony of Myra and Pierre´s daughter.

-x-

"Are you sure, Albus?" asked Lily. "We won´t go if you need us here!"

"Rubbish," said Alice, "you go and see your friend´s little baby daughter. We can do without you for a week or two, can´t we Albus?"

Dumbledore smiled. Though nobody was questioning his position as leader of the order everybody present looked at him in anticipation and it was clear that anything but permission for Lily and James would bring on rebellion. "Alice is right," he said, his eyes twinkling, "we can do for a week or two. Go to France and have fun."

-x-

They met Pierre and André near the Eiffel tower. It was very hot even for July and Lily wished they had not to stay in the city, but Myra and Pierre had chosen an appartment near the ministry, which meant in the middle of Paris.

"First I thought we´d walk," said Pierre. "It´s not far from here and I could have shown you the city. But seeing the heat I brought André. If you don´t mind we´ll apparate."

Lily and James agreed fullheartedly. The heat made a sight-seeing walk throught the city of Paris less than desirable. Pierre took Lily and André took James side by side. They found themselves in a small cul-de-sac from where Pierre led the way to an old house. Although they didn´t climb any stairs the door opened to an appartment in the attic with huge skylights. The second thing Lily noticed was that the air in the flat was cool and nowhere nearly as hot as outside.

"Come," said Pierre, "Myra will be on the roof terrace." He led the way to what was the most beautiful – and first airconditioned – garden Lily had ever seen. Although they clearly were on a roof, they had to walk over a lawn to meet Myra and Angelique, who were having tea between rhododendron bushes. Over the roofs of the other houses the Eiffel tower could be seen.

"Lily!" Myra cried and hurried to greet her friend. The girls hugged before James was greeted too. "It´s so good to have you two here! Come," she took Lily by her hand, "meet our little princess!"

Lily only now noticed the cradle beside the tea table. Myra drew her friend over to have a look. She carefully removed the blanket a bit so that Lily could get a better look. "Isn´t she wonderful?" she beamed.

"She is," whispered Lily, afraid to wake the sleeping baby. "Everything about her is perfect." The baby must have understood the compliment for she smiled in her sleep.

"She likes you," said Myra, "and there´s no need to whisper. She´s used to us talking around her."

Angelique got up to join Myra and Lily at the cradle. "She´s magnifique, isn´t she? Hi, Lily."

Lily nodded. Truth to be told, she had never before seen something equally beautiful or perfect. The baby´s small features looked like porcelain and its hands and fingers seemed too delicate to touch.

"I´m appointed her godmother," Angelique continued proudly. "I can´t wait till she´s old enough to hold a wand."

"I dread to imagine what you´ll teach her," teased Pierre. "And now step aside, girls, the man hasn´t seen my daughter yet." He pushed James closer to the cradle. "What do you say?"

"She´s perfect!" cried James. "Merlin, I don´t want to be in your shoes when she´s old enough to go out!"

Pierre paled. "I didn´t think about that!"

"Calm down," laughed Myra. "She´s going to be daddy´s little girl for some years."

-x-

When the baby woke shortly before lunch, Myra insisted on Lily to hold her.

"I never held a baby before, I´m going to drop her!" said Lily nervously.

"Rubbish!" said Myra and handed her daughter over to her friend.

Lily was sure the baby would start to cry for she had never felt that clumsy in her life. But it didn´t. Instead the little girl watched her with big blue eyes and tried to get hold of one of Lily´s red locks.

"Don´t let her grab your hair," advised Myra. "You´ll be astonished how strong she is!"

Lily tossed her head and her hair flew back like a veil. The baby watched in amazement and smiled. Then she stretched her little hands and the smile vanished when she got aware that she wouldn´t be allowed to touch the hair.

"She´s going to cry, what am I to do?" Lily became nervous.

"Give her your finger to hold."

Lily did as she was told. The baby took her finger in her tiny hand and squeezed. Lily smiled. Never before had she felt so good.

"I know who´s next to have one," Pierre teased. The men were already seated at the table while the women were assembled around the cradle.

"I´ve nothing against it," said James. "She looks even more beautiful with a baby in her arms, doesn´t she?"

-x-

"What do you think?" asked James and drew his wife closer to his side.

"What do I think about what?" Lily nestled her head on James´ shoulder.

They had stayed up and chatted with Myra and Pierre till well after midnight. Their main topic had been, of course, the baby.

"About having our own baby," said James. "You look adorable with that little angel in your arms."

Lily bit her lip. "It felt right to hold the baby," she admitted, "but..."

"I know we agreed to wait," said James. "But that was because you wanted a job. Well, you have one and, most conveniently, you work at home."

"You forget what kind of job I have. I´m fighting the darkest creature ever. Our baby would be an orphan before reaching the age of five."

James sighed. "I guess this is a no."

Lily raised on her elbow to look into James´ eyes in the semidarkness of their bedroom.

"One day we´ll have a baby, love," she said solemnly. "But not now. Not with the weekly attacks."

"I´m looking forward to the day."

"So am I." Lily bent down to kiss her husband.

-x-

As neither Myra nor Pierre were pious, they had chosen a naming ceremony over a baptism. On Sunday a cheerful crowd of relatives and friends gathered at the appartement. A very old wizard, who turned out to be Pierre´s great-grandfather, spoke words of blessing and performed some protective charms. Then he announced that Myra and Pierre had chosen to name their daughter Aimée. The present witches and wizards chorused the name to acknowledge it and then it was over.

They gathered around a big table. Muddy and some of uncle Aureus´ elves served a delicious feast. The little princess slept in her cradle.

After the meal presents were given to the young family, mostly toys for the baby and purses full of heavy gold galleons. Some older relatives had brought magical items they wished to pass on to little Aimée. An uncle, who had apparated all the way from Egypt, gave the baby an onyx scarab, which was more than five thousand years old. It had, he said, spells on it, which granted the owner health and wealth.

"But uncle!" cried Pierre, "what will you do without it?"

"My boy, I have more money my wife and children can spend and at an age of 190 minor pains won´t come unexpected."

"Is he really 190 years old?" Lily asked Myra in a whisper. "I´d have guessed he was sixty."

"He´s not!" grinned Myra. "The vain old devil always cheats. Pierre says he´s over 200."

-x-

After some more days in Paris, including some visits to various book shops in the Ruelle des Secrets, Lily and James returned home. Lily resumed her work, looking for useful spells and brewing potions for the Order of the Phoenix.

In the evenings they often sat on the sofa, enjoying a cup of tea and talking about little Aimée.

-x-

It happened in September. Emmeline Vance was unusually cheerful when she arrived at the meeting.

"Thank you so much, Albus," she beamed. "We´d have been lost without your warning. My husband heard them apparate in before he left!"

"You were able to warn Emmeline before an attack?" Frank asked in disbelief. "How come, Albus?"

The headmaster smiled. "This, my friends, I can´t tell you. The only important matter is that I was able to. I´m glad my warning came in time. I got notice of the attack so short I feared I might be too late."

"It indeed was close," said Emmeline.

-x-

Over the next weeks things changed. There wasn´t one single successful attack in five weeks. He still refused to tell where he got the information from, but Albus was able to warn his friends before they were attacked. Twice the aurors were even there in time to await the deatheaters. Five were caught and two were killed.

"You know what I think?" said Lily one evening when she slid under her blanket.

"What you think about what?" asked James sleepyly.

"About the baby question."

James was wide awake in an instant. "The baby question?"

"Well, I thought now that Albus is warning people, we might want to reconsider it."

-x-

"You´d better enjoy this," Lily told her husband teasingly as he was opening presents under the Christmas tree, his eyes twinkling with boyish excitement. "This will be the last time you´re the most important person in this."

"What are you talking about?" asked James absentmindedly while he was shaking a small gift box to hear what was in it.

"I´m talking about this little person being more important than you next year," Lily answered softly and stroked her stomach.

The hand with the gift box stopped in midair and James blinked. "Do you mean to tell me ...?" He stared in Lily in disbelief. Then the box was dropped (Lily jumped at the sound of breaking glass) and James hugged Lily tightly.

"Stop it," she laughed, "you´re going to strangle us both!"

"Sorry, love," James panted, "sorry, baby!" He stroked Lily´s stomach as well. "Oh, I can´t wait to tell Sirius and the others!"

"I´ll kill you if you do! I want to keep our little secret for a while!"

"A little secret? Well, why not?"

-x-

Later that day Sirius, Remus and Peter visited for Christmas dinner. Lily could tell that James nearly burst to tell them the news, but he kept his promise and didn´t say a word about the baby. Instead he refused to let Lily carry anything heavier than a bottle of butterbeer and asked her to sit down and rest every five minutes. By the time they were having tea and Christmas pudding Lily gave up.

"Stop making a fool of yourself and tell them," she sighed.

"Tell us what?" asked Peter curiously.

Sirius beamed. Lily could tell he´d guessed what all this was about.

"We´re pregnant!" James stated.

"Oh? Is that so? You, too?" grinned Lily.

Sirius hurried to hug Lily. "I´m so happy for the two of you! Congrats, pal!" He let go of Lily and patted James´ shoulder.

"Wow! That´s exciting! Congratulations!" Remus shook hands with James and hugged Lily as well.

"Really exciting!" echoed Peter and offered his good wishes, too.

They sat back down and the men had a glass of firewhiskey to celebrate, Lily only got pumpkin juice.

"I hope, you´re better at secret keeping than my husband," Lily said later. "I really don´t want everybody to know this early." All three of James´ friends nodded solemnly.

"Now that my best friends know, I´ll be a much better secret keeper," James promised.


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38: Born to Those Who Trice Defied Him

"Hurry up, dear! We´re late!" James reminded his wife softly.

"Hurry up yourself," Lily snapped back. "You haven´t spent the last half hour getting rid of your breakfast, have you? I don´t care if they have to wait!"

"If we´re late, we´ll have to explain. I thought you wanted to keep the secret for a while!"

It was January and they were on their way to the Hog´s Head for another order meeting. They apparated to the edge of the Forbidden Forest near Hogsmeade and hurried to get to the inn.

"Stay!" a voice said which let Lily´s blood freeze. She turned on the spot to see Voldemort approaching with his wand in hand. The wand was moved quickly. Although it was cast nonverbally Lily recognized the spell, having used it for what must be hundred times. Why did this dark creature know the Muffliato spell? Because she had given it to the order, she reminded herself. The spy.

"You knew, of course, that I would be coming for you," the dark wizard said lazily.

"She´s not going to join your ranks!" said James.

Voldemort waved his wand at him almost in a bored manner. James dropped to the ground and yelled in pain. Voldemort took his time before he lifted the curse. James fought to recover his breath. Lily was close to tears.

"Join my faithful deatheaters," the dark creature said. "I have what is rightfully yours and I´m willing to share it."

What was that about?

"Join me," Voldemort´s voice was soft and tempting. It promised the end of misery. "You´ll like it!"

"I won´t like doing evil for you!" Lily´s voice was weak. She was aware that her words meant more pain for her husband. Indeed, Voldemort used the Cruciatus curse again, this time for even longer. James was close to unconciousness when the curse was lifted. Lily knelt beside him and patted his cheek.

"Do you hear me? James! Don´t leave me!" she whispered. Lily knew that fainting would be mercyful for James. But she knew also that it would not spare him from anything. She had heard too many terrible stories. Keep talking, she told herself. Keep talking and buy him time.

"Stop this ridiculous behaviour! It´s not fit for a deatheater of mine!" ordered Voldemort.

Lily refused to leave James´ side. A stinging hex hit her wrist. "Don´t make me use more on you," the attacker said threateningly.

Helpless, Lily had to step aside and watch James being hit by another Cruciatus. She could no longer hold back her tears and started sobbing.

"You know, I can continue this for hours," Voldemort stated matter of factly after releasing James again. He watched Lily sobbing over her limp husband in disgust. "For how much longer can you watch?"

"Please," Lily turned her back on James, trying to shield him with her body. "Be mercyful! Leave him alone!"

"Mercy is for weaklings," said Voldemort coldly. "But I shall oblige and end his misery if you wish." He lifted his wand. "Step aside!"

Lily didn´t move. She thought of her baby growing up without a father. Herself being lost without James. No, it was better all three of them died. She never averted her eyes as the monster stepped nearer. If she had to die, she was going to meet death with her head up.

"What was that?" Voldemort cried out. He rushed to Lily, lowering his wand on his way, and grabbed her chin. He locked his eyes on hers and the girl could feel how thoughts were ripped from her mind. Myra´s baby. She and James talking. She and James ... how dare he? Christmas. James hugging her happily after learning about their baby.

"A child?" Voldemort said in a shaky voice. "But you only twice..." He hesitated. Lily could tell he was doing some quick thinking. "You won´t be useful in this state, little witch. How could you let this worthless worm besmirch you?" The dark wizard was more talking to himself than to Lily. "Can´t take you with me now. No use. He won´t... No. Clean up this mess first." At last Voldemort let go of Lily´s face. "I´ll come for you when time has come," he said, patted Lily´s cheek mockingly and was gone.

Still sobbing Lily got up and levitated James in front of her. Never before had the way to the Hog´s Head been so long.

-x-

Aberforth Dumbledore looked up from the glass he was cleaning with a rag when Lily entered. "Oh my god!" he whispered and hurried to help. "Albus!" he shouted. "Come here, quickly!"

Albus Dumbledore and the entire order burst from the private meeting room. More shouts of shock were heard.

"I got him, Lily," said Dumbledore. "Let go!" Lily lowered her wand obediently.

"Take room two," said Aberforth and hurried upstairs to open the door for his brother. Albus levitated James´ limp form to the room and set him down on the bed softly. Lily hurried after him, not ready to leave her husband for a minute. Aberforth shooed the other order members out of the room after he brought water and a tray of potion vials. Especially the marauders were reluctant to leave.

Albus performed some healing charms on James. Lily meanwhile examined the vials and handed one to Dumbledore. "Give him this, he´s taken it before and always responded well."

The headmaster did what he was asked to. After a while James breathed easier.

"He´s asleep," said Dumbledore. "Now tell me, what happened."

-x-

"It was Voldemort," Lily started with a still shaky voice.

"Would you like a calming potion?" Dumbledore asked gently.

"No, I´d rather not. He said strange things. Said, he had what was mine but he´d share."

"Do you know what he was talking about?"

"I have no idea." Lily hesitated. "He tortured James to make me join, but I couldn´t."

"Of course not."

"I begged him to leave James alone, but this was the wrong thing to say. He wanted to kill James then and I had to think about raising our baby without him."

Dumbledore drew in a sharp breath. "Baby?" he asked sharply.

"I´m pregnant," Lily confirmed. "Well, I thought we´d better die all three and suddenly he read my mind. I don´t know how to better explain. And then he said I was useless when I was with child and was gone. He said he´d come for me when the time has come."

"When is the baby due?"

Lily thought this was an odd question. "In midsummer," she said, "late July, early August."

"I need to talk to you and James up at the castle after the meeting," said Dumbledore. Lily couldn´t help but notice that he was deathly pale.

-x-

At the end of the meeting – Lily had no idea what it was about, she didn´t take in one word – Dumbledore asked Frank and Alice to stay behind and help him move Lily and James to the castle for security reasons. Sirius and the others seemed disappointed they were not asked to help but there was nothing they could do.

Alice supported Lily on their way to Dumbledore´s office. Frank conjured a stretcher for the sleeping James. Only when they reached the office, the headmaster woke the young man with an Ennervate charm. He had them all four sit down by the fire and asked the house elves to send up some tea and sandwiches.

"What I´m going to tell you now, can´t leave this room," Dumbledore started after a short silence. Lily and James nodded in agreement. Alice and Frank didn´t, but Dumbledore went on, so Lily guessed they were already informed.

"Back in August I caught a young deatheater listening at my keyhole," Albus said. "I let him choose to go to Azkaban or spy for me. I was lucky, for he was young and frightened and he agreed to be my spy. You´ll guess that it is him who gives me the information about attacks.

What I want to bring to your attention, however, is what he overheard when listening on me. A prophecy was made at the time. I had to give him something to bring back to his Lord or my spy would have been killed. You´ll understand that once he agreed to work for me, his safety is my concern. I have to protect him as I have to protect each of you." Dumbledore sighed. "So I let him go back with a part of this prophecy."

"What did the prophecy say?" Lily asked curiously.

Dumbledore got up and walked over to his desk. There he picked up the pensieve Lily had seen once before and carried it over to the fire, carefully placing it on the table. Slowly he tore a silver strand of thought from his temple with his wand and placed it into the stone basin. He stired it with his wand and the ghostly form of a woman appeared.

"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches ... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies ... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not ... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives ... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies ..."

The form of the woman shrank back into the pensieve and the headmaster carefully placed the memory back into his temple.

"You don´t think..." Lily was lost for words.

"Voldemort wasn´t told but the first two sentences. My spy claimed to have been caught before hearing the rest but managed to escape. I gathered information and Frank and Alice were the only couple I found who had thrice escaped him. I told them about the prophecy."

"Our baby will be born as the seventh month dies," said Alice.

"The prophecy can´t have meant us." James said tiredly. "We only escaped twice."

"Until today," said Dumbledore. "You thrice defied him before your baby was born. And he seems to think the prophecy meant you or he would have killed you today."

"But why not kill us today and get rid of the baby?" asked Lily.

"The prophecy has to be fulfilled. Born as the seventh month dies. Born. Not killed before."

"So we are safe until the baby is born?"

Dumbledore nodded. "I assume so."

"Do you know what he meant by Lily was not useful while with child?"

"No," Dumbledore confessed. "I have no idea what this was about."

-x-

The members of the Order of the Phoenix were cheerful. Not only had fate provided them with means of getting a warning before the enemy attacked (though all but the Potters and Longbottoms weren´t aware what those were), they also learned that two babies were to be born in summer.

"This is really good news!" growled Alastor, "It makes me think normality still exists. Ah, young couples founding their own family!"

Many of the others agreed. Lily and Alice however smiled rather forcedly. Neither of them felt too happy. Of course both were happy about their children, but truth to be told, both were also hoping that the prophecy would be about the other´s.

-x-

"You know, James," said Lily. "If we get a daughter, he´ll see the prophecy can´t mean our baby. If we´re lucky, he´ll leave us alone."

"And go after Frank and Alice," said James with a sigh.

Lily blushed. "Am I a bad friend," she asked, "when I wish my baby to be safe? I know he´ll go after them and I´m horrified at the thought. But nevertheless I can´t but hope he´ll..." Her voice faded with each word and she couldn´t find the courage to word her hope. "Please, little baby," she stroked her stomach, "please, be a daughter!"

"And if you´re a son," added James and wrapped his arms around Lily´s waist from behind, "please, wait for August."

Lily leaned back in her husband´s arms. "There´s still hope," she whispered.

-x-

Knowing that they were safe for the moment had its advantages. Lily even dared to pay a visit to Molly whom she hadn´t seen for quite a while as she didn´t want to risk being attacked near Molly and her children. The kind plump witch was, not really a surprise, with child herself. She and Lily were having tea at the kitchen table while three red-haired boys played hide and seek around them and two more – the youngest – were fast asleep on the living room sofa.

"We always wanted a big family," Molly smiled. "Stop doing this to your brother immediately, Charles Weasley, or I´ll tell your father!" The little boy stopped hitting his younger brother with his toy wand, but Lily could tell he was already thinking of a new prank.

"How can you be so calm?" she asked. "How can you keep an eye on all three of them. Not to think if the others are awake!"

Molly laughed. "Yes, those two are a bit of a problem. Troublemakers at the age of two."

"Not long and there´ll be six of them."

"She´s due in four weeks."

"She?"

"I do hope it´s a girl this time. Girls are more reasonable."

"Who told you that?" Lily was thinking about her sister.

Molly chuckled. "And yours? When will you be a mum?"

"In August," Lily said.

They chatted happily for a while, Molly providing pieces of advice concerning the baby. Lily was glad to talk to a woman for once. In the order her only female friend was Alice and since they knew that one of them was probably going to be hunted by the deatheaters, things hadn´t quite been the same between them. Seemingly Alice had similar thoughts to Lily´s.

Later Sirius came to pick Lily up. James had gone to London on a business meeting and he wouldn´t let Lily go home alone.

"How´s my favorite mother to be?" Sirius greeted Lily cheerfully. "No offence, Molly," he added with a glance at the latter. "Are you ready, Lily? I promised, we´d see Remus before going home."

Lily heard about seeing Remus the first time, but assuming that this was about order business, she didn´t ask but got up and took her leave of Molly.

-x-

"What´s this about Remus?" she asked when they had left the house. It had been the full moon only last night and Remus had been assigned by Dumbledore to contact a pack of werewolves.

"He´s been hurt," said Sirius, "but not severely. No need to worry." He glanced at Lily. "All he needs is a wound salve. Can you make one for him?"

"Of course, if he has the ingredients. On second thought we´d better go to my lab and then bring him the salve."

Sirius shook his head. "I think you should see the wounds first."

"So he´s injured badly?" Lily was worried.

"Not really, but I suspect there are some werewolf bites. Can you recognize werewolf bites?"

"I think so."

-x-

They apparated near Remus´ small house and Sirius murmured an incantation under his breath to allow them entry. The werewolf lay on his sofa, asleep. He always was exhausted after a transformation. Lily smelled blood the moment she entered the room.

"Urgh!" she pressed her palm on her face. "I think I´m going to be sick." She had been oversensitive at scents for some weeks now. It usually didn´t help with brewing potions. Lily reached into her pocket and searched for the small vial she had started carrying around. After some drops of the potion she felt better and stepped into the room.

"Help me with his robes," Lily ordered. Sirius obliged and opened Remus´ robes to make Lily see the wounds on the werewolf´s chest.

"Yes, this is a werewolf bite," Lily pointed at one wound. "The rest are just scratches. Are there more?"

"No," Remus murmured sleepily. "Not if you´ve already seen my ear."

"I haven´t," Lily carefully moved his hair from his ear. "I see, yes, that´s another bite. What, for Merlin´s sake, happened to you?"

"I approached the pack like I had promised I would. The leader, Fenrir Greyback, saw a rival in me and attacked." Remus started to shiver at the memory.

"Sssshhhh," Lily said softly, "it´s over. You´re safe."

"I know," Remus replied weakly. "It´s only... Greyback must have been the one who originally bit me or these bites would look much worse."

"I don´t understand."

"This wasn´t the first time I got into a fight with another werewolf at the full moon. Nor was it the first time I got bitten." Remus explained. "Usually werewolf bites swell and become inflamed within minutes. But not these. The wounds don´t inflame when you´re bitten by the one who turned you into a werewolf. It´s like the body recognizes his touch."

"Merlin! You mean he bit you when you were a boy!"

Remus nodded. "He recognized the signs, too. He stopped attacking me when he saw I was one of his ... creations. I´m a member of his pack now."

Sirius grinned . "He recognized you as part of the family."

"He did." Never before had Remus sounded so bitter.

"I´ll brew you up something for the bites," said Lily. "Where are your potion ingredients?"

"Kitchen," Remus murmured and drifted back to sleep.

-x-

"Do you think it´s wise to leave hime here all alone?" Lily asked two hours later.

Sirius had just finished cleaning up the kitchen, Lily had been resting in an armchair after tending Remus´ wounds.

"No problem," said Sirius and threw a blanket over his sleeping friend. "He´ll probably sleep till tomorrow. As long as the bites will be OK this is nothing different from every month." He left a note on the mantlepiece. "Come now," he said. "Or James will be worried."

-x-

James wasn´t at home yet when they returned to the house. Lily went to the kitchen to prepare dinner, Sirius in her tow.

"You´ll stay for dinner, I hope," she said while she put a pan on the stove.

Sirius sat at the kitchen table and chuckled. "Who´d have guessed you´d ever say this to me."

Lily smiled. "Certainly not me," she admitted.

"Oh, I forgot!" Sirius produced the usual box of sweets from his pocket.

"Sirius, really," said Lily softly, "you don´t have to give me sweets all the time. And it´s not even Sunday!"

Sirius laughed. "I know I don´t have to. I want to. It´s kind of a dear tradition to me. It reminds me of how long a way we´ve come." He opened the box and held it out to Lily. "Here, have one."

"I´d rather not. I think the baby doesn´t like sweets. They make me feel sick lately."

"Oh, come on, it´s our tradition!" Sirius held out the box with puppy eyes.

Lily laughed. "You´ll clean the floor when I´m sick."

-x-

Lily stopped attending order meetings in June. The weather was hot and the pregnant woman found travelling exhausting. She wondered how Molly managed to take care of her older children in this state. Lily felt like a stranded whale. When the order needed Lily´s advice on potions (she had stopped working at the lab, the fumes made her feel sick) Albus came to the house. Twice he analyzed poisons in Lily´s lab, coming for her opinion and advice every ten minutes.

When Lily discovered new spells – which didn´t happen often as she felt exhausted most of the time – James took them to the next meeting.

-x-

In the middle of July James´ friends moved in. Though neither of them knew about the prophecy, they were told it was for Lily´s protection.

"She can´t flee in case of an attack," said James. "We have to grant her safety where she is."

Alice and Frank had already moved in with Frank´s parents in June. James brought back Frank´s tale of his mother´s delight from a meeting. By the sound of it, Alice wasn´t equally delighted.

-x-

As July neared its end, Lily and James grew nervous. Hadn´t it been a matter of life and death, Lily surely would have appreciated the absurdity of the situation. On the one hand James´ friends – concerned, but unaware of the prophecy – could hardly wait for the baby to be born. On the other hand Lily and James, who were supposed to be unpatiently waiting for their first child, praised the baby for every day it managed to stay unborn.

"Two more days, my darling," Lily explained to her child in the evening of the 29th. "Two more days and it´s August and you´ll be born into safety."

-x-

The next morning Frank spoke to James via floo network.

"Alice has got a boy," James beamed when he came back to the kitchen. "Neville. He was born just after sunrise."

"That´s good news!" beamed Sirius. "Great news!" echoed Remus and Peter.

Lily smiled. So the prophecy was about Alice´s boy. The thought was relieving, Lily had to admit to herself guiltily.

"So you´re next, Lily!" said Remus. "Wouldn´t it be exciting if the babies had the same birthday? With their parents being friends?"

"They could celebrate their birthday together," suggested Peter.

Lily smiled feebly.

-x-

Lily was in labour by next morning.

"James," she said, "I want you to go to the lab and brew me the potion on page 42 of my notebook."

"What is it?" asked James.

"It will prevent the baby from being born today."

"Will it be good for the baby?" James asked doubtfully.

"Anything which prevents the baby from being hunted by Voldemort is good for the baby. And the potion isn´t much more than a herb-tea."

"You´re right."

"Send Peter for Molly, will you?" Molly had promised to help Lily with the birth.

"He´s on his way, I asked him to go before I came upstairs."

-x-

Molly arrived less than an hour later. She shooed James out of the room. "How far are we?" she asked cheerfully.

"Too far," Lily panted.

"How can you be too far? The sooner it´s over the better, isn´t it?"

Lily grabbed her friend´s hand desperately. "Listen to me, Molly. I can´t explain, but this baby mustn´t be born today! One minute after midnight is OK, but not today! Please, Molly!"

"You don´t know what you´re talking about!"

"I think I have an idea by now," Lily groaned. "Molly, please!"

"We´ll see what we can do."

Lily sank back on her pillow with a relieved sigh.

-x-

"Lily, you´re killing yourself," moaned Molly.

"No," Lily panted. "It can´t be long until midnight. I can stand it." Her forehead was covered in sweat and her voice was shaky.

"Really, Lily. I can´t watch this any longer."

"Then leave. Believe me, it´s worth it."

"It´s still two hours to midnight. You´re killing yourself and your baby."

"Killing the baby?" whispered Lily, fear in her voice.

"Killing the baby," repeated Molly solemnly.

Silent tears left Lily´s eyes. "You can´t deceive fate, I guess," she whispered.

One hour before the seventh month died Lily´s baby was born.

-x-

"Is she alright?" whispered Lily. A last, tiny ray of hope.

"HE is gorgeous," smiled Molly and handed Lily her newborn son.

Lily scrutinized the little face. He was cute. The tiny nose. The round cheeks. The small ears. He was perfect. However, he was doomed.

"I´ll send James upstairs, shall I?" Molly suggested softly.

Lily nodded absentmindedly.

"Sleep, little darling," she whispered to the baby after Molly had left. "Mummy won´t let the evil man hurt you."

-x-

James hurried to Lily´s bedside. "Are you OK, sweetheart?" he asked concernedly. "Are you both OK?"

"We are," Lily reassured him. "We have a son, James, born on the 31st of July."

"We´ll handle that when we have to, now let me see him."

Lily moved a bit so that James could get a better view of the sleeping baby boy in her arms. "He looks like you," she said. "Look, he has your nose and lips. There´s this baby photo of you in Fedra´s album. It could be his as well. Nobody could tell the difference."

James smiled and bent down to kiss his wife. The baby blinked sleepily when Lily moved a bit to meet her husband´s lips. "Look," cried James, "he has your eyes. How charming!"

They admired their son in silence for a while. "He needs a name," stated James. As they had been hoping for a daughter, Lily had refused to talk about boys´ names before.

"What about James Junior?" she suggested.

"No, only muggles do that," James declined.

"I´d like a name which is already connected with the family. Tradition´s important."

"So, what was your father´s name? Or your grandfather´s?"

"Roger. Roger Potter. No, that sounds not right. And my grandfather´s was Harrison." Lily shook her head.

"This gives me an idea," smiled James. "Your grandfather was Harrison, my father was Harold. So what about Harry? It´s connected to both families."

"Harry Potter?" Lily thought it over. "What do you think, little one? Do you want to be Harry Potter?" The baby blinked, then yawned and went back to sleep. "He looks content."

"So it will be Harry Potter."

"What about Harry James Potter? I´m muggleborn after all, what about a bit of muggle tradition?"

James laughed. "Harry James Potter. This sounds right."

There was a soft knock at the door and it was opened only a crack. "Rumor has it," said Sirius´ voice, "that you´re hiding a baby in here. May we see it?"

Lily laughed. "Come in, but be quiet."

Carefully Sirius, Remus and Peter filed into the room.

"Don´t stand there, the baby isn´t hidden behind the door," laughed James. "Come here and meet Harry James Potter."

Lily helped her husband take the baby into his arms to show him to his friends. The three stared at the tiny boy in amazement for some minutes.

Remus was the first to speak. "He´s perfect."

"So small," added Peter.

"He looks like you, poor kid," stated Sirius.

"He has Lily´s green eyes. Do you think this will soften the effect?" smiled James.

"A bit."

-x-

James sent his patronus to Dumbledore before he retired. The headmaster arrived early in the morning to find the young family in the kitchen. James and Lily were having breakfast – Lily felt like she hadn´t eaten for weeks – while the baby was sleeping in a basket on one of the chairs.

"He´s definitely cute when he´s asleep," yawned James over his coffee.

Lily chuckled. "He was hungry. You´re not cute either when you´re hungry."

"Am I not?" James sounded disappointed.

"Not really," Dumbledore answered from the kitchen door. "Where´s the young man?" His eyes were twinkling and he wore a broad smile.

"Over here in the basket, come, meet him," smiled Lily.

Dumbledore strode over to the table and looked at the sleeping baby. "Oh, Lily, James, he´s wonderful!" he whispered. The baby chose this moment to wake up and have a curious look at the stranger who was bending over his basket. For a long moment the eyes of the newborn and Dumbledore were locked. Then both smiled.

"He likes you," said Lily.

"And I like him," said Dumbledore. A simple statement.

"What can we do to protect him?" Lily wasted no time.

"First of all," said Dumbledore, "it is time to move to a different house. This one may be protected by strong spells, but every single deatheater out there knows where you live. That´s too risky."

"More than before?" asked Lily.

"Well," continued Dumbledore, accepting the proffered cup of coffee, "Voldemort obviously wants you to join his ranks. He tried thrice to recruit you. This sounds much, but there were months between his attacks. We can assume that recruiting you never was his top priority. But laying his hands on the child of the prophecy will be." Lily paled, but Albus went on. "Voldemort is hungry for power. He won´t accept a rival. The prophecy said this child had the power to vanquish him. He´ll try to get rid of him."

"How can he know Neville Longbottom isn´t the child of the prophecy?"

"He can´t. Maybe he´ll be after Alice´s baby, not yours. But we can´t afford to wait until my spy is able to contact me. I´m confident he´ll let me know Voldemort´s plans as soon as possible. But we´re not to take risks. Not with a young life."

"No, no risks," Lily and James agreed in unison. "Hopefully Alice and Frank are equally careful," added James.

"They are," said the old wizard. "They moved to a new home yesterday. Augusta was devastated to find out she won´t see much of her grandson for a while. James, I want you and one of your friends to find a new home for you and these two. Nothing big, you won´t stay there for long. Lily, you stay here with the baby. I´ll make sure there are always members of the order around to protect you."

James finished breakfast quickly. As Remus was the first of his friends to show up in the kitchen, it was him who accompanied James in his search for a new lodging.


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39: Moving

James and Remus returned in the afternoon. They started to pack things immediately and Sirius and Peter hurried to help them. Lily wouldn´t let any of the men touch her lab – she trusted James with brewing up a simple potion, but not with packing her precious instruments and ingredients, not to speak of the poisons – so she started putting her stuff into boxes as soon as Harry was asleep.

"He´ll be a great potion master, with his cradle standing in a lab," said Peter when he came to see whether Lily had boxes to carry upstairs. Actually Harry´s cradle was a basket, but truely it was standing on the small table where Lily had used to put up her cauldrons.

Lily smiled. "I´ll teach him everything I know about potions when time has come," she said and it sounded like a promise, "but for now I think it´s a bit too early."

Peter went over to the basket and looked at the sleeping boy. "He really is cute," he said, "I could look at him for hours."

"We don´t have time for that," Lily pointed out, "these boxes are ready to be moved. Be careful, they´re heavy. Cauldrons."

-x-

The new residence was a small flat in London. "Finding a house will take longer," explained James, "and blending into a crowd will help when we leave our home."

"Won´t it also help attackers to hide?" asked Lily.

"They rarely attack with muggle crowds around." James said defensively.

"I hope you´re right."

-x-

The new flat was too small for their friends to stay, so they left after a quick supper, though not without promising to come back the next day. Lily and James sat on their sofa, which was a little too big for the new living room. But as the room was crammed with boxes anyway, James had refused to shrink the sofa. Lily leaned back against her husband and nestled her head on his shoulder.

"Merlin, I´m so tired," she sighed. "I could sleep for a week."

James stroked her hair. "No time for that, dear. Albus will come tomorrow to add protective spells to those we put up. And we have to decide what to do next."

"You know, when I was down in my lab and packing those boxes, I thought we should take precautions for Harry concerning the possibility of our deaths."

"Isn´t this a bit pessimistic?"

"No, I´d rather say realistic. We´re in the middle of a war and though it will be Harry that dark creature is after, it will be us who are standing between Voldemort and our son. We must face the possibility that we´re killed in the fight."

"You´re right," admitted James. "We´re more likely to die than Harry. So what will we do?"

"We have to make sure that somebody takes care of Harry if we die," said Lily.

"A godmother or godfather?"

"Something like that."

"Who can it be? Sirius?"

"Sirius? That´s a possibility. But we already chose him over Remus at our wedding. Remus is a very loyal friend, too. In fact there were times when he was a better friend to me than Sirius."

"He´s a werewolf, Lily."

"Are you prejudiced?"

"No, I´m just pointing out that Remus is, well, not the best choice to take care of a child once a month."

"You have a point," Lily sighed. "So not Remus."

"What about Peter?"

"No."

"Are you prejudiced?"

"Yes."

"I really don´t know what you have against him. I always felt you liked him least of my friends."

"He spied on me all the time back at school. He was so creepy." Lily shuddered. "Sometimes I still think he is."

"It seems Sirius is the best choice."

Lily nodded. "He is powerful and he has money. He´s your best friend and very loyal. I hate to admit it but he´s an excellent choice."

"He´ll be beside himself when we tell him."

-x-

Sirius indeed was beside himself.

"You want ME to be godfather to your little boy? I´d never have guessed... I mean, Lily and I are getting along better but I never dared hope she´d agree to make me an actual part of the family."

"Does it help if I tell you I was looking for alternatives, but couldn´t find any?" Lily asked teasingly.

"Not find any?" Sirius echoed.

"Nope, you´re simply the best choice."

"So, what do you say?" asked James.

"What do I say? I accept of course! And I swear I´ll be the best godfather on earth. I´ll play with him and teach him spells and buy him presents and... there´s so much we can do together! We´ll have so much fun, Harry!" Obviously the baby wasn´t interested in fun yet, for it slept through Sirius´ promises in its basket.

"By the sound of it you´ll turn our son into a spoiled brat."

"That´s the job of a godfather!"

"It´s not!" cried Dumbledore from the door, "spoiling is grandparents´ duty. As he has none, I hope you´ll let me take some of it upon myself from time to time."

"Ah, Albus. You arrive on cue," smiled James. "We decided to appoint Sirius godfather and we need you to seal the bond."

"It will be my pleasure!" beamed Dumbledore. "I was going to suggest appointing a godparent."

The ceremony was short and simple. Sirius and Lily joined their right hands and Lily was the first to speak: "Will you fulfill the duties of a godfather to my son Harry James Potter? And if his parents cannot take care of him, will you act as his parent in their place for as long as he and you breathe?"

Sirius´ answer was short and simple. "Yes."

Dumbledore touched the joint hands with his wand and a tongue of flames, cool and blue, wound round the hands for an instant and then it was gone.

"Congratulations, Sirius," smiled Dumbledore, "you have a godson."

-x-

Two weeks later they moved again, this time to a small cottage in Wales. Hagrid came to help them and as a result the whole thing took them three hours instead of a day. The half-giant´s strenght enabled them to shrink their things and pack them into a total of five boxes.

Lily was grateful for this. Packing and unpacking reminded her that she was on the run. The sooner it was over the sooner she could go back to making herself think that she was leading a normal life.

"What do you think?" she asked James. "For how long will we stay this time?"

"Honestly, love, I don´t know." James answered carefully.

"Is there anything you´re not telling me?"

"No, what makes you think so?"

"Don´t try to fool me. You are trying to hide something from me. It doesn´t work. Tell me!"

"When we went back for the last box, I saw Lucius Malfoy in the crowd. I think the deatheaters had found out our whereabouts already. We left the flat just in time."

"Oh no! James, will it always be like this? Moving every two weeks? This isn´t the right way for a child to grow up!"

"We´ll have to think about something," admitted James. "I´m sure Albus is working on it."

-x-

"My spy was finally able to contact me," sighed Dumbledore.

"What did he say?" asked Lily and placed a cup of tea in front of the old wizard, who accepted it with a quiet nod of thanks. Lily sat on the chair beside him and waited for an answer patiently.

"Voldemort isn´t interested in the Longbottom baby at all," Albus said, his voice gentle and full of sorrow. "My spy has no idea why, but Voldemort is convinced that it is little Harry who is a threat to him."

"How very strange! He can´t know any more than we do. The prophecy may have been after all talking about Neville."

"Strange it is, indeed," said Dumbledore, "and even more strange than you already know. He ordered his deatheaters to not harm you or the baby. It seems he insists on facing you himself. My spy thinks – but this is only his personal opinion – that Voldemort may still be thinking of recruiting you."

"He can´t honestly think I´d join his ranks after he killed my son!"

"Seemingly he does. I just thought you ought to know. The deatheaters won´t try to kill you or Harry, but to capture you. Anyone who disobey´s Voldemort´s orders faces painful punishment. This little safety does not include James though. Voldemort said he´s dispensable."

"I´ll warn him when he´s back." James was on one of his now rare business trips as Remus had found out about a little museum in Ireland which was selling some very old books to raise some money.

-x-

Christmas found the small family and their friends in the Potters´ fifth house since summer. Things weren´t as bad as Lily had feared as they had been able to stay at one house for three months in a row, on the other hand, they had had to leave one house after only four days of living there.

Dumbledore´s spy proved very useful those days. It had been he who warned Lily and James – by telling Dumbledore – when the deatheaters had found out about their lodgings. Lily was very grateful to the unknown stranger who was risking his life to save her and her family. She started to think about him as some sort of guardian angel and more than once she asked herself whether it was really fear of Azkaban which drove the spy. Wasn´t the punishment he had to expect when his master found out about him much worse than the wizard prison? Was it possible that the spy had truly turned to the light side? That he was truly loyal to Dumbledore, who had shown him an alternative to imprisonment?

Lily pushed these thoughts aside and finished her cooking. James and his friends were waiting for Christmas dinner in the living room, persuing their favorite hobby – playing with Harry. Or rather playing for Harry.

Sirius and Remus were levitating numerous items above the baby´s head, creating a stringless mobile. Harry squealed with delight when his father added some sparks from his wand. Peter clapped his hands and Lily couldn´t tell for sure who was more enthusiastic, he or the baby, when she entered the room with a plater.

"Stop it, boys, and come to the table," she cried. Reluctantly Sirius and Remus put down the vases, toys and books. James lifted his son from the armchair and brought him with him to the table, explaining on the way that mommy had prepared a special dinner for this special day. He insisted on holding Harry throughout the whole meal.

"James Potter! I saw that!" raged Lily. "How often do I have to tell you that he´s too small to taste your food! For heaven´s sake, this time you´re going to spoonfeed him belly-ache potion!"

"But I gave him only one drop of this delicious sauce. And he liked it!"

"It´s too spicy for him. Don´t be an idiot."

James´ friends stiffled chuckles as he was told off by his wife in front of them.

"Don´t you dare laugh, Sirius Black!" Lily went on. "What kind of godfather are you?"

Sirius blushed and Remus and Peter no longer tried to stiffle their laughter.

-x-

"These are Christmas presents, Harry," explained James. The baby was sitting in Lily´s lap and they both waited for James to open Harry´s presents. The boys were watching, too. "This is from Sirius," James went on. "Do you want me to open it? – Oh, look! It´s a teddy bear!"

He handed the small brown bear over to Lily who offered it to Harry. The latter reached out for the new toy and squealed. "He likes it," Lily pointed out. Sirius looked content.

The next parcel contained a soft toy – a wolf – from Remus. "How very fitting!" cried Sirius and James in unison.

Peter´s present was a rattle and it was clearly Harry´s favorite as soon as he discovered that the thing made noise.

-x-

Two months and two houses later Lily sent her patronus to Dumbledore asking him for a private conversation. The headmaster arrived two hours later.

"What is it you want to discuss with me in James´ absence?" he asked curiously.

"I found something. A protective spell."

"A protective spell? Wonderful! We can do with protective spells!"

"I´ll need your help with it." Lily sat down beside Albus with her notebook in hand. She first handed him an old muggle photo. "I took this photograph on Crete during my fourth year."

"Runes," said Dumbledore. "Very old runes, that is."

Lily nodded. "They´re on the wall of an ancient wizarding school. Legends tell that Circe taught there. Later I went back there and I took better pictures of the place." She showed some magic photos of the same piece of wall.

"What does the writing say?" asked Dumbledore. "I recognize some of the symbols, but many I don´t."

"It says," Lily started her explanation, "that this writing describes the most powerful magic the sorceress Circe has found. It offers the ultimate protection. Once it´s completed the enemy can´t even touch the protégé. If it comes to the worst, I´m ready to use it on Harry, but I need you to complete it."

"Why can´t you do it yourself? Is there a special wand movement or incantation? You´re excellent at charms." Dumbledore was confused.

Lily shook her head. "No incantation, no wand movement. It´s rather simple magic, though powerful. I need you because I won´t be there to complete it. This magic is ´A life for a life´."

Dumbledore frowned. "What do you mean by ´A life for a life´? You´re not going to kill yourself!"

"No! Of course not! It says that if a life is willingly given to protect another life, the wish will be granted. As I said before, the enemy won´t be able to touch said life."

"You´re talking about sacrificing yourself!"

Lily nodded. "If there´s no other option left."

"Does James know about your plans?"

"No, and he mustn´t know."

"In case I agree, and mind you, I haven´t agreed yet, what would I have to do?"

"Make sure that Harry stays with my blood. Which is the tricky part seeing that Petunia is my only living relative. Watch over him, make sure he can stay with her. He has to for the magic only works if he lives with my kin. Even if James survives."

"I´m not sure whether I like your plan. Take the son away from his father?"

"I didn´t ask you to like it, Albus. I told you what I´m ready to do in case it is necessary. And I will do it. Your liking or disliking won´t change a bit. The only thing I ask of you is to make sure my sacrifice is not in vain."

Dumbledore nodded. "In case you ever do it – and I hope you won´t – I´ll do what has to be done."

"Thank you, Albus. And don´t worry, I´m not suicidal. I´d rather live to see my boy grow up. This is only a very last resort. In order to do the right thing, you had to know."

"Let´s hope I´ll never need this knowledge."

-x-

When Albus was gone, Lily sat down to write a letter to her sister. In case Petunia was ever supposed to take Harry – Lily hoped this would never have to happen – she needed to know that he even existed.

Lily thought for some time, what to write. At last she decided on a short message telling her sister that she hoped they could put aside their childhood grudges. She informed her about her wedding, not mentioning the fact that Petunia had turned down the invitation, and about the birth of her first nephew, Harry. She took one of Harry´s photos, magicked it to become immobile and included it in the letter.

The next thing she needed was an opportunity to send this via muggle post.

-x-

James took the letter to a muggle post office on his next business trip, which wasn´t before May. When he returned home, he found Albus Dumbledore sitting in an armchair and playing with Harry.

"Hello, dear," Lily greeted him. "Albus has come with an interesting suggestion."

James took a seat on the sofa and waited for the headmaster to elaborate.

"I know how annoyed Lily is with moving so often," the old wizard started, "I think I found a solution to the problem. The Fidelius charm would prevent your home from being discovered. You´d be safe, not by protective spells but by the mere fact that nobody would find you."

"What does the Fidelius charm do?" asked James curiously.

"It encloses a secret in one living soul. Nobody can find out about it except the secret keeper choses to tell."

"You mean," said Lily, "if the secret of the location of our home was protected by this charm nobody could find us? Unless the secret keeper told them?"

"Exactly," beamed Dumbledore. "Voldemort could stand on your front lawn and never find out he was near you."

"This sounds great. When can it be performed?" asked James.

"Not as quickly as you might wish," said Dumbledore. "First of all you need a house where you´d like to stay for some time, in worst case years. Then you have to chose a secret keeper. It can be me, if you like. I´m powerful, not even Voldemort could make me tell the secret. And Lily has to learn to perform the charm. The secret keeper and his identity are not protected by the charm and the fewer know, the safer. You must be aware that the secret keeper – in case his identity is found out – is likely to be a target for the dark side."

-x-

They started to carry out the plan immediately. Finding a house was James´ task. Lily had to learn the charm. Albus came twice a week to teach her. The Fidelius was the most complicated charm Lily had ever learned.

The choice of secret keeper was difficult. Dumbledore was ruled out by his age. If the secret keeper died, the protection of the charm was not lifted, but weakened and Albus himself pointed out that he was of an age where death was not too far. At last Lily and James agreed to ask Sirius to be secret keeper.

-x-

Sirius listened to Lily´s explanation of the charm intently.

"Don´t agree light-mindedly, Sirius," Lily finished. "Mind you, once they find out you´re our secret keeper they´ll be after you. And in case they catch you, they´ll use any means on you they can think of to make you spill the secret."

"And if I spill it, you´re doomed," said Sirius solemnly.

"The position of the secret keeper is dangerous," James pointed out. "There´s not much to be done to protect the secret keeper."

"The only thing to be done is let them hunt the false man," said Sirius.

"What do you mean by this?" asked Lily.

"Well, what about spreading the rumor I´m keeping the secret. They´ll be after me. But the secret is safe with a person nobody suspects to be the secret keeper."

"This sounds clever," admitted Lily. "But who?"

"Peter? It´s well known that he´s not as powerful as Remus or I. Nobody would suspect you to choose him to keep your secret."

"Peter?" Lily frowned. "I´d rather take Remus."

"Remus is a werewolf. He has enough problems."

"We should consult Albus."

"I don´t think so," said James. "Better he knows not."

-x-

At the end of June Lily and James moved to a house in the village of Godric´s Hollow. The Fidelius charm was performed even before they moved their things in. Only they, Sirius and Peter were present. And baby Harry of course, asleep in a basket. Peter had been enthusiastic when James asked him to be secret keeper. "You know, James," he had cried happily, "all those years I was the junior partner in our gang. Sirius, Remus and you had to protect me so often. And finally I can give something in return!"

After the charm had been performed, Peter wrote a couple of notes where to find Lily and James. Those would enable them to ´tell´ the secret themselves by giving a note to a person.

Then it was time for good-byes.

While Peter would return to his normal life, Sirius would go into hiding himself. He´d allow himself to be seen from time to time in various regions of Britain to fool the deatheaters, but he wouldn´t be able to see his friends for quite some time. He hugged both Lily and James and stroked his godson´s hair and then he was gone.

James took one of the notes and took it back to their old home where Hagrid was waiting to help with their things.

-x-

Some weeks later James came home from an order meeting, beaming.

"It works!" he cried happily. "Albus´ spy says they have no idea where we are. Voldemort is making them look up secrecy spells."

"They don´t know we used a Fidelius charm?"

"No. How can they? Only Dumbledore, Sirius and Peter know about it. And Hagrid of course. I´ll tell Remus when I meet him tomorrow."

" Well, sooner or later they´ll find a description of the charm and guess we have used it. But it´s good to know that Sirius and Peter are safe for the moment. You´re going to meet Remus?"

James nodded. "We can´t lose our whole business. I´m thinking about making Remus my partner. He could do the business trips. He accompanied me so often, he knows everything there is to know by now."

"That´s a good idea. It would help us as well as Remus." The werewolf hardly ever got a job and therefore was always short of money as he wouldn´t let James or Sirius give him any.

"By the way, I saw Alice and Frank´s boy. They brought him to the meeting. He´s cute. Looks a bit like Alice."

Lily didn´t know what to say. Her boy was not able to attend meetings. He was not able to see anyone to be exact. He grew up in a prison and Lily dreaded the day when he´d be old enough to understand.

-x-

Harry´s first birthday was cheerful and sad at the same time. Cheerful, because it was his birthday after all and Lily and James had succeeded in protecting him for a whole year. Cheerful also, because the little boy was healthy and strong and had started exploring the house on his own little feet only days before. Sad, because it was a lonely birthday party with no guests but his own parents.

Lily and James arranged a party nevertheless. There was a small cake with a candle. And confetti and balloons. And presents, of course. Remus had given James not only a parcel from himself but also Peter and Sirius´ presents for little Harry.

The small boy was all excited when his father showed him the presents. "Clever boy!" cried Lily happily. "You do remember from Christmas, don´t you? Gift-wrapped boxes are good!" Minutes later Harry sat beside a pile of new toys playing happily with a big sheet of colorful gift paper.

The afternoon brought a pleasant surprise, as Hagrid called and brought more presents, his own and Dumbledore´s. The headmaster had refused to hear the secret to protect his spy.

"You see," he had said, "he is lying to Voldemort´s face enough. I want him to be able to tell the truth when he says I don´t know where you are."

The new presents were a kitten from Hagrid ("Are you sure this is a common cat, Hagrid? It´s not going to grow sabre-teeth?") and an enchanted teddy bear on a broomstick, who was circling Harry´s head, from Dumbledore. The little boy was overjoyed and didn´t know what to look at first.

Hagrid didn´t say no to a piece of cake and a mug of mead and in the end it became a cheerful party after all.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40: Waking Up

Lily woke with a feeling of dizziness. She moaned. Merlin, what had happened? What an evening this must have been. She didn´t remember. Carefully she moved her hand to rub her eyes. It moved. Good. Next step. Open your eyes, girl. The light of the morning sun was blinding. Lily blinked. A golden ring glittered on her ring finger. A wedding ring. So they had finally gotten married. Lily smiled. She didn´t remember, but she wasn´t surprised. She turned to face her husband. If she felt dizzy, he´d probably be in no better shape. He always looked cute when he was suffering a bit. With a soft moan she reached out to touch the black mass of hair. When had he cut it?

At exactly the moment, when this question crossed Lily´s mind, the man beside her stretched and faced her. "Good morning, love."

Lily sat bolt upright. The dizziness was replaced by panic in an instant. James Potter! The man beside her was James Potter!

-x-

"What´s the matter?" James asked curiously. "You look like you´ve seen a ghost." He reached out for his wife.

"Don´t you dare touch me," shrieked Lily and retreated to the far end of the bed.

"What?"

"What am I doing here?" asked Lily. "What dirty little game is this?" Tears filled her eyes.

"What are you talking about, Lily, love?"

"You have no right to call me that!"

"I have every right to call you that. If this is a game, stop it! It´s not funny."

"Where is my husband?"

"I am your husband and I´m here by your side, where I belong."

"You never belonged to my side!" Lily hid behind her blanket. "You are my friend. But you never belonged to my side!"

"Stop it, Lily! That´s cruel!"

"It is." Lily was shivering.

"It must be dark magic. They are trying to destroy us from a distance. We need help." James got up and started to dress. He turned when Lily uttered a small shriek and found her covering her eyes.

James sighed. This was annoying after only two minutes. They indeed needed help. And quickly.

"I´ll take Harry downstairs. You dress and come to the kitchen. We´re going to see Albus," he ordered.

Lily waited until James Potter had closed the door before she left the bed and dressed.

-x-

When Lily came downstairs James was feeding Harry. Harry. Her baby.

"Give me my child."

"You remember Harry? Good!" James said gently. "Come here, you can go on feeding him." He passed her the spoon when she carefully approached. "I won´t hurt you, you know."

Lily smiled. James wondered when he had seen this sort of smile on her face before. ... When they had talked the first time without having a row, he remembered. Years ago on the Hogwarts express after she had lost her parents. A shy smile, not sure whether he was to be trusted.

Lily was her cheerful self as soon as she faced Harry. "Have you slept well, little darling?" she asked the child. Harry stretched his arms and tried to answer, a funny babble leaving his little mouth. Lily giggled. "Come, have another piece of this banana. You like it, don´t you?" Obediently the boy took a bite of banana.

"Oh my god," Lily whispered all of a sudden, "he looks like you!" She gave Harry the rest of the banana and shoved James to the living room. "Why does my baby look like you?" she demanded.

James felt helpless. "Because I´m your husband?" he suggested.

"Never! I always told you friendship was all you could expect from me!"

"I remember you saying so, but you changed your mind later."

"How could I have? What have you done to me?" Lily asked accusingly.

"Lily, stay reasonable," James said softly. "We´ll go to Hogwarts. Immediately." He gently touched his wife´s elbow to lead her back to the kitchen. He jumped when Lily withdrew her arm in a harsh gesture.

"Dumbledore will help me," she agreed however and James was relieved for he wasn´t sure whether he´d be able to make Lily go anywhere she didn´t want to go.

-x-

Half an hour later they sat in Dumbledore´s office at the castle. The headmaster listened to James´ report without interrupting. Lily ignored James and played with Harry instead. Dumbledore did some quiet thinking after James had finished.

"Lily," he said softly after a while, "please, tell me everything about this morning. Every tiny detail may be important."

Lily nodded and bit her lip. "I felt dizzy," she started, "First I thought I had a hang-over. I felt like I had forgotten most of my life. I remembered my name was Lily but not much more. Then I saw my wedding ring and I didn´t remember I was married and when I turned, he was there and it was so wrong!" Lily´s voice had faded to a whisper and tears were setting her face again.

"It´s been the same ever since," said James. "When our marriage is mentioned she starts to cry."

Dumbledore silenced him with a raised hand.

"The dizziness is gone now," Lily finished. "I remember. It´s a nightmare."

"You expected someone else at your side?" the headmaster asked softly.

Lily nodded. James was dumbfounded.

"Lily," Dumbledore said after a moment of hesitation, "as you´re the only potions expert present, I have to ask you. Do you know a way to trace a love potion?"

"A love potion? Who would have given her a love potion? We´ve been in hiding for almost two months, with no visitors but Hagrid. Neither he nor I would do such a thing and why would she take it herself?"

"James," said Dumbledore, "I´m not talking about a recently administered potion, but about one whose effects have worn off."

James and Lily stared at the headmaster in horror. An instant later Lily jumped to her feet. "Can I use the potions classroom?"

"Of course. There are no students at this time of the year and only few teachers. I´m sure professor Slughorn won´t have anything against his favorite student using his classroom."

Lily set out for the dungeons in a hurry. At the door she turned. "Don´t hope for mercy if I find out you did what Albus suggests has been done," she spat at James.

-x-

Holding Harry tight in her arms, Lily hurried downstairs, Albus and James in her tow. She had however to wait for Albus to open the classroom for her.

"Hold Harry for me, Albus," she said. "And don´t you dare touch my child!" she added when James reached for his son.

"How long?" James asked while he watched Lily put up a cauldron.

"Half an hour. Tracing a love potion is much easier than brewing one," Lily answered, putting up three more cauldrons. She was very calm now that she was working on a potion.

"This doesn´t look easy," said Albus.

"What?" Lily asked irritatedly.

"Four cauldrons."

Lily chuckled. "Not one potion. Four. One for each of the most common love potions."

Half an hour later Lily extinguished the fire under her cauldrons.

"Let´s see," she murmured more to herself than to the watching men. She filled spoonfuls of potions into beakers. At last she took a silver dagger and cut her finger. She ignored James´ wincing when the blade cut her skin. One by one she took the beakers and added a drop of her blood.

James and Dumbledore watched as all four potions changed color. Lily summoned more beakers and filled them with samples of only one potion. Then she pulled out one of her long hairs and started clipping off small pieces of it, adding each to its own beaker. The potion changed its color every time and Lily continued, filling more beakers until the potion stayed clear just before she had reached the tip of the hair.

Lily sat down and started some calculations on a piece of parchment in silence. At last she put the quill aside. Now that she had finished her work, her calmness was gone.

"How could you?" she fumed at James. "I consumed Amortentia for years! From what I can say it started while I was still at school! You ruined my life, but I swear you won´t get away with this!"

"Lily," said Dumbledore softly, "stop it. Look at him."

James was as pale as a ghost.

"Let´s go up to the office," the old wizard suggested.

-x-

James collapsed into an armchair and buried his face in his hands. Lily sat down in another armchair.

"Give me Harry," she said.

Dumbledore shook his head. "I´d rather not have him here. If you agree, I´ll ask Minerva to take him for an hour or two."

Lily nodded.

Albus stepped to his fireplace and threw a handful of floo powder.

-x-

"Well," said the headmaster after professor McGonagall had left with a cheerful Harry in her arms. "Let´s try to sort things out."

"What is there to sort out?" hissed Lily. "He drugged me!"

"I don´t think he did that," said Albus with a pitying glance at the motionless James.

"Who else would do it? Only Potter gained an advantage."

James moaned when Lily used his last name. "I didn´t do anything wrong," he said at last.

"Don´t try to fool me any longer!" Lily spat at him.

"I´m not trying to fool you. I´m as horrified as you are. Please believe me, I didn´t do anything of this kind."

"Then tell me who, if not you!"

"I don´t know! Do you really think if I had known, I´d have let it happen?"

Lily snorted.

"Lily," Dumbledore interfered. "Can you tell how often you were given the potion?"

Lily shrugged. "Twice a month at least. Perhaps weekly."

"Is there anyone who had an opportunity to administer the potion to you in such short intervals? Apart from James."

Lily thought about it.

"Sirius," whispered James. "Sirius gave you sweets every Sunday."

Lily paled.

"You see," said James. "It wasn´t me."

"So it was your accomplice."

"My what?"

"Don´t deny it! You and Black stuck together from your first day at Hogwarts on!"

"Albus, help me! Lily won´t believe me and how can we sort things out when she thinks I´m responsible for this mess?"

"What do you want me to do, James?" asked Dumbledore.

"I know you despise legilimency, but for heaven´s sake, I beg you to use it this once!"

Dumbledore considered his options, then nodded. "I´ll do it for Harry´s sake." He looked into James´ eyes. After only few minutes he broke the contact.

"I give you my word that I found no trace of guilt in his mind," Albus addressed Lily.

The young witch hung her head. "I have to apologize, James," she said finally. "We both are victims."

James nodded in agreement and Dumbledore conjured a steaming teapot and cups. "What will you do now?" he asked while he poured tea.

"Harry needs both his parents," said James. "Lily said in the morning we´re friends. I´m sure friendship can become more if we try for Harry´s sake."

Lily shook her head. "This might work if my heart was free to be given. But it isn´t. James, I can´t fall in love with you when I love someone else. That was why I always told you we couldn´t be more than friends."

"Someone else?" James was shocked. "Who?"

"Severus."

"Snivellus? Merlin! Was this why he wouldn´t talk to you? Because you were with me?"

Lily didn´t answer.

"It seems you won´t be reunited today. May I make a suggestion?" Dumbledore took a sip of tea. "You have to determine who´s to stay at the house until you make final arrangements. I don´t think you should stay there together at the moment."

"Lily and Harry will stay at the house," sighed James immediately. "The charm was cast for Harry´s protection."

"I want a divorce."

"You´ll get it. I can´t insist on you fulfilling a vow you made under the influence of a love potion. If we decide to stay together we can get married again. And then you´ll take a real vow. We can´t continue with this lie anyway."

"I can´t ever take this vow with you, James. If you let me go, it will be forever."

"If it makes you happy. I always wanted to see you happy and nothing more."

"You´re very generous."

"I love you. Don´t forget that I wasn´t given a love potion."

"This must be even harder for you than for me then."

This time it was James who didn´t answer.

"Why don´t Lily and Harry stay here over night?" asked Albus. "James can get out of the house what he needs and in some days, when you both have calmed down, he can come and you talk and decide what you´ll do."

Lily and James agreed.

"I´ll show James out and I need to send a letter. Why don´t you wait for me here, Lily?"

-x-

"Will you try to rebuild your family with James?" asked Dumbledore over dinner in his office.

Lily had spent the day deep in thought. Only in the afternoon had she left her armchair for a while to take Harry for a walk to the lake.

"I can´t," she answered now, her voice firm and determined. "I don´t love him. He deserves better."

"So what are you going to do? Make things up with Severus?"

"How can I?" Lily´s voice was bitter now. "Look at me. I spent half a decade in his enemy´s arms. I have a child. How can I even hope he´d speak to me? Don´t talk about him ever forgiving me!"

"Forgive?" Dumbledore asked softly. "Lily, you were the victim of a most cruel crime. What did you do that needs to be forgiven?"

Lily sighed.

-x-

"I´d like to go back home," Lily said early in the morning. "Will you come with me and help me protect Harry on the way?"

"I don´t know where ´home´ is," the headmaster reminded her.

"I have a note with me," said Lily and showed a small piece of parchment.

Dumbledore nodded. "I´ll come with you. But not now. I have a short meeing to attend before. You can wait right here at the office."

"Won´t my presence disturb your meeting?"

"Not at all, dear child, not at all."

-x-

Lily sat on the sofa in front of Dumbledore´s fireplace and played with Harry. Albus had transfigured a piece of wood into a tiny Hogwarts express and the little boy had fun moving the scarlet steam engine over the carpet.

Lily didn´t look up when there was a knock at the door, nor when the door was opened.

"This is against our deal."

Lily started.

In the doorway, rooted to the spot, stood Severus. He was dressed all in black and looked paler than ever.

"Come in and close the door," the headmaster said softly.

Severus obeyed, his eyes fixed on Dumbledore, avoiding Lily.

"Yesterday," said Albus, "I, or rather we, made an interesting discovery. Lily came to..."

"If you summoned me here to discuss Mrs Potter, I shall leave," said Severus coolly and got up from the seat he had taken only moments before.

Lily´s eyes filled with tears. She had told Albus that there was no hope for her to be even on speaking terms with Severus. Why had the headmaster asked him to come? Why did he torture Lily in this cruel way?

"I see you´re not going to hear my story out," said Dumbledore. "So I´m going to sum it up for you." Severus had reached the door.

"Amortentia." Dumbledore said the word just when the young man was going to open the door.

"What did you say?" Severus slowly turned to face the old wizard again.

"Amortentia," the headmaster repeated softly. "She´s been given Amortentia since her seventh year."

Severus was by Lily´s side with a couple of long strides. After a short moment of hesitation he tore her into a hug, burying his face in her long hair, whispering a rigmarole of apology. Dumbledore smiled as Lily returned the hug and tiptoed out of his office. The last glimpse he caught was a desperate kiss.

-x-

Lily returned Severus´ kiss as if her life depended upon it, knowing that it would be the last she got from him.

"I love you," whispered Severus when they finally parted. Lily stared at him in disbelief.

"How can you," she sobbed. "I forgot what you meant to me, I married James Potter. I have his son." She pointed at Harry who watched his mother curiously.

"You were under the influence of the potion," said Severus, "I lost my trust in you. I was stubborn and proud. I did nothing to save you from him. The difference is I have no excuse."

"You didn´t know."

"Nor did you."

Harry chose this moment to stretch his arms for his mother. Lily bent down and picked him up. "You don´t know what all this is about, do you?" she talked to the child in a reassuring tone. "Don´t be afraid, Mommy is OK."

"He´s cute."

"Yes, isn´t he?" Lily smiled. "He´s the good part of this whole mess."

"He looks like you, with these green eyes."

Lily laughed. "He´s James´ spitting image apart from the eyes."

"Is there a future for us?" Severus asked, his eyes on Harry, who returned his gaze unblinkingly.

"A future? You ask me this when you know about Harry?"

"Don´t you think I can raise a child?"

"Are you willing to do so? When he looks like James?"

Severus shrugged. "All people would see is a dark-haired man and a green-eyed woman with a dark-haired, green-eyed son. Really Lily, I´m not worrying about Harry, but I´m worrying about this."

Hesitantly he started to roll up his left sleeve.

-x-

Lily stared at the snake and skull on Severus´ arm. Severus eyes were closed as if he didn´t dare look into Lily´s . His head hung in shame. Lily bent towards him and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.

"Why?" she asked gently.

"Why?" Severus sighed. "I´ve asked myself this question for hundreds of times. Because I had lost you? Because I had nowhere to go to? No job, no plans? Neither family nor friends? Because Lucius offered me friendship and a job? A purpose to live? Once you joined, it´s too late. You can´t quit."

"It was you!" Lily exclaimed suddenly. "You are Albus´ spy and our guardian angel!"

"An angel? I´m hardly an angel," Severus whispered.

There was a knock at the door and after some moments Dumbledore entered.

"I see you´ve already proceeded to the heart of matters," he said kindly.

"Why didn´t you tell me?" Lily asked.

"I had to protect my young friend. The fewer know about him, the safer he is. Have you considered your options already?"

Lily scrutinized Severus for a while, then took his hand in hers. "There´s only one option we wish to become real," she said, "but we don´t know whether we will be strong enough."

"Why do you doubt you´ll be?"

"I´m not sure Severus can cope with James´ son."

"And I´m afraid Lily can´t cope with the Dark Lord."

"But I´ve been coping with him for years! I´d have to hide from him. That´s not really new, you know."

"And I told you I have no problem about the little one."

"So where is the problem?" Dumbledore beamed. "Why don´t you go to Lily´s house and have a nice long conversation? I´m sure you´ll be surprised how few problems there are really."

"I can´t go to Lily´s house. First I don´t know where it is and second, what am I going to tell him where I was?"

"You were with me, talking about your new job."

"New job?" Severus was taken aback.

"You still want the job as potions teacher, I assume."

"You´re offering me the potions job?" Severus stared at the headmaster in disbelief.

"Of course. You´d have to stay here most of the time. Thus you´d be well protected of him and you´d be able to go and see Lily. And I need a potions teacher anyway. Horace Slughorn has been asking me to find a successor for years."

"You´re offering me this job to enable me to see Lily?" Severus´ voice became loud and upset. "Two years ago I begged you to do so on my knees. I told you he´d kill me if I failed to get the job and all you gave me were two lines of a prophecy. And now you offer me the job to enable me to see a girl?"

"You misunderstand my intentions, my dear boy," the headmaster replied kindly. "Two years ago a frightened deatheater asked me for the job. A boy who had just traded his loyalty for his freedom, not a very trustworthy creature. I´m sorry to say so, but I´d rather risk his life than my students´. Today I´m offering the job to a loving young man, who´s been risking his life for love for more than a year. I trust he won´t do anything to betray his beloved and as betraying me would mean betraying her, I can let him near my students. Do you see the difference?"

Severus stared at Dumbledore. "Yes," he said after a pause.


	41. Chapter 41

Chapter 41: Building A New Life

Lily handed Severus the piece of parchment she had brought for Dumbledore. First she wasn´t sure this wasn´t too risky, not because she mistrusted Severus but because she feared for his safety. He set her at ease by telling her that ever since he´d been working for the headmaster, the latter had tought him Occlumency.

"As long as he doesn´t ask the right questions, I´ll be able to hide from him the fact that I know where you are. When I return he´ll ask what I found out about Dumbledore, not whether I met you, visited your house or kissed you."

Albus provided them with hooded cloaks as they weren´t to be seen together and accompanied them to the edge of the apparition barriers.

-x-

They arrived at the house shortly before lunch time and Lily led the way to the kitchen were she put Harry into his highchair.

"So, what shall we make for lunch?" she asked the infant. "What about potatoes and sausages? Do you like that?"

Harry squealed happily.

"I assume that´s a yes." Lily laughed and put up a pan.

"He determines what you cook?" Severus asked.

"He´s easily satisfied," Lily explained cheerfully while she pointed her wand at the potatoes. "He wouldn´t have said no to spinach either. Can you get him a toy from the living room?"

Severus got up and returned shortly later with a toy airoplane. "Do you like that?" he asked Harry and the boy reached out for the plane eagerly.

"Oh, poor you!" Lily cried suddenly, "didn´t James feed you when he fetched his things?" Harry´s cat had entered the kitchen in Severus´ tow and now miaowed piteously. She put a saucer of milk to the floor.

"He moved out?"

"He was very generous. He agreed to get his things out of the house and on divorce without hesitation."

"That was the least after what he´d done! I can´t believe you defend him!"

"What? Oh! No, James didn´t do a thing. All he ever did was honestly love me. It was Black who slipped me the potion. Promise you´ll never blame James. It really wasn´t his fault."

"Black? Why would he do such a thing?"

Lily sighed. "I didn´t understand first, but then I remembered. He told me he´d do anything to see his best friend happy. He told me over and over. Well, his friend wanted me and his friend got me," she said bitterly.

"Oh my god, this was why..."

"Why...?" Lily turned the sausages.

"Why he sent me to the shack in our sixth year."

"The shack? I don´t know about the shack."

"He sent me after Lupin. I nearly got killed, but Potter saved me. Knowing what I learnt today, I'd say he tried to kill me to get me out of the way for Potter."

Lily paled.

"He tried to kill you? Merlin! And when it didn't work, he went for me. And I was stupid enough to accept his sweets. I traded you for a couple of bonbons."

"Stop blaming yourself. Who could have guessed how evil he is?"

"You know, it´s funny," Lily started putting potatoes and sausages on plates. "I don´t think he meant evil. He did it to help his friend and didn´t care about those who weren´t his friends. That´s how he does things all the time."

"I don´t care whether he meant evil. I´ll kill him when I lay my hands on him."

"Queue up. You can have what´s left of him after James and I had our word. And please, don´t talk about killing in front of Harry."

"Sorry."

Lily handed Severus a plate and sat down beside Harry to feed him.

-x-

After Lily had brought Harry upstairs for his nap, she and Severus sat on the living room sofa to enjoy a glass of wine together.

"Do you remember when we sat at my house?" Severus asked softly.

"I liked that a lot," Lily replied. "I always leaned on you and you kissed my hair and I never was as content as at these moments."

Severus spread his arm and Lily accepted the offer, nestling against him. "Tell me about your years with Potter," Severus said. "Did he treat you well?"

"He loves me. He waited on me hand and foot. Until the day before yesterday´s evening I was perfectly happy, only it wasn´t real."

"I see."

"I shouldn´t have said that."

"I´m relieved you were happy. I always hoped you were. I´m glad I got my wish. When did it start with you and Potter?"

"Do you really want to know? It was a bad time for both of us."

"I need to know or I´ll keep asking myself at what point I made the mistake which lost you to me."

"OK, let´s speak about it now and be done with it. We had the quarrel on the clearing and I went to meet James at the pub. I had promised and everybody knew about it and I didn´t want him to look like a fool when I didn´t turn up. You had apologized when I left you, but I couldn´t go back or I´d be late for him. I thought I´d signal you at dinner. I should have gone back."

"You had promised to go and I had been an idiot."

"You weren´t there at dinner. And the next thing I heard from you were incorrect accusations."

"I saw you hold his hand."

"We were clowning around. I wasn´t holding his hand. Not the way you thought at least. Black gave me sweets that day though I don´t think there was anything wrong with those. He offered them to his friends before. It turned out that only I liked them. Later he gave me sweets he had bought especially for me. He must have started with the potion around Christmas. We kissed for the first time at Christmas."

"He told me you´d been kissing since November."

"Not true. I tried to talk to you until the holidays started, but it never worked out right. I found out after the holidays that he had been lying to you. But it was too late. You had seen us kiss and I felt you´d never forgive me. And Black said you didn´t love me anyway or you wouldn´t have refused to talk to me. I believed him. I was so stupid!"

"He gave you the potion and he manipulated both of us. He caught us in a web of lies. What happened then?"

"We got married. James sent you an invitation, didn´t he?"

"He was mocking me."

"He learnt about you only yesterday. He thought you were no more than a brother for me and he wanted my family to come to my wedding. He owled Petunia, too."

"He sent Petunia an owl? That´s cute. The result must have been spectacular. I´d have liked to see Vernon´s face."

"The rest is quickly told. We had some encounters with Voldemort, we work for Dumbledore, we had Harry. You know the prophecy. We´ve been on the run and hiding ever since he was born. And what about you? Tell me about your life!"

"I´d rather not."

"That´s not fair. I spilled my secrets to you. Now it´s your turn."

"Well, Lucius Malfoy offered me a job as a potions master and friendship. I started brewing medicines. He took me to meetings with friends of his. They talked about curses and blood lines and their Lord. Lucius was part of his society and he urged me to become a member, but I hesitated. When I got Potter´s letter I knew I had lost you forever and joined."

"Oh no!"

"I saw soon that I had made a mistake. The Dark Lord is a killer. He talked about protecting the wizarding community from muggles, but it was all about his power. He made me brew poison."

"No! You were the unknown potions master! I asked you for help concerning your own poison!"

"He knew about it and I had orders to be cooperative, to find out how much you knew."

"We heard rumors you were nearly killed when I found an antidote."

"He said I had been too helpful. He didn´t know how brilliant you are. He punished me."

"Were you nearly killed? What did he do to you?"

"You needn´t know. I survived."

"Did he punish you every time I made one of your brews useless?"

"Yes. But not as severe as the first time. He saw that you were a brillant potions expert yourself and he blamed me less. And he found out that I couldn´t work when I was too badly hurt. He decided to go after you instead to lure you to his ranks."

"He wanted me for my potions abilities. We thought so."

"That, and for me."

"For you?"

"He knows I loved you when we were at school. He hinted he´d make you join and give you back to me. That would be two birds with one stone. He gets a second potions master and if we´re a couple, he can use one against the other and thus ensure that we do the best we can."

Lily stared at Severus in horror.

"He encourages his servants to get married. Then he uses husband against wife and vice versa. He does it all the time."

"That´s what he meant when he said he had what was mine. He was talking about you! And that was why he didn´t want me to join while I was pregnant! He thought you wouldn´t want me!"

"He doesn´t understand love. I wouldn´t have cared."

"We´re lucky he doesn´t understand."

-x-

They talked all day. Lily tried to get more information about Severus´ life as a deatheater, but he refused to tell her anything unpleasant. Yes, the Dark Lord had punished him, but no, he was not going to elaborate.

"Are you sure you won´t get in trouble for being with me?" Lily asked. Severus was sitting in an armchair and watching her entertaining Harry with a family of teddy bears.

"I´m supposed to spy on Dumbledore. It has been my assignment for the last two years, apart from potions that is. He wanted me to get the potions job to be able to get close to Dumbledore. As I didn´t succeed, I have to watch him from a distance. This takes days sometimes. When I return, I´ll tell him about the job and he´ll be pleased. He won´t ask more questions. I´ve stayed away for days before when Dumbledore was travelling. At least that was what I told him."

"While in truth...?"

"While I was staying at the Hogs Head learning Occlumency."

"Isn´t that very difficult?"

"I seem to have some natural talent or I wouldn´t have succeeded in hiding the rest of the prophecy from him. Dumbledore had only some hours to prepare me for that."

"The prophecy. It was you who told him."

Severus nodded. "I´m sorry. I ruined your life."

"You had no choice."

-x-

Later Lily told Severus about Myra´s little daughter.

"She married Pierre? That´s good. They always seemed so happy together. What a pity I didn´t see their wedding and their little girl."

"What a pity."

-x-

After dinner they returned to the sofa.

"It´s a bit strange," Severus said after a while.

"What is strange?" Lily asked lazily, nestling against his chest.

"To think that you sat in this very spot with Potter two days ago."

"I didn´t."

"You didn´t? If you were my wife I´d sit with you every evening."

Lily chuckled. "James prefered watching me work and reading a book himself. He´s less the cuddling on the sofa type."

They sat for a while in silence, making remarks about memories from time to time.

"It´s late," Severus said when it was nearly midnight. "I´d better go."

"Do you have to?"

Severus hesitated. "Not necessarily."

"You wouldn´t get in trouble for staying?"

"I stayed away for days before."

Lily got up and offered Severus a hand. "Come, I´ll show you where you can sleep."

-x-

"Are you awake?" Lily asked softly as she blinked in the morning sun.

"I´ve been awake for hours."

"Why won´t you face me?"

"I was afraid that you won´t be there when I turned. That it was a dream."

Lily chuckled. "I assure you I´m very real. I´ll go downstairs and give Harry his breakfast." She got up, put on her green morning gown and went over to the crib. "Good morning, little darling!" She bent down and picked the little boy up. "Let´s go to the kitchen and have a bite."

-x-

Lily had just finished preparing Harry´s favorite breakfast – porridge – when there was a knock at the front door. Lily started. A visitor? There hadn´t been a visitor for ages! It wasn´t possible anyway, because of the charm. Slowly realization dawned to her. James.

"It must be Daddy! Let´s go and say hello!" She picked Harry up and went to answer the door.

It was James indeed. He looked pale, his hair even messier than usual. Lily stared at him.

"May I come in?" he asked as seconds ticked by.

"Of course, sorry," Lily stepped aside to allow him into the house.

"How have you been doing?"

"I´m fine. And you?"

"I missed you."

Severus chose exactly this moment to come downstairs, closing the top button of his shirt. He stopped short when he saw James.

"I see you lost no time," said James.

Lily blushed.

"We lost more than five years," Severus said coolly and continued downstairs. He stood beside Lily, wrapping his arm around her waist.

The two men stared at each other with hatred. Lily looked from one to the other. Harry must have sensed that something was wrong for he started to cry. The child´s sobs cleared Lily´s mind.

"You both claim to love me," she said sternly. "Well, proove it. Harry´s breakfast is on the kitchen table. Go and feed him. And don´t you dare scare him. I´ll chase you out of the house if you do. Both. I´ll get dressed in the meantime." She handed Harry to James and started climbing the stairs.

"So you love her," she heared James say.

"I´d die for her."

"So would I."

-x-

When Lily came back downstairs later she heard Harry squeal with delight. Curious, she peeked into the kitchen. James and Severus both had their wands out and levitated spoons of porridge in perilous loops from the bowl to Harry´s mouth.

"It will not be me who cleans the kitchen," Lily said sternly.

Both men lowered their wands and looked at her guiltily.

"Oh, come on, don´t look at me like that. I´m glad you´re getting along. Did you get enough to eat, darling? Or did the childish men drop it all to the floor?"

"To be honest, you´d rather make another bowl of porridge," said James.

"I didn´t spill it."

"I don´t know how to make porridge."

Severus gave a theatralic sigh and stepped to the stove. James´ eyes narrowed. "Is this why you prefer him over me? Because he can cook?" He started to clean the floor.

"Don´t be stupid. I never cared whether you could cook."

"So why?" James sounded bitter now.

"Because I love him and not you. I´m sorry. You´re wonderful, James, but I´m not available."

"I´ll kill Sirius for this mess."

"Don´t talk about killing in front of the baby," said Severus.

-x-

"What will we do now?" James asked later at the living room. "We need to make arrangements for Harry. Whether you like it or not, he´s my son."

"Nobody´s taking your son from you. It will be difficult, but we have to acknowledge that all three of us are victims. Neither of us is to blame for all this. We have to find a solution, which fits all of us," Lily pointed out.

"I take it that there´s no way for me to get you back."

"No."

"Will you live with him?"

"He has a name."

"Stop talking about me as if I wasn´t here."

"Sorry, dear." Lily squeezed Severus´ hand gently.

"You didn´t answer my question."

Lily and Severus looked at each other. "We will live together," Severus said at last. "We´ll get married after your divorce." Lily nodded in agreement.

"You really don´t lose time."

"James," Lily said softly. "It was our original plan to get married as soon as we left school."

"You were engaged?"

"No. There was no need to."

"If you´d worn his ring, Sirius would have known and he wouldn´t have done that."

Lily hesitated. James had already lost so much. Was she to destroy the last bit of trust he had in his best friend? She sighed. James needed to understand. "He knew," she said softly.

"He knew?" James clearly didn´t believe it.

"He found out the day you ... the day at the lake at the end of our fifth year. He blackmailed me and he tried to keep us apart."

James stared at Severus in horror. "Was that why he sent you to the shack?"

"I can only guess, but I think he tried to kill me in order to clear your way to Lily."

James shook his head in disbelief, devoid of words. After some minutes he faced his wife at last. "What are your plans for Harry?"

"We´ll raise him."

"You want him to grow up with a stepfather?"

"As he can´t grow up with both his biological parents, a stepfather will be fine."

"If you agree to let me adopt him…," Severus interfered.

"Adopt him?" James cut him short. "You don´t honestly think I´ll give you my son!"

"James," Lily said gently, "nobody asks you to give up your son. But if you let Severus adopt Harry, we´d be a real family. I think it would be good for Harry´s relationship to Severus. We´d all have the same name."

"You want to change his name? Never! First he´s Harry Snape," James snorted, "and the next thing I´ll know is that I´m no longer allowed to see him."

"You can´t honestly believe that I´d do such a thing!"

"I never believed you´d replace me so easily."

"I didn´t replace you. I put things right."

Severus got up all of a sudden. "I have to go," he whispered.

"To go?" Lily didn´t understand.

"I´m being called." Severus rubbed his left arm absentmindedly.

"I´ll see you out." Lily opened the front door to let Severus out. "Take care," she whispered.

"I´ll be back as soon as I can." After a quick kiss Severus was gone.

-x-

"What was this about?" asked James when Lily returned to the living room.

"He was called."

"Called by whom?"

"By his master."

"Tell me in plain English what you´re talking about!"

Lily hesitated. "Severus is Albus's spy," she said at last.

"A deatheater?" James shouted, "you bring a bloody deatheater to the house my son lives at? You want my boy to be adopted by a deatheater? Never! No way! If you feel you have to be with your murderous little friend, fine. But in this case I´ll take Harry. I´m not sleeping with the enemy at least."

"Sleeping with the enemy? You have no idea! He joined because he lost me! His situation is worse than yours or mine. We can put things right, but if he tries, he´ll lose his life. I will not abandon him because Sirius pushed him to the dark side!"

"So you´re taking him back out of pity?"

"I´m taking him back because I love him. And he never needed a love potion with me!" Lily was shouting now, too.

"I didn´t ask for that potion!"

"Nor did I! You´re not going to take Harry!"

"I won´t let him stay here where deatheaters come and go!"

"You´ll have to get past me to get Harry!" Lily drew her wand.

James reached for his wand as well. "If I have to!"

"You can´t win this and you know it. Put that wand away. I don´t want to hurt you!"

James lowered his wand. "But you already did," he sobbed after some moments.

-x-

Lily lowered her own wand and stepped closer to hug James. She patted his back gently and started whispering words of comfort as he burried his face in her hair.

They stood there for quite a while until the clattering of something heavy on the floor and Harry´s outcry of pain broke the peace of the house. Lily and James let go of each other and rushed to the kitchen.

Harry was sitting on the floor, crying, in a pool of milk. The pieces of the milk bottle were spread around him and his cat was licking up the milk. A toppled over chair lay beside the boy.

"Oh my god!" cried Lily. "Were you hit by the chair? Are you hurt?" She picked up the infant and examined him quickly for cuts or bruises. "Were you startled, poor darling?" she asked softly when she saw that Harry wasn´t injured.

James cleaned Harry´s clothes with a spell and stepped closer to stroke his son´s hair. "It´s OK, Harry," he said softly.

Lily handed James the boy and started to clean the kitchen. "Let´s go and sit down," she suggested when she´d finished.

-x-

"James," Lily said, "we have to do what is best for Harry."

"You´re not telling me that this involves making him the son of a deatheater."

Lily sighed. "It does. Look, I´ll marry Severus, no matter what he is. There´s nothing you can do about that. And I´m going to keep Harry. There´s nothing you can do about that either."

"So why are we talking at all. There´s nothing I can do about anything, it seems."

"You can make it easy or hard for all of us."

"How´s that?"

"You can consent in divorce. If you don´t, I´ll tell about the love potion and our marriage will be declared null and void. You can consent in Harry growing up with me. If you don´t, I´ll tell about the love potion and I´ll get my wish. I´m sorry James, but in this whole love potion mess you´re in a worse position than I am. You wanted me. I was tricked into marriage. No judge would take my child from me when I want to keep him."

"You´re probably right. Why do you want my consent at all?"

"For Harry´s sake. Do you want him to find out that his very existence is the result of a crime?" Lily shook her head. "I´d rather not. Living with the idea that his parents loved each other but it didn´t last will be hard enough."

James was horrified. "He mustn´t ever find out what Sirius did!"

"He mustn´t."

"But why let Snape adopt him?"

"To show him that we stayed friends. That our friendship and trust is strong enough to give your son a real family. I was hoping you´d stay as a close friend. Harry´d have two dads."

"Stay close and watch Snape lead the life I wanted?"

"It won´t be easy."

"But he´s a deatheater!"

"He´s Albus spy. He´s been risking his life to protect us for more than a year."

"I´ll think about it. But I can´t consent now. Can you wait for a while?"

"For a while."

"You don´t want to make Sirius´ crime public?"

"No! Think about Harry! Nobody´s to know!"

"I told Moony. He lets me stay at his house."

"Remus is OK. He won´t tell if you ask him not to."

"I´ll go and talk to him at once." James got up and left.

-x-

James returned the next day to see Harry and tell about his conversation with Remus. His attitude about letting Harry be adopted hadn´t changed.

"Snape left early?" he asked looking around the living room as if searching for him.

"He didn´t come back yesterday. I hope he´s OK."

"Look, Harry! Daddy brought you something!" James produced a pegtop from his pocket.

"You won´t bring a new toy every time you come to visit him, will you? Spoiling him won´t help."

"I won´t." The guilty look on James´ face gave away the lie.

-x-

Severus came in the early afternoon. He looked exhausted and tired. At James´ sight he stopped short. "Did he move back in?"

"No, stupid, he´s visiting his son."

"I see."

James got up. "I´d better go."

"You really don´t need to." – "You´d better." Severus and Lily spoke at the same time.

James kissed Harry good-bye and left.

"There´s no need to be hostile against James," Lily said softly. "Don´t forget we want him to consent in the adoption matter."

"Sorry, I forgot. I´m so tired, I can´t even think."

"Did you eat?"

"Does yesterday morning count?"

"Does he always punish his servants by starving them?" Lily asked, already heading for the kitchen.

"What? – No," Severus laughed. "I wasn´t punished. In fact he was pleased with me getting the potions job. I was promised a reward."

"A reward? What can it be?" Lily placed a bowl of soup in front of Severus, who sighed.

"You. He promised to kill Potter and give you to me when he finds you. We have to warn Potter."

"Why didn´t you warn him at once? He only left two minutes ago!"

"Sorry. I forgot."

"Eat now. I´ll tell him." Lily sent her bat patronus to find James. "Why didn´t you eat then?"

"He made me brew potions. I won´t have much time to do so when I´m at Hogwarts."

"More poisons?"

"No, mostly healing draughts. It seems that he has a spy in his ranks. His servants get hurt," Severus grinned.

-x-

September approached quickly and Severus got nervous. "I´m not sure I´m up to teaching," he confessed. "Just think about it, some of them were there when I was a student."

"You´ll do well," Lily reassured him, "just prepare your lessons well and they will recognize you´re a competent teacher."

"I wish I had your certainty."

-x-

"It's a disaster," Severus dropped into an armchair. It was his first weekend as a teacher. "The seventh years have wasted no time telling the younger students about my own school-days. And some of the Slytherins even know who I´m actually working for. Luckily they only keep hinting but don´t tell openly."

"How do they know?"

"They have relatives working for the same master. Parents. Uncles. Brothers."

"What will happen to their relatives if a student´s behaviour causes you to fail?"

"They´d be punished. The Dark Lord is not forgiving. Oh! You´re so cunning! Did I ever tell you?"

"Why do you call him that?"

"What do you mean?"

"You keep calling that evil creature the Dark Lord."

"Because he wants me to."

-x-

As the school year proceeded, a routine settled in. Severus spent his weekends with Lily and Harry. He also came to see them on Wednesdays. On Tuesdays he went to report to Voldemort. Lily was very nervous each time until she received a patronus message from Dumbledore telling her that Severus had safely returned to the castle.

James came to visit on Tuesdays. Lily was grateful for that for it helped her cope with her nerves. He also came on Fridays and sometimes on Sundays.

Lily and Severus waited patiently for James to make his decision concerning the adoption matter. The latter seemed to soften up a bit but although October was nearing its end, he hadn´t made up his mind yet.

-x-

"Sssssshhhhh!" Lily smiled. "Come in but be quiet."

James followed Lily into the house on tiptoe.

"Don´t wake them, we´ll go to the kitchen." Lily pointed at the living room sofa, where Severus lay on his back, fast asleep. On his stomach, his head nestled against the man´s chest, lay Harry, asleep too. The child smiled happily in his sleep, Severus was holding him in a protective embrace with one arm. Somebody had covered them with a light blanket.

"Albus sent Severus with a text he wants me to translate," Lily explained. "He released him from his evening duties so we can start the weekend a bit earlier this time. Seems teaching is a really tough job."

"He loves Harry, doesn´t he?"

Lily nodded. "And Harry adores him."

James looked hurt.

"You know that he adores you even more, don´t you?"

"Does he really? Snape sees him more often than I."

"You´re his daddy and you always will be. Nothing can change that."

James sighed. "As they like each other so much and if you promise I´ll be allowed to see Harry, I´ll give my permission for adoption."

"Oh James! You don´t know how much this means to me!"

"To us," Severus said from the door. He looked sleepy and his hair was untidy. He was carrying Harry who was clearly glad to meet his dad. "Thank you, Potter. Harry heard you." He handed the infant to his father. "Go to daddy, Harry."

"Papers will need to be signed, I can´t go to London with Harry. It´s too dangerous."

"We can ask Albus for help," suggested James.

"He has enough influence to organize the paper-work to be handled at Hogwarts," Severus agreed.

"Can you ask him when you return to Hogwarts on Sunday?" Lily asked.

"Gladly. If it´s OK with Potter."

"You two should really start using each other´s first names."

-x-

"Do you know what a lucky little boy you are, Harry?" Lily asked her son. She had been working on the runes text all morning, now she was playing with her boy. "Soon you´re going to have two daddies."

Harry looked at her with big eyes.

"And soon," Lily continued, "you´re going to be a big brother. Do you like that?"

Harry squealed. If it was because of the prospect of being a brother or because of the toy Lily was holding out, she couldn´t tell.


	42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42: Halloween

"Do you really have to go this early? Can´t you stay for breakfast?"

"No, sorry. You know how busy the whole school is on Halloween. Dumbledore´s doing so much for us, I don´t want to make him angry by being late."

Severus pulled Lily into a quick hug and placed a gently good-bye kiss on her cheek.

"I´ll come to accompany you to the castle tomorrow at 9 o´clock."

"I can hardly wait."

"You´ll have your divorce by 9:15, be my wife by 9:30 and I´ll adopt Harry by 9:45. You don´t think Potter will back out?"

"No, he keeps his promises. He´ll be there."

"Good. I´m looking forward to tomorrow."

"So do I. I was a bit nervous, we won´t get our wedding in time."

"In time?"

"For the baby."

"Baby?"

Lily smiled.

"You mean to tell me..."

Lily nodded. "Go now, you´ll be late. We can talk tomorrow."

"A baby!" Severus beamed. He kissed Lily again before he was shooed out of the front door.

-x-

Lily spent a part of the day examining her robes. What did you wear for a divorce? Were you supposed to chose something grave? Black? No, she wasn´t going to a funeral. But if she chose a too cheerful color, James would be hurt. There was no time to change between the divorce and the wedding. Cheerful was good for a wedding. At last she chose a plain green robe. Green went perfectly with her eyes.

-x-

In the afternoon Lily went to her little lab to brew some healing draughts. The order would need them and she wasn´t going to be able to brew much longer. If everything went similar to her first pregnancy, the fumes were going to make her sick soon. Better have a stock.

-x-

Lily made spaghetti for dinner. Harry had recently discovered the pleasures of Italian food and spaghetti with tomato sauce were his favorite dish for the time being. Lily cut the noodles and handed her son a spoon.

"Come, you can use the spoon yourself," she encouraged him. "You´re a big boy."

As the food was tasty, Harry dedicated himself to the task with pleasure. Lily sighed. Note to self: tempt the child with his favorite food, but not tomato sauce.

Fourteen cleaning charms later Lily took Harry upstairs for a bath and bed.

-x-

She was just covering the boy with his blanket, when a sound from downstairs attracted her attention. Was that the front door? James and Severus always knocked. Something was wrong.

"Lily, take Harry and go! It´s him! Go! Run! I´ll hold him off!"

James? What was James doing here? Him? Not HIM! How could he have found the house? Harry. Take Harry and run. Lily´s thoughts raced. Where was her wand? In the kitchen. She had left her wand in the kitchen! To get out through the front door she needed to get past him. Ridiculous idea without a wand.

Noises came from downstairs. Then a green light. Laughter. Cruel laughter. Steps on the stairs.

There was no way out.

The door was pushed open. It was him. He looked even more evil than Lily remembered. She moved between the door and the crib.

"Stand aside, I´ve not come for you. Stand aside and I´ll welcome you to my ranks."

"Not Harry! Not Harry! Please, I´ll do anything!"

"Stand aside, silly girl!"

A life for a life. No. Two lives for a life it was.

"Don´t kill Harry! Kill me instead!" I´m sorry, Severus. Remember your promise, Albus.

The last thing Lily saw, was a green light leaving Voldemort´s wand.

-x-

Epilogue

"Is it true?" Severus was staring out of the window. The first light of morning showed on the horizon but the Hogwarts grounds were still pitch black.

"I´m afraid so." Dumbledore said softly.

"Potter died with her?"

"With her and for her."

"This was supposed to be our wedding day. Now she´ll be Lily Potter forever. She never wanted to be this. Why was he there?"

"Whenever you weren´t there to protect her, he was. Under his invisibility cloak, for she wouldn´t let him stay openly. Did you know that she had a habit of telling Harry how happy she was with you? The poor boy suffered cruelly."

"You´re talking about Potter I assume. – Where is Harry?"

"Why do you ask?"

"I´m the only parent he has left."

"I´m sorry to say, but you´re not."

"It was agreed..."

"Alas, it was. But the papers weren´t signed. His guardian is Mrs Petunia Dursley. His only living relative."

"You can´t send him to Petunia! She despises magic and you know it!"

"Do you wish to ask her whether she´ll give you the boy?"

"No. She hates me. She won´t do anything to make me happy."

"I´m sorry, Severus."

Severus kept staring out of the window. The glow of dawn intensified. Soon the sun would show.

"She was with child. My child."

Dumbledore stepped behind his young potions master. He raised his hand to touch his shoulder but withdrew it. What was he to say or do?

"I quit. You´ll need a new potions teacher."

"You can´t, Severus. The ministry is hunting down the remaining deatheaters. Sooner or later your name will come up. I can protect you at Hogwarts. But I can´t if you leave."

"What would you want to protect me for? My life is over."

"Harry. I promised his mother to protect him. Voldemort´s body wasn´t found, nor was his wand. Oh, Severus, I´m afraid this is not over. The boy will need help and protection in the future. He´s perfectly safe at his aunt´s for the time being. But when he leaves the shelter of her home to come to Hogwarts, we have to be prepared to guard him."

Severus stared at the grounds. Dawn had just touched the Forbidden Forest. After some moments he turned.

"You´ll excuse me, headmaster. I have lessons to prepare."

Slowly Severus Snape headed for his dungeons to wait for Harry Potter, the boy who had – for some glorious weeks – been his son.

THE END.

Author's note: Thank you for sticking with me to the end. I hope you enjoyed the story and would appreciate a little review. Go ahead, make your author happy!

There is a companion piece to this story which tells the events from Severus's point of view. Watch out for "Give Me A Place to Stand On". If everything goes according to plan, I'll start posting it later in the week.


End file.
